I had Grade 3- 23mm so had a lumpectomy , only one node and that was negative. Have just had the first chemotherapy and herceptin and trying to cope with a couple of side effects! Have my wig and when my
son saw it he said I didn`t know you had a cat, Mum! Saw the doctor this morning as I had a rotten rash on the other boob which has turned out to be thrush. I think this boob is jealous of all the attention the
other one is getting! Finding eh forum and uplifting experience. One thends to think when first getting
the news that your the only one!! Big wake up call. Hope all you ladies are okay and coping too.
Take care. xxx
Hi shelly. Sorry to hear your dx. I've just popped over from the chemo july thread having had first session today (and feeling well so far). I remember being where you are at the end of May and the endless waiting is certainly worse than the treatment. I had a wle as well with 1 of 4 nodes infected, tripple negative so aggressive chemo is now underway. Just wanted to say that as soon as those results are in you will have a plan to focus on and can then make plans.
It is doable just be kind to yourself and remember to do as many of the exercises as you can. I did find swimming and yoga 2 weeks after the op really helped with flexibility and a lymph cord which was starting to develop.
Good luck with your results and on your journey to follow.
Sending gentle hugs. Hbunny
I felt exactly as you feel, and had a mastectomy last Thursday. I had thought very carefully about it and was very calm and certain about it and had the full support of my husband. I'd had 3 WLEs last time, on the other breast, but knew nothing about mastectomy - apart from the obvious! It all went extremely well, I've felt fine since my op, just very tired, and I'm looking forward to the next part of this journey. I don't yet know whether or not I will need chemo or rads, but will face those if and when; I'm on hormone treatment since a month before my op.
I wish you all the very best for Friday's results, when you will know just what you face, and hope that you'll have whatever op you decide on. Love and very gently hugs! Jo x
Hi flori, will be thinking of you on thursday, good luck and best wishes. Let me know how you are when you are ready, im sure you will feel much better after thursday. Take care of you and be kind to yourself. Hbunny xx
Hi hbunny - I hope all goes well at your oncology meeting on Thursday. I'll be under anaesthetic then while they have another attempt at getting rid of the darned mutants so won't be on the Forum for two or three days.
Shelly - I know just what you mean about knowing it's there and growing - the fear can be quite overwhelming. I try to drown out the thoughts with music but sometimes it's just not possible. At times I'm next to useless at work, particularly when there's so many other things going on, it makes it all harder to deal with. Good luck with your MRI results.
XXX to all.
Hi shelly. I know what you mean, its always the dreaded waiting, so much easier to cope with when something is happening. You will feel much more positive when th little **** has gone and you can concentrate on the next stage of making sure it doesnt come back.
How long have you got to wait for the ct results, will keep everything crossed for you. Take care and sending positive thoughts. Hbunny xx
Hi Flo, thank you so much for sharing your poem, it really struck a chord, which i had some creativity but not blessed. Trying not to think too much today just blocking it out. However have now got a day for oncology appt 19th june, so another week to suffer, actually thinking of doing this as a private consultation to bring it forward. More meditation needed!
Hope you are doing well flo. Love to you. Hbunny xx
I hope you had a better day today hbunny. And I hope things went well for you Jo, with your appointment.
The dreaded waiting. I don't know if you've seen the poetry thread from a while back. I posted a poem that I wrote during a time when I was a bit down and couldn't sleep and I kept thinking, if only we had an off switch so I could get some respite - and that was in my pre-cancer days. I need it even more now. I think it may strike a cord with you all:
Where’s the off switch?
Find a switch to turn off my brain
Before it drives me more insane.
A flaw I think in evolution
So tweak a gene and find a solution.
If there’s a God he didn’t plan
For one like me when creating man.
The off switch, which he sadly omitted
Draws me close to being committed.
If there’s a God what did he do?
He really didn’t think it through.
Perhaps a prototype he had in sight
And after me he’d get it right.
A manual override he should have inserted
Then all this torment he could have averted.
But then, I don’t believe in Him.
So to allocate blame – where to begin?
Sleep deprivation, I should say,
Led me to this right of way.
Not a path I’d choose to take
But was no choice that I could make.
Another night and still awake
Driving me mad, for pity’s sake
Let me sleep, or in the morning
I’ll be fit for nowt but just for yawning!
Only during troubled times
Does poetry then spring to mind.
At the edge of sanity creativeness
Keeps me awake and adds to stress.
I think the rhyme is running out
Just as well or I might shout
And ball and scream and throw a tantrum
Just from sheer exasperation.
I hope my reference to being a non-believer doesn't offend anyone. Love and hugs to all.
Good morning everybody,
Like Shelley, I had an MRI scan as my lobular cancer didn't show on other scans - often a feature of this sly type, I understand. Today's I have my appointment with the surgeon to discuss what will be done in my op tomorrow - unless there's another tumour hiding away, something he said might happen.
Hugs to you all and good luck. Jo x
Hi florie and sandie
Thank you both for your replies, that makes me feel much better. Think the waiting again is starting to get to me! Love to you both on this horrid journey, hopefully will feel better tomorrow and heres to a good nights kip for us all. Xx hbunny
Hi hbunny - I only had an MRI scan initially to decide whether a lumpectomy or mastectomy was the best course of action, even though I had a very swollen lymph node which was my first indication of a problem. After that I didn't have any other scans, despite being grade 3, 5 affected lymph nodes - one with extra nodal extension, lymphovascular invasion and being triple negative.
I think different NHS trusts just do things differently. I know someone in a different area who had various scans even though she wasn't as high risk for recurrence as me.
Hi, sorry to highjack this thread but just wondered if anyone knows the way decisions are made re whether to do scans or not? I have a ductal grade 3 triple neg with 1 nove and vascular involvement, but noone has ever suggested other scans might be needed, whats the criteria anyone know? Thanks for the help tried calling my bc nurse but no response! And love to all Hbunny xx
Sorry to hear you have joined our horrible club.
Like you, I lived in dread in getting breast cancer and sadly it came true for me on April 14th. I have a grade 3 ductal cancer too. Thanks for sharing what you know about this dreadful disease as makes us realise that it does have fantastic survival rates. Been told by my BCN that BC is no longer the death sentence is used to be however it is still a frightening diagnosis to receive.
Wish you all the best in your treatment xx
I was going to say the same, my GP gave me some sleeping pills. I still tend to wake up in the middle of the night, but now i go back to sleep instead of just laying there with my mind racing.
I have the zopiclones too, they send me to sleep which is marvellous! :-)
Definitely dont want to be on this journey, want to get off the ride now its sucks!
it is worth asking your GP for something to help you sleep......I take zopiclone........which doesn't knock me out but helps me relax and drift off to sleep.
Your appetite will return once you can focus........I didn't want to eat ...just sleep when I was first diagnosed.....its a tough time but honestly it does start to fall into place.....but allow yourself to feel like crap........we are all on a journey we don't want to be and we are used to taking out heal;th for granted....it's the sudden loss of control we all hate.
Sorry that you're struggling with the basics - sleeping and eating. I'm a bit ahead of you but can identify with what you're going through. Yesterday my picc line went in, ready for chemo on Wednesday. I have struggled to eat and sleep since my diagnosis. I wake before 4.30am every day. However, I get up, have a cup of tea, try some cereal and then get on with things that need doing! By 6.45 am I'm out walking a minimum of 4 miles every day (usually do about 7), come rain or shine. I find taking excersise and setting myself goals helps a great deal. I would start running again but my surgeon suggested sticking with walking until I get through chemo. I had surgery on 1 May and have been told I will require more following chemo. As to my appetite, its so difficult to enjoy food anymore, I eat to please my husband, children and friends. But I do know that I need to eat in order to be strong enough to carry on with the treatment ahead. I eat very small meals throughout the day, so maybe you could try eating little and often and see if that helps. I try to have something every 1-2 hours, even if its only a cracker! Also, before I go to bed (around 11.30ish) I go for a walk and when I get back have a relaxing bath and drink herbal tea. And I never use the internet after 8pm! I've no idea if this is of any help to you, but perhaps give it a try.
Take care, with my best wishes to you
It's the worst possible time for you........right now.
Wait until you have all the results and info available..........your onc will outline your treatment plan after gathering all the info. You'll feel much better then.
It's over 6 years since my dx, with a grade 3 tumour and 3 nodes involved..........had to have 24 nodes removed to check...........
It is a dreadful time......I planned my funeral.........thinking that 'this was it'..........but I'm here over 6 years later...........enjoying life..........different priorities (not a bad thing)...
You will get through this.............
I am sorry to hear of your diagnosis.
I am just about to have my 5th chemo session..........
I would say some things ......
1. don't google.......your journey is yours and you will read all sorts and worry yourself sick for no benefit...believe me I did that and I'm a nurse
2. focus one day at a time
3. accept that you will feel the depths of despair on some days.......and just want to curl up and shut out the world
4. once you have your treatment plan you will feel more positive as you commence your journey to your cure
5. The lovely ladies on here will help and support you alongside your multidisciplinary team
6. don't suffer anything in silence....as soon as you have a side effct ask for help (i.e..heartburn, constipation etc)
7.Know that you can get through this ......your mind will make if far worse than the treatment is......there is no pian during the chemo...and side effects are managed immediately
8. take any help anyone offers.
I know atthe moment this all seems a horrible dream.....but you will all get through this xxxx For me the worst side effect was loosing my hair
Sending you all best wishes xxxx Donna
As well as the support you are receiving here on the forums you might find it helpful to order the BCC resources pack. It has been specifically designed for those newly diagnosed and contains information to help you better understand your diagnosis, test results and the various treatments available. If you would like to order a copy just follow the link bellow:-
Also, if you need additional support do give the helpline a ring on 0808 800 6000. Here you can share your thoughts and concerns with someone who will offer you emotional support as well as practical information. Lines are open 9-5pm weekdays and and 10-2pm Saturdays.
Best wishes Sam, BCC Facilitator
So sorry to hear your news derkina.
I was diagnosed with BC on monday following mamograms and scans.... awaiting my biopsy results on tuesday to find out what type/grade. Two lumps were found. The consultant said that the larger one was definately sinister but waiting for the results of the biopsy to find out if the second one is too... in which case, my diagnosis could be very similar to yours.
It is terrifying... I had a major meltdown yesterday but feeling much calmer today. These things are very treatable these days.... just not very pleasant experiences to go through.