Hello everybody....knackered, worn out, deliriously happy woman here! Wedding was the most perfect day ever....nothing went wrong, everyone had an amazing time and the sun even shone! I was spotted dancing the night away to Dreadzone, Beatles, etc and i am almost lost for words over how amazing it all was....
Day before we were all working like trojans getting the reception ready....it was at grooms dads....17th century manor house with just incredible barns and grounds! sinks were being plumbed in and flowers....oh the flowers! All from the local fields and hedges and some from covent garden....cow parsley everywhere! Beautiful lace paper bunting decked the walls with swallows swooping in and out to nests! Tables consisted of 4 huge tresles seating 30 on each....very Thomas Hardy! the chairs had been borrowed from several village halls as had the eclectic mix of plates! Each place setting had a linen napkin with hand printed name tag. The dance barn had a bar with a selection of local beers ciders and wines, I made lemonade all afternoon....sooooo many lemons to squeeze! The music was all set up and ready to go...
We all swept and cleaned and moved stuff.....lamps were hung all around the gardwn and pond....and around the incredible infinity pool (a swimming pool that looks like it has no edge but drops away!) 50 oil lamps were prepared for guests to light their way back to their cars in the night....the carpark field was about half a mile up a tiny dark lane!
I set off to collect the pig for the hog roast from the abattoir (it was raised at my friends farm) now getting a 70kg dead trussed pig complete with head etc into a small hatch back was interesting but we managed and covered with a sheet it was transported to the hog roast farm from where it would magically appear at the wedding.
We then went to the church for the rehersals.....Oh wow oh wow....small church in middle of field with flowers to make me cry...
Exhausted all the family, extended family and loads of friends decended into the local pub!.....where we has a glorious pre wedding evening!
Saturday dawned and I got to the beautiful guest house where my daughters (bride and cheif bridesmaid) spent the night....we all got dressed up, made up and drank lots of champagne....for the nerves ...! The photographer was there all the time taking shots all through...cannot remember her name but she is one of britains top female photographers....she was so lovely and casual!
Off we went to the wedding....and when I got there it was amazing and my lovely husband was waiting looking very dapper in his posh suit and winged collar...and all my kids looked amazing....!
The wedding went in a blur....beautiful....what more can I say...
We went out and after a bit the bride and groom drove off to the reception in and antique (1950s) open top sports car.....
Reception went really well....Everyone had a ball and I am now home a proud and happy mummy! After all the crap we have been through over the last 18 months we deserved an amazing day and we got it!
They are now off on their honeymoon on the island where the film Mama Mia was filmed!
All the pics will be on FB and I will put a link to a few other places when they are up so you can be nosey!!!
Hi girls. Just in the subject if the organic milk. I read that cows who are grass fed have more omega 3 which us supposed to be good. I read a book called The anti cancer diet many months ago when I was in a chemo fog. Think it's buried under the bed so I have to dig it out.
Oops, no I meant into the cow.. not the milk direct, lol! LiF would be the person to double check with on this, but I'm pretty certain that our milk is ok 🙂
Ttip, it wasn't hormones being pumped into the milk, it was oestrogen being pumped into the cows to make them produce milk. I know that in Europe (unlike the US)farmers aren't allowed to inject hormones into beef cattle. It was someone at the hospital said about it - I think the reflexologist but it could have been the psychologist.
The psychologist said 4 weeks after RADs was too soon to go back to work. I'll get my GP's opinion tomorrow. Definitely think it'd be too much going back to 2 jobs, so your idea of going back to day job first is probably v sensible.
I'm looking at going back to work in a few weeks time, and all of a sudden I'm thinking, hmmm, can I get another sick note for just a couple of weeks? I'm feeling so much better now, that it would be really nice to just get on and sort the house out....lol. Also, eldest dd is doing work experience the last two weeks in June, which might make getting to my evening job tricky when I've only just started back.. (eldest dd or eldest ds look after the little 'uns when I work evenings, if OH's shift means he's not at home)... eldest ds 'might' be around, but we're hoping he's got an apprenticeship as a chef, so I sort of hope he'll be working too. Just taking an extra couple of weeks 'sick'.... hmmm. May have to look into it. Maybe I could just pass the sick note on to the evening job, and still do the day job, sort of 'ease myself' back in to the whole work situation?
That's sounding better and better the more I think about it......
Nottsgal... forget the 'organic' milk thing.. that's advice from someone who hasn't really done their research (one of the reasons I do tend to avoid the food debates, as it is so difficult to weed out fact from fiction, quite apart from how upset everyone gets, and I really can't be a*sed with that). I had this conversation with LiF about hormones being pumped into milk, and it is not something that happens over here in the UK. I think it may well do in the US (which is where a lot of the diet research we hear about here comes from), but it is NOT an issue over here.
By all means go 'organic'.. but don't do it out of concern for being hormone +. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
It seems strange that we are all contemplating going back to work. I have done my second week at work. I am doing 3 days aweek from 10 to 4. I have been really tired at the end of each day but enjoying it. I am now glad to have gone back to a new job. I went back 5 weeks after RADS
Had Onc follow up yesterday and all seems ok except that I need a bone scan due to back ache. Appt will follow shortly. Am a little worried about this but they do not think it is anything to be concerned about.
Kaz - hope your mum is OK after her cemo. I have also put weight on but oncs do not want me to diet as yet. Also been told I can walk but no strenuous exercise.
Lif - hope all went well and you and your daughter had a fabulous day.
Reeb - I had occ health appt before RADs had finished. Dr advised that I stay home until Sept and then return on phased return but the OCC health Co told me that I was capable of 2 full days a week straight away!! They ignored the doctor. Hope you get a better report and you can stay at home a little longer.
Re teeth - yes I have a tooth that is very loose keep thinking it is going to drop out and that part of my gum is painful. Haven't been to the dentist yet. Hoping that now I have finished chemo it will tighten up.
Hi girls. Hope all are ok. Have been reading but not posting much.
Hope the day goes well for Lif and her daughter.
Claire hope u had a good time in France.
Had reassessment as previously reported and was going to ask that if they had a cancellation could I be seen earlier. Nurse phoned Thurs and said i had a urine infection. Was just starting to get a bit of pain in my side and had a bad back. Was about to go and buy new bed! Anyway on antibiotics now for a week.
Anyone had problems with teeth after the chemo. My gums are sort of aching. Expect my teeth will drop out next!
Have a gd weekend all.
just to say I have taken the plunge & am all booked for brum in Nov - 6 months is a way off but I know if I don't do it I will forget or find a reason not to so thought better do it now!!!!
I'm interested in the reconstruction session & relaxation. They have very kindly offered for me to stay on the Fri night as well as sat as I am coming from sussex but I have offered to pay as they are a charity after all. I just want it all organised for me!!!!
Hope some others can go too but am sure it will be great either way
XXXXXXXXXXXX jo XXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Reeb, my muscles still ache a bit, but they are improving slowly. Sounds as if you're suffering more, hope things improve soon.
My eyelashes were weird - remaining half fell out about a fortnight ago, but seem to have loads of short ones growing through already - think old ones must have loosened and new ones pushed them out.
Eyebrows now very short, unfortunately now having to use tweezers for the rogue chin hairs.
Last rad today - they have just rung to say machine has broken down, another is on service. They will ring later with another appointment, for one of the other two machines, later in the day.
Nottsgal - hope you find a forum to go to.
LiF - hope all goes well tomorrow.
LiF, have a fab day tomorrow, may the sun shine on your feather boa thingy.
Milly, I want to go on a younger women's forum too as they have a session on reconstruction. I was thinking either Bristol (Sept) or Birmingham in Nov. If you're going to Birmingham, let me know and I'll go to that one too. TN is a good thing surely? you don't have to bothered about which foods, cosmetics etc are phyto oestrogenic. Someone told me to buy organic milk because the regular version comes from cows that are injected with oestrogen to keep them producing. I don't so much object to paying the extra for organic milk but why the frig can't they make the 4 pint bottles? Most places only have 1 pint bottles - bigger supermarkets sometimes have 1 litre.
Reeb, congrats on eyelashes - even if they're irritating your eye. I had to get the tweezers to my unruly growing eye brows yesterday.
Have a good day all
LiF - have a fantastic day tomorrow. Hope it all goes well.
Stella - do your legs still ache? Mine are still terrible.
Spent ages yesterday trying to locate and remove some grit from my eye to eventually discover that it wasn't grit but an eyelash sticking in my eye. Didn't realise they had grown!
Take care all
just posted in BCC on facebook - I want to go to younger women's forum & can't do london dates as am at centreparcs so am planning to go to birmingham one as is fairly easy to get to.
has anyone been to one or would anyone of the 45 and under group (I JUST squeeze in) be interested in going - I will anyway but would be lovely to meet people as I can't make York - am gutted about that actually.
on another subject Rob spoke to my ONC today as I asked about doing REACT & he is advising against as apparently there are risks to your heart which is why surrey withdrew from the trials apparently so am having a meet with him to discuss but think if he doesn't recommend then perhaps too big a risk on the drug for possible but as yet unproven benefits. I think I just wanted to feelk I was doing something active as I have no more treatment as TN?!?!?
xx left laptop at andys, !! durr. .
lif, have a fab time at the wedding. cant wait to see pics.
claire , enjoy france
hugs to all others
right then ladies, whole of the bnb is booked for us , 12 peoples.
ive had deposits off 6 people. . val, pam, jannette, claire, reeb and kerry. . thanx all. xxx
who else is comming. xxxx
on the sunday we leave to come hoke im, catching a train up to berwick upon somewhere, and on the monday i start my 6 day walking treck, of 100 miles over the st oswalds way.
off to edinbugh tommorow, andys doing the marathon sunday.
ive been piling on the weight!! so now ive 2 months off work, i intend to get fit, and get walking.
flushes still happening, and dont sleep well of a nite.
mom started her cemo yesterday, all day then next wed and wed after an hours, then the cycle happens again
love to all, and missed you all xx
Have a lovely holiday Claire, You deserve it. Hope your son enjoys his trip too.
Bon voyage. Stella xx
LIF - hair sounds good!
Kerry- sorting kids clothes nows that's a real chore - take your time, i know what it is like bags and piles of stuff everwhere
stella - pleased hair growing quick
notts gal - it must be a bit of a strange feeling finishing rads having been to hospital every day.
i'm off to France in a bit - just sorted out last few things. cant believe i am going really and feels very strange going without the kids. my son been to hospital today and fingers crossed will have his cast off next wednesday, - he due to go to italy on a school trip a few days later so there is a bit of glimmer of hope that he may be able to go - it would be so nice for him to go after the horrid time we have been having.
bye for now. hugs to all
Thanks Trip and LiF but I'm not amazing, just used common sense. Sometimes we need to be more like men - e.g. I'm sure LiF's current hubby didn't demand that he should be the one to give away his stepdaughter. Men are more logical. The other thing is, I didn't have to speak to my husband's ex - only ever have once 9 years ago. At the daughter's wedding (2006) I had in my head that when I got to her on the receving line I would say something about how beautiful all of her daughters looked (other 2 were bridesmaids) but before it got to that, I was told by one of daughters that her mother did not wish to shake hands with or speak to me and that I should walk straight past her when going along the receiving line.
As for your make-up LiF, if you start doing yours (with hand mirror if necessary) while ex's husband is doing one of your daughter's (even if you don't wear much you can wave around some of your LGFB products and apply bits of them), then when she's finished your daughters, you can say "oh don't worry about me, I did my make up, while you were doing daughtername". Most important thing is to enjoy the day, rise above it all. If you can cope with FEC and TAX, which are very unpleasant, you can cope with the dopey bag who your ex married.
Claire - have a great time in France.
hugs to everyone - I don't know if you're all like me, feeling weird that RADs have finished but don't feel normal again yet.
Lif - can only back up what the others have said - it's YOUR daughters wedding:))) You are the mother of the bride, no one can take that away from you. Bet you rock those feathers and purple hair:))))))))))))
Claire - enjoy france. big hugs xxxxxx
Today i will be mainly sorting kids clothes out, they will insist on growing:) Its all go here!!!!
Had pre- op yesterday, she took blood and my arm still aches, 'oooo, thats gone a bit deep' she said. I got weighed too, not good:(
Hugs to all.
Thanks guys for the kind words...Jo...it does sound funny, bit like an Ealing comedy! Notts...you are amazing and ought to give lessons to silly moos like this,...what you did at sd wedding was perfect......and I like the idea of setting the sheep shears on her roflmao!!!!!
My hair is about 2cm all over and looks ok lengthwise, I'm wearing a hairband with a feathery thingy in it...all very 20s outfit is a bit wacky but then I'm not your normal run of the mill person!!! I'm also having purple edged hair and the kids love it!
Will post some pics on something you can all access next week so you can have a giggle!!
Meanwhile hope everyone is ok and chugging on....how many of us and who are going to york.....really looking forward to that!
LIF- i have all this to come potentially as my OH hooked up with someone else. try n enjoy regardless.
after what my GP said last week about recovery time from all this, i don't want to push myself to going back too soon (even though i could do use doing so financially) - i am v v wobbly and just dont think i could go back until i am certain i willl not cry at the drop of a hat - its really weird the thought of going back to something/people that filled your days but many of us havent heard a peep from them for months - how can we go back to them when they havent been part of a really big part of our lives?
off to france tomorrow - packed and unpacked and repacked again!!
my son did go to school again today - with a little more enthusiasm thankfully.
hugs to all
LiF - I really hope you all have a fabulous day and that ex's wife does not spoil it for you.
We are all looking forward to some pictures please.
Is your hair long enough to do something with. I guess it might be - you're a few weeks ahead of me - mine is between half a centimetre and two centimetres and a bit patchy.
Good luck to you and your daughter - you deserve it.
LiF - I'm sorry but your post made me LOL. I do hope someone is videoing. seriously though she is NOT in any way important on YOUR daughter's wedding day - your daughter is & what she wants is important & YES YOU are MOB - stooooopid woman (her not you!!!!!!)
I hope you all survive & manage to enjoy it all even with that added stress.
XXX jo XXX
Lif - can't believe it's come round so quick! I'd certainly suggest you take Nottsgal's advice about the alternative plans and Trips suggestion re the make up and the beer. Be yourself, you're beautiful as you are and your daughter will be so proud of you.
Nottsgal, you are the living exception to the rule of step-mothers being evil witches... or variant spellings of such - good for you for being so grown up about it all, and I'm sure your 'step kids' appreciate you all the more for it.
LiF - breathe in, breathe out etc etc etc etc. And make sure someone captures her expression on film as she is ushered to a table in the back of the barn.....
You are the mother of the bride, and a formidable, fabulous m.o.b at that... with a stunning, gorgeous head, looking so well and so brave - I expect the ex's new missus is quaking in her boots every time she meets you. Don't let her do your make-up... would you trust yourself to do a good job on her face?? MAKE-UP, I mean..lmao... Val, you don't need make-up to look stunning, and you want to be comfortable - I can't think of any faster way to upsetting yourself than to have her deciding how you should appear....
Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out. Repeat as necessary. Then drink lots of beer.
OK LiF, some re-ordering of your story needed. How about sheep shearers come to sort out ex's wife? or you could take ex's wife to hog roast people? but her make-up would run if they put her on a spit. With 2 barns for reception, can she not be put in one and the door locked?
Speaking as a step-mum of already adult women, I consider myself their father's wife and only use the term stepdaughters to other people (and then for convenience) - not to the girls themselves. At the oldest one's wedding, I sat a few rows back with other family members while hubby sat at the front and did the giving away bit. He then stood in the reception receiving line and sat at the top table. I sat with his sister etc. A daughter's wedding is a big day for the mother but if, like me, you come on the scene when they're already grown up, you can't expect any role. In fact, my only role was paying towards SD's wedding as hubby couldn't afford it at the time.
Countdown to wedding on Saturday...yikes! Have all clothes sorted, b&b sorted .....have to collect dead pig (!!!!!) from abattoir on Thursday afternoon and deliver it to the hog roast people. Sheep shearers have decided Thursday morning looks dry weatherwise so are coming then....collecting 160 bread rolls from bakery near wedding Friday morning.....then helping decorate reception venue...2 old barns! Have to go out with the extended family of bride and groom on Friday night including my ex and his irritating wife.....help!
Saturday am meeting bride daughter and other daughter to get ready together....but oh....irritating wife of ex coming too....she is sorting out make up for my daughters...who don't wear it...and herself who does and needs to! And me....though I don't want any....nervous breakdown or murder most foul approaching I think!
At church....who sits where.....she wants to be mother of bride.....but isnt...I am....she will sob all through...oh whoops make up will run....!
......and we havent even got as far as the reception....
Not sure how long I will be able to resist being rude to her....she means well but its my daughter who is getting married and my daughter who has had a shitty 18 months with this crap and watching me get it too....step mum has only been on the scene for a few years and of course has done the blimmin silly comments like....oh well its nice you are both cured now and I had a lump removed so I know how you both feel....hers was small cyst!!!
.......may need an escape plan or a tunnel out of the church!
Sorry to rant but its like a black comedy!
Reeb - Hope it stays warm and dry while the windows are being done.
Polly - hope all goes well with the op.
Claire , it's a big plus if your son goes to school - it's better for both of you.
Can you get a few people to take you to rads a couple of times each - or ask about hospital transport. I've found rads easy to cope with and have gone on the bus - we have a bus that goes along the motorway and stops outside the hospital so I'm lucky there. I've sometimes driven myself, but parking is a hassle and you have to allow loads of extra time to queue up to get on the car park.
Booster rads are concentrated on the scar area instead of the whole breast area - my clear margins were not quite clear.
Kerry, don't think anything helps with hot flushes except layers and a fan. HRT of course, but that is a no-no for most of us now. Not looking forward to Arimidex making them worse.
Nottsgal and Millykins - don't go back to work too soon and make sure it's phased.
Only three more rads to go.
Having new windows fitted so the dogs and I are confined to the conservatory for the next few days.
Sophie - what sort of bike are you getting? As I'm short I always have to have them lowered so I don't change bikes very often. My oh is always changing his not even sure if I can remember what he's got at the moment.
Polly glad your pre assessment has been and gone. Hope you took a good book with you.
Strange how people think you're all ok when chemo/rads have finished. Even people I've told throughout still don't seem to get it. I've referred myself to the occupational health doctor at work in the hope that it will become very clear that I'll need to take it easier for a while. Just hope to hell they agree!
Take care all. Can't wait for York.
Polly - glad your pre-assment went ok, got mine today for my snb.
Claire - glad your son went to school:) big hugs xxx
Sophie - bike - wow:))) Husband has a bike in bits in the garage, metal bits arrive daily from ebay. My friends husband kept his bike in the dining room for 12 years, it was mentioned in their divorce papers:) Good Luck:)))
Nottsgal - glad you had a nice weekend away. Tell your gp what the pysch said, be kind to yourself:)))
Millykins - I watch all sorts of randomness at stupid o'clock:))
Been reading up a lot on the hot flushes, nothing stops them, wear layers, avoid stress, caffeine, alcohol and sleep on cotton sheets. Lots of stuff about taking natural remedies, but will speak to bcn after my op. Has anyone else got the pounding noise in their left ear???? Most annoying!
Husband has told me he is going on a golfing weekend 2 weeks after my surgery, he dosen't even play golf......
Got my wig washed yesterday, hairdresser was amazed at my hair growth, she deals with a lot of bc ladies so has seen it all before, she said she can put a semi permanent hair colour on, so thats the grey problem covered up:) Going to wait until after my op though, give it a few more weeks growth.
Cash in the Attic and similar programmes are the reason I want to go back to work ;0)
My hubby thinks I should tell our GP what the psychologist said (I have appt next Tues as sick notes runs out) and leave it to him. I don't want to avoid talking to my boss in the meantime but don't want to lie and say I'll be back at the start of June when I probably won't. The psychologist also said if you go back too early and can't cope it's more demoralising (presumably than watching Bargain Hunt etc).
Hope you all have good days, and Claire, hope the school are now looking after your son properly so there is no drama this morning.
Suzy - forgot to say - not much of a friend - may have been too worried to take it up with you & didn'tknow how to deal with it but still just booking for someone else totally not on.
Nottsgal - I'm just thinking s*d it & going with Sept with a phased return which will be 2 months after RADS finishes - I think Kaz (poppy) got signed off for 2 months after RADS - I think we need time to recover more mentally as well as physically. I still burst into tears at the drop of a hat - blubbed on the phone to boss when she asked how my daughter was getting on. don't want to go back being too vulnerable. take the time you need. If they are that cluless they have booked you appts as if you'll be totally back to normal straight away they clearly have no idea of the impact & need to be shown by you getting a DR to sign you off for longer. Also if you go back too soon & can't cope you risk being off for even longer if it crumbles so better to get stronger first I think!!!
silly I am V tired but don't want to go to bed????? - watching cash in the attic -?!?!?!"?"?
Just back from a long weekend away - was lovely.
Suzy, if your friend couldn't wait for you to be well enough to use the long haul flights with her like she had offered, then she is no friend. Definitely don't go on holiday to Tenerife with her. Imagine if you were out there together and ended up having a big row. Usually a name change is not too expensive, if it's too late to cancel.
I'm another in the parallel universe. Can't be bothered with a lot of people's trivial stuff.
Milly, my boss asked me a few weeks ago when I might be going back to work. I said a month after the end of RADs. Next thing I know I have a full week of work appointments in my work diary. The first morning I'd be back I have a 10am meeting in Loughborough scheduled. This would mean I'd have to go into the office the previous week to print out my meeting notes. Anyway, all this got thrown into the air on Friday when I saw the hospital psychologist. She said it is too early to go back and I should have another month off. She said I expect too much of myself. CONFUSED now and no idea what to say to my boss.
Also got my appointment for heart scan prior to starting herceptin. The appt is when I'm supposed to be at Penny Brohn, so I rang hospital and it will be changed - but who knows to when.
Congrats Julie on 50th and congrats Sophie on bike.
hi julie - good to hear from you
sophie - enjoy bike and stella enjoy motorhome (are boosters stronger than standard rads??).
kerry- yes i guess we have to look at how far we come rather than what left, hope you feeling less weepy
polly- ta for hug
ive had funny old day- after i posted, my son who has broken his leg you may recall, flat refused to go to school saying he is bored cos cant get to lessons n work getting to him is sporadic - i understand his plight but feel he should go to school. i finally got him to school at 11am and only after getting a teacher on the phone to speak to him!!. he come home ok tonight
it took an hour to drive to different hospital for rads scan etc, lots more traffic enroute than anticipated - i was so wobbly and weepy - i had started the day wobbly but then my sons refusal to go to school just flipped me n i cried.
anyway, i am now tattood and scanned etc -and start thur 26th - goodness only knows how i am going to sort lifts for 20 days etc and really dont want to go alone.
Sophie you get that bike on the road & enjoy it
kerry et al - I think our tolerance for the trivial leaves us somewhat & I have unfriended & blocked posts from a few people as their constant cryptic unimportant comments annoyed me so much. it's not their fault - we prob all got bogged down with meaningless stuff before all this but things all take on much more meaning when your life is threatened like this. for me family, friends & experiences are now so much more meaningful & important than mere "things".
Polly sorry your assessment took so long but all par for the course I think. hope all goes well for you
spoke to my manager today for first time in over 2 months. found out we are no longer allowed to park in our office car park so will have to pay for local parking - that on top of a pay freeze. I shall deffo be playing the cancer crad & getting a "disabled" space as another woman got one when she went back!!!. didn't mention timing but am going in after RADS to discuss timings for returning URGH!!!! the thought of that fills me with dread at the mo so I know I won't be ready for a while. Prob Sept - have a bril doc who will do what I want I am sure.
Julie congratulations on your 50th and also the weight loss.
Trip great you are getting your own bike again.
Dancing girl your motor home holiday sounds lovely.
Girls sending hugs to those in need. Chin up. Remember how far we've come already. Xxx
Had pre assessment today. Was hours there. Why isn't anything quick? Had to see BCN first at 12. She was showing different prostheses to me. Pre assessment at 1.30 so went for a coffee. Took over 3 hours to see 3 different people. Auxiliary nurse, different nurse then doc. Thought it would just be quick blood test and blood pressure then home. Should gave realised by now things aren't that simple.
Hope everyone has a better day tomorrow.
We've talked about hiring a motorhome for years. All this bc stuff has pushed us into hiring one and we are going to explore the Scottish Islands in June.
My rads are going OK too, Trip. I've had my 15 standard ones - nice and pink, but otherwise OK. For the first time I feel really tired today - guess they are catching up with me. Had the first of my 5 booster ones today. I can't pass the pencil test - but then I never could - not even a very very thick pencil!
See the onc tomorrow for results of Dexa scan and to start Arimidex - not looking forward to that.
Hi everyone - on 'the year' thing, I've heard that from quite a lot of people who've been through it, and fortunately, some of them have also informed OH of the same (so it must be true).. fortunately, I'm feeling fine - which I'm guessing is due to not having done all the TAX. So, sorry, but just had to share 🙂
Rads is going ok, going splendidly pink in a beautiful square, six more to do. Still able to wear a bra, though as the ones I have leave marks when I take them off, I may forgo that in case they start to rub. Remaining boob is hardly big enough to cause a storm if I went bra-less, after all. Can still pass the pencil test...
Couldn't agree more about the parallel universe, and the feeling that there is so much more to life.. and in all honesty, am not sure I was ever much for one for discussing washing powder when we could be discussing our next trip away...lol. But the 'do it now' thing is def. where I'm at - hence buying the new motorbike. It hit me on Saturday that my bike had been in the workshop for YEARS.. and if I didn't take matters into my own hands, then I'd prob. never have a bike on the road again. Up to now, I've sort of gone along with the whole 'other things to spend money on/can always use OH's bike/don't 'really' need one anymore... but NO MORE... I refuse to waste any more time putting things off that are important to me. ME ME ME. lol. Been a mother for 17 years and have put everybody else first in all that time.. well, littlies still are important, of course, but so am I. So there.
And I'd be fuming with that so called 'friend' taking off with someone else and not me - screaming mad. Get out of that other holiday with her, and go somewhere which suits you, with someone else. And have a blast.
Hi girls sorry havent been on for a while but keeping up on face book etc with most of you I havent read all the back posts but hope those feeling achey sore nips and down soon feel better im back to my 2 nights work now and must say im knackered and understand when you say people think youre over it and better now huh I wish..........I find after my second night my arm all the way down to my wrist aches and pulls and I know its because we quite busy and moving heavy patients around isnt easy even when I do try to becarefull I think I might ask if a sleeve might be a good idea just for work ( not that i want one but if it helps support it).still doing canny on my diet 9 lb now but feet are still like old ladies puffy ankles so gonna mention when i go to see onc june 1st.I had the big 50 birthday last week ( dont know if i already told yous that or not???).going away on hols June 10th so looking forward to that and am having to buy size 12 clothes woo hoo. Excuse for a new wardrobe more retail therapy.been out walking grand-puppy everyday hes keeping me fit but such a wimp he cries if he stands on a prickle or a stone and wont go in the sea yet he does a bit of wave dodging to get his ball ha ha.Hope everyone doing ok with rads those who still having treatment. Is everyone almost finished now? ??? Ive lost count weena was a bit behind everyone else i remember xxxKaz did you book me a room or is there none left if not I may still come down and meet on the saturday if so how much is it and how do I pay ill have to see if I can get train tickets. Big hugs everyone xxx julie B
Claire - i get a hug every morning, but not from OH, from my will:) Husband not that huggy. Will send you a hug across the t'internet, you can do it, look how you have come. Big hugs.
Feel very weepy today, husband just told me to get a grip 🙂
Totally right about the paralell universe.
suzy - that is really horrid of your "friend"
kerry /Lif - i feel like i am on a parallel path too or as i see it, ive been put in a layby whilst everyone else rushes past me on their fast moving road.
i had a good one - i was with a friend nipping to shops in car and she pulled in to a disabled parking space with the words oh well you are on chemo we can say that - not said in any nasty way but it took me a bit by surprise nevertheless.
i am going to different hospital today for appoitment for rads - i assume it will be scan/tattoo etc but really dont know - just a bit nervous
felt lonely this weekend - kids been with dad - met friends on saturday.
i find mornings difficult as my mind races sometimes - you know how it does with this c**p and i imagine what it would be like if i had OH to just reassure me and get me going in the morning to face the world but perhps i have this rose tinted image now of what it would be like if OH was still here- im sure most of you will tell me that you dont get a hug and reassuarances every morning and to "get real" claire!!
LIF, that's swimming parents all over. The ones who sit in the gallery and whinge and moan, complain about the teachers and coaches, bitch about Precious Little Jessica's "rival" (in their eyes, not in the kids'), they're all the same. And the very last to actually get up off their bums and DO something!
Suzy - some so called 'friend'. You really find out who your friends are during treatment.
Kerry - you really feel sort of separate from everyone one else and their trivia, as if they are on a different planet.
Lif your post appeared as tried to post - so yes, I do.
Afternoon! I am a stroppy cow...always have been!!! I know exactly what you mean kerry as sat in swiming pool gallery on monday evenings whilst youngest has his swimming lesson is priceless....discussions re roasting aubergines, how awful it is that a certain brand of x y or z have now got no carrots in it, discussions about interior workings of dishwashers etc!!! I often feel like getting up on a chair and shouting stop ironing ur knickers and get out there and live! I think they are all too caught up in the minute details of life to appreciate the bigger picture!
I don't have time to waste on friends who are not, I'm not rude or anything I just don't waste my energy on worrying about them....
Gawd I DO sound like a grumpy cow!....I'm not, I have just got my priorities right and Suzy I'm sending a big hug....xx
Do you all sometimes feel as if you are living in a paralell universe? I know I do!!
Suzy - what a b*tch of s friend!!!! How rude to have arrange to go to barbados with you, then take someone else!!! Its so thoughtless, did she not even check first that you would be ok in the sun? Some people are unbelievable. Really feel for you, hun, its just another blow. Self pity all you want. Big hugs xxx
Yesterday was a day i wouldnt like to live again. At a kids party and heard lots of woe is me and my life is crap from certain quarters and oh, my life is perfect, my children are perfect from others...............sat there listening, thinking life is way too short. 15 minutes on the best way to roast aubergines??? What ever floats their boat!! I have found that i have become way less tolerant of people, or maybe i have always been a stroppy cow:))
Happy sunday lovelies
Suzy - This is awful - I would also think of changing your friend to go to Tenerife. How insensitive.
Kerry and polly pocket - my hair is growing but is fuzzy, grey, white and black. I could not go without wig. I did not lose all of my eyelashes and eye brows.
Agree with all of you - still feeling crap with chemo aches etc
WHY DON'T THEY TELL THIS UPFRONT??? I was also told by onc this week that it would be a year til aches went...
I'm actually really down right now, just been majorly let down by some one I would probably have called my best friend. She knows that I'm broke as working part time and also that I've been down recently (can't think why!) A couple of years ago she got two free longhaul flights which we were going to use and yesterday I find out she's going with another friend to Barbados!!!!!! A slap in the face, I'm gobsmacked at the thoughtlessness of it, completely unbelievable. I know I've no right to expect anything, but the fact was she said we'd go somewhere together (we thought of Las Vegas) and that was way before the BC. We're supposed to be going to Tenerife together but I'm going to see if I can get out of it. I don't understand how someone could be so thoughtless - if ever I 'needed' to go to Barbados, it's now. So, feeling bad - my 'best mate' actually isn't that at all but instead is just a thoughtless person who doesn't care about me at all. (she has said sorry and that the reason she is taking someone else is that she thought I couldn't be in the sun, pretty lame really considering I'm supposed to be going to Tenerife with her!)
Sorry to go on but so p***ed off. I haven't told anyone else as just too upset right now. Enough with the self pity, hopefully I'll be back to my normal self soon
Hope all well (despite the aches)
Hi, missed you all. We were away the bank holiday weekend and internet problems since. Back on yesterday - taken me all morning to catch up with the posts.
Commiserations to all those with aches, pains, nails dropping off, relationship problems, people's lack of understanding etc.
I've now had 15 rads with booster week to go - no real problems so far- skin pink and nipple a bit sore.
Now 8 weeks post chemo. Hair grew back a bit in muddle of chemo with the appendicitis long gap. Some came out when I got started again and the rest stopped growing. Now growing well around lower three inches but not all hair growing through yet on rest, so looks thin - was thick before. Had lost most of lower eyelashes, remainder fell out last week. Had lost some upper lashes - again all fallen out this week. Still have muscle aches.
Re sleep. I had had problems for years and used to take the odd sleeping tablet when I got desperate. Prescribed with low dose(10mg) amitriptyline just after diagnosis. It doesn't help you get to sleep, but you go back to sleep quickly if you wake up in the night or ridiculously early. It's not addictive either.
I recommended it on another thread and I see LiF has tried it too.
I've had hot flushes for 7 years - drive me mad - onc says they will get worse when I start Arimidex! One advantage of no hair is you can remove hat or wig when you have one to let the sweat pour out.
Polly - you have written exactly what i have been thinking, i still have cancer, yet people expect me to be 'back to normal' its interesting what Claire's GP said about the effects lasting up to a year, no one tells you this stuff at the beginning, if we were told it wouldnt come as such a suprise. Eyelashes are not reappearing, got some so not to bad. Hair on head still growing, not brave enough to go wig less though. Hows everyone else doing, hair wise?
These hot flushes are so annoying, how do others deal with them? Its like someone has turned the gas up inside me.