How I empathise with you. I had a similar diagnosis to you in December and had a bilateral mastectomy with tissue expanders and will have the reconstruction completed after chemo and rads.
I wish I'd had the opportunity to talk to someone in the same position as the fear I felt before surgery was overwhelming. In fact the fear of the unknown is nowhere near the reality.
I was relatively pain free after the op - take any painkillers offered even if you feel you don't need them! My underarm felt stiff and numb - still does in fact- where the lymph nodes were removed. Keep doing the post-op exercises as they really help and I have full movement on both sides now.
As I had the tissue expanders in when I woke up I was not completely flat chested, but to be honest I was so relieved to have got rid of the tumours that I didn't care what I looked like at that point.
At first I could not believe that there would be a second in the day that I was not consumed by fear, sadness and dark thoughts but believe me it gets better. I'm taking one step at a time - op over - tremendous relief, now chemo - every one I do is a step further along the road. Not thinking of what comes next, can only cope with one thing at a time!
I have found a brilliant blog this week which has helped me - alrighttit.blogspot.com - the author is in a very similar situation to us and its great to read her brilliantly written thoughts of her journey from diagnosis (June 2008) to present day - I hope it helps you too.
I will be thinking of you and hope all goes well. Take care of yourself
Love & Hugs xxxx
... View more