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New member

4 REPLIES 4
Katz2407
Member

Re: New member

Hey,

i’m so sorry you had to deal with this, feeling out of control is the worst thing and is where I am at right now, i specified my issues and what I wanted to the docs and they did what I specifically told them not to anyway.

I’d love to know how you got your head around this as i’m So angry I don’t think I can even speak to any more docs right now.

How did it work out, did you get what you wanted in the end? Good luck 

thanks a lot. 

delly
Member

Re: New member

Dear Fiona2018

 

My X next door but one neighbour opted to have a bi-lateral mastectomy. She had to fight for/to have it done, but eventually the surgeon gave in. I think she had to undergo a Psychiatric or Psychotherapy evaluation before they agreed. Look into that Fiona. Your BCN should be able to advise. 

If she can't, and you are so determined and adament to have a Bi-lat, I would postpone it and consult as many avenues about it as possible, before agreeing to something you don't want. Have you considered approaching/ consulting your local MacMillans to discuss.

I can feel your upset, but how about trying to convert it to "fight" for what you want.

I reeeally do hope you get somewhere with your struggle, girl.

Lotsa love, Delly xxxx

fiona2018
Member

Re: New member

Yes i have just joined their FB groups x

pastasmissus
Member

Re: New member

That is such a bummer! Do you know about the group flatfriends? It's for people who don't have reconstruction. There are lots of similar stories from people trying to get the other breast removed for symmetry.

fiona2018
Member

New member

Hello i was diagnosed on the 21 December with NST grade 2 ER+6 stage 2 breast cancer. After having a breast MRI after initial mamograms/ultrasound/biopsies they found a second tumor in the same breast. I have also in each breast 2 fibroadenomas. I was told that i would have to have a mastectomy on my left breast. More or less from the begining i decided that for many reasons that reconstruction was a route that i did not want to go down. 
I have other health issues as i suffer from Fibromyalgia, osteoarthritis and a compressed disk in my neck, im also a single parent i have 5 children 3 are now grown up and left home, but i have a 14 year old Daughter and a 7 year old Son with Autisum who live with me. Im also a large lady with large breast apparently a 44H re measured myself yesterday. 
Taking all of my health/family/size issues and the fact that i have fibroadenoma in right breast which is the way things started in left breast and that im prone to cysts in my breasts that i wanted a bi-later mastectomy.
My desicion for a bi-later mastectomy has been totally support by my family and my GP who know me and my circustances. My BCN understands my reasons, but the problem started when i met my surgeon on Monday. I spent ages explaining how due to all my health/personal issues meant that i was wanting a bi-lateral mastectomy and that having just one surgery what i wanted and that i understoon the risks of complication/infections that come with any surgery. He said he was not comfortable doing this, and had i even seen a plastic surgeon about reconstruction. Had already told him a number of times that this was not what i wanted. I asked him why a woman who wanted immediate reconstruction and to have other breast done so that they were as even as possible, but that a woman who wants a bi-later mastectomy cant have it done when one breast is healthy. His answer was "some women find the thought of loosing a breast so traumatic that immediate reconstruction and surgery on healthy breast is offered. But i was at the other end of the scale as i wanted my breast removed" I found this very offensive as if my trauma of going through BC and having to loose a breast was much less than other women. By this time i was crying and he just would not accept any of my reason. Only positive is that he said that one my treatment was finished and i was healed he would remove other breast in a reasonable time scale.
I asked what my options were as i was not happy with this, he said he would as his professor for his opinion on this. And that i could get a second opinion.
That was monday, i saw my GP on tuesday and she agreed that a bi-lateral mastectomy is the best thing for me. She asked me to ring her Wednesday once i had heard back about what was happening. Wednesday came and in the post i had a letter from the surgeon saying both him and the prof were in agreement and that they would go ahead with a single mastectomy. I was in floods of tears when my GP rang me back, and she stepped in to try and help by talking to my BCN who then spoke to the other breast surgeon at the hospital who also would not do a bi-later, she then looking into possible soloutions and so have i but we have both drawn a blank as the next closest hospital surgeons are all in favour and specialise in reconstruction.
I have been really ill all week with a major flare up of my fibromyalgia, hardly slept and have found it difficult to cope with anything.
So yesterday i had to give in and agree to a single mastectomy for now. Date for surgery i will get on Monday.
Im really upset and angry about the whole situation, but i dont have a choice.
Thanks for listening.