I don't think there are any easy answers for coping - we all react differently. I'm coping by obsessing about learning everything I can and reading up and planning for treatments. I haven't done so much reading since I was in full time education!!! Part of the issue for me is the lack of control and I feel that the more I understand and whatever tips I can get on chemo or RT or anything BC related then I pull back a tiny, tiny bit of control back to me. I've got lists for everything - Onc questions, surgeon questions, lists for chemo. Completely barmy - but it also keeps me very busy! One thing that cheered me up today was looking at some very old posts (2010) on an American forum - talking about different chemo regimens and trials. The comforting thing was that what was being tested in 2010 is mainstream in 2017! Treatments are improving and your prognosis on Tamoxifen must be good? I've also set myself small health goals - given up smoking, trying to improve my diet, bit of excercise - nothing fancy and all achieveable and all ways I can try and do the best I can to help myself. Trying to get back some control. This is the time to put yourself first and do whatever you need to do to get through it. And you will get through it! My margins weren't clear enough and I've just had my re-excision and get results tomorrow. 2nd surgery was much much easier and I got a little to cocky and went back to work 6 days after surgery and regretted it... didn't take my own advice and I didn't put me first! Remember you are still stage 2 (and I think this is still classed as Early BC - the BCN will advise) - so although it isn't what you hoped to hear - it isn't the worst. I felt much the same when I had my full Path report - TNBC and not clear margins. I have now accepted it for what it is... still have the occassional session of balling my eyes out at 3am when I won't disturb anyone, but I do get up the next day and carry on... the dog needs me if everyone else is fed up with my obsessing! Final tip - if you can't find someone to talk to when needed or your BCN is not avilable - use the helplines - I've always had a good experience. best wishes and don't despair xxx
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