Hello love I don’t suffer with mental heath my self but I hope your feeling better??🥰🥰..... and have you started your chemo yet?.. I have 2 tumours on the right Brest both triple negatives and grade 3..... this is the first time I have been through anythin like that and it’s very scary I just me hope your ok 🥰 xx
Jaybro - that's such a lovely response, thank you. So far, my breast care nurse has been fantastic and so supportive. I do feel able to talk to her. I guess yesterday I was so low I was thinking that maybe if I was a little less than stringent about shielding, then perhaps the decision would be taken out of my hands and perhaps this could all be over. And I hate that I was thinking that, it feels so ungrateful, I hate that it gave me a wee sense of relief, and it just feels deeply conflicting! I have shared those thoughts with a mental health professional, and I think I do feel a bit better (although at 4am, it's hard to be sure!!!!). I just feel so guilty for feeling, as you say, nihilistic and fatalistic.
I hope, once I start treatment it will become about dealing with the situation that is, and not swelling on the myriads that might be!
Take care, x
Sometimes it’s very hard to separate mental and physical wellbeing so a lot of people bundle all their concerns together. As you get more accustomed to the threads, you will probably notice this. My lifelong mental health problems were initially a huge obstacle for me but, once my oncology team had successfully addressed them so they didn’t get in the way of a full treatment programme (they do listen), I actually found the lifelong bit stood me in good stead and I experienced a lot less fear than most people seem to do. I became fatalistic and just went with the flow. Maybe I was just so used to panic attacks, nothing could be as bad as that!
I believe that mental wellbeing is a huge part of the cancer experience and it’s essential to address fears (without making them worse via Google) openly at all levels (GP, breast care nurse, oncology team etc) and to do everything possible to reduce the burden on the body when it needs all its resources to deal with the treatments. Feeling beyond low is actually a natural and normal response to a threat like a cancer diagnosis.
The pandemic introduces an additional uncertainty, but your team will propose a treatment programme that minimises the risks to you. The F*@! It approach may well work very well: some things are beyond our control. I wish you all the best with your treatments and hope you’ll feel able to express your concerns and get the support you may need. You may be surprised and find that, like me, something in your mind clicks and decides to put all your resources into recovery while the ongoing problems retreat to background noise. 18 months on, they are still hovering, undecided if it’s worth coming back after all this crap 🙂
Be kind to yourself x
You could join both threads - if you join the April one you can get some tips /ideas from those a little bit further on to help you prepare?
Thanks Jill. Yes, the surgery went well. I've got my 1st appt with oncology this Thursday, so should get a start date then. I'm guessing it'll be the 29th April or first week in May. Not sure whether to join in with the May one regardless, because the 29th is kinda/almost May anyway!
I was looking for a mental health thread, so thank you v much for pointing me in that direction!
And thank you for your reply too. Take care x
Hi welcome to the forum .Its hard enough dealing with cancer nevermind other health problems / life problems plus Covid 19.You are not the only one that's felt like they have very little fight left .Luckily for me at least that feeling has eventually passed and talking to other people here definitely helped with that .There is a section "coping with fear and anxiety" where I've posted a few times when things have got really tough - maybe you could post there ? I hope you feel better soon it sounds like the outcome of your surgery was positive ? You will get lots of support going through chemo if you join one of the monthly threads -do you have a date to start ? Jill x
I'm new here and really wasn't sure where to post this, so apologies if it does not entirely 'sit right' here.
I was diagnosed about 6 weeks ago, with grade 3 ductal breast cancer, er+ and her2+. I've had a lumpectomy 2.5 weeks ago which apparently got everything, and 0/2 lymph nodes tested positive. Due to start chemotherapy soon, my first oncology appt is Thursday so I'll know more then, I guess.
I'm surprised and curious, while also feeling v cautious, that there doesn't appear to be a thread for mental health issues concurrent with cancer, and exacerbated by flipping Covid-19!! I suspect there might be some very good reasons for that around boundaries/overload etc so I just thought I'd pose the question and see what comes of it. I'm feeling really very low indeed, almost nihilistic with the low immunity and coronavirus, I'm almost like "well, F... it!" I have been fighting for so long (something else, not cancer) that I just feel done really.