Hi Jilly, you are bound to get panicky still, that’s very natural, but it’s great you have your diagnosis and treatment plan. I just had a lumpectomy and node clearance, and was in as a day patient. Home with a drain and district nurse visits. Isn’t modern medicine marvellous? For me the op was very low key , but the drain was a bit if a nuisance, as was the node clearance as it affected my arm. I suggest you pop onto the thread for tips etc to get ready for surgery. There’s lots of help on there for practical stuff like a small pillow to cushion your chest for the journey home, and suggestions for pre and post op. Our poor husbands ......what can I say? My dear old boy has been my knight in shining armour. Taking me to every chemo and radiotherapy. I know he, and I’m sure yours too, would rather it be them than us. The virus situation is very grim at the moment, but quite frankly, you won’t want any hugs or squeezes , so a mixed blessing there! Keep up on face book and keep your spirits up. A strong mental attitude will get you far. Good luck with your mastectomy, and let us know how things progress. We are always here for you. 🍀
Hi Ladies....just an update...I have had Scan which shows no spread...so I am due for surgery end of this month Masectomy. Quite surprised only in one night !...then home with drains and district nurse coming next day. I am calmer but still get the occasional panicky feeling....thank you all so much for your replies...my husband of 58 years ! is very supportive but although in good health nearly 80 it just seems a shame at our age we are confronted with this....I just have to keep reminding myself...it never stopped our travels which we have so enjoyed over many years and have many happy memories of some amazing places worldwide. I think we are all feeling quite low and vulnerable especially if you are elderly...have a lovely family and grandchildren missing the hugs and close contact...just have to hope and pray some sort of normality will return for all of us.
Thanks so much to everyone for you kind and inspirational comments
sending Love and hugs xx
Jill, I think you need a few firm facts here. At the moment your mind is imagining the worst, when in fact it isn’t. The hormone drugs are the life saver, and the side effects are, for me, NOT awful. I could do without them, sure, but I live a full and active life, and what’s to say you won’t be the same? If you have been on Google then, as our chief oncologist says, he’s not a Dr, and the Daily Mail is not a medical journal! The number of ladies on here who are living with, not dying from, cancer should reassure you that this is a disease which, if it can’t be cured in some cases, then it can be managed very successfully. Treatments have moved on a million years due to research. I would echo what another has said,to ask your GP for help in order to cope a little better. Once you have your plan in place you should feel a little better. It’s the fear of the unknown that gets us upset, I’ve found. You are braver than you think, Jill, and you are going to get through this. Hugs. X
Hi Shi...It is So very kind of you to take the time to answer and send me such inspirational words. I have always loved life and been very thankful of what I have been given... lovely family wonderful travel opportunities...and good health up until now...I have so much to be very grateful for...just finding this one so hard...Love and Thanks xx
Jill -maybe ask your GP for higher dose Diazepam and /or something to help you sleep .The first couple of weeks after diagnosis are awful and many of us have suffered severe anxiety .insomnia ,palpitations - it does settle down and once you begin treatment and you know what you are dealing with .Everyone has different experiences of hormone therapy and also different levels of benefit in terms of preventing reoccurrence depending on type of cancer, age and other health issues .You should have a proper discussion about this with your team when the time is right and make a decision that is right for you weighing up all the pros and cons .Best wishes from another Jill x
Jill ❤️ Do speak to your team and open up to them too ❤️ They will help reassure you during treatments and also do tell them you both need some support. Please do not let it take your joy of life ❤️ It’ll try but don’t let it ❤️ Look at the sunrise each day and breath it in, listen to the birds singing and how the leaves on the trees play tunes in the wind, enjoy that slice of cake or that favourite biscuit just that little bit more ❤️ Grab your joy and say this is ours and you are not taking it from us ❤️ Step by step and day by day 👭 you will get through together ❤️💕💕✨✨Shi xx
Thanks for your reply...especially as you are in the age bracket !...I am just still in a terrible state...spoke to Mac breast Nurse who suggested I contacted GP the outcome, have a low dose Diazapam...not really helping I keep getting shaking incidents from head to foot !...wake up in night and they are so scary just feel so sorry for my lovely husband of 58 years !...I keep trying to tell myself this could have happened to us many years ago..when you see and read about all the young women affected with young children...I have a CT scan next week..then consultation on 16th....I just think the outlook is so bleak even if you come through the op with recovery time..you are faced with awful effects of the Hormone drugs ....I had a Total Hip replacement this time last year was so thrilled I worked hard and it is very successful...we enjoyed our walks every day while in lockdown...but now feel my world has fallen apart...hope you don’t mind this total opening up to you.
Hugs and best wishes Jill x
Hi Jilly, I was diagnosed Er+Hr- with a tumour in right breast a month after my 70th. Birthday. That was three years ago and I’ve finished my active treatments. Won’t say they weren’t tough, but doable. Like your OH, my lovely hubby was, and still is, devastated. However., without him I would never have made it through so easily. He is my champion, nurse, chef and chauffeur. My big break through was us both finding the local Maggies Centre where we met other people like me. Tbh, all worse than me! I thought my diagnosis was the end of the world, especially when mets were discovered in both lungs not long after I started rads. At our age we’ve experienced life, and all it’s ups and downs , and this is just another ( big) bump in the road. To get to be as old as us means we’re tough, so, big deep breaths, Jilly, and take each day as it comes. Your successful treatment is your medical teams success too. You are very welcome to PM me fir further questions. Hugs and best wishes. Ann x
Sorry you find yourself here, like so many of us. I am slightly younger than you (‘only 64😂) but I think we all go through the same feelings of shock, worry and anxiety, whatever our personal circumstances. And we all worry about the effect on our loved ones.
I am only 4 weeks on from my screening recall when the radiologist told me that she was certain that the suspicious lesion - and lymph node - would both ‘require treatment’ and 2 weeks on from the biopsy results but those initial overwhelming feelings of shock and intense worry have eased. I have still not started any treatment due to the need for a CT scan & the consultant being on annual leave for 2 weeks but I do now know I will be having surgery first - just need a date. Whilst I have moments of intense anxiety and horror, they do pass and I can now concentrate on other things going on in my life I hope that once you know just what your plan is the overwhelming and intense anxiety will ease. And I would suggest you speak to your breast care nurse about any concerns you have, whether about your treatment or about you are dealing with the diagnosis. My nurse has been great so far. And remember that there are no stupid questions.
Does your husband have someone he can talk to about his feelings and worries? - a good friend or a family member? Or he may benefit from talking to a professional or others in a similar situation. You will get a lot of support but our families do need support too, from whatever source they are most comfortable with.
Take care and hope all goes well for you
I am Tara, I am 37 and was diagnosed with Triple Negative Breast cancer in March. I have had surgery, finished my last chemo yesterday and will have radiotherapy soon.
I know you have asked for advice from people of a similar age, but I did not want to pass by without responding. I met a lovely lady in her 70’s on my op day and we have remained friends since. She is doing so well, had a different treatment plan to me, no chemo, had op and radiotherapy instead.
Like Shi has said you will have a treatment plan tailored to you and you seem as though you are ready to kick this into next week!
When diagnosed I saw my hubby cry perhaps for the first time ever. He never gets emotional in front of me. This knocked me for six and I kept asking him if he thought I would not get through this? He never responded yes to me but I could tell that was what he was thinking. To my relief he changed back to his normal self after a couple of weeks and now we get through it with him teasing me about my appearance and he will ignore silly negative comments I sometimes mention. This does annoy me at the time, but it is what I need. It gives me the strength to remember I am doing this, like I know you will too.
Shi has recommended using the someone like you option available by contacting the number on the site. This may be a good option for you as you can speak to a person that has been through the same or similar treatment to what you will be having. Alternatively, the users and members on here are so supportive and offer some fab advice. They have supported and helped me throughout my journey and will continue to do so into the future.
I wish you luck. You got this!
Take care, lots of love 💕 Tara xx
Jilly ❤️ Please ring the number on here and use the someone like me option, they will be able to put you in touch with someone ❤️ I told my husband I’m still me and don’t look at me or treat me any different and after that talk he treated me like me and supported and helped me through the journey, you are in it together and you’ll get through it together 💪❤️ I didn’t want to not reply when I say your post, you sound like a very strong lady who will whack it with your handbag 🥊 and your husband can give it a whack for you too 🥊 step by step and day by day ❤️ Please do lean on your team too, they will be able to guide and support you both ❤️💕💕✨✨Shi xx
In shock as you can imagine....led a full an active life this far...Large tumor in left breast waiting for CT scan...put on Letrozole immediately...breast surgery suggested after result of Scan...I am considering what are my options ...considering quality of life etc...anyone else been through this at this late stage in life...my lovely husband is devastated...