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Bluecat
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since
01-10-2020
56
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65
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09-10-2020
03:30
2 Hugs
thanks Evie, ❤ Its just how my mind works!! I think if I was a radiologist or consultant I would also wait to go over any treatment cases as im assuming it takes abit of time...so in my silly head I am putting 2 and 2 together I havent eaten anything today my eyes are stinging from crying but hubby will be home soon so thst will feel better. Thsnks so much Tilli and Evie for kind words, 💗 we can virtual hold hands!! Sundays are worst for me for some reason so I really must get myself busy xx
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09-10-2020
03:25
1 Hug
Hi Tili, Thank you, yes im just so so concerned, I really am, trying to find answers, I feel sick and definitely out in the cold. Im certainly not myself since last night. All the fears from having a marker put in, to having a late appointment...its only because I rang them and they have scheduled an appointment ready,I haven't actually received my letter yet in the post. I cant believe they would have got the biopsy back by then?? I only had it Tuesday afternoon?? Im shocked its come back that quick, if it has that is. Do they pre schedule appointments ready? I cannot believe this is actually happening....one minute im strong as an ox then anything that doesn't feel or sound right im all over the place again. I feel exhausted from worry. Thank uou for your kind words, you certainly picked up on how scared I am... Xx
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09-10-2020
01:29
3 Hugs
Hi, sorry been on here alot taking up you lovely time 💗 I font think things are looking good, im going from one bad scenario to another.... Its now dawned on me that I guessed how late my biopsy appointment is (4pm) and I'm assuming that its late to discuss a treatment plan...all my thoughts snd fears are back. Why else have a scheduled late appointment?? Cannot deal with this, its too real and bloody scarey... Xx
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09-10-2020
10:51
Hi, I am exactly in the same position with waiting to find out. I have called the 0800 number on here and spoke to a lovely lady that just put everything into perspective, so that may help? I know what you mean about the sinking to stomach feeling as my fears managed to creep in last night even thought I shut the box at the hospital ! Im going to lock it with a key!! Ironically chewing over everything and talking helps us move forward into a stronger position whatever we are faced with... I'm scared about being told face to face whatever the circumstances are, these are just my own fears. Whatever you do, do not look up Dr Google though, it will not do you anygood my lovely!! I'm seeing a consultant on Wednesday 14th, which is the day before my sons 11plus and day before my birthday to find out the results of the biopsy, not too stressful 😬 i know i won't deal with it very well, but im going to try my hardest!! Its not until 4pm. We will hsve to keep ourselves occupied until we get told what the results are, so im going to immerse myself into bubblegum tv and a few glasses of wine with a friend tonight, but i haven't told any friends or family until I get the results, thats just me as I prefer to talk on here about it. If you arent going through it people don't understand it, well in my mind that is, thats not obviously everyone 😉 . I wish you all the best though, keep us updated on your appointment! X
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09-10-2020
10:14
Both of you have been amazing and given me the best advice I can only say thank you 💗 💗 😘
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09-10-2020
10:11
2 Hugs
After a couple if hours having an inner wobbly, and waking up in the night, you are both right Jan and Evie, you have both given me amazing advice 💗 I'm going to go into the appointment when I get my date scheduled and im going to put my big girl pants on again. I've just spoken to one of the nurses on the 0800 number, fantastic calm lady! She did explain that as I haven't had a mammogram before they need to know if these calcifications are " normal " for me or not, hence the biopsy, it just makes sense what she was saying, plus a few other tips she gave me, it just puts it all into perspective 💗 ... and it is routine to see your consultant face to face regardless of the result. Thank you ladies, no doubt I will continue to post up until my appointment! 💗 xx
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09-10-2020
07:51
2 Hugs
Thanks Jan 💗 trouble is I've already pressed the red button by emailing them and said i would not be attending any face to face appointments and to email it to me. I think i want the initial shock on my own, then have a follow up appointment with them. I know it seems abit of an odd way but I need to be on control of my own initial response. Psychologically I need home for the initial response so I can just breath fresh air. My throat will close up at the hospital and I will pass out! Then the thought of having blood pressure air and gas does not do anything for me lol or having to stay their! nce Once I know i can then move forward about any treatments required. Im just preparing myself for the worst. I'm guessing they are deciding what type of calcifications it is from the biopsy. I'm that much of a control freak I hated the fact that they even took something from my body to test it 😒 I've never been so frightened in my life...
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08-10-2020
07:27
Good to hear from you, am hear any time you wa g to chat 💗 xx
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08-10-2020
05:24
1 Hug
Hi Rubytodd, Thought I would stop by and just seen your post. I think we are all in this same boat with worries about recalls and appointments 💗 I'm no expert on here as I am going through similar circumstances my self so I do completely understand. The only thing I guess I can advise you is to do something to take your mind off the recall and distract yourself from it. Ive recently learned myself that fears are not facts, I myself did not want to waste time worrying about something that I do not know about. So ive managed those emotions and they are parked in a box at the hospital at the moment! So its just trying to find a way of managing those fears and emotions until your appointment. Ive been on walks, i work, plus a 10 year old to deal with and at night I treat myself to a nice glass of wine and watch bubble gum TV to take the edge off. Its not everyone's cup of tea, but i hope it helps Xx
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08-10-2020
01:17
2 Hugs
Hi I'm going to be getting a letter shortly to confirm my appointment results from a biopsy next week. I've parked my concerns for now...but for me to deal with the whole process im trying to manage how I will deal with being in the consultancy room which seems more worrying to me than the actual result. Ironically I can handle what will come my way, I think! I know this sounds absolutely ludicrous, but the thought of being sat one side of the table and the clinician sat with a folder on the other side of the table with my future in that folder 📂 is just overwhelming 😳 ...there just seems too much power for me and my little life sitting in the corner waiting to see what journey i will be on. Don't get me wrong I have complete faith and admiration for these Angels, I really do. But I cannot handle the power ( in my head that is!) I'm not sure if it has anything to do with my job as im an investigator and the thought of me being in the vulnerable position does not bode well... So I am.considering if they will let me have the results through the post or my doctor to explain it to me, at least there isn't a table between us... which seems better than having to go to hospital receiving bad news... I'm trying to prepare myself for the worst, i csn do that, but its the set up of the room that bothers me...i know this must just sound mad to anyone that reads this!! So I guess my question is, do you have to actually go in for the appointment 🤔 ? Is it always normally done this way?? X
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08-10-2020
09:08
1 Hug
Hi Juliecat1, Bless you 💗 the waiting is certainly the worst because its unknown territory until you get there. I dont know if it helps or not but you could try " parking" your worrying time which was excellent advice on here. That is easier said than done though for some people... Part of me thought I dont want to waste any more time worrying about something I do not know any facts or been given facts about, because it can consume you and it really is quite exhausting.. With me I have control issues over how information is relayed to me rather than the actual information which is obviously important! How its done is far more important to me ironically than dealing with what card I've been given, but then thats because I'm a control freak by nature and I'm not good being in a vulnerable situation, so im currently trying ways to manage that right now! So in my case I've been told I have a calcification, but to rule anything out I had a biopsy as there are different types of calcifications, so im not out of the woods yet. So now I am waiting again, but I've managed to "park" my problem for now, but also trying to put my emotions and fears into perspective too and manage my emotions otherwise it will consume me and make me poorly. So, I try to keep myself busy, walking is a good distraction and also I watch alot of bubblegum TV like Love Islands! It just takes the edge off... I really hope this helps 💗
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07-10-2020
07:32
1 Hug
Hi Juliecat1, Thought I would pop by from one forum friend to another 💗 I am experiencing the same worries but not the same symptoms. I'm not an experienced person on here, but you have done the right thing and got yourself an appointment with the breast clinic so that's the first step out of the way 💗 . All I can say is have faith in your breast clinic, these are truly amazing people. What I did was occupy myself until I had my appointment as this was a big issue for me too. It sounds like you have a very supportive husband too. I'm still not out of the woods with my results and how I handle the next stage will be interesting as I don't take information that well! Us ladies are so brave and you did the first step all you need to do is let the breast clinic do their job now...leave it with them now. I guess for me psychologically in my head that is, I have left the problem in a box with the breast clinic, its now with them. ( this may not be everyone's way of dealing with things but it's helped me). I hope this may help.a little...I think everyone finds their own way eventually how to deal with this journey we are all on. As I at I'm certainly no experience person but I'm all ears if you need to chat 💗 xx
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06-10-2020
09:28
1 Hug
Thank you so much Evie, such lovely kind words as always 💗 Yes that's a good idea, I think I will consider giving them a call and I'm wondering if for my own well being they will consider putting it in writing or email. I've read that most calcifications are benign but I dont think I can take the " ultimate news" particularly well..so I'm going to ask for it in writing, even if its relayed to my doctors that's better than having to go to the hospital again ( for me that is!) I hate not being in control Evie, I'm an investigator as an occupation and usually im the one sitting the otherside of the table!! so its partly feeling that vulnerbility on my part even though I know they are there to help.me!! Today was different as they had gadjects poking and prodding me which took the pressure off me ( to a degree!). Also i had a titanium clip put in but only learned from this site that its because calcifications cannot be felt and if I do need surgery they can then locate it easily, I'm assuming I will have surgery, but I'm not thinking the worst case scenario either, they seem to know what they are doing at my clinic, they new straight away it was a calcification and could also see it on the US. They know exactly what the case is and I have faith in them, even though they didn't ask me if I wanted a biopsy and a metal chip in me 😂 they just did it because they know what they are doing or planning. My thoughts, fears really are irrelevant... I have every faith in what they are doing so far. And under the Covid circumstances I feel very privileged to have this degree of investigations as they could well be saving my life 💗 My life has revolved around stones!! My husband thinks I'm just one big old stalegtite !! Xx
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06-10-2020
05:49
Hi, I have everything crossed for you try to do something to take your mind off it, but i certainly understand how you are feeling 💗 I hope all goes well and let us know how you get on 😘 Xx
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06-10-2020
05:44
1 Hug
Hi, just wanted to say thank you so much for all your lovely responses 😘 ladies you are truly amazing 💗 So today went ok, I was told that they could see a calcification on my right breast which is the area thats been bothering me...ironically not where its prickly to the touch. So I wonder if this has bee just picked up on the off chance and that the prickling is hormone related... The ultrasound confirmed the calcification too as he could clearly see this and to make sure its nothing else to be concerned about i had a biopsy to rule out anything else as im assuming they need to make sure its definitely a calcification i guess. I must admit had I of been told about the biopsy process in the first place you probably would have dragged me there as i certainly did not like that part!! I'm going to need some pain killers tonight! 😩 It was a relief to hear that there was no tumours, but I still have this awful.feeling that something isn't quite right and im still on this roundabout? The only weird funny side to this is that my body likes making pearls 📿 🦪 as I had a gall bladder removal 2 years ago and I had a stone stuck, maybe I was a pearl glam in previous life 🙈 so had an awful procedure to get rid of that!! Plus I've had calcium deposits elsewhere in my body 😬 . But I must not forget that calcifications can either be pre cancerous or still cancerous so im not out of the woods yet otherwise they wouldn't have done the biopsy. Also, could I have some advice from anyone thats had a biopsy if you have to go in for your results, its just that I would prefer it in a letter..is it standard to have to come in as they seemed adamant it will be a face to face appointment and that I will get a letter? This part i am not looking forward too and not so confident ss the biopsy is a final assessment and I will be bricking it 😟 Xx
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06-10-2020
08:20
2 Hugs
Hi Tili 👋 💗 Thanks so much for stopping by 💗 I slept quite well, so now let's face the music at 2pm!! 💪 You will all be the first to know...xx
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05-10-2020
06:29
3 Hugs
Hi all, thought I would send one more post before I have my mammogram and ultrasound tomorrow. Im actually strangely feeling brave this afternoon and wearing my big girl pants! ( even though I do have niggles in the back of my mind). Im just going to deal with what comes my way head on and face the music.. I've read so many stories on here and there is nothing that makes me so special! its inspiring so im going in with a positive mental attitude... Tomorrow I will know what journey I will be taking and will share it with you guys, my husband will be at my sons parent consultation at the same time! So 2 strangely important events at the same time ! I have bought myself a chocolate bar and a cup of tea for tonight and watching Love Island 🙈 night all and 🤞 to anyone who has their appointments tomorrow as I really will be thinking of you ladies 💗 💗
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05-10-2020
04:58
2 Hugs
Lots of positive vibes and hugs from fellow forum friends 💗 🤗 ready for tomorrow xx
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05-10-2020
03:49
2 Hugs
Hi, Sounds like you have been through all the tests you possibly can and have faith in your Breast Clinic, but just keep an eye on things for changes 💗 I'm not an expert on here and going through abit of turmoil myself but I wonder if you are more emotionally affected with a family history of it? These ladies on here provide such amazing advice and im sure there is some help you can contact... All the best x
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05-10-2020
10:32
1 Hug
Good luck tomorrow, we will all be thinking of you 💗
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