I’ve just been diagnosed and feeling scared

I’ve just been diagnosed on 28.10.19 and feeling very scared about my journey. Waiting to find out if I’m positive to take herceptin with chemo then surgery or surgery then chemo. Been referred to see plastic surgeon. I’m 47 and single and have lost both my parents. I have amazing friends who are all there for me and my work have been amazing already. I’m doing my best to stay positive but I am writing this at 06.15 as I’ve been awake since 5am woke up and could not get back to sleep then cried and had a how do I get through this conversation with myself I’m sure that’s normal. I’m going away today for a few days with my 7 friends to a lovely lodge in the country which will be good for me I’m sure before all the treatment starts. Just need  some words of support to help me on this journey. ?

Hello Karen ,welcome to the forum .5am is just the worst time isn’t it - I posted many times on this forum in the middle of the night when I was first diagnosed .The first few weeks are really tough but it does get easier once you know exactly what you are dealing with and what your treatment plan is - then you can get on with getting rid off the ****** !! There is lots of advice and support on this forum from people who really understand.Jill x 

Hi Karen I too am in the same boat as you, diagnosed 31.10.19 and feeling really scared of whats to come, I am 55 married with two children and a young grandson, where as you being single must be frightened of being alone I am frightened of having people around as I don’t want to hurt them, I guess with the sledgehammer that smashed us both for 6 with the dreaded “C” word these thoughts are all natural. The dread of surgery is bad enough, the recovery and what I might expect also, but the wait for the results will be the worst. I don’t feel like food but know I need to be physically prepared for my op this friday, mentally is a different ball game. Not sure when your surgery is but mine is really quick within a week so enjoy this weekend with your friends and try to keep positive which is all any of us can do. Sending hugs and kisses to you xx

Hi Karen, after diagnosis is a very scary time and like Jill said, you find yourself awake at all hours in the night.  It’s a lot to take in, both in terms of accepting your diagnosis and the treatment.  It’s like landing on another planet.  I was diagnosed in March 2017 stage 3 including lymph nodes and had chemo, surgery and radiotherapy and I’m still here and doing very well.  I’m glad you have wonderful friends to support you and hope you feel less anxious once your treatment plan in underway.  You can chat with others on the “going through treatment” threads once you know a bit more.  Don’t feel you have to stay positive all the time, you can still get through it with the odd melt down!  I think staying focussed is more important as you’ll be on a fairly regimented schedule for treatment.  I hope you manage to get a better nights sleep.   Sending hugs, xx