Breast Cancer Now Forum

Hi, Blue. Really glad you've joined us. And Kim, thanks so much for posting. It's great to have a reminder that this does pass.   Yeeeaaaay Egg, glad it happened. Hope you're feeling ok.   Robin, literally lolled at that thought. I can't get my cats to pose as they essentially think Bex is a squirrel! So we have to lock her away for her own safety.  Hello, Jackie. I've been lucky and not felt sick at all,but Emend sounds like it's been a lifesaver for you. Ha, obviously not literally, or your insurers would pay for it!   Ebim, I found myself tugging at a random hair on my big toe. It showed no sign of falling out for ages. By the way,I thought you said you'd bought Sambuca for your next round. I was very impressed, wondered if the aniseed was for the nausea?    Scotty, are you doing three FEC then T? I'm HER+ as well, but doing four EC before I move onto the T and targeted therapies. So you'll be able to give me advice. My original oncologist explained EC in detail and said she'd go through the T etc when it was closer. I'm not seeing the onc team before my third EC (exact wording was "we don't need to see you because it's clearly a walk in the park for you!") But I have an MRI before my fourth and then an appointment so I'm going to check then. My understanding is that the first round of T, plus Herceptin and Perjeta, does take a long time. You get a double dose of at least one of them and they wait to check that you're ok. So I'm assuming my March 29th appointment will take most of the day. TBH the chemo suite is so disorganised that I can never expect to get out quickly anyway. After the first one, I don't think it's too long. Then of course we have Herceptin for a year, and again that shouldn't be long. But the waiting around may be.    Mooney, caravan sounds fab. I've never even slept in one, but have fantasies about them. (I know, but they seem really exotic). Scotty, I meant to post this at the weekend. I grew up in the South West, only moved away at 50. And we lived on the Gower peninsula for a while. But I have to say that I think the beaches in the North East are the most beautiful of any in the UK. That picture looked perfect.    Stefr how are things? Any results back? Still thinking about you, let us know if there's anything you need.   Have a good day all   Ali xxx ... View more

Phew, Emily. I fell asleep on the sofa before you reappeared, so I'm glad it was nothing worse than cooking etc that delayed you.    Strudel, I really hope today goes well.    We've got pretty well the whole gamut going on here, from op plus rads, through plus chemo, to the backwards ones like me and Scotty with chemo first. It's weird how quickly it seems normal to go through it. I'm pretty sure that this forum helps far beyond the superficial support outsiders might see.   Anyway, enough of musing, I am going to grab a long bath before anyone else is up.   See you all later,   Ali xxx     ... View more

Such a good analogy Jo. A bit like pregnancy it's also a time when you can do nothing (lie on sofa/ watch telly/read etc) & still be doing something useful. Ok, it's not a baby but it's beating cancer. I can't say I'd choose the circumstances, but I'm not having a horrible time.   Sorry it was a shock, Sarah. I almost think it's easier when you know from the get-go that it's going to be needed.   Ali x ... View more

Hi, Lexxy,   Sorry you have to have chemo, but glad it's been decided, if that makes sense. The monthly threads are great and Jo is on the February one. Good that they aren't hanging around. If it's any consolation, most people I'm in touch with aren't finding it too bad. Certainly not debilitating.   Ali x ... View more

Lovely weekend, Susan. You're such a star keeping track of everyone for us x   So good luck, Emily, Lexxy, Sarah and Elizabeth.    It's a a beautiful but freezing day in London, I'm planning hot chocolate and pretending to work. Hope everyone finds some happy moments, no matter what they are doing.    Ali xxxxx ... View more

Oh, Beedot,   Now I'm in tears too. But in a very good way!    Ali x ... View more

Hi, Elizabeth,   Hopefully you got back to sleep for a bit.    So, yes ask about a wig fitting. It's good timing, as with chemo stating in two weeks, you've probably got a month before you need it. The sentinel node biopsy sounds scary, but it's not a huge operation, try not stress about that too much. The waiting for results is probably the worst bit. I'd suggest getting a firm date/appointment for that before the op. In terms of seeing your BCN, I haven't seen mine at all apart from my first three visits (biopsy, diagnosis then follow up diagnosis). But practice varies hugely.   I'm really sorry you're feeling so bad, and it's perfectly understandable. There are lots of emotions people go through, fear, anger, resentment. Not everyone feels them all, but it's entirely normal. It's great that you talked to your ex-colleague, maybe you can keep in touch. If if it all becomes too much, maybe ask your BCN about access to some psychological support.    For what it's worth, when I had some moments of thinking 'why me', it helped to turn it round. Why not me? It could have been my best friend, one of my sisters, the stranger next to me on the tube. Despite everything else, there's a huge random element to this. It's mostly just a bit of bad luck.    Hope you have an ok day   Ali x ... View more

Gorgeous pic, Alex. Great to see you looking so well.   Hope everyone is having a good day    Ali x ... View more

Hey, Jackie. Dr Google says 4-11 is normal, so I think you are fine. Mine were high after chemo 1.    If you hair hair has come out, they've definitely put some o that poison in you, so don't stress.   Ali x ... View more

Emily, have a lovely day.   Elizabeth, your work colleagues sound lovely, hope today is ok for you. Are you having an op next weeek, or into chemo first?   Strudel, even if he isn't a friend it's still a shock. Too many intimations of mortality for any of us.   Jane, how are the bruises? Sarah how's the new boob? Alex, your implant looks amazing. Em, are you coming home?   Hope everyone else is ok, I'm off to work in a bit. Travelling by boat- there are some perks to living in Greenwich.   Ali x         ... View more

Hi, Robin.   Don't stress. While Blueash is correct about the motivation for the injections, quite a lot of areas don't give them. I'm at Guy's and they essentially said if your white cell count drops so low you're in danger, we will treat you then! It seems to be purely a resourcing issue. They reckon only 5-10% of people need intervention on this. So don't want to treat 90% unnecessarily.    I'm having to travel on the tube etc and currently wrapping a scarf over my face as I go, I've made myself quite nervous and then decided that as long as I'm rigorous about taking my temperature etc I can always access treatment.      Ali x ... View more

Oh, egg how frustrating. But as you say a couple of days isn't too long a delay. And better than being really ill. (Obviously, cancer is 'really' ill, but you know what I mean.)    wtp -wooohoooo re the tumour shrinkage. I've got my MRI booked for after my third cycle, so I'm keeping everything crossed.    Ali x ... View more

Here you go, Strudel, to save trawling. I wasn't showing off Dylan, just that I've opted out of wigs and into wraps.   And yes, I did laugh a bit. She started by saying, do you have any psychological issues, anger, anxiety? I said well I'm pretty pi**ed off that I've got breast cancer, but she didn't even smile.    ... View more

Ah, Strudel you got results while I was writing. Fantastic news, and no chemo either. You must be so relieved.   Time to start thinking about whether you'd like to change your life in a good way.......   Ali x ... View more

Strudel and Sarah, I suspect you're going to be in danger of exploding soon. It's so ridiculously inefficient. We are all wasting time and energy stressing about things that should be done, quickly and in a given timeframe. Although I don't know whether to be pleased or shocked that Jane's onc is equally thoughtless, despite being private. I think I've said this before, but my previously pretty low opinion of many doctors is falling steadily as we go through this.   Emily, take care. And Alex, so glad you're doing well. Em, are you getting out tomorrow still?    On the bright side, my district nurse turned up and dressed my PICC line. She didn't know much about me so asked what kind of cancer I've got. When I said breast, she went, "Oh, bless you" which was sort of odd but sweet. We then had to complete a huge questionnaire to formulate my care plan. (Basically my care plan is, change my dressing once a week). Amongst the questions were, Are you immobile? Can you feed yourself and Do you have bed sores? I mean, I have spent a lot of time on the sofa this month, but things really aren't that bad. She then checked whether I was being abused, and asked if I felt free to express my sexuality and my spiritual needs. I'm not taking the p**s really. I know these things are important, but I did wonder whether she might have spent less time with me and more with soneone who needs actual nursing. (Yes, I'm an ungrateful wretch!) Anyway at least I have a nice clean dressing, albeit with a manky, grubby, tubal bandage on top, because she forgot that.    Thanks for saying the scarf looks nice, Susan. Most of the time I look like a fat Jean Luc Picard (love Star Trek) but I made an effort for the grandson pics.   Ali xxx     ... View more

Hope it goes well wtp.   So thanks, all for the lovely comments. I'm a bit embarrassed as I genuinely was showing off the scarves not me. Wtp I can relate completely. Those photos are nice, but when I walk around the house with my massive bald pate, I don't see glamour. I see Richard O'Brien (without make up). I too have put on weight, and I was already fat because I did my knee ligament in last May, and it was just healed as I found the lump.   But I think you're right wtp, this is about our perception of ourseleves, not other peoples'. So from now on, I am seeing an Amazonian warrior, albeit with a rather unfetching patch of stubble behind my left ear. (Wish those last follicles on my head would just give up!).   Also a delayed thank you for the PICC line info, JoJo. Mine's been sore and I was becoming a bit concerned, so that was really helpful.   Ok, I'm off to wait for the District Nurse to visit and to practice Amazonian thoughts.   Have a very good day all   Ali xxx     ... View more

Wow Alex, good going on the 2am post. Hope you get home and Em, hope you don't have to wait too long.   Strudel can you say good luck to Charl from me, or more likely given the time, I hope it went well. I have a very unexciting day, waiting for the District Nurse to change my PICC line dressing. I am thinking of chanelling the 1960s and hope she turns up on a massive bicycle.   Have a good day all.   Ali x     ... View more

And here's another. I look a lot happier as I'm holding my brand new grandson. I've chosen the picture for best view of the scarf!    Ali x ... View more

So here was my first go. I look a bit serious.    Ali x   ... View more

Oh, stefr you really are going through it aren't you? I'm so sorry.    As as everyone else has said, there is no need to apologise. On top of the other advice, I wonder if you have someone who could advocate for you with your OH? I am thinking maybe his sister or mother? Or a mutual friend? I'm thinking that might be more successful than asking soneone who is seen as being your friend.   i realise that depression is a serious illness, but I also know that sometimes mental health problems are seen as giving people a pass on behaving properly. (Don't be cross anyone who disagrees). Our eldest son is schizophrenic and pretty well most of the time. But sometimes he's selfish and inconsiderate to his wife. This may or may not be related to his schizophrenia. His father (mostly) has at times stepped in (when asked) and told our son that his illness doesn't buy him a pass out of being a considerate, decent husband, He does it gently and with love, but he's also firm about it. It has been transformative in terms of helping our son cope and improving things for our daughter-in-law. It might be worth seeing if you can find soneone to help with this. An alternative would be couples counselling, but it may not be easy to get him there.   Alix     ... View more