starting chemo July 2014

[wend63]

Hopefully fiona you will be ok all you must remember is to check your temperature and if you feel unwell tell someone . I'm sure you Will be fine . The anger I think comes and goes x

[kare28]

Hi fiona im sorry to hear i hope you have people around you to support you with your son. i can only imagine how hard it is but youve come this far and im sure u'll deal with it. I feel so lost and lonely lost my mum in march and i dont know what to do with myself. im 29, no kids and never been married. im thinking of skipping the treatment and seeing what happens. everyones life seem to go on and the more im around them the more i resent everyone.

[Fiona00]

Hi wend I am quite struggling with my young son but it is life and now he having a flu and I am so panicking that I would pick the virus up. Kare, I did have some anger towards my friends and family once I knew that I had go through all these, but when time past, u will absorb it and accept it as a part of your life. Even now I sometimes still feel so lonely as no one close to me can understand my feeling, but we still need to be strong and carry on.

[wend63]

I feel so angry too I think maybe it is part of the whole process . I had a hard time a few weeks ago thinking my single friend was trying to step into my life and how could my hubby want to be with me not her . This has now passed thank god but this is all so hard as it strips you of all your femininity xx

[kare28]

Sorry new this i accidentally posted the wrong thing. Thank you ladies for all your replies it brings comfort to know that i have others that understand and can share with. I dont know whats happening to me i have so much anger and resentment towards my friends and collegues especially when i see them laughing away just reminds me what im missing. i have decided to just keep myself to myself im i being selfish or unresonable.

How is everyone doing

[kare28]

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@wend63 wrote:
I am due to start chemo on 18th July 2014 . I am having 6 sessions of fec . Has anyone else had experience of chemotherapy in new cross hospital . Also has anyone had experience of using cold cap

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[wend63]

Hi fiona glad you got through the night ok. Gosh it must be hard with a 5 yr old have you got lots of help . I've woken up this morning absolutely exhausted even though I've slept . I've had a couple of hot flushes in the night my poor hubby has to cope with fan on and then off bed clothes on then off . Think he's exhausted too lol xx

[Fiona00]

Oh i still not very good at using the arm at my operation side, worried if I will have problem with other arm if I have the picc

[Angiebun]

Oh and got some funny looks in Sainsburys as had a vest top on yesterday!

[Angiebun]

Hi Fiona been told to use my arm normally to help prevent blood clots no real issues with movement other than the danglly bit getting in the way a bit. Sore m stingy though. X

[Fiona00]

I went to sleep @10pm last night as my nausea became worse, but when I woke up in the very early morning, nausea was completely gone, instead I had some mild tummy pain.

[Fiona00]

Wend and angie you are so lucky to have grown up kids. I am 33, and my son only 5, I still need to entertain him while I am on treatment...I actually went back to work 2 days per week in between my surgeries and chemo, and if I am well enough during chemo I will back to work for a few days as well, try to help the boss out when I can

[Fiona00]

Hi angie how you feel about picc line can you move your affected arm? Can you lift things with that arm?

[Angiebun]

Kids are 16 to 30...would have been very quick work otherwise lol!

[wend63]

Hi angie just realised we haven't said anything about ourselves have we . I also have 5 kids aged 15 - 33 , 2 grandchildren and one due in January which I want to be well enough to see . I have a husband of 14 years and a dog which helps me no end . I'm not able to work during my chemo as I work on a very busy veterinary reception . Doctor feels risk of infection is too high . Miss being at work but am in constant touch with everyone . I too want to beat this .

[Angiebun]

Hi Fiona, Wend and Kare28. Didn't realise it was early for PICC to go in! Bit better today I think the dressing was a bit tight. Kare28 please share your trouble don't try and do this alone! I am a very strong person but this has torn me to pieces. Tell me a bit about yourself? I have 5 children aged 26 to 30, 2 grandchildren, three dogs and a lovely partner and I intend beating my cancer! I am still working but it is really hard as I work with people with very challenging behaviour who can be very verbally and physically aggressive but my work is my sanity at the moment I have two days booked of for when my chemo starts on Thursday and fortunately don't work weekends so hoping I will be ok to go back on Monday. ..best laid plans and all! Glad Fiona and Wend not suffering too much but please keep posting it feels really good to share with you guys xx

[wend63]

I have been very lucky I have been off work since May and my employer has been nothing but supportive I hope you find the same x

[Fiona00]

Hi kare28, u really need to tell people around you about ur treatment, I think talking to people does help a lot and I had the same worry about employment as we'll I was so so frustrating to decide if I need to tell my boss or not. But I did and they are very supportive so far, I didn't need to provide any letter but if they do ask, it should be easy for the cancer centre to provide it with no problem at all. And if u tell ur employer and their reaction is not as positive as it should be , I dun think u will be bothered to work with them when u recovered. Hope u doing well with ur treatment and your life. Xx

[wend63]

Hi kare I'm sorry you are going through this alone . I know that you do not have to tell your employer but really I found it helped you may have days where you need to be off work and may need the support . Perhaps you could speak to Mcmillan support work advisor .

[June_BCC]

Hello Kare28

Welcome to the forums, this must be very difficult time for you.  I’m sure other users will be along to support you soon. 

In the meantime, maybe you would like to talk things through with a member of our helpline staff who are there to offer practical information as well as emotional support. The free phone number is 0808 800 6000 and the lines are open Monday to Friday 9.00 to 5.00 and Saturday 10.00 to 2.00.

Best wishes

June, moderator

[Fiona00]

At today'dinner all food tastes sweet and I had to add some vinegar in to make them more tasty. And I started a bit nausea.but I was non stop sipping lemon water since and tried to eat normal

[wend63]

Yes at least having it so close together we will have something to compare too . Make sure you drink plenty and eat well x

[kare28]

Due to start chemo on friday havent told anyone and dont know whether to?

[Fiona00]

Think aching is the standard, I already feel tiny bit bone aching in my legs x wend hope u coping well in the following days.xxx I will try to update every day condition here

[wend63]

I had the tiredness and legs aching think that must be standard . I was lucky my veins were good hope they stay that way . I'm tired today have had sore eyes also my hands and feet are sore on the bottoms but if this is the worse it gets I can cope x

[kare28]

please help starting my first treatment on friday and my mind has just gone blank, i havent told anyone and have no idea what to expect. do i have to tell my employer and if so do i need to provide hospital letters?

[Fiona00]

Oh plus a bit tiredness when I got home. Legs are a bit restless now

[Fiona00]

Hi wend, first one done, so far so good (touch wood),no sickness, no pain, just a bit lightheaded when the drug went in to my body and bit wobble and dizzy afterwards. Will see how it goes when the sickness drug off, fingers cross. But I had difficulty at finding veins as my veins were too small and got lots pain and pressure along the arm when having the drugs. My chemo nurse dun think my veins will stay good enough towards the end as I only can use one arm, So I was booked to have a picc line in on 7th August. How is everything with u today? Xxx

[wend63]

Hi fiona hope it was too bad today thinking of you x

[wend63]

Hi find thinking of you this morning sending a hug x

[Fiona00]

Hi Angie why u had picc so early?

[wend63]

Dear angiebun sorry your picc line is so uncomfortable hope it settles down . I understand how you feel about the infections it's even more scary when you have had problems before the chemo cause I think they scare you telling you everything could be life threatening . Try to stay positive and focused and hopefully we will all support each other x

[Angiebun]

Thanks f

or the good wishes.PICC now in but very uncomfortable, blood tests tomorrow. Still got some dental pain but dentist says all ok so looks like me n FEC have a date on Thursday. Really worried about infections...no, actually petrified roll on November! Hope you gals are all ok?? 

[wend63]

Not so far that was my real worry but felt a bit sick on first day but not very bad . x

[Fiona00]

Thanks wend. U not suffering any sickness so far?

[wend63]

Not as bad I meant to put I've found my brain is a bit slow after this chemo lol x

[wend63]

That is pretty much the same as me really all seems very daunting but it really was bad as I expected . All I think is its necessary . My treatment took 2 hours and then it was done . Are you taking someone with you . They told me fec was a hair loss drug too at least with me being a few days in front I can try and give you some warning . Will be thinking of you tomorrow x

[Fiona00]

I went to the pre chemo today, went through some questions and did a blood test and ECG and will start the rock and roll tomorrow @9:30! I didn't request cold cap and was told fec is a definite hair loss drug...

[wend63]

Good luck fiona and angiebun thinking of you both today xx

[CathC]

Fiona and Angiebun
, wishing you both lots of luck today.
Hugs

Cath

[Angiebun]

You and me both at the hospital tomorrow then Fiona..pick line going in, all feeling scarily real now.

[wend63]

Let me know how you get on I will be thinking of you x

[Fiona00]

Hi wend tomorrow I will go for my pre chemo appointment, looking forward to visit the posh private hospital at which I am going to have chemo

[wend63]

Fiona I totally understand how you feeling I will be thinking of you xx

[Fiona00]

Angie. Will update my condition here

[Angiebun]

Hi Fionna00
HER2+ and a lump that is starting to be quite sore. Looks like your going to be a couple if days ahead of me treatment wise. I do hope all goes well...Definitely know how your feeling!

[Fiona00]

Hi Angie my cancer cells are grade3 as well with er+ her2-,how nasty is yours

[Fiona00]

Thanks cath , just dun want Tuesday come

[Angiebun]

Hi

I am due to have the 1st of 6 FEC treatments on Thursday for a grade 3 lump. Just had two teeth out and still have a very sore mouth/infection? so worried they may have  to delay...just want to get started now as lump is big at 5cm although ultrasound detects 28mm. Scared about prognosis longer term as appears I have a nasty invasive cancer. On the plus side NAD in nodes as yet. Feeling tired (sleepy) all the time but unsure why...

[CathC]

Fiona, wanted to wish you luck.

Hugs

Cath