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Diagnosed yesterday and scared

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

I guess it just reduces the risk not eliminates it.....everyone’s body’s work differently and I was just unlucky.  I was fine on tamoxifen, compared with some peoples experiences, so I will defo give letrozole a good go and hope for better outcomes.  And this cancer wasn’t a recurrence, but a new primary.

my other 2 cancers were on the left side, so the first one in 2012 I had WLE then I had a recurrence at the exact same place in 2018, so had a mastectomy, I was told that tamoxifen gave me an extra 13 percent protection, and I certainly don’t regret taking it.

i don’t really go on the stats much, they are just averages, i was told after my first bout which was non invasive DCIS 4mm that I had a 2% chance of recurrence but it still came back..... so now I just think I will throw everything at it and trust that I will be ok.

My new Onc says that letrozole works in a different way to tamoxifen so I have to go with that and be hopeful it will do a good job for me.

think you’re having your chemo 3 weekly then?? Mine is weekly for 12 weeks Paclitaxel then 2 weekly EC for 4 weeks.

I am going to learn embroidery, I have got a kit and will ask my sister in law to teach me, and I’m also going to project manage! the fitting of our new kitchen , and I’m going to paint my bedroom pink! It helps me to have something else to focus on.   I’m certainly not missing work, even though I like my job.

Take care Claudia x x

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hi kitkat, I had my 1st chemo on 13th July my next is 3rd August. I'm due to go on tamoxifen once I get to that stage which is supposed to significantly reduce the chances of reoccurrence, did they say why it hadn't worked for you xx

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Ahhh Claudia, sending a big hug your way.  Sorry you feeling so rubbish today..... this is my 3rd primary breast cancer ( although didn’t need chemo for first 2).  There’s nothing good about having BC but I find my outlook on life completely changed since my first diagnosis in 2012.  I always try to find hope and joy in things.....and I know it’s really really hard at times.  I have been taking tamoxifen for last 2 years but still got this new ER+ 7/8 cancer ( other breast) so I know what you mean about thinking about it coming back.....but for the last 2 years I really haven’t thought about cancer that much....I keep myself busy with work and family and friends, and the only time I have a wobble, is when my annual mammogram is due.   My onc says she will put me on letrozole this time so I have to trust in that and hope for a good outcome.

i think you started your chemo same timeish as me?....I was 14th July, I’ve had x 2 chemo now but my hair still there for now....keep waking up every morning thinking, ‘ today will be the day’.

Even with good support around you, having treatment during Covid is really difficult; I’ve only been seeing my children and grandchildren in the garden; I hope you have good support too.

Sending ❤️ X X

 

 

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Been having a really low week and I can't seem to shift my mood. I can't see there being any positives to this horrible disease. If I do manage to make it through this the chances of it coming back seem to be so high. 

My head is also stressing me out it is so itchy, tingly and sore. I think my hair is getting ready to come out but it's been like this for days and I'm 12 days post ex chemo treatment, how long do I have to put up with this it's driving me mad (I haven't cut my hair short as I was using the cold cap) 

Feeling very low at the moment 

 

 

 

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hi Claudia,

Sorry to hear about your relative and of course it adds to your worries, but it does not mean the same will happen to you. It is so easy to start imagining things but breast cancer does not normally cause pain and any twinges are much more likely to be to do with the biopsy - scar tissue inside can get "stuck" and hurt a little. I had chemo after last year's surgery and I was also very keen to get started. Once you do, you can start counting down the days to the end of treatment instead of the start, and that's a good feeling. As others say, try to keep busy and get yourself as ready as you can. I had a little mantra - "these things will pass, all will be well". Good luck Love Mo x

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Community Champion

Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hi Claudia - I’m really sorry to hear the news about your husband’s uncle, and how it has increased your anxiety. That’s not surprising you feel like that, but remember that is his story and not yours. It’s not at all strange to want to get on with the treatment plan - you just want to get on with the process of getting rid of it. The pains you are feeling may be the after effects of the biopsies you had, or linked to anxiety. Take some time to look after yourself now, get things ready for treatment - perhaps stock up the freezer so you don’t have to cook so much, that sort of thing. And offload as much as you like on here! Xx

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hi Claudia,

I remember fearing the same whenever I felt any twinges - I think all the extra prodding about doesn't help - but you've had a clear scan and lymph nodes are good - so try to hold on to that.

Wishing you well for 13th - you'll be on the road to recovery.

Sandpiper

 

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Panic is heightened at the moment, my husbands uncle passed away yesterday from cancer, we weren't close to him but has increased my anxieties tremendously. I have been having slight pains in my breast were the lumps are located and I'm convinced that it means its spreading.. Chemo starts on the 13th July is it strange to look forward to treatment starting? 

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Dear Claudia 

Oh so.glad about your results 

Fancy a  chat .

Please message me .

Would love a chat 

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Community Champion

Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Good news Claudia, thanks for coming back to let us all know. All the best as you go forward. Xx

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Results of my mri scan are through and all appears to be okay. My lymph nodes are fine which is a big relief. 

They need to do another test to see if I have chemo first or an operation first. Not sure which I prefer to be honest xx

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Community Champion

Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

It's been a long time since I set mine up too !! But a lot of people ask about it so I kept a note .

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Community Champion

Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Thanks for that explanation Jill - I had forgotten how I set up private messaging! Xx

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

moderator@breastcancercare.org.uk

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Community Champion

Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

IF you can't see a pink envelope icon in the top right corner your private message facility has not been turned on or enabled .

check you have turned it on 

Click on your avatar ,go to my settings ,preferences ,private messenger ,turn private messages on .

if it is on then e mail the moderators and ask them to enable it .You have to post a few times first so they know you are genuine but they allow you to send messages .

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Community Champion

Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

 
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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Ps - I have sent a message, see if you get it. You will either get an email telling you I have messaged you or click the pink envelope at the top right of your screen and that takes you to messages.

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Community Champion

Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Oh no you are not thick!! I may well have given you wrong advice on how to send a private message as technology is not my strong point. I’ve just gone onto the home page of the forum and found the following advice on how to send a private message - which I’ll try to post below

https://forum.breastcancernow.org/t5/How-to-get-started/Private-groups-and-messaging/m-p/1273834#M50

It does say that it takes a while for new users to be able to send private messages as they want to check the new user is genuine. I’ll see if I can send you a private message and if it works you just have to hit the “reply” button. Fingers crossed.....xx

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hello Evie.

Thanks alot for the info and reassuarance. 

Really kind of you. 

I am such a nerd tried to private message you but the message option does not come up when I tap on your name 😥

I believe I am.logged in just thick!!

Please feel free to message me and I can respond .

 

 

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Community Champion

Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hi Mwe, a welcome hug from me too. As I said to Claudia I’m happy to answer any questions you too might have, or if you want to send a private message. 
I hope you have worked out how to send private messages but in case you haven’t try this. Click on the person’s name who you wish to message and there should be a box to click on to say “send a message”. You need to be logged in to be able to send and see such messages. As Jill said, it’s best not to give any private or personal details on this part of the forum as it’s public. 
my best wishes to you too, Evie xx

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Definitely will do 

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Fingers crossed for your surgery, please keep me updated with everything. I'll feel better once I have my mri scan and treatment plan until then I feel like I'm in limbo 

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hello Claudia .

Yes I have had scans and MRI done xx.

 

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hello Jill 

Thanks for that response .

Thanks for advice on messaging too .

So grateful that you have taken time to volunteer and help other ladies in this situation  too .

Lots of hugs 

 

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Thanks alot Claudia. 

I am glad you feel better today .

Will  try phone the nurses. 

So nice reading your message .

Lots of hugs 

 

 

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Welcome to the forum ladies - good luck with your treatment.Mwe if you want to speak privately to another forum user you can send private messages via the forum and that person will get an e mail alert .Dont put your phone number on the forum as it is public and anyone can see it .I think you may need check private messages are turned on in your settings .Jill x

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hi mwe, the nurses on this charity page are excellent I rang them yesterday and calmed me straight down. Have you had a biopsy and mri scan? I'm in a better place today I'm trying to keep positive as so many people survive breast cancer. Take it step by step and remain positive xx

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Dear Claudia 

In exact portion as you .

I am a nurse and the little knowledge is driving me insane .

I am.not copping at all .

I.feel like I need constant reassurance .

This are such hard times .

You can chat to.me privately but not sure how to go.anout it.

Would love a chat with anyone just to calm my nerves. 

Claudia we are in this together. 

You are not on your own .

Can I.write my number on here?

Not sure very new to this forum sorry 

 

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hi Claudia,

sorry you find yourself here. I second what the other ladies have said. I found from diagnosis to surgery then results and more investigations I felt totally out of control. I met with the oncologist on Wednesday and honestly it was like a weight had been lifted of my shoulders. I have decisions to make (re chemo) but I feel like I have regained some control. I’ve slept so much better the past couple of nights. 

Once there is a treatment plan in place lots of the unknowns have been answered. 

I hope all goes well for you on Wednesday 

Mel xx

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Thank you ladies, I guess its all natural, you do fear the worst. I have an mri scan on Monday and then my consultation on Wednesday with a treatment plan. Once that is all over I'm sure I'll be in a bit of a better and calmer place xx

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hi Claudia,

I cannot add anything to the excellent advice you have already been given. I called the helpline today and feel much better for it so I would certainly recommend them. 

I have previously had cervical cancer and the diagnosis was a huge shock. I can empathise with how you are feeling.  I know it is a different situation but when I knew that my treatment plan was a hysterectomy I felt more in control and thankfully I had no evidence of spread so that was it over. 

I wish you all the very best. 

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Dear Claudia, 

I know the first shock causes such an avalanche of emotions but it is doable, I promise. And the fear becomes less frequent companion with time. All the wonderful BC survivors who have already answered are right; total uncle Google ban, solution focus approach, not reading horrid stories as most will not apply to you and you have got it girl! We are so lucky that medicine has moved so much in this field and the prognosis have changed so significantly. I was diagnosed in August last year and yes, there have been many difficult moments but on the whole I think my assumptions about the treatment were all proven wrong; even the chemo was not half as bad as I anticipated. You might not even have the chemo (depending on the BC biology) and there is laughter, love and so much more during and after cancer! We are all here for you whenever you need a chat, rant, cry or laugh. x Anna 

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hi Claudia, so sorry you are in this situation. As Evie says this is such a hard time, a shock and waiting is horrible. Time will pass and I think it gets easier once you have a plan. Try not to jump to conclusions about what treatment you will need, avoid all the cancer horror stories., and Do Not Google!! There are lots of us here who have had our treatment and are out the other side and fine now. It's good you are having scans so they can decide what treatment will be best for you, there are many types of breast cancer and variations. This forum is great for support and advice and ive found the nurses are lovely and really helpful if you want to talk. Good luck, love Mo x

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hi Claudia3609

Welcome to the Breast Cancer Now Forum.

We're sending you all our love ahead of your scan on Monday. Remember our team is here if you need to chat about anything! 

Bernard

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

You really won’t drive anyone mad on here, so please don’t think that. It’s great to offload on here then you can stay positive for your sons.

There is a good book that I bought after it was recommended to me on here called “The Cancer Survivor’s Companion by Frances GoodHart and Lucy Atkins. In there they advise “The first thing to know is: thoughts aren’t facts. A worried thought is just your interpretation: it is NOT a fact”. You have to remember that breast cancer is very treatable, the treatments aren’t always easy but they are doable. And you may not need everything on offer.

If you can, and it’s easier said than done, try to set aside say half an hour of “worry time” then lock up the worry until the next day. It’s a time to be gentle and with yourself, lots of treats and whatever helps you.

You are very welcome to send me a private message any time if there are things you would like to say or ask that you would rather not put on the main chat. Whatever works best for you. Xx

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Thank you Evie I will probably very active on here and drive people mad 😬 I've 2 young boys so need to remain positive for them. I just need help to remain grounded and not think the worst xx

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Re: Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hi Claudia - I’m so sorry to read your news, but you have come to exactly the right place for support and help. First of all I’m sending you a massive hug. The diagnosis day and then waiting for results and a treatment plan are the hardest days - I know I felt as if I had been hit by a truck. It’s good that the biopsy didn’t show node involvement and I hope the MRI will confirm that.

I had a mastectomy (I’m similar size cup to you) plus chemo, node involvement and radiotherapy - so happy to answer any questions you might have once you know your plan.

Best advice given to me was to take one day at a time and not to google as you will scare yourself. Chat away on here and ask questions, it’s a safe and non judgemental place and everyone gets what you are feeling without you having to explain.

My very best wishes to you.

Evie xx

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Diagnosed yesterday and scared

Hi I'm a newbie

I had the results of my biopsy, ultrasound and mammogram yesterday. I have 2 lumps which are adjacent so are being treated as 1 30mm lump, a b cup (so I'm guessing a mastectomy!) biopsy said my lymph nodes are okay. Mri scan is on Monday so I guess that will say if lymph nodes are fine or not. I'm just scared my body doesn't seem to stop shaking no matter what I do to try and resolve it. I was okay yesterday but watched a programme on TV whereby a man's daughter has breast cancer had it removed but it travelled to her head now I'm a complete mess. I'm just looking for guidance, lots of support and virtual hugs