Thanks everyone for all the advice! I should have joined this forum weeks ago!
I really do want to be positive, and I don't actually want to slip back into someone who moans about silly things, so I think I'll maybe try some counselling, bite the financial bullet and reduce my hours a bit for the next few months, and get out of retail. (I am doing the proofreading/editing stuff to give me the option of working part time somewhere, making up the difference with freelance) Has anyone encountered any difficulty telling prospective new employers about the cancer?
(kayty, you sound like I feel! One thing that is encouraging is that, although I'm still really tired, I'm no longer so exhausted that I don't care, so it must be getting better. It is really frustrating, though. I will just keep reminding myself of the alternative/what the outcome could have been, and of how I felt at my worse, which was about a month ago. It just seems to be taking forever to get back to 'normal'.)
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Help! I was diagnosed in February, had the surgery in March, and finished radiotherapy in July. I felt quite rough while recovering from the radiotherapy, so didn't start back to work until the middle of August. I enjoyed my job (in a bookshop) before the illness, but things changed while I was ill- the job is different (less fun/more corporate) and I'm different! I am very miserable and desperately need a change. I'm exhausted every day, really depressed, and finding it hard to work through the week without crying/feeling desperate about not having the time and money to find another job. I feel so grateful to be alive, and can't stand to hear people complaining about insignificant things- I'm afraid I'll lose my temper, and my job, if I 'lose it' and tell people to shut the heck up and quit moaning. The world is full of people with real troubles and impossible situations, and these folks are angry because a book hasn't come in 2 days after they've ordered it... I used to be able to rise above all that... now I feel utterly trapped and anxious, and the Tamoxifen isn't helping: can't sleep, and have mega-flushes throughout most nights. This all seems so whiny when I've been given this second chance, and that the people I work for have been so accommodating during my illness. I actually hate my job/resent the time I spend there. I'm working toward becoming a freelance proofreader/editor, but need to work in the meantime to afford the courses/pay the bills. Any suggestions for sleeping/getting a better attitude??
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