18 months post diagnosis (HER2+, ER/PR+, 4.2cm) I think I have reached the end of treatment (chemo, surgery-lumpectomy plus node clearance), radiotherapy and then 14 cycles of Kadcyla). I have a telephone “final” review with oncologist next week but don’t know what I should be asking & thinking this is last chance for questions. What should I be asking?
Scared because now need to get back to “normal” life & people say that’s great it’s all over but not in that place in my head. Am going to have to return to work… not sure how to manage this. Employer has been great but out of time now.
Congrats on getting through everything! One question to ask is about any follow up, and ongoing monitoring - will you be having scans, how often, what kind? Also, who is your contact point if you have any questions or concerns going forward.
As for getting back to normal life, please please be gentle on yourself. It might not be what you want to hear, but it will take time - possibly a fair amount - both physically and especially mentally. Maggies runs a course called ‘Where Now?’ which is exactly about this moment: everyone thinking you’re ‘cured’ and must be ecstatic, but actually you’re still going to be exhausted and adrift, and struggling with this perception of ‘normal’. Take it slow, you will get there, but quicker/easier if you don’t push too hard.
I think you’re entitled to a phased return to work, at the very least to ask. I ended up doing several last year, after surgeries, and I *always* tried to do too much too soon. I ended up talking to a therapist, and she hit the nail on the head: as soon as I felt capable of doing anything, rather than just sleeping all the time, I felt guilty if it was something fun and not work. But, there is a period where you can manage a bit of fun but not hours and hours of concentration.
Remember that the Disability Discrimination Act covers those who have had cancer, too, so you have a lot of protected rights.
Also, this forum will still be here for you. Loads of folk have experience of trying to get back into life, and will be ready with advice, support, and just hugs xx