i really cant believe im getting frustrated by a cold , like lily says its suprising things like that get us down after all the other rubbish weve been through. but i think i was enjoying galavanting about and what with my bad back last week, and now this, im just a little ------------------------------------------------------- (some words best left unsaid).
what do you all think about jade? ive always thought she was an ok girl, shes been through a lot in life, but she doesnt really moan, just gets on with it, and she explains the emotions so well, when she talks about discussing things with her children, and wanting to protect them. i really hope she does well.
im trying to imagine you and nicky meeting up tommorow, and for some reason it makes me chuckle. how nice to be able to meet each other after what youve shared online. just look out everyone! i can imagine the mischief you can get up to.
i bet your going to have a big fat cream cake as well. thanks for the thoughts on the job shop lily, someone else had suggested going and paying them a visit. so thats on my agenda soon. anyway have fun tommorow, and report back promptly, dont keep; us in suspence.
everyone else hope your out there getting on with life, i thank god for each and everyday especially since weve finished treatment, just hoping my scans ok on friday
goodnight, sleep tight.
Nicky, I think I have told everyone I know that you are coming, so don't be surprised if people flap curtains to look at you.LOL only joking! Now have I accidentally given you the address for the tank top terror??? What a treat that would be and I'm sure you would get at least a big snog on your neck!! Only joking again, it is the correct address! Hope the traffic is light so you can bomb round the M25 and stay as long as possible. I am really chuffed that you are driving such a long way to meet up and will have your tv appearance primed and ready for you to groan over!! Can't wait!
Julia, I had to laugh, is your first sentence an indication of how rads is taking over your life right now? Hope it stays calm, mine took off on day 16, the day after I finished and had no-one to show it to. Still you can bare it all to that lovely sea breeze if it gets too hot to handle!! It seems your other health issues are going to have to be balanced with the onc's personal preferences on drugs, to find out what is best for you. Hope he comes up with a good plan on Friday. You might check whether he has taken advice from the cardio team as he can't be an expert in that field too. I would have thought that your heart function takes priority right now, especially as your stats are good enough to make a decision to stop Bc treatment now if you needed to. The heart is more black and white than BC when it comes to decisions. good luck anyway.
It feels quite sad as I am doing all my ' going back to work soon' last visits. All the social life I have made at home for 10 months now has to try to fit into my busy work schedule. I hope people will be ok with me not seeing them every week now, just not enough time. Took my Mum out on a trip this morning. I tried a top on that I thought was lovely AND it fitted, most importantly. I came out of the only changing room and Mum said it doesn't do much for you, pointed to the lady waiting next to her and said, she doesn't think it does much for you either! The woman's face was a picture! So I shut the door, counted to 10 and tried to work out why I thought it looked nice when they didn't (possibly just that it fitted), only to hear my Mother telling this woman all about my BC so everyone was staring when I came out! I went straight to the till and bought it anyway!!! Some things I won't miss about going back to work.
Well wishing you all a good week and frost free windscreens.
Have been at work today and then straight to Tesco to get my YD's ingredients for her canape party she is holding for friends on Saturday. She's paying by the way and OH and I just have to make ourselves scarce for a few hours. Having got back late I haven't much to report on other than tomorrow is the BIG Day when Lily and Nicky meet! Just making sure OH has filled the car with petrol and then a lovely scenic drive around the M25 - hardly any stress at all I should think! I'm sure we'll report back but after all we've talked about and experienced I'm hoping it's like meeting a well acquainted (I couldn't say 'old' now could I?) friend. Let's hope the roads are clear so I get to spend more than a few mins there before heading home!
Good luck to all with Tamoxifen prescriptions. Arimidex seems OK and certainly not getting anything like the hot flushes I had at original dx 5 yrs ago and I've been on it long enough for them to have kicked in. can't believe I'm still wearing long sleeves, definitely couldn't when I'd been put on Zoladex 1st time round. Julia - only 3 to go and then I hope you can forget all of this.
Take care all, see you tomorrow Lily for a bigger catch up. Will text you when I'm leaving.
Hi: what a lot to rad. As usual will catch up tomorrow when back in office and can spend a decent amount of time reading all your lovely news.
Meeting with onc was OK. Gave him family heart history - cousins and g/parents dropping dead with heart attacks between 40/55, etc. Wasn't too worried about that with me as was more concerned about my heart muscles than arteries. Unfortunately my heart beats so quickly the MUGA scan couldn't take proper pictures so need ECG, waiting for appointment. Have been for blood test today for everything including thyroid and cholesterol to see which hormone I get. He did think we may go staight to arimidex but will know after test results - will see him again this Friday. One thing I have never been convinced about were my survival stats, Angie you came up with some good answers to that some time ago. He said that my 67% was post op and that chemo would 10%, rads 5% and herceptin 5% which would get me up to top 80's - wow, that's better. I guess the hormone stuff will make a contribution too. Not sure I will be able to have Herceptin due to the heart thing but will sort that out over the next coupleof weeks.
So far the frying seems OK - bit pink and itchy but nothing else. Have no 12 of 15 today, it does seem to have gone by quickly but it is still a pain driving there and back. Never mind, nearly over. WIll look out for the porpopolis aloe vera, I have just got the ordingary stuff.
WIll chat more tomorrow when I can read all the fab stuff you have been up to.
Nicky, I am nearly being sick laughing about being a mass murderer!! I guess all the warnings to the girls about strangers and chat rooms backfired on you! At least they are wise to reality which should keep them safer. Tell them I am so short and unfit that you could hold me off with one finger IF NECESSARY!!! Shall I fax my CRB certificate over??
What a hoot! Had my hair redyed today, just in time for your visit. Hairdresser said I have loads more hair now and even better there is a lot of new growth still coming through - wish it was on my head.LOL LOL! Not long to go now!!
Lorraine hope that cold goes soon. I had a cough and found I was really impatient and annoyed that I had it. You wouldn't think we would bat an eyelid after what we have been through would you? How is your back? Victor is still doing his John Travolts impersonation and thinks they are helping. I drove him to the station today and yesterday but he is going to attempt to travel solo tomorrow on the 5am train. I think he forgets about it at work so better to have a distraction. His firm are really busy so he needs to get back. Have you been to the job centre about work? I think if you are actively looking for work, you could get some benefit until then and also they have cash help when you start a job.Worth asking as I found they were quite eager to help 'people covered by the disability act.'
Lisa hope you have a fab time at the show and what a lovely idea to take people to it. I would love to see it, can't wait to hear all about it.I have a lot of work sorting my things out as they left a 23 year old male in my area! Argh. it didn't look like my little home any more. The only thing not removed were the photos of my children on the wall. Have you asked for a good chair for your back yet? Do you think you will manage a holiday at all this year? I think we all deserve a break but easier said than done sometimes.
Angie, I think I need a memory transplant some days. It is multi tasking that I can't do very well now. I also can't have a conversation with one person while listening to another, which is a skill that was invaluable when teaching. Hope your Nan gets on ok. I am a bit cynical about politicians as yet to see one that does what they say they will. Reality checks in when they realise that it is impossible to please everyone, especially as America is such a diverse country. They are so far behind us in many ways. Anyway so glad to hear you have something to get your teeth into and hope the move goes really smoothly. Get that broadband sorted asap so we can hear from you. Hope the nolvadex continues to be nice to you.
Bev I am glad your return to work went well too and take it easy for a while. I think if you said the consultant is happy for you to change or even stronger that you have discussed it and onc agrees, the GP will go along with it. They are not usuallly very knowledgable and if he/she says no ask for something to prevent the flushes. I jus think yoiu really push your symptoms if they don't agree straight away. Soon they will be free anyway so will make no difference to the GP surely? Great to think we can all get them free soon, as well as all our other prescriptions, about time too. If not try Angie's tactic in Boots.
Julia how is the tanning going? Hope you are not going up in smoke like I felt I was. You must be through it all soon, what a great thought.
Well must just catch some of celebrity big brother to watch them all arguing and being pretty pathetic! I still keep watching it though.
Bev. I just had a prescription for Tamoxifen but went to boots and kicked up a fuss. Nolvadex-D is a form of tamoxifen and I essentially said I don't want extra side effects and I'm not leaving until they give me my chosen brand as I had been told that the side effects would be lower in me
I didn't tell then that it was here that I knew that I just said "Isn't Nolvadex-D tamoxifen"... yes he said. "That's the one I want" I glared. repeat until they cave, best done when there's a queue of people with colds looking sorry for you LOL.
he also said that I'm now on their system and will automatically be given the same thing next time so if in doubt and you really want Nolvadex go to boots with a stern face.
oh yes Lily ofcourse the famous Nicky!! that will be good. So glad you too have been able to return to work and move back into the real world and not the horrible place we have all been for the last 6 months or more. I had my first day back today and got on o.k. and it was lovely to see everyone my only problem is the tamoxifen is causing me to feel really really cold inside one minute and then hot flushes the next. This happened in Tenerife too so it is not down to our horrible weather! although that doesn't help. I saw the Onc yesterday and told him that I would like to try Nolvadex instead but he implied I might have trouble getting it and would need to check with my GP so I have made myself an appointment for Friday. I will have a blood test done soon to check on my hormonal level now and then see the Onc again in Nov to check it again with a view to swapping to an aramotose inhibitor if post menopausal. I will have a mammagram in May (aghhhhhh that will be the anniversary) and then I believe also see the surgeon for a physical. So I have a few months of nomality to forget it all once I can get these side effects under control.
Good luck Angie you sound as if you have your work cut out for you. I agree Obama was amazing let's just hope he is the man he appears to be and doesn't get tainted along the way.
Lisa hope the arm is improving have they given you lots of exercises to do to help it?
Love to all
Wow - amazing about Obama - let's hope he's the gift that everyone thinks and hopes he is. Quite emotional watching it unlike when Dubbl - ya was sworn in!
I've also been busy with work (today) and treatment (yesterday). A busy week with my A list visit to the folks in Essex!
Lisa hope the arm improves. Also I get headaches, I'm sure it's Arimidex and I too think of Brain mets, which is even scarier for me as my mets are already here, arghhhhh. I'm sure another cause of mine is tension and stress from the past year. I've had stress headaches before and I can definitely feel my shoulders being very tense. I need a massage and have to chase up my local hospice who give them for free to us mets girls.
Angie - busy or what? Understand if you're not in touch, lots going on and really hope your Nan is doing OK.
Bev - how's the tan. I remember having one of those once - don't they happen in what's known as the sun? Hope it's not been back to earth with a bump but a gentle glide!
Lorraine - never rains but it pours doesn't it? Hope you are resting up and get the back seen to soon. ALso that the scans show no further problems.
Julia - hope you are ok and keeping busy?
Lily - not long now! Please don't be a mass murderer - my girls are quite concerned about my internet meetup 😉
Bye for now, gotta sort out food for the hoards - well OH and 1 daughter!
That's better, Nana's back on a normal ward and Obama was just sworn in so today's got a *lot* better.... phew.
Lily, glad you got back to school and saw everyone, at least that's done now and you can move on to whatever new normal you want.
Now's a really good time to read up on CoQ10 if you haven't, I've been taking it to help get my cognitive powers back, it's supposed to help memory and conversion of food to energy. It's just a vitamin but I think it may be helping. I notice if I forget to take it for a few days.
Hope to catch up with the thread in a few days, it's mad here. Moving house in a week, work's gone mad because there's a big vote in Parliament on Thursday on MP's expenses, looks like some of them are trying to stop the publication of that data, and they tried to do it sneakily so we have 1 week to tell the world before they get away with it.
Nan's still in hospital and I'm hoping to see her later this week, looks like all 4 heart valves are leaking. It's not good at all, nothing short of a miracle. In the darker moments I fear the my Mum may loose her mother and daughter this year but I'm determined if I have anything to do with it that won't happen and my Nan's made of tough stuff too.
Stay warm and well ladies and don't worry if I'm quiet it'll be work/family/moving/weddings/dog/walking/moving... did I mention moving.... Wah
Loads of love
Good luck with going back Lily - its wierd but nice - I like to be in control so hate that I wasnt and others had been tampering but back in control now!
Well enjoy your TV Star guest!
Oh, forgot to tell you all, i visited a web site called applause store where you can apply for free tickets for shows - got 8 free tickets for Britian's Got Talent tomorrow in Glasgow so Im off to see Ant and Dec and Simon Cowell etc. - sad but excited. Decided to take some family down as a little thank you!!!!
best wishes lily on your return to work, i have a cold now, so i will just have to chill out what with that and me back everytime i sneeze i dont know if to hold my back or cross me legs cause the bladders a bit weak at the moment. i feel ive aged in a very short space of time. goodnight god bless x
Bev, surely you guessed who the tv star is, or have you forgotten (Nicky)? The holiday sounds fab and I am so jealous about sun, I could just soak it up. Keep us posted how it goes with the onc. I really don't know why but some docs seem to want to see people more often. Will let you know what goes on but think it is touchy feely. Can't wait!!!
Lisa I have been told by the research nurse that brain mets are rare from Bc and that is why they allow us to use the cold cap. No consolation to poor people who get them though. I think the level of worrying we have is enough to give anyone a headache. Try chilling out and remember some huge % of headaches can be cured by drinking water as being a bit dehydrated can cause them. Not sure if that works but an easy remedy to test out at least. Good luck and hope they soon go. How did today go Nicky? You should have some weeks of freedom now. Roll on Thursday!
Hi to everyone else on here and hope you are ok.
Well I had my big return to work today, all planned to a tee. Dropped Victor at the station to try a short day at work and went on to school for a quiet meeting and visit to see some members of staff. Next thing, the fire alarm goes off and so all 1200 of the kids see me as we line up for the fire registers. What a hoot! I had lots and lots of hugs, ignored by a couple of people, and managed to stay grinning and not get emotional, thank goodness. Actually I did not feel sad at all but absolutely shattered when i got home afterwards. Someone has bust my laptop so oh dear I have a brand new one waiting for my return! I had forgotten how disgustingly like mud the cheap coffee tastes like though. Most of my things have been chucked around by the newest tenent of my desk and all my notes taken down, argggh my brains! Still they say they are going to let me do very little for the 2 weeks before half term and would I be happy to sit in the office. Yes! It will be great as I should be able to poodle about and work out where everything has moved to in my absence. Also got to shake my department up a lot as a lot of people have done bits and bobs while I was away. Didn't think it was the right time to ask for a rise!! LOL.
Hiya Bev, swelling I noticed in my elbow but my upper arm always seemed slightly larger since surgery - its 3cm bigger near the top but from elbow down its all the same, smaller in one case!!!
Lily headaches banging a bit and although not dizzy inside my head feels a bit dizzy, got worried a bit about brain mets but will take some pracetomal and see what happens!!!! Also might go and get eyes tested just in case!!
Lily good news re the job hope you get sorted!!!
Now Lily you can't leave us in suspense like that! who is it?? I went to Tenerife for my hols which is a great place to go for some winter sun as they get sunshine all yaer around how unfair is that! Sorry to hear your family have beein going through the illnesses it is such a horrible time of year of all the bugs hopefully this really cold weather will kill a few off (not people! the bugs) I too have a large lump under my scar but I assume that is scar tissue and will take a time to disperse if indeed it ever does go completely. Interesting that you see the Surgeon again I only saw mine prior to chemo and will not see her now until June? seems a long time but I guess they know what they are doing. Likewise I still have swelling of my index finger and thumb that really has never gone down so I am hoping that too is post surgery and will eventually sort itself out and on the dreaded L, I did see a lympodema nurse about it and she measured my arm and it is bigger than the other so she has suggested I have a sleeve to wear when I am doing heavy work (me doing heavy work where did at come from) such as gardening or heavy duty housework well I certainly wont have to worry about the housework but I do love my gardening so will follow instructions. I will be interested to learn what others are advised.
Lisa did your swelling begin in the hand? I hope all is o.k. but as I said I have been advised to wear the dreaded sleeve (although thankfully only for heavy duty work and I hope it remains like that) as like you I don't want that kind of daily reminder.
Nicky so good to hear you are back at work and enjoying the normality and that people have been paying you compliments for the new hair style just what you need
Angie so sorry to hear about your Nan.
Lorraine what a blow being told not to continue with the job still I am sure something else will turn up for you that in the end will be better and you must listen to advice as you say health comes first (and don't we all know that to be true!)
Julia I used aloe vera propolis cream the whole time during rads and really had very little redness or soreness the hospital staff were all impressed with the condition of my skin and I usually burn easily being faired skinned. I am still slapping it on now post rads just to make sure all will stay well. It is amazing how quickly the body forgets about the horrible times (thank goodness) just needs a bit of special treatment.
Well I had better get that case unpacked and clothes washed (the horrible part of a holiday) and then go shopping,no food in the house either and then off to see the Onc. Will let you know how I get on before returning to work tomorrow!
Love to you all Bev x
Bev, welcome back and wow you sound like it did you the power of good. I think you might need another, later in the year!!! LOL. Where did you go on holiday? I am trying to book a holiday but things/ill people keep stopping me. I'll get there eventually.
Lisa, do you mean your arm is 2cm wider than the other? I have never checked mine but I thought the right arm (if right handed) was always a bit bigger as you use the muscles more. You have me wondering now, how did you spot yours? I hope I have more frequent checks but don't know. I have the postponed check up with the surgeon in a fortnight and also waiting for an appointmnet to check my blood has returned to normal again, with the onc. That one is supposed to be within 6 weeks of finishing rads, so prob Feb too. Not sure what happens with the trial as my nurse has changed jobs and no-one else has contacted me yet. Headaches are tricky aren't they as they are a known side effect of so many drugs as well as being just a normal thing. Don't let the mind wander too much, anything dodgy, I believe, would also make you dizzy or have balance problems. If in doubt check it out though. I am trying to keep my imagination away from thinking about the lump under my scar!!! Easier said than done.
Well Victor is back to work tomorrow and now my son is ill. Typical!!! His temperature is 38.8 and I think it is tonsilitis but always keep an eye on him as he had severe pneumonia a few years back and ended up in hospital. He is boiling hot but wrestling me to get the covers back as he feels cold. Rotten trying to take tablets with a lumpy throat. So I think I will take him off to the doc for some antibiotics tomorrow and then knowing him, he will want to go back to school. Just for the social life and pool table you understand, not a studious type!! I wish! I have been having a good chuckle at Victor doing his exercises as he has to do alternate arms and legs, which make him look like he is doing the Saturday night fever dance. Can't help singing it every time and when he tries to get back on his feet!!!! Well I could be sick laughing as he has such long legs and is like a crashlanded daddy longlegs.LOL. So lots of sympathy from me!!! I should really try harder after all his caring for me but men are not good patients are they?
I am off to see the Headmaster tomorrow to see what job he has planned for me. It will be strange being back but I think it will just be in his office and prob won't see my lovely tutees.
Have a good week. I have a tv star coming to see me this week. Beat that!!
Lily x x
Bev glad you had a lovely time, sounds just like what you needed.
Lily, arm about 2cms, really dont want bloody sleeve but needs must. My check up is just a feel around which Ihave every 12 weeks, have mamogram next week and told I would continue every year without doubt so check that.
Getting used to hair - its only bout cm but doing okay, lashes seem to be loosing a little again but maybe it just me. Lots of headaches but hoping its just pills! Trying to have some normal time now - thanks for info on teeth will see how brave, more needles - my phobia of them has eased a little but get wound up cos of lack of viens, longer go without having one the worse it comes up again.
Hope everyone had a nice weekend!!!
Found you all!
Just a quick note as I have not been back long and need to unpack etc etc and so haven't had a chance to catch up with all the posts yet but just to let you know I thoroughly recommend a drop of sunshine. It has done me the world of good my eybrows are completely back, eylashes longer than before! and hair appearing albiet still pretty sparce but it is coming back! I had a lovely relaxing time and feel my energy levels are back to normal to the point that had one late night clubbing session! (yes I am not past it yet) and was up dancing to the a tribute band of the Drifters until 2 a.m. I was amazed. I see the Onc tomorrow and need to ask if my tamoxifen can be altered maybe to the Nolvaldex as the one I am on doesn't allow much sleep as I am either boiling or freezing so sleeping for longer than a couple of hours seems to be impossible. Back to work on Tuesday! so normal life resumes.
Sorry will read everyone's post and catch up properly.
love to you all Bev xx
Lisa sorry to hear you think you might have lymphoedema, is your arm very swollen? Keep us posted how you get on with that. Someone had posted lymph exercises to do if you can find them on a search. I have an idea Fizbix was either posting them or reading them, if you want to ask her. Good to be getting signed off by some of the hospital departments and you have your fair share of them! Do you know what they will do on your check up, I have no idea ? I think check ups are going to be scary times for us all but at least we will all be having them at similar times so won't feel so alone. Nurse sort of implied to me that I would be put on 3 year mammos, do you think that can be right? I will probably go privately if they do. Regarding your teeth, my son had a white plastic brace, which hardly showed. We had to pay as not covered by NHS but no choice as he is allergic to certain metals and we had been told it would definitely cause problems if he had a regular one. I think if it is important to you, then go and do it. Not that many things that are in our control these days. The wedding arghhh, will I cope/afford 3 more after my eldest??? She phoned a photographer and it was Â£2500 for him to take the shots and produce an album, everyone else paid extra for any they wanted!!! I must be totally out of touch as I thought it was a horrendous price. Angie, does Tommy do weddings??? If not get him into them quick and have a life of leisure.LOL.
Nicky congrats on getting through a full week of work and enjoying it too, wow a real result!! Lots of luck for a smooth treatment on Monday and then just think, peace again for weeks. When is your birthday? Mine is 2nd Feb. Angie, you and I must be close in dx dates and birthdays, weird!!! Anyone else got a birthday soon? We all seem to be having a think back to last year. Mine was dx on 29 Feb so I won't go through that date again for 4 years. It was 6 weeks after my boss was dx and I had been really trying to support her, and about a fortnight after my friend's secondary was dx - we all work at the same place! Some of our friend's there said they had their hand down their jumper checking every day after us lot. How many needles do you think we have had in the last year? I sometimes wonder if they can spot us from space with the amount of radiation we have all accumulated!!LOL. MY scar from having the port out has turned into a marble like hard lump, which is so on my mind right now. I know it is almost certainly shrinkage from the rads, what do you think? Victor managed to be up for quite a lot of the day so looking good for Monday. He said he will go in late and take it easy, so I can drop him right outside the station, rather than a longish walk from the commuter car park. He gets the 5am train usually so not looking forward to doing that drive, if I have to!! BTW stop taking the mickey out of my memory problems with texts, I am covered by the Disability act!! I will tell my cleaner to do extra work on the carpet for you!!! How long will you be able to stay? I can talk for weeks!!
Julia hope the sting hasn't settled in yet and how did you get on with the onc? Hope it went as you wished.
Angie how are you doing on the nolvadex? Hope it is not giving you flushes.
Well, just completed my 1st 'full' week of work and really enjoyed it. It felt good to be doing more normal things and this is the first 4 weeks in a looooong time where I haven't been to a hospital for anything since last March. Of course this was ruined yesterday by my blood test for my treatment on Monday but, fingers crossed, all will go smoothly and I'll be done for another 4 weeks. Plus point was no longer wearing wiggy and getting compliments that my new look suits me. I'm now in my 'anniversary' time since my dx last year. I found out my lump was BC the day before my YD's 17th birthday so we were all upset plus her bl**dy boyfriend had dumped her so all in all a pretty rough time for her and us. Plus my b'day was (is) a few days after hers so can't say mine was much good either. That's why we're intending to have a great time for her 18th and then for my 40th (ha, ha - only kidding, 47th really) just after. Just have to hope I don't get any scan appointments before or that I can put them off till just after.
Angie - hope your Nan is well on the road to recovery.
Lisa - sounds like you're getting on with things which is great. Sorry if it is lymphodema but hopefully if it's caught early there's more that can be done for you. Take a big breather from any ops and enjoy some time away from BC and all that it entails.
Lorraine - I know you are 'meant' to be on your last legs for DLA but you can apply under the special rules part. You need to get your GP or (I think) MacMillan nurse or onc to sign the form for you. It is a bit scary as basically it's saying you are not expected to live longer than 6 months however I argued the point with my GP that 'who can tell?' as he was reluctant to do it. Also the benefits advisor I saw says there are many thousands of people on DLA under special rules who have been for over 18 months. I really am not a sponger but, as was pointed out on another thread, we can't guarantee drawing our pensions when we've got secondaries so we should get any help we can now. You also get a disability badge (which I don't intend using for a long time) which may hep you with parking if your back is really painful and mobility is impaired for a while. Definitely worth looking into. Hope your look for a new job goes well but I know what you mean about liking being at home - it's so easy to do nothing all day even when there's loads you should be doing. Also hope your son's arm is getting better and he's not done any permanent damage.
Julia - nearly finished in the fryer then? Must be over half way by now (I think) Look after yourself, you can get very tired towards the end of it all. Hope appt with onc sorted your next options out for you and it went the way you wanted.
Lily - well D day minus 5 and counting! Let's hope we don't scream too much (as in your dream/vision!) when we meet up. I hope I'm not expected to wait on Victor as well? Would be a bit too much in one day to try out my bedside manner! Do you need texts for everything? If so I'll text you to remind you that I'm visiting - make sure the red carpet is hoovered please! It is so easy to forget these dys. I don't think I've been too affected by chemo brain but if I don't make a note about something it doesn't happen - having said that it was like that before chemo so maybe senility was on it's way already!
Take care all, plus anyone I've not included. Bev - hope you have the time to read all these posts when you get back, can't believe we're up in the 70's already!
Have a good weekend all, nice and sunny here today after a very wet night.
Hiya all , sorry Ive been absent, just sooo busy! Work, partying and sort of getting my life back, its scary as bit nervous bout enjoying self just in case. Gyni signed me off and oncologist but off for breast check up on monday and to see about my arm, think got lymphodema, just dont want a blasted sleeve. Mamogram next week as its coming up to the year mark as found it on my birthday last year, its defo a similar time for all of us I think. Well hoping to have 6 mths to do things then have recon. Would really love to get my teeth sorted but not sure what can be done, had braces for years when younger and teeth were fine, now the two front ones have parted and large gap and one turns slghtly, makes me paranoid but never had guts to do anything about it - no idea what but might try and find out.
Hope everyone okay.
Angie - hope your Nana okay and that you are eating enough!
Nicky - really pleased about your hair
Lily - any mrore wedding plans? Get that holiday booked!
Lorraine - so sorry about the job - hope you feel better soon.
Better go, having another weight watchers glass of wine! Healthy ish eating!!!
well my Victor is still flat on his back and at my mercy!!! LOL. I did enquire how he felt about being the patient for a change and he said huh, not impressed at all. He then let slip that he had thought lying in bed looked better than it was in reality. He has got up a few times today so I hope things are improving so I can have a rest next week! I am madly trying to write a section for the final year of my Masters and keep losing my thread due to interruptions, meal and drink breaks, chemo brain and lack of motivation. I might just be wasting my time trying to do it now but don't want to think I failed to finish it just because of Bc. It takes too many things away as it is. I feel like I am the worst one at getting back to work.
I have not dared to try my suits on yet as some were getting a little snug before all this. Might be a good reason to go for a really big shopping expedition next week if I can face buying bigger sizes. I almost booked a summer holiday this week. I was sitting in the travel agents, lost to everything else, as they searched for nice places within my budget (which was taking some time) , when my daughter rang and all the alarm bells went off in my head at the same time- oh s..., I am supposed to be picking tiny terror up in less than 30 minutes and I am miles away. So I had to leap up and run out of the shop and leg it back to the car park. So now I get a reminder phone call from her every day , not to to forget my Grandson. When did I get to this state, how did it happen, is it chemo or early senile decay!!!! My alternative onc, who I don't like seeing, tells me it is due to menopause! What a cheery thought.
It is strange because only today someone mentioned my birthday soon and that I would be 49. I said at any other time I would have been saying ooh no I'll be 50 next year, but you know I don't think I will ever moan about being older again. Even thinking about being 60 or more sounds like good news! Funny how things change so much,
Very old (and I don't care) Lily x
Hi: It's Friday – hooray!
Angie – sorry to hear about your Nan but from what you say she sounds OK. These old birds can be very tough – hope we are the same when we get to her age. Glad you have made the one year anniversary – I discovered my lump about one year ago and had it confirmed on 7 Feb and from there it is history. Can't really believe it is that long ago.
Nicky: Great news about your hair – can't wait to ditch the wig, it is getting itchy and boring now. Must go see hairdresser next week, he will probably give it a trim to encourage growth. Quite like my Sinead O'Connor look (as my office cleaner called it when I showed her the progress!!). Am writing myself some notes for my meeting with the onc today otherwise you tend to only talk about one thing and forget the rest.
Lily: Yes I have got dark patch on chest below what used to be a good looking boob but it is not itchy or sore – yet. Still lathering on the gunk – have just changed to Aloe Vera and using the aqueous as shower gel. Surgery scar seems to be diminishing which my onc said it would with the rads. Still wearing proper underwear - haven't resorted to the baggy look yet!!
Love the story of your work interview – I am afraid that unless you tick all the boxes on your list you are a forgotten commodity in Gordon Brown's gulag. I'm sure you will fit right back in at work and wonder why you were concerned.
Better go, and pretend to do some work.
Hi, (posting attempt number 3 Grrrrrrrrr)
firstly Angie so sorry to hear about your Nan but very pleased to hear she now seems ok and long may that last.You sound really busy, which is good but remember to EAT! Still lots of repairing going on inside our bodies. I still haven't looked your wedding site up yet but intend to, when my memory does what it is supposed to. So what are you up to workwise? Anarchy or saving the world!!!! I dreamt we all travelled from our various ends of the world and surprised you at your wedding. I am sure this was after watching Mamma Mia! When we realised who each other was we all screamed and then you came in and realised who we all were, grinnining like cheshire cats, and started screaming too. It didn't do a lot for the registrar !! Obviously I have weddings on the brain these days.
Nicky - for someone who is fighting to get on the computer, boy you have written a lot. I have enjoyed reading your long posts and why so much worry about your hair? Anyway glad you now find it to your taste and congratulations on rejoining the wig-free population. Can't wait to see the edgy hair, when you visit. I am fair bursting to meet you in person, rather than the virtual Nicky on my sky plus box. I wonder how many times I can play it in one day. I just hope you won't be sick when you see the close up of your hand with the cannula, assuming it is your hand of course. It still has rings on it! Have you got them back on again yet? Mine is still tight at times, probably got a permanent dent underneath it though. Thanks for the tips on Vit E as I have some from when I used it on my operation scars and still put some on occasionally. I will also try to get my bp taken some time to see if the Tamoxifen has affected me. By the way, even if hubby is still home, you are still very welcome.
Lisa - how is the H and Dennis these days? I loved that spell when we were trying out hair replacement ideas, it just kept me chuckling all the way through those weeks. Are the Se of the op slowing down at all?
Julia - gosh you are motoring on through the rads now and hopefully without any problems. I think the trick is to make sure the radiated skin of the underneath of the boob does not touch the skin of the chest. I am still using the cool gel dressings but it is not bothering me at all unless I try to wear a bra. Commando for a bit longer. It is just very brown with big peeling patches now so just got to wait for the skin to recover.I think the squirmy itchy part is worse than the heat of the burn myself as I couldn't scratch it.
Bev are you back and did you have a lovely time?
Lorraine, so sorry you had withdrawal stmptoms from my daily wittering. Two men are keeping me busy!!! Hubby is still in bed so constant dashing up and down stairs with meals, food, phone calls, etc and tiny terror has to be picked up by 1pm and has stayed every evening. Also my lovely forum friend Sharon2 has been hijacked by our local hospital so I went to visit her last night. She is being held captive with egg sandwiches and a yoghurt! How is your back now? I still feel very sorry about you giving your job up and have been trying to think of ideas for something else. What about a library? Or I could send my ironing every week???????????????????????Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hope your son's hand is healing well now too.
I went to the work interview with sleeves rolled up ready for action and was met by a very sweet, very large young lady who started by saying 'do you mind telling me what cancer you have as my Mother died of it' That put an end to anything else and as I was not poor, gay, a single Mother, in debt, unable to pay my mortgage, disabled or missing any major body parts AND HAD A JOB!!!, they were unable to help me any more in finding me a job. So I went home again. Next stop was to tell my boss I plan to descend this month and so I have to go for a meeting next week to discuss what I will be doing. He is keen for me to do very little in the 2 weeks before half-term. We'll see how it goes when I get there. It will be good/scary to go back in after 10 months of no contact at all. Might try to make a dash down the corridor to see my lovely tutor group who I have missed so much.
Must post before the gremlin eats it again
OK so I'm still being tested. Tomorrow's the 1 year anniversary and I feel fine but my Nan's now in hospital. She's been having heart trouble and was having the stress tests when she had a heart attack. She's OK, colour in her cheeks, sitting up, laughing and reading etc and lets be honest, there's no better time than when wired up to monitors but still... gulp. She's 80 this year.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed for her, just agreed with my Mum that we now all avoid hospitals this time of year!
where art though lily? are you enjoying life so much you havnt got time for the pc, hope you ok, thats all that matters.
thanks for the kind messages of support about job, ive accepted it really, cos part of me didnt mind being at home, but i just need some income, so i will try DLA again, though i think you need to be on your last legs to receive it.
been to hosp again today, with son hes now got a new splint on it. wouldnt have been able to take him if i was working, so that was easier.
take care everyone.,x
Went to my hairdresser yesterday only to be told he thought my hair was great and just needed a trim! I knew he'd say that but after a week of getting used to it, 2 daughters and OH saying it looked fine and then 3 hairdressers giving me the thumbs up I'm feeling better about it! I actually had it cut, as in textured, and nearly fainted after seeing it fall off - I've spent so long growing the damn stuff I don't want it gone! Anyway, then braved Guildford on the way back for some retail therapy as I need some different clothes to go with the 'edgier' me - any excuse. Then back to work today with no wig! We are an open plan office on one floor so everyone saw as I walked in, plus I start later than most people so they were all there before me! Anyway, had lots of compliments and had to explain to a few people that, No, I hadn't had a drastic haircut, I had ditched my wig. So I'm now officially de-wigged and enjoying the freedom, if not the cold ears! Now I just have to see friends and family and get them used to the new me.
Lorraine - so sorry about the job but I can see where he's coming from about the lifting. Maybe you can find another job? I know it's difficult but I'm sure there will be something out there. Your info from your onc sounds good in terms of grade etc and I hope there's no further spread. Having said that I have read on here that it can happen and they can switch hormone tablets etc to help. Also I would try for DLA, there's loads of info on here if you do a search but get a MacMillan nurse or someone in the know to help you with it. I applied in Nov and am waiting to hear but got the benefits advisor for MacMillan to fill it in for me as I'd met her on a secondaries event. Even though I feel fine I still have to take time off work for appointments and I don't get paid if I don't work. Plus I felt so bad with all the side effects I couldn't work anyway. You sound like you have a strong case for it and it certainly would help financially.
Julia - hope the rads skin stays calm but watch out for afterwards as Lily found out! Good luck for tomorrow.
Hi to everyone else and hope you are keeping away from any bugs. I'm so glad we didn't have chemo during the winter months as it must add an extra worry.
Angie - meant to have said I hope you can celebrate tomorrow and finally put those 12 months to bed. As you say there will be some other lady having the same type of news as this awful BC gets to so many of us. But - onwards and upwards my dear!
Bye for now take care everyone, have a good weekend if I'm not on here before.
Hi all: Am working today and trying to catch up with you all. Really good to read that we are all moving on to new things – and trying to revert to normal (whatever that is).
Angie – just had a look at the venue – looks lovely, the area is great – stayed in Buxton some years ago and thought it was really beautiful. Can't think why anyone should be offended by your homeopathic remedies – I've always found them fascinating – only problem is getting hold of them. Think your recommendations for bruising sound good – am definitely going to get hold of those – OH slipped off loft ladder beg of last week and fell from second step onto wooden floor. Since he has less fat on him that the proverbial chip (Oh pleeeease) is very sore and bruised. Did say he could have some of my fat if he wanted any!! Your year's project sounds very demanding but as I have found working thru it does give you something else to think about. Unfortunately having been a complete sloth the rest of the time (and put on stone!) have now got to get moving.
Lily – Love the Kato comment – I am going back a bit in catching up! Have you had your back to work meeting yet? And did it go OK? The wedding venue sounds lovely but we are all hoping you are sitting down when the quotation arrives.
Everyday: sorry to hear about the job. As I said above, I think it really helps to have something to move on to. Are you going to search around for something else? In Gordon Brown's recession it may not be easy but best of luck.
Nicky: thanks for the good wishes for Friday – I think one of the difficulties with various drugs is that oncs get stuck into a routine and it is difficult to move to something else, but we will see. Having talked to my sister about the family history, it is worse than I thought. Our mum had two heart attacks – first at 60 – where she technically died and had to be paddled back to life (I hadn't forgotten obviously but have only been asked about cancer history not heart).
Hair is still taking ages to grow – sides and back are OK but top is still thin, am dosing it with Vit E oil and taking the brewer's yeast to give it a boost.
Have no 8 of 15 rads today so have hit the halfway point. No probs yet, been a bit itchy but that is all. Am using the aqueous stuff but think I will change to Aloe Vera as the cream gets into your clothes but the gel seems to sink in more. Will also use the Vit E once it is all over as the oil I have is very gloopy and is fine for rubbing into my head but wouldn't want to do the same to my poor old boob.
Anyway, better to some work – will let you know how the onc meeting goes. Have a good weekend everyone, not sure about the weather, pretty yukky I think but not so cold.
Lots of love
Oh Lorraine... that's horribly restrictive... hugs. Really hope that it's normal muscular damage. I can't believe how easily things go twang at the moment. I don't think they realise how weak it leaves us feeling to be honest.
i just lost the longest message ever.aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh went to see onc today, he is giving me a bone scan to check back, he thinks it may be due to the mets i have down spine, ( i really hope not). i asked loads of questions.
what grade is my cancer 2
am i having the best treatment for your age yes, when you reach 52(or if i do) we will change it then
can i dye hair yes, nurse said why? its lovely, he says its fashion
can i do my job (in nursery) not ideal, dont lift over 10kg
why skin flaking inbetween fingers from chemo
can i shave under arm not on affected side
can i live a normal life yes but no no no lifting
i said this is great fun aint it!
so ive had to give up my job, but am more relaxed now not letting p;eople down. i was enjoying it, but my health means more to me. i will have to try for dis allowance again, i was refused before.
hope you well
thanks for advice if it works for dog, i will give it a try.
take care everyone.x
Give it a few weeks for any SE to kick in from Nolvaldex. However I didn't really suffer on Tamoxifen all those years ago, well 5 years ago. Certainly didn't notice much once I'd finished my 2 years of Zoladex. maybe because it was a breeze compared to all the SE's from Zoladex! Just a word of warning to everyone it is worth getting your Blood Pressure checked every so often, my went up dramatically and it was the Tamoxiifen causing it as it went back to normal once I stopped taking it last year whilst on chemo.
Take care all, gotta dash, about to eat.
ps Hope all went well today Lorraine - let us know how you got on
Just a quick drop my as my inbox is just filling up right now and I've got so many invoices to do.
Nicky great to hear from you, will PM you my email address in a mo so should be the next message you see on this thread after this one.
Lorraine. Hope the bath was nice and onc appointment is productive, assuming the back pain is normal muscular pain you'd want a combination of 3 homeopathic remedies ideally. 30c each of Rhus Tox, Ruta and Arnica. Arnica deals with any surface bruising and the other 2 deal with deeper tissue and muscle damage. That specific combination is amazing and is the one we always have in our walking first aid kit. I kid you not when I say it saved our poor dog from surgery, he'd done real damage to his leg when he jumped of a style and was limping really badly, vet couldn't see the damage and said he'd have to do exploratory surgery just to see what was wrong, we refused, took him home, called my mum and gave his all 3 remedies 3 times a day for 2 days and suddenly he was bounding again. Since then we use it every time someone sprains an ankle, does their back in or lands badly (we're not delicate people).
This is why I'm suspicious when people say this stuff is all in the mind as the dog hasn't a clue what he's taking and why.
I'm a big fan of hot bubbly baths for back aches but doesn't really work on really bad ones does it 😞
I've just taken my first Novaldex this morning, so far everythings OK. I suspect that I'll manifest some symptoms just worrying about them though LOL. How long before the side effects kick in Ladies?
Can't believe that Friday is the 1 year anniversary of my diagnosis. Struck me this morning that today's Wednesday which is clinic day at Carlisle and there's probably some poor woman who's going to get the news that we all hate so much and go through the year we all did, and while I feel pretty good right now I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
I just hope that things stay in stasis or even recede for those of you with secondaries.
Lots of love Ladies, must eat now, feeling nauseous again, but then I have only had a satsuma so far today.
hi nicky glad to see your back on form, enjoy the drink or two, with mates will do you good. im just going to have a nice bath, and get ready for appointment with onc, later. i need to shave down below, why does that area grow so quick compared to the head. im now going around all the time without the wig, just waiting to have it coloured like you, but mine seems ok if i stick the old gel on, in fact it seems wavy then, chemo hair as people say. my sister was supposed to have her chemo today, but her platlets are low, so been put off, shes relieved in one way, but wants to get her op done so is dissapointed as well.
i can imagine you found it frustrating at work having to keep having time off, but was it easier with them knowing about everything before. it just seems terrible with just starting, bet their wishing theyd not employed me. nothing i can do except ask onc today, and try to move about as much as i can. my hubby of course is as sympathetic as ever, but never mind at least i have everyone here to chat with, it does help to let of steam. especially with these hot flushes! take care enjoy the day.
god bless you all.x
Right, I'll continue....
Lisa - I read what you said about it being difficult when you get back home (but it's on the other page so sorry if I get it wrong). It must be so tough on you dealing with this and all the other things that have gone on in your life like losing your OH and the death of other family members. No wonder it hits you when you've got time to thinks about it or are on your own. I hope you can keep yourself and your mind busy (in a positive way!) which can help. This time of the year can be so difficult and fairly gloomy most of the time with the weather not helping either. Hope things pick up soon but I know you've also got alot to decide with possible ops etc. Keep using us as a moaning board! Also meant to say if you are looking at cosmetics and stuff one of the things to avoid seems to be parabens which are a preservative used in loads of toiletries etc. There seems to be a link with BC, although not fully proven as with most links, but they are worth avoiding. A lot of more expensive stuff doesn't have them but look out for natural or paraben free ones in Boots and supermarkets. Tesco do a good affordable range called Be Natural, also health shops will have them but ttend to be more expensive. There have been threads about this before - worth a search.
Julia - hope appt goes well this Friday and you find out what's next! I'd love to know if any heart problems like you have or I've experienced have been linked to after effects of chemo. Maybe your Prof will know? Hope yours settle down and you can find out about Herceptin.
Lily - hope burns are healing nicely. Once the worst is over try putting Vit E oil on the area, it may mean it clears up even quicker and leaves no marks - who knows when you will be baring all? Wedding venue sounds fab - just hope you and OH are sitting down when the bill comes in! Hope the 'back to work' interview went well and you get a job LOL! And that you behaved yourself and didn't tell them where they can stick their forms! Sorry to hear Onc appt was cancelled we seem to get all ready for them one way or another and then have to build ourselves up again if they get changed. I'm coming up to the same time of the year as last when I had my (routine) mammo that showed my recurrence up. I just had a feeing all along that it wouldn't turn out to be a blip on the screen, however hadn't quite expected the outcome that eventually happened. Oh well, in some ways I hope to be better off than this time last year as my BC responded to chemo so, like Dr Who, I hope to have gone back in time!
Off to sort the H out today - I really hope something can be done to lighten it as I hate, hate, hate wearing my wig still. If not I may get it shaved off and start again! At least wiggy wouldn't be so uncomfortable then. I was interested to see wigs are making a come back as a style statement. Brilliant for all of those who don't have to wear them all the time and have any of the fashion writers ever worn one for more than a photo shoot - I think not!
Take care all and sorry if I've missed you out. Bev are you back yet?
What with work and 2 daughter doing college work the computer seems out of bounds! A quick catch up before anyone else wants to use it!
Lorraine - really sorry your back is still playing up but it can take ages to sort itself out. OH had a problem last year and ended up going to an osteopath to get it sorted and even then it took a bit longer. He was given strong painkillers by GP but these didn't sort it completely so with any luck yours is also a pull or strain and will get sorted. Hope all goes well today with onc and he sends you on your way 🙂 I do know how frustrating all this can be. I had expected to be working pretty much my normal 3 days a week after chemo ended. Oh no, that didn't happen! I seemed to spend more time than ever off work and at one medical place or another. I've only just got back into my stride now and just waiting for the next little thing to stop me! Take care though and be good to yourself. Hope your son is also recovering - a big shock for you all, I remember my younger brother doing the same thing but not so badly cut.
Angie - a year's project - well that gives us food for thought! So glad you and the other geeks had a good weekend - not my idea of fun I must admit but someone has to do it! Really pleased it means you also are back into the real world and picking up where you left off. I know you won't be on here as much but would love your email so I can pester you occasionally if I've not heard anything! Also I can visit you if we're in your lovely neck of the woods. Don't think this is an idle threat either as I'm good to my word - ask Lily - I'm descending on her next week, ha ha! Good luck with the work the move and the wedding - boy you know how to start a year off!
Lisa - hope you are doing well. Good for you to get out to the pub - that's what they are there for! I'm all for meeting with friends for a drink (or 2,3,4) and a catch up!
Oops - YD is up and needing the printer will sign off and continue in a min
hope you all enjoying the day, or the moment at least.
thanks for your advice, i do sleep with the pillow between my legs sometimes, hope hubby sorts his back out. go to onc tommorow, so see what he says regards work. my youngest as gone to school today, he hates being off, but i think its more about seeing his friends than the school work, (we werent like that, were we?) i think i was actually, i hated school.
sorry your appointment with onc , was cancelled im looking forward to seeing him, it feels like their the only ones with the answers we have to ask. ( although the advice on here is great). what would we do without each other, suffer in silence. probably.
ive done more housework today, so maybe back is getting better, but its still hurts at times. still worrying about losing time off work, why cant nothing be simple.
i would love some advice, what can i use. i need a miracle cure!
hope everyone else is ok
take care x
I think (will know more when i actually go to work again) that being back at work is probably the time we forget thisc..p and feel like we used to. Somewhere between work and home, the old dark thoughts surface and you wonder if you are just fooling yourself. A bit of a battle we all have to have until Bc gets kick boxed into a corner of the brain. Mine keeps coming out and launching attacks like Kato on Inspector Clousseau (spelt that wrong!). Anyway wishing you more peaceful times as we dodge scary appointmnets and things.
Angie, I feel the need to sleep just thinking about that work. Can I also say that I felt you have always been enthusiastic and keen to help others with homeopathic remedies and I am saddened that this has been taken in any other way.
Lorraine, glad to hear the cheeky rascal is well enough to want fuss from girls and negotiate new clothes too!! Hope your back is improving. I have made Oh an appointment with a physio on Wed. She insisted on talking to him personally and he has been told to keep moving and not to just lie in bed. When in bed he has to keep moving legs and have pillows under his knees when lying on his back. When lying on his side he has to have pillows between his knees (like when preggers!). Not sure if any of that will help you. Don't forget we are covered by the Disability act so our employers have to meet our needs, so don't worry too much about them. I know you always feel worse if you are new but think how you would feel towards one of the others if they had flu or broke a limb, that is how they are/should be thinking of you. I don't have much trouble with the older kids as I don't wind them up but at 11 or 12, some only respond to being told off loudly, which I don't do very often at all. I get really mad if one bullies another or hurts someone though. Always in the wrong place trying to stop trouble and fights, so have taken a few wallops myself in previous schools! My current school is very middle class so a different atmosphere. Lots and lots of luck on Wednesday with the onc.
My consultant was ill so my appointment was cancelled today. they just left a message on 1571 and hoped I would find it! It is now resceduled for my birthday. Fab! My burn is improving fast although my Gp was wincing looking at it, when I went for more supplies of the dressings. I have now negotiated a back to work day. He kept offering me weeks extra, which was really nice to think I had that support if I needed it. I have my Gov get me back to work interview tomorrow. What a load of rubbish and I am hoping not to get a sweet person, so I can be really bolshy.
Hi everyone else, are you ok?
yes it was quite a shock when i got the call from hospital, but i think im getting used to being shocked. my eldest two were bad boys and lots of calls from police and hospital, so this one is an angel so far, and i really hope it stays that way. he didnt want to stay off school cos hes missing the attention off the girls. they have made such a fuss of him. he manage to wrangle a new tracksuit out of me, cos he needed a front opening top and he never had one. oh well, whats money! hope your soreness is easing. are you allowed to put something cool over the soreness. my back is still bad but not as painful as before, mainly its in bed, ive told them at work, they may not be pleased, and im worried but i really cant do anything about it. i will check things out with onc on wed, along with a long list of questions.i hope everything goes ok for you when you go back to work, its hard to judge how much your up to, mentally i feel positive and want to carry on as normal, but the body is not so willing. at least with teenagers (i think thats who you work with) you dont have to get up and down, but then you have to put up with their silliness at times, i dont know how you do that? but then again i think theyre mostly ok if you treat them like
humans and not aliens.
thanks for the kind thoughts hope you doing well.
everyone else take care . live it up a bit, and have fun!
Lisa, I know what you mean about feeling fine at work. nearly didn't want to come home. Finally got some sleep on Sat night and another full day on Sun, managed to eat so asking pertinent questions and grilling people was all fine and so was the attention spam. A 40 min dose in the evening and I was ready for a night of silly card games and wine with friends. Cancer was a distant memory for a while and it was lovely.
I've now been put in charge of a project I won't be able to talk about for a long time (roughly a year) so feel like my life is back and I'm back but certainly have to keep an eye and make sure I don't overdo it so I doubt I'll have time to be on here so much now that I have responsibilities again... you can always reach me through facebook or email though.
Am going to collapse into a little heap now and hope you all have a really good week, and I hope everyones aches and pains subside and your son heals well Lorraine.
Loads of love to you all
Angie (in recovery... 27 geeks, 24 hours of meetings in 72 hours of real time... done... and wow what an amazing weekend)
God we all worr at the drop of a hat dont we, suppose its normal, drive my parents bonkers, feel fine at wor, come home then it hits in.
Lily, venue sounds lovely! Glad red patches gone down - i still have spots on my back that appeared a few days afterwards.
Lorraine - hope your son aint suffering tooo much and your back gets better soon
Angie - venue sounds lovely. I cant cope with getting hot, wanna rip clothes off which wouldnt be a good site
Nicky - try not to worryabout headaches, mine have eased of now but a few weeks after starting arimidex I had awful headaches and was taking paracetomal against my better judgemen, however I must admit over the last week or so they have eased off
Had far tooo much booze in pub with my best mate who I havent seen over xmas as she ha flu so had lovely catch up and still ate healthy - weigh in day tomorrow so fingers crossd loss something
Lorraine, what a terrible terrible shock it must have given you to get called. I am so sorry to hear about it and guess it would have been very scary for him with all the blood too. Poor old chap. I have spent more time in hospital with my son after accidents than I care to remember, boys do just rush into things and have no fear. Have they said that the operation was successful? I think I might use looking after him as my reason for having a few more days off as he will need care. It looks better on your work record, you get a bit more rest and he gets some tlc. I am sure you would be worried if he was on his own trying to get lunch, etc.
As if you needed anything else!
Biggest hugs and back rubs with deep heat
hi hope everyone is ok
my younger son(13) as had us up the hospital all day, he went for sleepover at mates and they were running about and he put his hand through a glass door by accident, so he had to have an op. he had severed 2 tendons, we got the call at 5 this morning and only got back at 6 this evening, so not an exciting sunday. and i hated the memories of the theatre that came back when i waited with him to be aneathatised. i hope i never have to have that again, but im worried about my back because its so bad, i think it probable is muscular in my lower back, but it as set it off at the top were i know i have some spots on the bones.
anyway i dont know whats going to happen about work on tuesday, because time is ticking away, and the back is still hurting especially in bed. lily i sympathise with hubby, its no laugh! im going to bed early see if i can get a good night, so all take care x
hmmmmm mouth tightly closed and avoiding coughing like the plague after hearing that Julia. It just sits in my throat and is so annoying. The cold weather sets it off too, every time I go out the door or even open it. I had to pick my son up late last night and could hardly drive for coughing, the night air really gets me. Keep us posted how you get on in your Friday appointment. It might be worth looking up all the drugs he could give you to see if there is one that suits you best. How are the rads going? I started to feel it very slightly during the later part of the second week but by the morning any pinknesss had gone again.
Angie sorry to hear you were yuk. Hot cars make me get terribly travel sick, that breathing in warm stuffy air - yuk. Are you feeling better now? I will have a peek at that place later but sounds lovely. I have to say the wedding has really helped me to think and talk about other things now. Just a word of caution, if you were having a civil ceremony at the venue, check when the registrar is free too. You have to pay for them to come to the venue and on certain days there may only be one available. You can hold the date 2 years ahead provisionally, so a lot of dates get tied up early, especially May onwards. We found the popular places are already half full for Summer 2010. If you can marry mid week and take a cancellation, you can get an amazing drop in prices. Lots of luck in finding a place that is just right for you two.
Better go, tiny terror stayed last night and apparently we need to discuss pepper pig!!
Hi: Haven't sorted the pills yet, should be seeing Prof on Friday to decide on what. Am concerned about Herceptin as I have bad family history on Ma's side for heart trouble - Mum's sister died of heart attack at about 50 - long before I was born, of her six kids three have heart trouble, one died waiting for transplant, one daughter has cholestrol levels of Guiness Book of Records levels and is on continual treatment for that. So am not too happy about doing anything that could affect the ticker. added to which my tachycardia palpitations are worse now than six months ago - probably SE from chemo - and I get breathless with them sometimes so will have to run thru all this with the onc. I think around here they just do six months Herceptin not 12, but all will be revealed on Friday.
hope all the bad backs are getting better - girlfriend has horrific cough and has cracked and rib and torn two muscles with coughing. She was on liquid morphine but was so spaced out has had to give it up.
Take care all, and have a good week.
Lily I think Tommy and I are considering having outr wedding here actually.
Eco houses on a farm in the peaks it's lovely. I had a bath heated from geo thermal last night. It's amazing tech.
Oh god, don't mention food. This work retreat is good but it seems there;s a price for having any fun. in my case it's spending the evening in the loo talking to white elephants and needing to sleep every 6 hours. The problem is the heat from 27 people all being in the same room without aircon. I used to hate aircon but now I feel so sick if I get hot. I've eaten nothing but dry toast for 3 days now.... Am just consuming a bowl of museli with home now.
Everyone's been so sweet, it's the 1st time I've seen most of them since my diagnosis so I really wanted to just be well and this to be behind me but life's not like that is it 😞
Thank god for Lucozade and Dorset cereals.
Lorrainne. So hope your back is better soon. I know what homeopathics to use there so ask if you want to know. I don't want to force any info on anyone so won't do that unless people ask now.
I think we're all a lot weaker than we think. In comparison to when I was diagnosed a year ago I am so much weaker.
well the space age dressings were fantastic and just sorted it all out. I still have peeling patches but it is not bothering me at all. I am sure that keeping the skin of your boob and your chest apart is the way to go to avoid this.Mine like everything else slouch south and lean on the next biggest bulge!! LOL. Sorry, prob put you off yout dinner now.
Went to 2 more wedding venues today and we all fell in love with the same one -luckily! We have the whole place for the day so get a dining room all laid up with cream linen and bows, a disco room and bar, lounge with sofas for quiet moments, outside courtyard garden with seats and another bar, a really gorgeous ceremony room in a separate little building and a huge farmhouse with 8 bedrooms. The immediate family (if bride and groom agree of course) can all stay at the farm house and all have a big cooked breakfast together the next morning. Bride and groom get their own sectioned off part of the house. That was the easy bit, now we have to work out a budget!!! Needless to say I am planning my return to work and full wages pretty smart. The whole setting is a barn so very cosy and exposed wooden beams everywhere, set in the middle of the countryside. I was very close to blubbing looking at the happy brides in the photos they showed us and had to do that 'think about something else quickly' move and bit my tongue to add pain to help. The second venue was fab too but we had been to wowed by the first to be compromised. I await the verdict when they have done their figures but don't think it will be a comfy bill. Hubby was totally incapacitated in bed with his back. Lorraine he sounds just like you. I even had to get him a bottle he could drink from without sitting up. I also bought a heat pad that you plug in to warm the whole back area but not much good till he gets up. He is overdosing on Syndol tablets as they are painkillers and have muscle relaxants in them too. Hope yours improves very soon. I will tell my Victor that you have been like that for 5 days and try to frighten him to see a doc or someone. He hates anything medical so never goes. Sorry you have been upset too, it is so frustrating I know to get through treatment and then get something else. Just this cough is driving me to distraction as it starts every evening and morning. Sound like I smoke 40 a day sometimes!
Nicky I understand your worries completely and think we will always get more anxious than others about pains. Headaches are so common and being side effects too, you have to try to put them in the normal box. Easier said than done I know and I have worried about every little thing, including the cough so I am no good at dishing out advice!! Thanks, the burn is fine now and I don't even remember I have it mostly. The dressing worked so quickly, it is amazing stuff. Are you back on all foods again now? I am getting fatter by the day due to enjoying the taste of food so much again. Hope the vampires were quick and good luck on Monday. I get my 9 month surgical check up that day too. Looks like I might be going on my own if he is still in bed! I have tiny terror too, so will need a good plan to keep them all in the right place at the right time. Better go and do next round of 'in bed drinks and food'
hope your living it up! having a wonderful weekend? my back pain is still hurting ouch. and i mean really painful, i cant even move to turn around in bed, and have to grip on to the sheets when i get up. and its even uncomfortable when i dont move, i go to see onc next wednesday cant wait, boy have i got some questions for him.
your poor husband , i sympathise , and i can feel the pain when you cough in bed. im praying i can get back to work next week, but its worrying me, because its still pretty bad at times. i just want to get back to normal, my eldest son was so unsympathetic this morning that i ended up crying, not like me, but when youve been in pain for 5 days its enough to make anyone. i hope your body settles after the rads.
well i never, you just cant wait, dirty weekends on the horizon already? is that maybe why the headaches come on.?
take care everyone else.x