First Chemo

Hello Everyone,

I was diagnosed in October and had lumpectomy in November. First chemo was last Thursday and I was so afraid but so far I’ve been ok. I’m trying the cool cap I know it my hair will go eventually but I’m aiming to keep it for as long as I can! I’ve spent years moaning about my hair and now it seems so precious. It seems a silly thing to be worried about in the face of everything else but honestly I became so focused on it I just couldn’t stop bawling! It was all such a shock. No symptoms, nothing just routine mammogram that I wasn’t going to attend because we were so busy at work! Thank God my boss insisted because I would have forgotten to rebook! I’ve got six sessions of chemo and then radiotherapy. Now frightened at the thought of the scan after third session. Terrified to be honest. Does anyone else feel the same

Hi LesleyH - first of all, I’m sending you a big hug and wanted to welcome you to this lovely forum. I am really sorry to read about your diagnosis, but glad that you are under way with your treatment. You might want to join the January 2021 monthly chemo thread - have a look under the “going through treatment” board or hopefully this link will work forum.breastcancernow.org/t5/Chemotherapy-monthly-threads/January-2021-Chemo-Starters/m-p/1351386#M160811 or you could join February if you prefer, I think that has also been set up.

But I would reassure you that it isn’t at all silly to worry about losing your hair, it’s very very normal. A friend used the cold cap and kept a lot of her hair. It didn’t work so well for me, but I think that was because the cap wasn’t fitted properly - so do get your nurse to check that the cap is fitted snugly.

Don’t beat yourself up about having a good cry. It feels like you have been hit by a truck that came out of nowhere. When I was going through chemo a wise lady on here advised me to take things a day at a time, or sometimes even one hour at a time when the going got particularly tough. So try not to look too far ahead at the scan, and focus if you can on looking after yourself today, lots of kindness and treats. That is of course easier to say than to put into practice - I found things more manageable once I had discovered the monthly chemo sessions on here and could share day to day feelings with others at the same stage.

If I can help with any questions please ask. I wish you all the best for the rest of your chemo and hope it will be kind to you - everyone reacts differently to it. Hugs, Evie xx