post mastectomy

[Sue C]

Nicki, where about are in you in the country?

[Sue C]

Hi Nicki

Starting a Moving Forward course next week as my active treatment is now over. Hope to get some emotional support there.

Do you have any friends or family to help? The first week after chemo is always challenging isn't it?

Sending a hug x

[Nicki roberts]

Thanks Sally sending you a big hug too...do any of you ladies meet up or go to any support groups? I'm pretty alone and feel I need more help. I start chemo next weds I'm hoping I'm not to ill with it this time. Thanks to all you beautiful ladies for getting back to me xxxx

[Sally-Ann]

Hi Nicki,

Just wanted to send a big hug xxxxxxx

[Ms Merton]

Hi Nicki - so sorry you are having to cope with all this without the support you need.  I really hope you can find a counsellor or support group near you where you can talk about your mum.  She was obviously a very special person.  I really have found yoga helpful in coping emotionally, I think because it includes some deep relaxation and meditation.  Sending all my best wishes and I hope you find someone to give you the love you so richly deserve.  Xx

[Nicki roberts]

Hi ms Merton. Thank you for reaching out to me. Yes I really do need some sort of therapy. However I have 18 weeks of chemo starting next week. I was really ill on the first lot. They are now going to change one of the drugs to see if I'm better with it? Just praying I am. Was in a mess with the first lot. I miss my mum so much..I need somewhere to go to talk her about her...I feel I have no one. Thanks again for reaching out. I feel getting sorted out emotionally is a must. I wish you all the best on your journey. Big hug xxxx

[Sue C]

Hi Nicki

I'm sorry I can't advise you on reconstruction. Speak to your BCN, they are always very good. Or the nurses on here. The only experience I've encounted is a family member who went through it and she seemed to have more trouble with the recon than the MX. But that was just her. Personally, the surgery part was the most traumatic bit for me, so if I needed a mastectomy, I wouldn't have had recon. Just wanted to be left alone! 

In regards to your hair....mine started to fall out about 3 weeks after chemo began.Resorted to scarves, as wigs were not for me. It's upsetting at the time(don't know why, it just is). However, I finished chemo in October of last year and approximately 4 months later its all back. Abit more curly than it was before and disappointingly, the greys have come back too! All I'm saying is that it seems awful at the time,but it will pass. 

Try to take one day at a time and then one treatment at a time, otherwise it all gets too much.

Sending a hug xx

[Nicki roberts]

Hey sue. Thanks for your reassuring reply. I should really come on her more and join in. I'm sure the support would help me. I know your 100% right. I can logically tell myself this stuff. However my mental and emotional, and now physical is all different. I hate having no flipping hair one boob and now hardly any use in my right arm. The pain literally is now driving me mad...I just want to well and back to me. I'm now thinking of asking to have my reconstruction now. They said they would do both breasts. I'm in pain so what's the difference? I should have had it done when I had mastectomy. What do you guys think?? Any advice? Or should I leave reconstruction until my chemo treatment is over? I have been told like you sue I'll be put on hormone drug for thr rest of my life. After 18 weeks of chemotherapy which starts next week. Thank so much for reaching out. Please let me know how mammogram goes next month..big cyber hugs to you xxxxxx

[Ms Merton]

Hi Nicki.  I am sorry that you are in so much pain and distress. I had a mx two weeks ago and cannot move my arm etc.  It is v painful!  You are obviously suffering deeply from your recent bereavement and the mx is another kind of deep loss too.  Unfortunately the chemo also messes with your emotions a lot making you feel fragile.  Please could I urge you to see your GP as soon as possible and ask for an urgent referral for counselling.  It might also help to try some anti-depressants, esp. to counteract the side effects of the chemo on your mental state - worth asking your oncologist? You could also look for bereavement and cancer support groups in your area or a breast cancer support centre such as The Haven. Another way that many people find effective for reducing both physical pain and emotional distress is deep relaxation techniques such as meditation, yoga, hypnotherapy, reflexology.  Your GP or BCN may be able to get you a referral for this type of complementary therapy or there may be yoga classes available near you. I really think it might help with the IBS, back pain and fatigue.  Or you could do what I did when I started chemo, which was get two cats ....! Some days you just need to scream and cry. Hope you feel in less pain soon.  Take care. 

[Sue C]

Nicki

It's still early days for you , so mentally it will be really tough. Trust in the doctors, they know what they're doing. You will naturally be feeling a lot of pain with all the surgery that you've been through.

I didn't have to go through such tough surgery as you, but I did have grade 3 cancer, so have been through chemo and rads. I finished active treatment at the end of last year and am now on hormone therapy ( zoladex and letrozole). First mammogram next month. Have been through some difficult times over the last year but feel like I'm coming out the other side.

Give yourself time and look after yourself xx

[Nicki roberts]

Thanks so much sue. I also had lymphnodes removed. I have pain in my ribs and also get breathless. It's so scary as all that keeps going through my mind is say they got it wrong and I still have C..The rib pain only came on me a week ago. I've read other women have had this too.

I hope your ok? And wish you lots of well wishes. I'm glad I got the all clear. However I haven't got the all clear mentally. It's still all there in my mind.
😞
Thanks for reading my post and reaching out.u h appreciate the irtue hug xxx

[Sue C]

Hi Nicki

I've just read your post and I can't comment on your treatment, as just had a lumpectomy, but I just wanted to send you a virtual hug .

Sue xx

[Nicki roberts]

Hi everyone I've been reading posts on reconstruction after mastectomy and thr pain alot of women are suffering. I had a mastectomy on my right breast. I decided to have reconstruction after my treatment. As I still have to have 18 weeks of chemo even though I'm cancer free. The tumour in my breast hadn't spread..Yay so happy. So after the mop up treatment as my surgeon calls it I've decided to go for recon then.

I had my mesectomy 5 weeks ago. I'm in so much pain. My chest wall, armpit, shoulder and right arm are numb, sensitive and the pain if I just touch it I get a sick reflex from it where the pain is so bad I feel a horrible sick feeling. I'm on oral morph gabapentine codeine and still in loads of pain. I like a hard lump in my chest wall and a hardish lump in my armpit. It's so tender and sensitive. I can no way wear a bra..even the ones the hospital gave me. I have to wear lose tops as when cloths touch it..it seems to get really sore. I already suffer with chronic fatigue and arthitis, soriousis, ibs and lower back pain which literally when I wake in the morning I cry with the pain..I'm in pain everywhere I'm 45 and feel so fed up with all of this...anyway I just wanted to say that I feel I have server nerve damage and I think when they op they cut through alot of nerves. It sounds like my pain in chest wall etc is the same as the women who have had there reconstruction whilst having there mastectomy. So maybe it's nothing to do with the reconstruction? Because there is also a thing that alot of women get and it's called post mastectomy pain. Sharp pain in chest wall and armpit. Numb sensation and burning.

I'm so scared this sensation isn't going to go away I spoke to a lady who had a mastectomy 10 years ago and she is still suffering with aches and pains around the area. I'm also gutted I didn't have my reconstruction. I thought doing that would cause pain etc. However it doesn't seem any different. So now I've got to go all through it again.

I lost my mum last August. I'm missing her terribly. That's a different kind of pain. That's a deep ache for a person who was my everything. I got diagnosed 3 months after she died. I cared for my mum for 4 years. She had dementia. I was pretty burnt put and developed chronic fatigue. Then this. I keep going and I have been strong. However I feel like I just want to vent and scream today..I've hardly had any support..I've don't speak to my family. Even with cancer they still don't know how to do the right thing. That's emotionally a betrayal pain. All this pain. On top of that I'm constipated lol
Thanks for listening to me...sorry I'm just so done and I'm so so fed up and just miss my mum so so much...god bless everyone

Nicki xxxx