Norberte, I think you have a right to be cross, but please be cross in the right direction. I didn't say the aussie booklet was "really really really good" but it's a darn sight better than anything else I've seen (but that may be just because everything else is pretty useless). It's aimed at patients who have lots of different cancer effects to deal with, not just breast cancer, and at male and female patients, who I'm sure we can all acknowledge will have differing sexual needs. Oh, and it's also aimed at partners, friends and family. So I suppose "aimed" is a pretty poor choice of word on my part, seeing as it's taking a more blunderbuss approach than a targetted one and trying to hit everything. Yes, it misses detail for LBGT cancer sufferers, but it also misses detail for different racial or religious groups which may have different attitudes towards sex and sexuality - I am not qualified to make knowledgeable comment as I'm just a boring, ordinary hetty-betty who has led a very narrow life so far, so I'm sorry for not understanding in depth, I just haven't had the experience that would be needed for me to understand the way you do.
The point I tried to make was that while the aussie booklet has tried to give some practical pointers, the bigger problem is the medical professionals' attitude to women whose sexuality is affected by cancer, because it's just not seen as something that even needs to be discussed. And that group most certainly includes EVERY woman, not just straight women. You have a much more difficult time than us HBs, as you have often said, but that's for the very reason that sexuality is just not recognised. For anyone. So when you aren't run-of-the-mill-part-of-the-majority, you're treated like a alien. Please don't think that us poor HB goldfish don't acknowledge all the extra problems you have every day in being acknowledged and accepted, but we simply don't understand the difficulties as acutely as you do, because we haven't been subjected to them. But we can empathise as far as our limited understanding allows, because as women we have experienced a small degree of the same attitudes.
How would you improve the booklets, or would you just chuck them in the bin? Would you integrate lgbt pics and tips with heterosexual stuff or would you have sub-sections in the male and female sections? Would you include tips on how to talk to those in the medical profession? Would you create something for the medical profession to read so they can get an idea of what lgbt needs are? How could you try to ensure that they even get read? (It's usually the people who already know it all that need the most educating!)
As for this being a world where lgbt people are mostly invisible, I completely agree. But I don't know what I can do about that. There is almost always going to be a "default" position in just about anything. (The default is that the boss is male. The default is that people live in couples. And sometimes with children. The default is that people are heterosexual.) How should things that are NOT the default be dealt with?
Sorry, this has gone a bit off the topic but it’s something that does need to be discussed, I just don’t know where’s the best place.
I haven't yet got round to looking at the Birmingham one so I can't make any comment on it at all, so my comments are solely about the aussie booklet.
