Hi I had a right side masectomy in March followed by another surgery for lymph node clearance in April, I have my hospital pre treament assessment next Friday with the plan to start chemo the week after, 6 sessions then to be followed by 3 weeks of radiotheraphy and hormone treatment. I have been so bored at home, there is just me and a 12 year old daughter who shares her time between here and her dads, so I am on my own most of the time - so has anyone been in that situation - how did you manage/cope? I am also mentally bored - popped into the office last week and missed it so much but I have struggled to find any indepth information of people working through their treatment - I am a Manager within an office environment. Can anyone help please?
Hello Tinker47
Welcome to the forums.
As well as the support you will receive on the forums we also have a free helpline where you can talk things through with a member of staff who are there to offer emotional support as well as practical information. The free phone number is 0808 800 6000 and the lines are open Monday to Friday 9.00 to 5.00 and Saturday 10.00 to 2.00.
With best wishes
June, moderator
Hi Tinker
I would discuss with your HR department. Your emplyer should support you in letting you work as and when you are able. Can you work from home?
I too am a nurse manager…my employer has said I can work as and when I want…with no questions if I cannot work. My GP has given me a certificate reflecting this… I am being paid for being off…so not actually a sick certificate
Is your empoyer paying you while you are off? If so yu can go in when yu feel able…usually the first week is the toughest…and you have to avoidinfections if colleagues have colds etc. By day 8 most people feel near normal… but the fatigue accumulates with each cheo sessions… Mine affects my eyes at first so not easy to use the computer or to drive. Fortunately I can work alot from home
I hope this makes sense
best wishes Donna
I live on my own and have been through surgery, chemo and radiotherapy. I worked when I could but as each and everyone of us react differently to treatment it is difficult to offer advice. I would take each day as it comes and see how you feel. During chemo I asked a different friend (didn’t want to put the onus on just one or two friends!) to come with me for each appointment so I had company - which was brilliant and in fact made the day special because I had a chance to send good quality time with each and everyone of them. But I found that when I felt bad (fatigue etc) I liked being on my own. The biggest problem of being alone is feeling that you have nobody sharing the decisions and experience with you - it does get lonely but I was lucky enough to have close friends nearby to help out with some of the practical stuff (walking the dog and shopping for example when I was unable to do them myself) and fantastic friends further afield to offer emotional support through lovely long phone calls. I also took a friend or family member with me for every major appointment so I had another pair of ears taking all the information in. It is also a good idea to have a plan in place in case you have to go to hospital as an emergency - in my case someone on standby to look after the dog! Or drive you to an appointment if you simply can’t - fatigue can make some of things difficult to deal with.
The best advice I have for you is accept help and support when it is offered - don’t feel bad about saying yes please or asking when you need company, practical help or someone to just listen to you moan. When you have finished your treatment you can in turn help others.
I hope all goes well and you can continue to work but if you find you can’t it is a great time to take up a new hobby! And keep in touch with others through this forum or go to a local support organisation such as Maggie’s.
Liggy
Thank you everyone for your help and advice it all has been very useful. The difficulty I found was in the leaflets it all says refer to your HR Department and guess what I am the Head of HR who normally makes the decision for everyone else and by boss the CEO leaves me to it. I am very lucky that I have a great deputy who has stepped up, although I stop getting paid after my second chemo session - from your experiences I have a plan that I can do project work from home and days in when up to it so I can still get paid and to those projects as and when I can. So I can now do my proposal for my boss on a very realistic basis and expectations.
The being alone my daughter and I are going to do some batch cooking so I can freeze meals that I can just pop in the oven when I am on my own so now got a plan in action (our cooking might even improve)!
This Friday is my pre-assessment before Chemo starting next week, was getting a little scared as so close now - got myself prepared and now got a stinking cold so dreading any delay now - just want to get started on the chemo, see how I react, plan, and get through the losing the hair bit (had it cut short when first diagnosed - only just got used to styling it now, losing the hair is the bit I am dreading and needles)! At least this time next year I will be hopefully looking at breast reconstruction, smaller boobs and a tummy tuck!
Thinking of you all.