Advice

Hiya,

I had a lumpectomy and lymph node removal at the end of November.  I  feel so alone with this, from the outside I look fine, everything is normal. Inside I am so confused, I had support and now I feel all I have is my husband who is amazing.  My mother very kindly told me I had nothing to worry about, I don’t have cancer anymore so I should be happy not moaning.  Needless to say, I don’t talk to her about it anymore.

Is this all normal or am I just feeling sorry for myself? Should I be happy?

I don’t know what is happening next, I am on Exemestane for 5 years and I was told I would have yearly mammograms.  So does this mean I don’t hear anything else now until November this year?

Hello Callista,

I had the same op, have you had you full course of radiotherapy as you should be having that if not contact the hospital ASAP , if you have well welcome to our world, as there are loads of us lady’s feel the same way I’m very emotional at times, and I still don’t feel like me or a woman , I feel invaded intruders , so yes your emotions will take some time mine are still up and down I still haven’t come to love my body again, as I feel when I look in the mirror it’s like it’s not me I’m not normal I just don’t want to accept what I have been through and it’s hard very hard you just feel like your in la la land, so just try and go for gentle walks with your hubby but not too far as you might tire easily I did so it is baby steps for me but try and do something different each day for yourself , igot myself all dressed up hair done make up on the whole works for someone to say what are you all dressed up for your only going over your sons well that was it for me back to square one so see if people don’t help you it’s a long road and the long road leads to along journey do take care Callista  and I hope you get sorted it is hard but people on here are fab we help each other.

CATT57

Hello Callista

Totally understand all that you have said.  I’m still rocking and rolling on this journey … had tumors removed from both breasts in November, radiotherapy in January. 
From the exterior, I look the same but internally is a different matter.  Happiness hasn’t returned to me yet but I’m working hard to get it again.

During diagnosis and treatment there’s so much to deal with.  Once that’s done, we have to find some sort of acceptance… this is like a grieving process.  Often I find totally conflicting emotions - sad at how my body has changed but thankful to have both breasts… it’s all very confusing!

It takes time … take the time… we are not a switch that goes on and off.

I am much better at listening to my own needs … taking time to reflect is I think part of moving forward.  Am trying to learn to like my changed body … 

I start the moving forward course in a few weeks.  Maybe you’d like to look at that for support.

I’m also using the ‘untire’ app - have found it helpful in considering my energy levels.

Elsewise I’d love to share/swop experiences … it’s good to find someone else in the same boat.

Wishing you all the best …take it step by step

I’m not exactly sure if its normal, I am a breast cancer survivor and it has been a little over a year since my diagnosis. So much has happened since then, having a port placed, chemo infusions, a double mastectomy, breast reconstruction etc. I still don’t feel normal, I got so caught up in the fight that now I’m better and I feel like I don’t know how to cope. I went from thinking I was going to die to surviving and now I’m just lost! I can’t explain what the whole experience did to me emotionally, other people just don’t understand. I don’t know how much my comment will help you other than to let you know your not alone in the way you are feeling. All I can say is KEEP PUSHING, KEEP FIGHTING, get with your doctor and talk about options for depression or anxiety, also ask your doctor to refer you to a therapist. I started counseling and its starting off slow but I think in the long run it will help speaking to someone who is not bias. I wish you the best in your recovery and i pray things get better for you! Sending love and air hugs your way!!!:)