Breast Cancer Now Forum

Hello everyone on Mothering Sunday, Chocciemuffin, I did not get anything either from my 14yr old, he is too busy with his BMX bike to think about such things...My 18 yr old (He lives with his dad} dropped by with a scrunched up card and then asked me about some money! I am realising that this is the last weekend, I am to have of feeling relatively 'normal' for some time as the 1st chemo is on Fri, this waiting is too awful. I do not want to go out once I start it as I feel people will look at me in weird way. I guess I can always stick my tongue out at them! I am not overly concerned about se, but the descriptions of what it can do to hands and feet are particularly disconcerting. I guess that's the bit that people see and is difficult to cover hands. I hope everyone else is doing ok? I know that Rae is starting on the 22nd. Is anyone else starting this week with chemo? I recall someone is, but I have forgotten who. WS ... View more

Hi All, Thank-you for your prompt response you are all amazing. I feel that people on here are looking out for me. That's such a nice thought. Carolyn, I don't think I am having Herceptin as no one has suggested a heart scan, Dj007, - your thoughts on trusting my team, are spot on and I do feel I trust them. The onc was really good and sat on the floor next to me when I felt utterly overwhelmed! How many docs do that? Chocciemuffin, - Your knowledge is amazing!! I had just had a peek at the chemo timetable and under Event it says: (for 3 sessions) B EC 3W SC 4h. - I have no idea what that means, but I do know for def my hair will come out as I have been told that. I understand that following this I have to have 3 more sessions, they do want to try to shrink the lump 1st. I hope you don't mind me asking these questions of you all. I do feel safer knowing it is from people who are going through the same thing. Thank you all!! WS ... View more

Hello all, Horsie5050, I think I know where you are going with that one and I will heed your advice! Tina46, Great, thanks for all info. I have clicked on the link you sent and it says page unavailable, I will try later in the week. your explanation about those injections has clarified things for me and I understand they are not routine. Steroids - maybe we don't all get them too. I think it sounds like it depends on a number of factors. I cannot bring myself to talk to the BCN or the helpline here, I would rather find out from ladies who are going thru the same thing, somehow it is less frightening. I am not aware at this point the chemo I am having, I have a print out from the MacMillan Unit but it is indecipherable (SP?) I still do not know what diagnosis I have as read the report hurriedly, but put it back in the envelope as it made me feel ill, I think it says Stage 2, I know I have at least 1 node that has cancer in it. I have had an MRI and CT, but again I know nothing of them. I feel very low most of the time and still shocked, especially as this breast has been a problem for years fibreadenoma removal, and previous biopsies reported as normal breast tissue. Thanks everyone ... View more

Hi All I think York is a bit too far for me (but that's ok). Also I have a son that have to get home for. I would really like to meet with some of you ladies, but I guess for me Halifax or Leeds is best. If any one would like to do that too, could you please let me know. It is my very 1st chemo on the 23rd March - next Friday, so I am uncertain if/when I can get out and about?? - have others been able to do 1st week or so? Gillian ... View more

Hi All, Wintersocks (Gillian) Beryl, it's Gillian not Julia, easy mistake as there are a lot of us on here. I understand what you are saying about reading the letter, and the thing is that is my usual approach as I have had a lot of traumas to deal with in the past. I think I have run out of steam at yet another one - so don't worry no offence we all do things differently - whatever gets us through I guess. Clare (waiting too) I think you and I have a similar approach, I think sometimes we have to be ready, to steady our selves to cope with the next bit. I think the day will come when I am able to do that...whatever i will know soon enough as all will become apparent. Poppyd - you have certainly got so much going on, my thoughts are with you and I hope your son, you and your family all get through the tough times ahead . Am sending you a hug. I am starting chemo next week, (23rd) I have not been asked to do a 'chemo check' - heart etc. do they do that before you start on the day? i have read a lot about giving yourself an injection, what is this for? does everyone have to do this? and lastly. does everyone get steroids? Thank-you all! - Dr's Chemo Gillian or Wintersocks or Socks X ... View more

Hi Julia, I hope you are still feeling ok? I think you had your 1st chemo today? I hope you are still good, and your SE remain minimal. I still have not looked properly at my letter, but feel I am inching towards things, feel I might look at what 'Stage 2' is next. I think it is the only way I can do it. Too much information, just gives me anxiety overload, and I have my 14 yr old to think of. Anyway, I hope by now you are sleeping and still feeling reasnoble, given what you have just had. Best wISHES Gillian ... View more

Hello Rae, and all other ladies, sorry I can't get a grip on who is who at the moment. Rae, I just wanted to say that I too am starting on the 23rd March a few hours behind you. my 1st chemo. At 11. I too have had CT scan and an Mri. I do not know anything about them yet. I am so scared, not so much about chemo, but more about what may be discovered on the scans. I do have a bit of the pathology report, but stuffed it back in the envelope where it still is. But my eye rested on stage 2. - something or other. I am much too scared at the moment to get it out and look. I feel calmer today. but know that won't last. WS (Gillian) ... View more

Hi Southernlucy, just read your post, I don't appear to have anything in the 'PM' box so to speak, but I am not quite used to this website, am just getting the hang of it. I hope you are ok? I am not sure who is who at the moment, I keep getting mixed up with who is who, what diagnosis and where they are from. Maybe I should be comforted that there are so many of us! I got my appointment thru for the Headstrong thing in Halifax, but it is the same morning as my 1st chemo March 23rd. I just don't want to do it at the moment. I still cannot read thru my pathology report, and I know that is not the complete picture as have had an MRI and CT to be discussed with me yet..but think will stick fingers in ears for that one. W'socks (Gillian) ... View more

Hello Charliechuck (Amanda) I live near Hailfax, I am just diagnosed, and starting chemo 23/3/ I think I am a stage 2 - , I am still having scans etc, so I guess do not have my full diagnosis yet. I am really traumatised by everything, it would be great to meet in Halifax/surrounding area If you would like? And anyone else in the Halifax area too. I will wait to hear/watch thread. Socks (Gillian) ... View more

Thank-you Southernlucy, I am still getting used to everyone's name on here. I am at Halifax too. I don't know if we have spoken about that before. I am very pleased with their help so far, I won't answer the phone to m y BCN. She must think me rude or in hiding. Are you still being seen in Halifax or finished now? Socks xx ... View more

Wintersocks here, Chocciemuffin, and Christine. Christine that's exactly how I feel, some of the posts are really frightening, but the women are so amazing. I do feel like I am going on about myself a bit much, I am aware of that, but is early days for me....I promise to help other people down the line, but at the moment I just can't Chocciemuffin, your research for me is brilliant, I do wish you could be with me as I look again at the letter, your posts make me feel a bit calmer. I will tell you which bus to get! It's all just so much to take in, I am aware of the worse case scenario and my mind goes to it all the time, I am not such a positive person at the best of times. Will try to be brave tomorrow, not at home tonight and have had large glass of wine! WS XXX ... View more

I think I have already posted, but can't find it. Hello to all chocciemuffin, gabbylamb, Joan, and Lydia. also anyone else who is a March chemo. My name is Gillian (Wintersocks). I am just saying night to all, I am off to Huddersfield for an MRI tomorrow, so staying overnight at my partners. I am counting down to chemo start 23 @ 11. Gabby I know yours is 22nd. I think you should be my chemo buddy, but will be following you! night all. Gillian X ... View more

To all March ladies, Gabby, Lydia. Your kind words are such a comfort, if it wasn't for you all for sure I would be struggling a whole lot more, I know I should try to talk with someone from the helpline, but it feels so hard. I will see how I go and try to do that. Gabby, It's funny how we 'test' our partners I relate to what you say, mine doesn't live with me (although I am going over to his t omorrow), he has been wonderful though. But I am aware that 1 person cannot shoulder all of this, so I am withdrawing a little and trying to spread it around, so far this site works best for me. you and I will be starting chemo more or less the same time, you 1 day ahead of me. Please let me know how you go. Lydia, you sound so like me, I am terrified of medics as I had a previously undiagnosed illness for 10 years (the docs told me nothing wrong). I ended up really really sick and trying to care for a newborn (I have the Coeliac condition) a gluten allergy, I found it out myself in utter desperation..now that feels a walk in the park compared to this. But I guess I am just going to have to trust the medics this time, but it will be so hard. I wish the chemo to start now, but again, it's the waiting... I know what you mean about our children, not being there for them is too too hard to contemplate but we must be positive if possible , but I think you have the right idea to get some counselling if you can, after all, this with us is very traumatic, and prof help might help. I am aware that all the ladies here are with me and me with them my hands reach out to us all, not strong, quite shakey - but there. P.s is it ok to use our real names? WS ... View more

Hello to all March ladies, I am too about to start chemo on March 23, my 1st session. I am due to have a MRI on Weds. I am utterly terrified by the whole BC thing and am finding I cannot ask any questions to the medics or anyone else. I cannot even talk to the BCN, or anyone in my family or I won't answer my friends calls. I feel utterly stunned and all I can do is feel fearful and watch TV, thank goodness for Sky as there is aways some trash on. The whole chemo thing doesn't scare me too much (perhaps it should?) It's the months and years following when I am sure I will always be thinking it has come back. I have 2 kids 18 and 14, and my partner (not their Dad, he walked out 2 years ago) is very supportive bit I am afraid to 'lean' on him too much in case it drives him away. I am trying to be positive, and the other women on here are an inspiration but I am just not there.... WS ... View more

Thanks all and everyone for your advice. Kinsse, I also have an 18yr old lad, who has always been 'difficult', he is living with his dad, since I have been told about the cancer he won't speak to me. Or amswer my texts. I am just leaving him at the moment, but am here if he wants to talk. I have told him that. I have had a difficult weekend and have not wanted to see or speak to people. Tomorrow I have to go for an MRI. The waiting for the chemo to start is horrid, I feel so tired and I haven't even started treatment yet. I think a good friend may drop by later, but don't really want to see her. 😞 Wintersocks ... View more

Hello there happycat, Think that might be difficult for me to get to. I am the other side of Halifax and I do not drive. I have not yet started treatment (March 23). I would quite like to meet with others, but maybe next time. I still feel deeply traumatised, and a bit 'frozen'. But, i can talk to others on here, if it becomes too much. Wintersocks ... View more

Hi Southernlucy, Thanks for your reply, yes I am stunned, no I don't want to be on here as everyone else doesn't. My emotions are all over the place it's all too awful, thank-god for all the lovely ladies who have replied to me, I can't even re-call most -sorry about that. I am starting with my 1st chemo on the 23rd March then surgery then radiotherapy. I think you have been through most of that already? How are you? Yes, they are wonderful in Halifax Hospital, I was in a right state on my 1st visit to the Mc Unit, it was all too surreal. Re the 15th is that Whiterose in Leeds? WSx ... View more