70357members
370188posts
cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

At least it is not an arm or a leg

13 REPLIES 13
Avibaby
Member

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

Hi Chick1,

 

I was not that clear in my last post - I have not had a mastectomy, but I did have a lumpectomy. My opinion is an "uneducated" opinion. So I really don't know what it is like to lose a breast.

 

avibaby

 

 

Wahini
Member

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

Hi Chick1, thanks for your tips. I will get biopsy results next week and I expect to discuss the treatment options then. I hope it will be just a lumpectomy with radiotherapy, that would be a good outcome. I am already lowering the bar. I have to think about reconstruction, my passion is surfing (on a board) so whatever is best for that comes first. My breasts have always been in the way a little bit while surfing so we will see.

Chick1
Member

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

Hello Wahini,

Sorry to hear your story. What a rollercoaster for you. Have you got a surgery date yet/treatment plan? Are you hoping to have an immediare reconstruction?

Remember Angelina Jolie had a genetic link so preventative mastectomies. She did not have breast cancer.

I do not wish to upset you further but having a mastectomy does not reduce recurrence risk to 0. Recurrenxe can still occur.

Some women without genetic link have argued and been supported in having double mastectomy. The second mastectomy can occur at a later date and usually after counselling input.

If you are having a difficult time at the moment thinking about how it may affect you, it may be an idea to ring the helpline and ask to talk to "someone like me" - BCC volunteers willing to support others in similar situations.

Wishing you all the best Wahini X🐥

Chick1
Member

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

Hello Sue,

I am of the same opinion as yourself. BC and the aftermath has affected many things.

If someone is saying that they hace remained relaticely unaffected due to the power of reconstruction, then that is their experience at this time. I find it very odd, but it is not for me to say it is not the case for them if that is indeed their experience.
Regards, 🐥
Wahini
Member

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

I had low-grade DCIS two years ago, lumpectomy and no radiotherapy or chemo. I was told it was not cancer and not to worry. A year later I had mammogram and it looked clear, I was then discharged and I thought phew I came off lightly. Then a few months ago I felt a lump in the same area, I was hoping scar tissue but unfortunately it is cancer and invasive this time. On a mammogram calcification also showed up in the same breast so I had stereo biopsy two days ago to test the tissue. If it is cancerous, then I will probably lose the whole breast. I asked the surgeon, could we not do an 'Angelina Jolie', you know, replace both breasts with implants so I no longer need to worry about developing breast cancer whitout the trauma of having no breasts. Not an option, he said, and Angelina Jolie should be silenced. I don't know yet how I will handle it all. I feel weirdly calm but I don't think I am surpressing emotions and I don't think it is going to be easy. I feel in good hands. I would panick a lot more if I lived in the States for example, without proper health insurance. Take care Sue

Sue C
Community Champion

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

Hi Ladies
I think it would be naive to think that once having reconstruction you are then 'over it'.
Having bc has changed me, and I can never go back to the way I was before. I may look OK on the outside. It is not that noticeable that one breast is slightly bigger than the other. No one can see my physical scars, and my hair has grown back. But, I can't be that carefree person anymore. Every ache and pain, and every lump or bump, will always, in my mind be something to worry about. I'm not saying that I think about it all the time. It's just there, in the back of my head, and that will never go.
I agree that if you can dismiss the impact of bc, then I envy you. But, sadly, I don't think it's that easy.
Sue xx
Chick1
Member

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

Hello Avibaby,

Thank you.

I think it is great that the physical replacement had such a beneficial impact for you and you can just get on with your life again now as before BC. I am very envious that you have managed to be so unaffected by the whole BC experience.

Regards to you 🐥
Avibaby
Member

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

Hi Chick1 - I get your point and I removed all the "we" words. Yes I agree that losing a breast is traumatic but I also think the trauma is temporary if you choose to reconstruct.
Chick1
Member

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

Hello Avibaby,

That is great if you were able to manage your mastectomy and condition in the way you describe below:

"Losing a breast is a psychological shock and a temporary disability to our womanhood - but a breast can be rebuilt and then we can go back to almost everything we did before."

In my opinion, you need to replace the words "our" and "we" with "my" and "I" as you are speaking for yourself and not all of "womanhood".

My opinion is that people may have conditions deemed worse (which also can be quite subjective) but that should not be used to try and negate or dismiss the experience of others."

Best wishes x 🐥


Chick1
Member

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

Hello Wahini,

Sorry to hear about your circumstances. I wanted to echo what Sue has said below. I also think that it is great that you drew positive and constructive inspiration for yourself from watching the participants with disabilities.

Best wishes to you Wahini x 🐥
Wahini
Member

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

In the event were ex soldiers, fit and tough looking guys but with visible disabilities and who knows what else that was not visible. But they were 'real

man' and they carried themselves with pride, competing in front of an audience and giving it their all. I found that inspiring and I cheered real hard.

Avibaby
Member

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

Hello Wahini,

 

I really like your attitude and I agree with you - there are people out there with what I would consider a more serious disability than losing a breast. Losing a breast would be psychological shock and a temporary disability to my womanhood - but a breast can be rebuilt and then I would be able to go back to almost everything I did before.

 

My thoughts are that the people in the event you went to today either never had a "normal" life or will never return to the life they had before their disability, correct? Some of them don't walk, can't bathe or shower by themselves, can't have a sexual relationship.

 

So I don't think that I would have the bigger problem, compared to what they have to deal with.

 

Avibaby

 

 

 

 

 

Sue C
Community Champion

Re: At least it is not an arm or a leg

Hi
Yes, of course, there is always someone worse off than you. And it is amazing what people can deal with.
But, it is still part of you, and you will have to cope with possible physical and mental trauma.
Be kind to yourself and take one day at a time.
Best wishes
Sue xx
Wahini
Member

At least it is not an arm or a leg

I am preparing myself for losing a breast, because that is likely going to happen. I find it difficult, it looks so good now, perfect, hard to believe it has to go.

 

Today I went to the Mey games, these are small Highland Games but special because we always get a Royal visit (Prince Charles). This year there were men and women participating from the Invictus games, you know, disabled servicemen in wheel chairs and with missing limbs. Tough and strong looking guys in kilts throwing hammers and tree trunks, but with rods instead of legs. It was inspiring, I thought, if they can make it work what should I worry about a breast?