Hi Sunflower, I was dreading having the tattoos as I'd got the impression from a friend who'd had bc a while back that they were painful. I hardly felt them! The radiologist said having a blood test hurt more and she was right! x
Oh Daisy200, what an induction into the start of radiotherapy!!! Hopefully you won’t have long to wait before the rads start, and don’t worry, there are no needles or any more dye that will be used! In your case I’m sure the hospital will be glad they won’t need to pick you up off the floor again!!!
Got my radio tattoos today. Never had a tat before, but who knows now the ice has been broken :-)
Last chemo this week too.
And still got the blue nipple. I had a bit of an experience with that actually. I fainted and managed to knock myself unconcious on the way down, ended up in A&E to get checked. Had an ECG in triage (all fine) but one of the nurses noticed my blue nipple putting the ECG tags on and wanted to talk to me about my 'unusual bruising'. I'm sure she thought we were into S&M or something.
Helena you'll do well I'm sure. Let me know how you get on. I lost interest for a while if I'm honest but knew I'd get back into it- It was just when. Now I've started I won't/can't stop! I'm just hoping the club will stay open as it is struggling.
What a fantastic confidence booster and wonderful that the bowlers were so welcoming I remember when I started playing again last year I was nervous, but as you say its like riding a bike.
Even the lady who I phoned the result through to was shocked at the result but very congratulatory. The next round is on Monday but that is going to be some game
Wow Helena that was good-well done you and your partner and what a score! I'm only playing friendlies and going down for the odd game with my husband because there are no competitions at the moment with it being the outdoor season. I went down there last week because my husband bought new woods and he wanted to practice with them-no good so he bought other's today ( the other's he bought on condition he could take them back if no good) He found these much better and two sizes down on his original one's. I also went down there with four of us on Wednesday and we drew. Not bad considering I'd been out months and he had the woods he returned. I was ok if I'm honest as it all came back to me- like riding a bike I suppose. I know I mentioned before to you about the other bowlers there but they have been marvellous . I couldn't get away on Wednesday because they all came up to me saying how nice it was to see me back.
Yay, how did you get on.
My partner and I won our 1st round county pairs on Monday, beat them 26-6 and they are both county bowlers so you can imagine the shock waves
I agree with Helena about your post being very frank and in my case useful. I thank you for that. I also agree with Helena saying that good BCN'S are worth their weight in gold. When I spoke to my surgeons secretary a couple of weeks ago ( they sent for me in error to see him) she felt as if I had slipped through the net regarding follow ups etc. I'm sure you will be fine next week and if you do blubber I think it will be of joy/relief.
Let us know how you get on.
Rubycat if you read this please carry on with your captions as think they're hillarious!
Helena you'll be pleased to know the other bowler has started again! Haven't lost my Mojo!
What an amazingly frank post, I am so glad to hear that you are able to have this conversation with your bcn, good ones are worth their weight in gold.
I remember saying exactly the same words to my counsellor the day before I had my last rads session, that I was scared of losing my comfort blanket, she too explained that it was totally natural to feel that way and it was part of the healing process going forward. I had a couple more sessions with her after that and I recall the last session actually saying to her that I felt it was time I let go of her and moved forward.
Hi everyone! Its Friday today and that means 2 rad free days are coming up! Yay! Actually, i dont really mind them overall, but it's just a nice feeling not to have to schlepp up to the hospital and back again! I had session 12 of 20 today. Skin is holding up well and just a tad pick in places and a bit itchy hear and there. Resisting the urge to scratch however!
Welcome to SamH87 and DaisieMoo. Very glad that you have joined us.
Congratulations to DramaJo for coming to the end of this phase..... a fantastic achievement.
And then to JulieWulie and everyone else who have been in the discussions on life after rads (....and everlasting blue boobs....), I saw the Breast Care Nurse today briefly and she was talking about this exact point, saying that the expectation from people who havent gone through what we're going through is that everything immediately goes back to normal and that you're 'fixed' and meanwhile, we feel as though we've lost our comfort blankets and have yet come to terms (in our own ways) with the aftermath. I'm going to spend some time with her more next week going through all this as whilst I'm being strong at the moment, i know that this is the thing i have absolutely not dealt with as yet. However, what i wanted to get across was the comment she made to me about how absolutely normal is is for us all to feel like this, that we're not being in any way 'weak' and that we absolutely shouldn't feel in some way inadequate by feeling concerned about this next phase. In any event, it has made me much more comfortable about talking to her some more next week (...and with an expectation that i might well crumble into an emotional blubbing wreck......which is something i haven't done since i was first diagnosed).
Other than that, have a fabulous weekend enjoying the Royal Wedding or not depending upon your take on things......
Well done and congratulations..it is such an emotional day, enjoy every minute of ringing that bell.
I rang it a week and a half ago and can't tell you how happy I felt that day to get to the end and i'm sure you feel the same.
Good luck SamH87 and Daisimoo, hope all goes well with your rads.xx
Your wise words have resonated with me as I have looked at the various posts over the last 3months. You are a wonderful support to so many women on here, thank you for being there for everyone!
Thanks Jencat, hope your treatment is going ok xxx
We will be ringing the bells for you later today.
Know exactly what you mean, it is a very emotional time, it brings to a close your active treatment and I think a very important moment because you have got there, that is a massive achievement, well done you.
I was fine when I finished mine but on the way back to the car I just burst into tears, I didnt realise that I had been holding so much in. That was 18 months ago and life is back to normal.
Sending you lots of hugs for today
Morning lovely ladies.
Last rads for me today, feeling a tad emotional, but so thankful and grateful for the exceptional care I have received from our wonderful NHS.
Good luck SamH87 and Daisiemoo, hope the rads go smoothly, before you know it, they will be all done!
Hope you all have a good day!
Starting my 15 sessions of rads next week, with the week of the bank hols 4 days and the other day the following week.
Got my Aloe ready and just wait and see how I am with it, also starting my Tamoxifen tonight ... so the next stage starts 😊
I started my rads on a bank holiday, the hospital was very quiet but the radiotherapy department was working as normal! I guess it depends do on your own unit though! X
I will have had two Bank Holidays during my radiotherapy and the missed days have been added to the end of my treatment x
Helena, I had one session of radiotherapy at 5pm last week and the next day was at 8.30am and I was also told that it was ok as long as there were at least 6 hours between them x
I know when I had mine it was over the Xmas period 2016 and there were 4 days when it was bank holiday so it extended my treatment by that amount of time.
I do recall the radiographer saying one day, when things were running very very late and I was concerned that I would be having the next one early the next day, that as long there is at least 6 hours between them that is ok.
I think you may find that it will be an extra day, or I have seen on here that sometimes they do them on a Saturday.
Don't mind you joining us at all. I too had lumpectomy in November and still have a blue boob. I think with me it was because everything was diagnosed and operated on so soon- then I had radiotherapy very quickly too. I coped so well then ( too well maybe?) I also look quite well. Nobody would ever know what I've gone through if they didn't know me. I feel as if people were supportive in the beginning but now it's a case of " treatment is over now so back to normal" but to me it's another hurdle to encounter. I didn't have any problems having radiotherapy but do keep putting the cream on-I still do now if I'm honest and do the odd exercise given to me.
Hope you're feeling better soon and in answer to your question- it isn't just you but the majority of us. I think it's hard for other's to totally understand unless they've actually experienced any form of " C".
Hope you don't mind me jumping in. I had lumpectomy in November, 4 chemo's and 23 rads, finished rads on the 8th of May,diagnosed her2 and er2 positive, 7 out 18 Herceptin done and on my second month of Letrozole, .
I too still have a blue boob. loI. I expected to be feeling so much better by now but I'm so tired all the time, an emotional wreck and hip joints hurt. i had a few blisters and still red, sore and itchy but is healing nicely, been using E45, Hydrocortisone and Intrasite gel. Anyone else feel like this? Before being diagnosed I was very fit and used to run 4 miles a day but now even walking takes it out of me. Support is a bit thin as everyone thinks, that now treatment has finished i should feel ok, I too am a worrier and stress head but not had much support exept from rad staff who have been fantastic, I have been reading posts on here for a while and everyone seems so supportive and lovely, so glad i joined the forum. Sorry about the long post there is so much I want to get out and talk about. Good luck to you all.xx
Thanks Ladies for your support and advice. It's just when somebody says something like that it makes you doubt/question yourself and think is it me? I told my GP when I saw her and she was appalled. I also mentioned to her I thought I was a burden to every one. It was then that she too mentioned she could arrange Counselling for me too if necessary.
I've mentioned before I'm a worrier/ stresshead so this has done me no good at all.
Sorry to moan but thanks again.
One thing that this has taught me is to slow down, take my time to do things xx
That person is an idiot and really not worth wasting your wonderful energy on. xxx
Oh those are very wise words and I endorse them completely.
We are too hard on ourselves, we expect once we have finished active treatment we should go back to the way we were, but we dont realise that we really need a period of "recovering" from a major happening in our lives.
I too had counselling which started before and continued during my rads which helped me enormously and it was lovely to have a safe place to be honest with myself without worrying that I was upsetting anyone.
Ladies you rock you have been through so much and you have done it, i am sending you all much love and hugs xxxx
You're right because I am always hard on myself. I always try to run before I can walk and do everything at 100 miles an hour. I think it's the first time I've "given in/ admitted" that it is time I asked for help during this period. I think ( in my experience anyway) that people think once you've finished rads you're fine and back to normal. As I mentioned before this is when it hit me. It has also been mentioned to me-stop feeling sorry for yourself! That did wonders for my health and confidence!
I was wondering regarding your counselling is this involving Mindfulness?
Sorry that your day has been so frustrating but I absolutely love your latter part of it and its positivity. Yes thank goodness for routine screening xx
Sending you loads of hugs
Handbagaddict, I've had the 'run over by a bus' scenario said to me so many times now that I'm beginning to think I'd better try and avoid them!
I know what you mean about being in a cocoon, I've had regular hospital appointments during chemo and now during rads and then it will be trying to get back to 'normal' life.
I've been offered counselling by Macmillan. I didn't feel I needed it during chemo or now through rads, but I'm going to have some once I've finished because I think I might find it difficult then and people will all think I'm fine x
I have a blue boob too, like was said here, I'm so used to it now that It's become part of my norm & don't think about it anymore. There's def a blue boob club going on 😀Xxx
Oh Vonne, what a day! Sorry it was such a nightmare but glad you can still be positive at the end of it all!
you have to laugh at the blue palm matching the boob!
Hope today is better! Xx
Thought for the Day...
Yesterday excelled itself! 🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪
Because of traffic complications and lack of hospital parking I took the train instead of the car but various problems developed there too, so I was on 6 trains in total and the whole thing took 8 hours!!!!! All for the 15 minutes radiotherapy appointment! Got back to my local train station where they had just painted a handrail, so I now have a blue palm! Then the heavens opened and I got soaked in the 10 minute walk to the car! 🤨
At least I was getting a massage from a friend when I got back? Hmmm...even that had problems, because very stupidly I put large white hospital bandages over the scars so she wouldn’t see them, (still very self conscious about them) but my skin started to peel when I took them off! 😬 Ouch! 😯
But...at least I could relax the rest of the evening and soak in the bath? No chance! Some of my extended family decided to offload their problems on the phone to me one after the other and it was 10.30 pm when I could get peace! Went to bed and have now been awake for over an hour in pain!
What a brilliant day!
However...all is well...because...
I’m having radiotherapy!
I’m grateful they caught BC at screening before it got any worse and am mindful that the day could have been a much more somber one, tomorrow is a wonderful new day with lots of fresh challenges to explore!
Dramjo, the blue breast and blue palm are almost the same shade! I’ve scrubbed my hand but it needs paint remover, pity it wouldn’t work removing the blue dye too! 😂😂😂😂😂
I hadn't really thought about how i would feel after my treatment finishes until this past weekend whilst sitting in the garden. I feel like I'm in a little cocoon at the moment with a daily routine of rad treatment and boob maintenance and then everything else is secondary. I think the thought of recurrence and potential long term damage caused by the rads made me suddenly realise that i might not actually live as long overall as I had originally thought I might and actually that's going to take me a while to get my head around. Albeit I do also realise that in all likelihood, I will be fine...and there's probably a higher probability of being run over by a bus......or something like that. I think what I'm trying to say, is that its easy to just be focused on getting through the treatment without actually thinking about coping with the aftermath.
On a more cheery note though.... @ Vonne ......you had me giggling about blue boobs! I thought I might be the only one still suffering but clearly not! This could well turn out to be a new form of 'free mason style handshake'.... you know.....you're in a secret club and the only way to identify one another is to somehow display a part of your blue boob... Could it catch on.....???
@ F - sorry to hear about your blisters and soreness. Hope you manage to get hold of something that can soothe the discomfort.
That's exactly how I felt after my radiotherapy-as if I was abandoned and hit a brick wall. My Oncologist is also arranging Counselling for me at my local Cancer hospital. I went to my first Moving Forward Course "class" and there were a couple of blips- eg slides not working but the volunteers there were very good/nice. Then we had a discussion on nutrition. I haven't been since due to illness and now as I mentioned before think have a tooth abscess so off to the Dentist later.
Maybe it would be an idea to ring the number given to ask advice? Sorry I couldn't help anymore.
I also found the travelling took a long time for my course. A trip would usually take 20 minutes took 2 hours due to the work traffic etc.
My hospital offers free complimentary treatments such as hand/ foot massage. Have you been offered anything like this? It might make you feel a bit more relaxed?
yes, as the others have said it will be 15 in total. I also had Bank holiday Monday off. It is nice to have a lazy start to the day 😊
It has all gone very smoothly, and you will find you will quickly get into the swing of things.
Have a good day ladies! Xxxx
Your redness and blistering sound awfully sore, are you getting something for that?
How many more treatments do you need?
Apart from pinkness and itchiness right now I’m fine.
The infantilising sounds perfectly reasonable and makes sense...I always used to be in control of my emotions until BC, but even more so now since the rads.
Now to solve the rest of it!!!
I’m also interested in the Moving Forward Course as I suspect that I shall feel as if I have been cast adrift when my treatment ends. Any reviews of the course would be welcome.
Thanks very much
I’m finding I get more emotional too and little things get to me more than they used too. I definitely think it’s the treatment. In a way it is infantilising as you are not in control, the medics are. Maybe we will all turn into toddlers with tantrums! I’m also reacting badly to the zaps. I’ve got a bright red breast with dry blisters and get stabbing pains which isn’t helping my equilibrium. How about you?
Best of luck for the rest of your treatment
Ladies, I’m hyper emotional!!!
I feel nauseous, very tired, emotional, don’t want to eat then eat too much, feel like I have a temperature but I don’t, and did I mention emotional???!!!🤔🤔🤔
I have a pink (and blue 😅) boob and my face has gone super dry so I’m piling on moistureiser! I want the world to leave me alone and feel that everything is hard work and too much. My back and muscles hurt, and now a pre existing medical condition is getting a lot worse (stress???)😢
Is any of this to do with radiotherapy or just emotionalism in general from BC, or am I a hypochondriac?!!! 😜
Do any any of you feel like this? I feel that day 6 is far too early for any symptoms and the only side effects I’ve heard of is tiredness. Can any of these things be anything to do with our treatment?
You definitely add an extra day on for radiotherapy if there is machine maintenance as it happened to me.
I was also wondering what people thought about The Moving Foward Course on another thread you have written on. I have attended one session but unfortunately i don't think I can attend this week as think i have a tooth abscess and have a Dental Appointment tomorrow morning-never rains but it pours!
Hope all goes well with your Radiotherapy when it starts.
What a beautiful morning! Great start to the week. Hope everyone had wonderful weekends.
@ Fenouillard - I think you've trumped me with your radiotherapy story! Very funny and just plain strange! I cant imagine what was going through your mind at the time!
@ Sunflower - Welcome and as the others have said, of course you can join! No minimum entry requirements here! Really hope that you are feeling better having had a few days to reflect on your prep meeting. And its great that you dont have to breath hold, given that it was one of things you were most concerned about.
Having had session 8 today, I have 12 more to do. Starting to look a bit darker around the side and there's one bit which just irritates me if i have a bra on for too long. Its not pink or anything, it just irritates and I think i feel it more because I'm left handed so my arm is constantly moving! Decided to try and go bra-less whenever i can get away with it. I'm quite small chested, so can probably get away with it for a bit.....
Breath hold thing was the easiest yet today......
Enjoy the sunshine all nad hope you all have great weeks.
Apparently it's a total dose divided into a number of individual doses so you can't miss one because that would reduce the whole dose. But, the doses don't usually have to be every day. My treatment went over Christmas and New Year so even though I had days off for weekends and Bank Holidays, I still got my 15 sessions (it just took 4 weeks instead of 3).
Happy Monday 😀
On The home run this week , number 12 of 15 today, none tomorrow as machine maintenance. Have felt tired this weekend, had naps Saturday and yesterday. Skin looking darker, but feels ok.
Have a good week everyone!