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wanting to help a friend

6 REPLIES 6
avonlea
Member

Re: wanting to help a friend

what a lovely thought - you friend is lucky to have you.

Personally i went off any kind of smells while on chemo too.

I guess any practical help would be a better idea- like you could clean her kithen if you are really close and if not, doing her weekly shopping.

If she has kids- maybe take the kids out to have a fun or something- she'd be really appreciate for that. Or baby sit some weekends..

love to both of you

xxx

Kindensurprise
Member

Re: wanting to help a friend

Practical help will be really welcome too, like maybe taking a meal around for them. A good friend of mine made extra for her family and brought it round as a sort of 'takeaway' for my family. I didn't always eat much of it myself, but it was so appreciated, especially by my husband who then had one less thing to think about.

If she has kids, what about offering to help with them one day/afternoon? Or go around and sit with her so that her husband can go out without worrying about her.

You are very kind and thoughtful. Having this disease really makes you learn who your friends are and appreciate them, particularly after the main treatment phase when people can go off the boil and stop helping which can be when you need it too, as you come to terms with living with breast cancer.

I was also told to steer clear of essential oils etc and to eat as if pregnant to avoid unecessary tummy upset/infection.

Good on you, good luck to your friend

Kinden
x

CaroleD
Member

Re: wanting to help a friend

Hi

On the other hand I haven't gone off food or scents at all and actively buy scented candles, and still love wearing my perfume. I think I'd avoid the actual aromatherapy oils themselves as I'm not sure if they would be too strong and you never know what will interfere with the chemo.

However, as you don't know how she will react to the chemo herself, perhaps best to stick with non-scented things. I haven't heard anyone say they have gone off the smell of flowers and plants though. Does she have a garden? What about box of plants or a voucher for a local garden centre? You have to be careful and wear gloves for gardening (gloves?) but it's very therapeutic. I went and bought myself six new houseplants at the start of this. I find having plants round about me, and the notion of helping something to grow and thrive is psychologically really beneficial. You do get colder on the chemo so perhaps a nice wrap would be good as suggested. As the weather is getting warmer, a lighter one might be nice for those summer evenings.

It's a lovely thing you're doing. The simplest thing though is just to keep in touch, both with her and her husband (he suffers too). It makes a huge difference. 🙂

Carole

lah60
Member

Re: wanting to help a friend

Hello

What a lovely thought.

Personally I completely went off all smells and some foods during chemo. The smell of wheat bags still makes me feel ill as I associate it with the pain and the drugs being administered. Also some essential oils may react with the chemo drugs. Perhaps I nice unscented skin lotions would help.

Foodwise I went off cheese and cholcolate as again I associated them with the chemo. Some chemo drugs affect your sense of taste.

The things I appreciated most were the nice cards (make a homemade card?) and words of support and also the fact that people kept in touch.

The best presents were a shawl which I wore on chemo days to keep me warm and books.

horace
Member

Re: wanting to help a friend

I had a care parcel from my daughter in law which had a magazine,some lemon and ginger tea bags and a shawl to put round my shoulders.It was lovely to receive.I think scents and some essential oils are actually not recommended on chemo but I too think you are a very special lady.

judyw47
Member

Re: wanting to help a friend

Hi

What a lovely thoughtful friend you are. I probably wasn't the norm but I found the loveliest gifts during my chemo were the pretty scarves and homemade headcoverings people gave me. Little cards with lovely words and 'worry angels'. I was really sick throughout and didnt appreciate food and scents at the time...but dived straight back to those things after the treatment was over.

I'm sure ladies will be along later with all their suggestions.

Best wishes to you and your friends

Judy

Eliahn
Member

wanting to help a friend

Hello,
I have a co-worker who's wife was recently diagnosised with Breast Cancer. She is now in the beginning stages of her chemotherapy. And I would really like to do something nice for her. I currently make relaxation eye pillows (filled with lavendar,chamomile,etc)and homemade lotions. I would really like to make something for her. Does anyone have any suggestions on what type of herbs or scents that might work best? I am hoping that my little gift will help relieve her stress (even if it is for a few moments) and maybe help her with any other side effect she maybe suffering (ie nausea, loss of appetitate) Any info you can give would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you 🙂

Eliahn