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Don’t know how to feel at start of all this !!

6 REPLIES 6
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Re: Don’t know how to feel at start of all this !!

Thank you .. i think this waiting lark is something I need to get a handle on as I believe there is a lot of it about ! X
Member

Re: Don’t know how to feel at start of all this !!

Jo

I remember that feeling, that things are worse than they've told you. Once you've been told the shocking news that you've got cancer, your mind completely gallops away with you, and you start thinking of all the darkest scenarios. It's easy to focus on every ache and niggle and think the worst. The difficult thing is waiting for the tests and the results, once you have the full picture you can start to take it in and plan for the next stage.

I really hope it is just ordinary tiredness, and completely normal when you're dealing with the shock of being diagnosed. But hopefully the scans will come back clear and you can breathe again.

 

Xxx

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Member

Re: Don’t know how to feel at start of all this !!

Wow after a very sleepless night these were lovely words .. Thank you ... i guess I have to learn not to be perky all the time .. I think I have assumed the secondary diagnosis just because of the way the previous appt went but I should be patient and wait . I will definitely be asking more questions of you all . Thanks so much for being there x👍
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Member

Re: Don’t know how to feel at start of all this !!

Hi Jo

I think everyone goes through a whole storm of emotions when they get diagnosed, it's like someone has taken a bulldozer through your life. At the beginning it's all a bit of a whirl, but eventually things settle down, you find out the plan and start making sense of things.

Other people often have this expectation that you should make light of it, they'll tell you to stay positive.Its almost like we have to make them feel better. But sometimes you need to be able to talk about how it really is, we all have dark days when the fear seems overwhelming. So I hope you find lots of support on these boards from all the other women who know what it's like to be in your shoes because they're going through it too.

 

Sending you a hug

Xxx

 

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Community Champion

Re: Don’t know how to feel at start of all this !!

Hi Joan,
Sorry you find yourself here, but glad you found us, getting diagnosed is always such a shock.
If it’s spread to the nodes, hopefully the ct scan will show it hasn’t spread elsewhere, it is unusual to get a secondary diagnosis when first diagnosed.
When you do start treatment, do look at ‘going through treatment’ board & the ‘monthly chemotherapy threads’ where you will be able to chat & get support from others where you are now. Also do look at the ‘diagnosed with breast cancer’ thread, which is the place where you will be able to chat or vent to other ladies in your position.
It is exhausting & as Helena says, it’s quite normal to feel as you do now.
Sending hugs
ann x
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Community Champion

Re: Don’t know how to feel at start of all this !!

joanbasilthedog

 

Hello and welcome to this lovely forum where you will get loads of help and support from the wonderful ladies on here.

 

Yes what you are feeling is totally natural, it is amazing how our anxious mind takes over when we are diagnosed and every ache or pain makes us believe that the cancer has spread.  Once you have your treatment plan it will be a lot easier as you will know what is happening and when, at the moment you are trying to take so much in, deal with it and also letting others know, that is a lot of stuff to deal with in one go.

 

Just keep coming on here and we will always be there for you, whether it is to rant, rave, cry or ask questions we know exactly what you are going through

 

Sending you hugs

 

Helena xxx

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Don’t know how to feel at start of all this !!

Hi I am usually not great at these kind of things ( forums) .. just need advice . I am 44 , married with two teenagers , one just about to sit gcses . Found a lump , biopsy showed ‘agressive grade 3 ‘ cancer and re test on a second smaller area . ‘Evidence that is has travelled to the nodes’ means they are doing ct scan next week. The following week i get the results on what type of cancer , etc plan . Ct results . They have alrecommed chemo before op then radiation. Like most people all a whirlwind, i have sicky feeling all time and chronic back ache . Clearly i have already diagnosed secondary so no point on scan ! But this week to everyone else i have delivered the news with humour and positivity and banter with my colleagues in the school where i work . Telling teens was awful but havnt mentioned any idea of secondary and kept it light joking about trying to find a wig to match my dodgy hair ! I guess my point is i feel exhausted and as the consultant was at pains to point out i shouldnt be feeling any side effects from the tumour.. is this normal to feel like this at the start ?? 👵