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here i go again

2 REPLIES 2
dolphinack
Member

Re: here i go again

i am due to go to the docs soon so she can check it again. she said the last time when i saw her that if it was still there when i came back to see her shed refer me to the clinic. its still there. just cant believe im going to have to go through all this again. waiting!

oldship
Member

Re: here i go again

Dolphinack
Same way as you - three years of tests and we can SEE the problem but not find it to do anything about it; see my post I have got to the point where i can barely tell my family that it is 'back' or 'changed again'.
I have been told that i am 'imagining myself into these symptoms' or that it is all a need for attention! If i wanted attention i would run round the middle of town stark naked and tie myself to railings outside a bank!
I was back at clinic yesterday and again same u/s showed clear (only did one small section and not where vascular mass was found previously).
You are not along - so if there are two already today imagine how many more there are of us going though this .... and for years and years ......
Just keep going to your appointment and know that they do not get you appointments in short time if they believe you are imagining it ...
This bunch have been here for me on and off now for three and half years - i just hope one day to get out of this waiting room as i have read all the mags, moved the chairs and seen friends come in and leave to a 'normal' life.
Good luck
Lxx

dolphinack
Member

here i go again

just when things were starting to get better from the last time ---- long story! but I am suffering from depression triggered { in part } i think by the implications of "waiting" on results from the last lump i had a few months ago ------ i found another lump. my GP has made me an appointment for Monday to check for any changes in it since I saw her a couple of weeks ago but its still there! it hasnt changed and i just know that i am going to have to go through the whole waiting thing again. this is now the third time in three years that this has happened to me. how many times can i keep on being "lucky" where its not BC? i,m not obssessive about checking for lumps, more the opposite but now that its there and i know its there i can feel the old feelings coming back. worry, stress, fear. panic attacks. sorry to rant but i feel that i need to tell someone how i feel as i have noone to talk to about it. my family have supported me through everything but i feel like the little boy in the story who cried wolf 3 times in a way as it has been ok before, but what if its not?