Hi all
I was diagnosed last week with triple negative breast cancer. The plan is to have chemotherapy first and then surgery. I have a 3 year old. Does anyone have any advice on how to prepare your child for you being unwell with chemo and changes in appearance please? Obviously I am well at the moment so trying to do as much fun stuff as possible right now. I was thinking about chopping my hair quite short in preparation for potential hair loss. Any other tips you can think of?
Many thanks x
Hi Amyluella, welcome to this site where no one wants to be. You will find plenty of help here on a wide range of questions. If you can, scroll through previous posts and you will find some super support from members about top tips pre and post treatment. For your child, I would suggest downloading the support leaflet from this site. I passed that PDF to my son, who used it with his children. From your post I assume it is a given that you will lose your hair? Some chemo is more toxic , and in that case you might be wise to trim now, then go for the shave later. However , you may wish to consider the cold cap, and your Onco and BC nurse can advise you. I didn’t use that as I felt I wanted the chemo over as quickly and painlessly as possible. Once I was told I would lose my hair with my treatment (EC-T) I was given a wig voucher and I chose my wig immediately. I matched it to my current look and it was wonderful. No one knew I was undergoing treatment . Great fir morale.
it is all very emotional when you are first diagnosed, but once your team, and you, have a plan in place then you can get down to getting ready. You may want to look at diet so that your body is as fit as possible for the influx of meds you will get. In addition, changing lotions and potions, shampoo etc to those without parabans might be something to think about. Underwear and pj’s will need adding to. Soft cotton, boneless bras, and button front pj’s so the nurses can check you post surgery. Again, plenty if help on here. All of us react differently to the treatments, so do look at the information leaflets on here as there is one for every situation. Big piece of advice - Google is NOT a doctor!
I wish you all the best on this difficult, but very doable, journey. X ?
Hi Amylouella, Sorry you find yourself here. It seems unfair that your fun is being challenged with your young child but I promise you will laugh again even whilst on treatment. I had chemo first then surgery and then radiotherapy. I think the thing you dislike with this method is that you have to keep the tumour inside your body which goes against your instincts to get the hell rid of it as quickly as possible. I had enough shrinkage from chemo to get clear margins for surgery so it was all worth it. You may want to have a read of this brochure to help prepare your child for what you are about to go through; breastcancercare.org.uk/information-support/publication/mummys-lump-bcc164
Here is my story which has lots of tips on how I coped at each stage; lifeafterlola.com
Once your treatment plan is in place, you can chat with others going through the same on the “going through treatment” thread. I found this really helpful.
sending hugs. xxx
Hi Amyluella,
Sorry you’ve found yourself here. I’ve no advice, just wanted to say I’m in a similar position.
I’m 37 with a 19 month old. In a way, I guess I’m lucky that he’s too young to understand and hopefully won’t remember much about it all!
I haven’t got my treatment plan yet but know it will include surgery (not sure to what extent) and chemo and/or radiotherapy are very likely too, I have also thought if I get to that, will cut my hair short before it comes out.
My niece was 7 when my mum had cancer and lost her hair, mum wasn’t expecting her to visit so was sat with no hair (she used to always put a wig on when she was coming), my niece ran in, saw her and just said ‘can I feel your head granny?’, the way kids cope with these things amazes me!
Good luck with everything x