68.5K members
1.2M posts
cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Recently Diagnosed and scared.

19 REPLIES 19
Kip
Community Champion
Community Champion

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Well done Bea, glad all well. Rest up
jayney234
Member

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Try not to be scared, I know that sounds easy to say but I was the scardiest cat around when I was diagnosed.  I decided on a mastectomy on my right side and to be honest the op was a lot better and less painful than I thought.  I went on to have chemo and rads but survived it all.  Don't dwell on too much, just concentrate on one event at a time.  You will get there and you will be amazed at how strong you are.  I am 5 years down the road now and although the fear never goes away, I look back and marvel at how I coped with it all.  Good luck, you will be fine. x

Mai7
Community Champion

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Onwards and upwards Beatrice.  Well done.  Keep up the physio to keep the movement in your arm.  Sending hugs. xx

JaneBelinda
Member

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Aw Bea....so pleased for you.

ladybowler
Community Champion

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Bea

 

Wat a lovely reassuring post for  those ladies who will come along after you to see how well you are doing.

 

Onwards and upwards now, make sure you get plenty of rest and I am sure from the sound of it you are being well looked after by your family and friends.

 

Helena xxx

Beatrice321
Member

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Hello again lovely Ladies,

 

Four days ago on the 6th June I had my Mastectomy.

It's such a relief!

 

That was the scariest most awful decision I've ever had to make. My heart was telling me that the scarier option was the best one for me. "But it's terrifying!" said my head "But it's right" said my heart. And all of that inner conversation with a heart and a head in shock and neither thinking in a straight line.

 

Thank you so much for helping me find the strength to listen to what my heart was telling me. The advice and help I’ve had here and from my friends and family by my side has been invaluable.

 

I see now that I had to make this decision. I wanted someone else to make it for me. To tell me what to do. But no. It had to be mine. And my decision may not be right for the next lady in need.

 

So listen to the advice, help and support and then listen to yourself. It’s tough, but you’ll see too. It’s the only way to approach this.

 

Ooo and btw. A mastectomy is not nearly as painful as I feared. I have plenty of morphine, but don’t really seem to be needing it. Hhhmm. Glad it’s there tho, just in case.

 

Bea xx

 

 

Kip
Community Champion
Community Champion

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Hi Beatrice, hope you're doing well.  Kip xx

Mai7
Community Champion

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Hi Beatrice, I had no choice, I had to have mx and I'm on delayed reconstruction due to my high recurrence risk, so I have to wait a year.  its hard mentally but I'm alive and that's the important thing.  Whatever you decide be happy with your decision once it's made and make sure it's a fully informed decision. Don't be afraid to keep asking your consultant questions to satisfy your mind. X

Beatrice321
Member

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Heya,

Thank you so much for all the kind and very helpful words. I'm feeling stronger each day. And each friend I tell feels like another ally.

I'm eager for my op now. I wanna get this done, whatever "this" is. MX I think.

Bea

Fairy Dust
Member

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Just read your thread Bea. Whatever you choose for yourself, you will be right. I had two small lumps and an area of DCIS. They would have done a therapeutic mamoplasty at the beginning, but I decided I wanted the added security (real or just perceived) of the mastectomy. I also wanted the immediate reconstruction, DIEP flap. Due to the recon its took a bit longer to get things in place, but I'm I'm 5weeks post op now. I've had my results and no rads or chemo, just hormone therapy. I'm healing well and can already see the potential of my new boobies, particularly as I'm 57 and my new ones haven't had the years of gravity to deal with yet! Good luck xxx

Beatrice321
Member

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Heya,

I didn't have an MRI. Not sure why, but looking around on this forum it seems some do and some don't. No doubt that the team know why.

 

Love the pun BTW.Smiley Very Happy

Bea

JaneBelinda
Member

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Hi Bea, did you have an MRI? That’s what I am waiting for. 

No matter, that’s great you can cut to surgery quick (scuse the pun! X) Wishing you all the best xo

Beatrice321
Member

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Hi,

 

Thank you so much for the words of support. They mean a lot.

I've spoken to my BCN and she's been wonderful.

Turns out I'm Stage 2 they think.

I've only had a biopsy so far so they can't be too definate on it's specifics until it's been removed.

 

Because my lump is so small, I don't need chemo to shrink it before surgery. So the surgery is happening fast. Thank goodness, but.......wow it's fast.

 

I think I’ve decided to have a mastectomy, but I don’t have to make it official until Tuesday, the operation is next Wednesday. Mastectomy was my knee jerk reaction when they told me.  So I’ve been trying to get all the info I can to make sure it’ wasn't just a knee jerk reaction. I don’t think it was. I think the security (real or imagined doesn’t matter to me) that I’ve done everything I can to get rid of it will help me in the future.

Bea

 

 

JaneBelinda
Member

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

It’s hard I know but...please don’t be too scared. I’ve just been diagnosed too and am waiting for my MRI and next week will be the longest of my life I think! Looking at the statistics, 50k of us are diagnosed each year. That equates to roughly just under 200 EVERY WEEKDAY. I put that into perspective and am actually getting my head around the fact that thankfully I HAVE been diagnosed...cos it wouldn’t have gone away 🙂

Not trying to preach or sound patronising...try to think of yourself among us special ones. We will get through this together...❤️

Im new to this journey too but there are some lovely people on here to hold our hands and guide us along xxx

Kip
Community Champion
Community Champion

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Hi Beatrice,   Definately ask more questions of your BCN and team before making a decision.   I couldn't remember all the details I was told initially but I requested another meeting with my BCN and consultant and we discussed all the options of surgery and I was shown photos of various reconstructions, masectomies etc which really helped.  I found writing a list of all my questions (no matter how silly they may seem) was really helpful, I took it along and worked my way down it, writing down the answers for when I got home.  Take someone with you, an extra pair of ears is always good.  Things will improve for you once you have some answers, unfortunately tests etc do take time and the waiting is awful.   Keep talking to everyone you can, especially on here.  Take care, big hug Kip xx

Beatrice321
Member

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Hi all,

Thank you so much for the welcome and advice, it's heartening to know that I won't have to go through this alone. I know I have the support of family and friends, but friends on here who also have knowledge and experience will be invaluable.

This choice I have been given is awful. Mastectomy or Lumpectomy, I think I'd rather they just told me what they'd recommend, after all they're the ones with the training and knowledge.

Yep, I'll  see what my BCN says tomorrow.

Bea

Jobey68
Member

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Hi Bea, welcome to the forum 😊 It's hard to take in everything that is said at the initial diagnosis but they should have given you some indication of the type and grade from your biopsy so certainly ring the clinic tomorrow to ask your BCN for more information.

Also a small tumour wouldn't necessarily warrant a mastectomy so I would question why they have suggested it as it's more usual to be told you don't need one.

 

It is a hell of a shock in the beginning but you will get your head around it all and a big help is to know the facts. There is plenty of advice and support across the forum so ask anything you want to know Xx Jo 

 

 

ann-m
Community Champion

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Hi Beatrice,

First of all, welcome to the forum, we’ve all been where you are now & understand what you’re going through at the mo. It is such a shock getting a diagnosis.

You wouldn’t necessarily have all the info yet, as often further investigations are needed to get the diagnosis absolutely right, but do check with your BCN as we often don’t take it all in initially. Normally, the biopsy will show the type of bc it is & possibly the grade or whether it is hormone positive. The final results don’t usually come through until the whole thing has been looked at, in the lab after it’s been removed at surgery.

In respect of surgery, see what the team recommends, take it all a stage at a time & try not to leap to far ahead into the ‘what ifs’

Do come & ask anything or chat whenever you need to, between us all, we’ve been through all aspects of treatment here & do use the main bcc site here, as well as the helpline if you need to. 

Anyway, of course it doesn’t feel like it, but thankfully now it’s been diagnosed, it will now be dealt with & you’ll come out the other side, we all do. 

ann x

 

Mai7
Community Champion

Re: Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Hi Beatrice, I'm sorry you find yourself here but glad you found us. It's not unusual to not know the grade and stage after biopsy. I didn't find out fully the grade and stage until after my surgery. It really is a big shock at first and it takes a while to get your head around so just give yourself time.  Try and keep your mind busy with things which will help you once your treatment starts.  It gets easier once your treatment is underway and something is being done.  Here's my story which I hope you can find some comfort from.  It's good to know that others have survived this and I started right where you are now. Scared, very scared. http://lifeafterlola.blogspot.co.uk/

sending hugs. Xx

 

here is the bcc info on surgery: https://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/information-support/facing-breast-cancer/going-through-treatment...

Beatrice321
Member

Recently Diagnosed and scared.

Hello everyone,

 

Last Thursday I was told I have Invasive Ductal. Stunned is an understatement.

 

I know it's small 1.7cm but I don't know anything about the Grade or Stage. It that unusual?

I've been told I can have either a Mastectomy or a Lumpectomy, either is as good. It's small enough not to need chemo first.

 

I'm to speak to my Breast Care Nurse on Thursday to decide on Mastectomy or Lumpectomy.

 

HAving read a few threads on this forum, it seems like I should have a little more info to help me make that impossible decision.

I know I can phone my Breast Care Nurse and will be doing as soon as this Bank Holiday weekend gets out of the way, but for now. I'm just wondering if there was something I missed during that first meeting.

 

Bea