been told to expect the worse & i have cancer but awaiting biopsy resulrs

[Joanne1973]

I've pm'd you about mri 

😉

[minig]

Hi Joanne, I've got my MRI on Monday & I'd love to know any tips - what's the story with the Evening Primrose Oil? Many thanks!

[Gizmos-mum]

mines in back of hand, boring day in chemo suite with constant supply of tea.
Ask about wig ( my NHS is ok & free), buy some scarves, go see dentist, fill up freezer.check out 'lola page166 anyone starting chemo in August?some good advice there.
https://forum.breastcancercare.org.uk/t5/Chemotherapy-monthly-threads/anyone-starting-chemo-in-Augus...

[helenstevo]

Ps does the chemo go into the vein on the hand or wrist or arm even? They think i should be ok with lungs as ive had symptoms for yrs now he said id be more poorly. so he thinks!!x

[helenstevo]

Thank you for your reply. i had my mri resulrs back & no further cancer has been found so i have just the 1 lump in breast. i had the clips put in today...ouch!!! They just dropped it on me so panic set in. very sore now. I have my pre op next wednesday, not sure what happens then!! tried to explain my anxiety problems but they never explained start to finish what will happen at pre op. Another appointment on 28th with surgeon & chemo dr i think then op on 29th. results of biopsy op on 7th. they said chemo cant start until the op scar has healed but it doesnt take long. so im assuming itll be second week in november. dreading how bad i may be with chemo as i have my son alone. dreading my hair falling out which i think can be after first lot. think i had better start looking for a wig asap, been told theres a place in notts but dont know name. i want human hair. i doubt the nhs will pay? Sorry lots of questions x

[poemsgalore]

Hi Helen,

I think the op you mean is a sentinal node biopsy. Before your op, you will have a small injection of a small piece of radioactive material. It might sting just for a second. The blue dye won't be injected until you are under the anasthetic. They will see which of your lymph nodes the blue dye drains off to, and remove them. I had three removed, only one had cancer cells in it. I would hope they also put the clips in whilst you are still unconscious. I had mx, so don't know about that part of it.

Some hospitals do MRI as a matter of course. I never had one though, so not really sure what the purpose is, but I'm sure that if you were to have something in your lungs, it would show up then. But I doubt if it has. If your lymph nodes are all clear, you can be assured that it won't have spread anywhere else.

As for having chemo at home, I  know it can be available but when I asked about it at Nottingham, they said no. But your chemo will be administered on a day chemo unit. My chemo only took an hour, most of the time was spent waiting for pharmacy to get their a***es into gear and get the drugs up to the unit!! I didn't need herceptin, so can't give you any info about that.

I hope by now you have had your MRI results and they are good. If you have any questions to ask, you can always ring your BCN. Even if she's not available when you ring, leave a message and she will get back to you.

Hugs, and good luck

poemsgalore xx

[helenstevo]

Hi poemsgalore im having my treatment at derby. when i went for my diagnosis on monday frim my mammogram biopsys & ultrasound my mum passed out, so although i sort of took bits in im not entirely sure whats going off due to being upset & worried about my mum. I had my mri on wednesday, im not sure wgat its for? Just a scan of breasts to see if any smaller cancer cells? Or can they see if lymph nodes or perhaps other body parts affected? Im going for results today but as i dont know what i had it for im unsure what to expect! I suffer from panic attacks so i feel i need to know EXACTLY what will happen to me at each appointment, they didnt tell me at my mri id have a canular put in arm i had to find out before off here so at least i knew what to expect. the plan of action of mine should nothing change it from mri is...a op on lymph nodes, biopsy, not sure entirely what happens at this apart from blue dye & geberal anaesthetic. then have metal clips put in round lump not sure if done whilst in op or after or even how its done. then start chemo. the clips are to see if its shrunk with chemo. then lumpectomy then 5wks if daily radiotherapy. i have tested her + & have to take herceptin for a yr & hormone drugs for 5yrs. ive heard you can request chemo at home? This would be a great help as i have a son on my own & alsi i am petrified of hospitals. so at 12 today are mri resulrs, whatever they looked at?! Ive suffered for a couple of yrs with breathlessness & pain in lungs especially when lying down. had xray couple of yrs ago that showed nothing. i always feel tired. i am so scared it has spread to my lungs. does anybody know at which point in treatment i will know if itscspread or not please? Thank you

helen xx

[poemsgalore]

By the way, if anyone is feeling anxious (what do I mean, if!!!) Try reading some of the posts in this thread:

http://forum.breastcancercare.org.uk/t5/Hope-and-inspiration/bd-p/4524

They are all from ladies who have gone on to reach their 5th or 10th or even more years after treatment. Very cheering and uplifting.

poemsgalore xx

[poemsgalore]

Hello Helen,

Are you having your treatment at Derby? I had mine at Nottingham. 

I know the treatment you are to have sounds daunting, but you can be assured that they are throwing everything they can at it.  My cancer was ductal invasive, 3cm, grade 3, stage 2b, three nodes removed, one with cancer cells in it. I was ER positive and PR positive, but HER2 negative. I had chemo (Feb 5th - May 23) no rads, but I'm now on Anastrazole. Oh yes, I had mx. When you begin your chemo, it would be a good idea to join one of the 'monthly chemotherapy' groups in the 'having treatment' thread. There is a group set up for November, depending on your mri results, you might start chemo then, but someone will start a December thread eventually. I was  February Valentine, and being part of a group really helped me.

Sending hugs and best wishes

poemsgalore xx

[Jonamo]

Sorry to hear it is now definitive. The SNLB is ok. They inject radioactive substance into your breast and then after a few hours you are given a general anaesthetic, whils you are asleep they inject a blue dye and use a probe to find out which node the radioactive substance has collected, they will remove any node with that substance or blue dye . Usually between 1-4 nodes. I only had 1 node taken. Your arm will be sore. It is a strange feeling as it is nerve damage that you feel, tingling sensation, sensitive, maybe achy. The wound is about an inch long. For me there was swelling and bruising around it. Stretching is difficult, you must take it very easy and follow the exercises they give you. They really help and after 2 weeks I almost have full range of movement, I still have numbness and a bit of tingling, but it is much better and you get used to it. Though for me I know I am now having all nodes out, so Have to go through it again on 1st November.

Try to stay positive. You will survive this for your little boy's sake. I have 6 and 8 year old boys. I certainly don't intend on leaving them without a mummy, so I try not to think about the treatment not working.

Be strong.
X

[helenstevo]

Yes its confirmed. I have cancer. im .having mri scan wednesday. Operation to check lymph nodes. Got to have chemo to shrink lump before can have surgery. Then radiotherapy then hormone treatment then herceptin as i have the her-2 gene too..not looking good x devastated

[helenstevo]

Poemsgalore ive just noticed your a stones throw away from.me in long eaton. im in spondon x

[helenstevo]

Ps was the SNLB bad? Not sure what happens in one. im still getting over the needle & 2 core biopsys i had (such a wimp)!

[helenstevo]

Thank you. I hope your ok. its all very scary! Well not too long now. my appointment tomorrow is at 2.10pm. ive just been sick with nerves. im fearing secondary. i fear my boy at 8 will lose me but think im torturing myself! Ive been struggling with tiredness & pain in chest & struggling with breath for sometime now, i hope its not a sign its in my lungs too. im off to bed soon with sleeping tablet from.my doctor as im pacing & cant keep still! I wish you so much luck. keep me posted xx

[Jonamo]

Hi Helenstevo, if this helps I was told that they were very certain that it was breast cancer based on the needle biopsy and mammogram and ultrasound but that the firm results would be given of the core biopsy the following week. I was seen by the the breast surgeon the following week who gave me my definitive diagnosis and my options of treatment at that stage? Which was mastectomy with or without reconstruction. Because I opted for immediate reconstruction I had an SLNB (sentinel lymph node biopsy) first to check if my nodes were clear, a week later I got the results of this. For me it had spread which means that I will now definitely have radiotherapy and more than likely chemo because I am young (43). So now I am booked in for mastectomy, no reconstruction for now ,and full node clearance. As I understand it the breast tissue and nodes will be sent off for further testing to help determine the type of chemo and radiotherapy I will be given. Once I have healed from the radiotherapy I will be able to have my mastectomy. Hope this helps.

[helenstevo]

Thank you.ill take a peek!x

[Janet_BCC]

Hi helestevo

I have found an old thread which has a list of abbreviations used on the forum.  Hope this might help:

http://forum.breastcancercare.org.uk/t5/Glossary-useful-words-and-terms/Abbreviations-and-acronyms-u...

http://forum.breastcancercare.org.uk/t5/Glossary-useful-words-and-terms/List-of-useful-words-and-ter...

Kind regards

Janet

BCC Moderator

[helenstevo]

I have pm'd you joanne. really sorry as im.so new to this i dont understand the abbreviations yet, whats WLE & SN? one more sleep for me. i feel nervous & sick today. i keep over thinking & fear being told its spread so bad all they can do is stop it & try & prolong my life but friends & family tell me not to be silly. think im nervous as i dont know what i expect to happen at this appointment. will it be just results from the ultrasound, mammogram & 3 biopsys & then tell me what treatment or will further tests be done? Will they do an mri? Its just the unknown horrible feeling!

You ladies are an anspiration & are such a help. thank you to you all & wishing you all the very best & a speedy recovery xxx

[Joanne1973]

Thinking of all of you lovely ladies. The waiting really is the worst part. Take it a day, an hour, a step at a time. Don't google. This forum really is the best place for answers, reassurance, information, guidance...everything! Everyone has nothing but love and support for you.
I'm a little further down the line, lump found 5 weeks ago and diagnosed 2 weeks ago. With an array of biopsies, mammograms, ultrasound and MRI to keep me entertained in the meantime! (By the way if you want to know the details on what happens at a breast mri...pm me...you will never look at evening primrose oil capsules in the same way again...!!!!!)
Now I'm booked in for WLE and SN on 23rd. And can't wait, it's the next step to beating this. I was adamant I wanted a full mastectomy to stop a life time of worry but do you know what I came to thinking that I could have both removed and still worry, actually they could amputate me from the neck down and I would still worry! So I'm going for the WLE, hopefully will still have a normalish looking boob...if you don't look to closely and should get back on my feet and have less complications afterwards.
If you're pre-menopausal it's highly likely you'll get both chemo and rads.
Its tough, you'll be told scary info from the docs, you'll have to make difficult decisions, you might have to have difficult conversations with your children, you'll feel alone even when in a crowded room....I might not know you, any of you,, but I do know you'll find some incredible inner strength from somewhere and you'll find your own way to live with this and you'll blooming well fight this with every ounce of your body!
You are all amazing 🙂

[DillyC]

Hi Helen.... and everyone else....

It has been really good to hear everyone's experiences... I too was diagnosed on Friday and I have to say Helen the waiting was truly the worst time for me... as scary as it was to hear the result I felt able to let the tense unknown thoughts go and now feel more positive ... I am sure I will sway in and out of lots of emotions. But once friday was over I felt relieved... the hardest thing for me has been telling family and close friends... its almost like saying it out loud means its real when it still feels a bit like it's not really happening.

I will be thinking of you tomorrow x

[Jo_BCC]

Hi Jonamo

Welcome to the BCC discussion forums, you've come to the right place for some good, honest support from the many informed users of this site.  While you are waiting for replies I have put for you below links to some of BCC's publications you might find helpful.  Also our helpline team are just a free phone call away to offer added support both emotionally and practically.  0808 800 6000 lines open Mon-Fri 9-5 and Sat 10-2.

http://www2.breastcancercare.org.uk/publications/diagnosed-breast-cancer/breast-cancer-you-diagnosis...

http://www2.breastcancercare.org.uk/publications/diagnosed-breast-cancer/resource-pack-primary-early...

Take care,

 Jo, Moderator

[Jonamo]

Hi, I am 42 and had a similar experience to you. I found a lump, my GP found 2, was referred and had needle biopsy, mammogram, ultrasound which looked suspicious and therefore 2 biopsies. The scan showed nothing in the nodes. That same day I got told to expect the worst as the needle biopsy and scans were not good. A week later I got my diagnosis of grade 2 IDC, ER+, PR+, HER- , tumours 8mm and 1.4mm. Because of small breast and multifocal tumours, mastectomy was my only option. I was offered immediate reconstruction on the basis that my SLNB came back clear. I had that op 10 days ago and sadly found out that the node they removed is full of cells and they expecting more! I no longer can have an immediate reconstruction. I will have mastectomy, full axillary node clearance on 1st November! followed by chemo! then radiotherapy and 5 years Tamoxifen. I will be able to have my reconstruction after the radiotherapy...
When you first find out it is an incredible shock, and it's ok to cry and be scared but at the end of the day we need to get on, it must be treated, and we can't let it beat us. I have 2 boys 6 and 8, and am blessed with a very supportive husband, family and friends. I have too much to live for. It is a roller coaster of a ride as there are so many hurdles to get through before you know exactly how they are going to treat you.
I find that being open about it helps. 2013 has been a rough year for my family, I have had to deal with my autoimmune disease (Ankylosing Spondylitis) which has only recently been settled down , after a bad reaction to anti-tnf medicine and then lost my mother on Easter Sunday and now this! I am hoping that is my lot!!

I hope you have good news and that they were wrong, I found the waiting the worst and most emotional. Fingers crossed for you.

Jonamo

[Guest user]

I agree. I am getting all my friends to feel the wee lump I have so they know what to look for. Although I am also saying that any change at all should be checked. I can't believe it's so small but so dangerous! I totally get now why awareness is so important. 

Here's whathappened to me. It's like fate that I found it.

Week after last I saw that Dawn O'P orter had on Twitter about a book she has edited called 'the Booby Trap' - it's contributions from different celebs - some real life stories about breast cancer, getting your first bra etc and a few short stories. I ordered a copy as profits go to breast cancer charities.

On Sat (a week ago today) I was going up to the shower when the book came through the letterbox. I sat down and flicked through the book instead of going to the shower. Dawn's bit in it was about how her mother died of breast cancer when she was 6. My 5 year old daughter was sitting with me and I really felt for Dawn as a child - her loss was massive. 

I went up to the shower still thinking about Dawn and my own daughters. And I checked my breasts. And there was a lump. I really thought it was just nothing - due my period, tenderness and lump boobs in general - that's me. But thinking about Dawn as a 6 year old prompted me to seemy GP on Monday anyway. My GP also said this is nothing but because I have a bit of a family history, get it checked out. And then got diagnosed on Tues night with breast cancer. 

After 24 hours of screaming vomiting and crying, survival instinct has kicked in.  I write comedy for a living and am glad to say I cracked my first joke today since finding out on Tuesday. Humour is going to get me through this, mentally,  I know it is.

Luckily, it's been caught very early. I dread to think how long it would have went undetected if I hadn't received that book through the letterbox on my way for a shower - or if I hadn't seen Dawn's post on Twitter about the book at all It all seems like someone was watching over me. 

I know someone who knows Dawn and asked for her email address - so I contacted her last night and told her the story. She emailed back a few times and we had a good old chat about it all. She's a genuinely lovely person. 

I'm feeling confident today that I can beat it. But deep inside I'm dreading chemotherapy (if it's suggested) and how it's going to effect my kids if I am very ill. 

One day at a time...

Have been reading all the posts since Weds and am amazed at everyones bravery and support to eachother. 

Leesa x

[helenstevo]

Thank you so much for all your replies, info & support. seems we are all going through the mill! I asked my doctor if i went private would things be done quicker but got told no. i also am a single parent to an 8yr old son. so i have to get better! I am antibiotics tosay as i have a chest infection, the doctor has also given me some light sleeping tablets. my phone has not stopped from concerned friends & family, i feel very loved & supported & for that i am very lucky. you ladies also are great. strong women! Just a couple more days to get through until monday! As soon as i am better i will be campaigning that women of all ages should be screened! Love & hugs to you all xxxx

[parky]

Hiya, have you talked to the helpline? 

Of course you aren't a wimp - it's so frightening isn't it?

The fear of the unknown is so powerful.  

Here's my timeline if it helps (although, hopefully, yours sounds like it might be quicker):

week 1: had biopsies and mammograms, ultrasound

week2: got diagnosis and had an extra biopsy told me maybe I could have a lumpectomy or mastectomy

week 3: got results from latest biopsy told mastectomy now best option but could have immediate reconstruction if I want. 

Like you I  considered a double mastectomy - but  surgeon won't take away my healthy breast.  so have  booked in for a mastectomy with reconstruction in 2 weeks time  and can't wait to have it done (although of course have my own fears).  Surgeon seems to think that slim chance of me needing radiotherapy, but if I do then still good odds that it'll be ok reconstruction-wise.  Even if it fails, then I'll be back to having a normal mastectomy scar for now, but can always have further reconstruction later if I still want it. 

Never thought three weeks ago that would feel like this, but here I am now trying to make the best and right pathway for myself, based on the info that is available at present.  Every case has similarities and differences though and until they and you get the definitive first sets of results back - you don't know whether you'll need a lumpectomy or mastectomy or what type of reconstruction might be best if you want one.  The important thing is to get shot of the nasty b*** though isn't it?   It's so , so  hard it really is we understand, we really do!

Let us know how you get on on Monday- evrything crossed for you.

Big hugs - P

[poemsgalore]

No offence taken Parky, I'm sorry if I gave that impression. I just wanted to let you both know that being scared is normal, for all of us. 

Helen, I'm sure you aren't a wimp, and that when push comes to shove, you will cope with whatever treatment you need. I think it's the unknown that we find scary. I think that if RADS  are offered, some are advised to wait for reconstruction until after  RADS are over. But as I haven't had a reconstruction, nor RADS, I can't really be sure.  But a word of advice, DR Google is full of old material and info that is quite frankly wrong. Please don't use it. Stick to this website and the  Macmillan site. 

There are several downloadable booklets on this website, full of helpful information. One such booklet is specifically for younger women. This is the link to  it:

http://www2.breastcancercare.org.uk/publications/diagnosed-breast-cancer/younger-women-breast-cancer...

Another useful booklet is here:

http://www2.breastcancercare.org.uk/sites/default/files/bcc44_bc_and_you_2010.pdf

Wishing you both well.

poemsgalore xx

[Guest user]

That is bad that you are left in limbo. I must say I found my lump on Saturday - went to the GP on Tues, she said probably nothing but referred me for a test. She said two week waiting list on NHS and I didn't want that hanging over me so I paid to go private - got the appointment the next day Weds. Got ultra sound scan doc told me nothing just tissue. Got needle biopsy and the cells were cancerous. The consutant told me there and then. That was on Weds. The same consultant also works in an NHS hosiptal so he told me to go on Thurs for a core biopsy mamogram and blood tests and booked me for an MRI on Tues coming. I also have an appointment to see him on Thurs for treatment plan. Everything has moved so fast - but still it feels like ages. So, I can sympathise with you that you have to wait for even a diagnosis. Luckily, I had a scan of my armpit and they say there is no nodes effected. The consultant said I have caught it very early and that's a good sign.  I am hoping it will be cured asap by maybe surgery and some other treatment besides chemo. I am 35 and a single mum of a 3 year old and a 5 year old so I HAVE to get better. 

I hope you get the results as soon as poss. xxx

[parky]

Poems - you most definitely are not old!

I totally agree age doesn't come into how scary it is, but I did want to show helen that there are many of us around her age too.  Sorry if I 'caused offence.

P

[helenstevo]

Thank you for your replies. its scary to see how many people this evil disease affects! I am dreading the treatment stage as i feel i am a right wimp. i think i hace read that if offered, if you just have lump removed & radiation if it ever returns & have to have mx tou cabt have them reconstructed after having rad. not sure if this is correct info? If it is i feel id orefer to have both removed with reconstruction to give peace of mind for the future. i would be paranoid in case it rerurns but ice been told it still can with a mx too!! Not sure nhs would remove a "good" breast though. sorry for the ramble! I am sat here googling & over thinking all sorts. in a way i cant wait to just know on monday! Hugs to you all xxx

[applestreet]

Hi ladies..sorry you have found yourself here in the club nobody wants to be a member of...I am 2 yrs post dx..grade 3 IDC..right Mx..ER+ PR+HER-..11 nodes removed..2 with cancer in them..went on to have Chemo..no rads and am now on tamoxifen for 5 yrs at least..the best advice I can give is to take one day at a time..just cope with each appt as they come along and listen to your body..if you need to rest..then do it..the treatment isn't easy but it is doable..Poems is right..age is no barrier..I was 52...here's hoping you will get to choose the "freedom" door but if not then take heart..this will pass and there is life afterwards..best wishes apple

[poemsgalore]

Hi helen,

Unlike you and Parky, I'm old (62) but I can relate to how you are both feeling. My experience (last October) was to have the triple assessment and biopsy on my lump, but then she found a lymph node that looked suspicious so she biopsied that too.

The outcome was that one week later I got my results. Ductal Invasive, ER positive and PR positive. I decided to have MX  and the final results were grade 3, three lymph nodes removed, one containing cancer cells. It could have been worse.  Age doesn't come into it when you are diagnosed with cancer, it's just as scary for we oldies as it is for younger women.

Sending big hugs and best wishes.

poemsgalore xx

[helenstevo]

Thank you. bless you, i hope all goes well for us both! Ive not had a definite yes as yet but been told i should def expect i have it. So this weekends going to be a long one! Keep in touch xx

[parky]

Hiya, what a shock that must have been - I feel for you so much!

I too am young (40) and like you and so many of us, I really felt that it would not be cancer - but unlike you, when I was ultrasounded and mammogrammed  I was told that it didn't look cancerous.  So...one week later (last week) I was so surprised and startled to be told that my lump is  invasive cancer. 

The first week since diagnosis has been really, really tough -a real emotional rollercoaster.   I've felt a bit detached from reality, but I have zoned in on the things that I can do and the questions that I think will help me understand my new situation and asked my breast care nurse (or if not there anybody else in her team).  Have you got a bc nurse yet?  When they've not been available, I have found the bcc helpline( in the post below) invaluable I really have.  No one is better at understanding or helping you with questions about your situation at the moment than those people or ladies like ourselves who have had a diagnosis.  I urge you to give them a ring today or tomorrow morning if possible. 

Talking and occasionally crying has really helped me over the past week and my emotions have settled a bit more.  Everyone on here seems to find waiting and the unknown the most anxious times.

You're not alone - we're here!

Please do get back in contact,

Gentle hugs,

P

[Janet_BCC]

Dear helenstevo,

Welcome to the forum.  I'm sorry to hear you are going through such a tough time.  I'm sure other members will soon notice your post and come along to offer some support.

You could also phone our Helpline for information and emotional support.  They are open from 9-5 on weekdays and 10-2 on Saturdays.  The number is 0808 800 6000

Very best wishes

Janet

BCC Moderator

[helenstevo]

So i found the lump 2 wks ago. i went to my doctor who said she thinks its nothing but sent me to the breast unit anyway. well i went wednesday, expecting it would be ultrasound (im 32) & alls fine off you go. how wrong was i. i then had a mammogram. then saw a consultant who told me they can see the mass that i found & also a shadow under my arm. he basically said we are very extremely concerned about this. i asked if he thought if it was cancer & the response was yes vut i hope i am wrong. i was then taken for biopsys (needle & core). I spoke to the lady doing these & she actually performed the ultrasound earlier that day. i asked if she thinks i have cancer. she said yes. she said as i have to wait until monday for the results etc i should prepare myself over the weekend for the worse. so i lnow i have it but keep thinking theres still a chance theyve got it wrong. i am so scared but doesnt feel like its really happening. so im on the waiting game til monday. im sure i have it, surely they wouldbt have gone as far as they did with their words on wednesday?! X