Breast Cancer Now Forum

Vent away - I also feel Christmas has been hijacked - not by a mastectomy to be true, but my mother’s care package at home is failing so I have to collect her on Friday and take her to a care home down the road from me and get her a place there. That’s my priority for today. there’s no time like the present though.  Seagulls ... View more

The waiting & the not knowing is terrible. I was diagnosed in May & have been back n forth for many tests (which I still have pain from now) but told very little what was happening along the way, I hope you have had better contact with your team. I saw a consultant (seen 3 different ones so far) Friday & was very surprised to hear that I am having my operation on Monday. Hang in there hope you aren't waiting much longer  Hugs x   ... View more

Yeh, ordinarily implant surgery would be an easier experience than yours has so unfortunately been. So you've a few weeks yet until you're seen again and able to get more info. Keep in mind having a chat to the nurses on the helpline no. on here, or posting on their section if you're needing or wanting some independent advice, suggestions if you're struggling to obtain more info.  So did you tell your girls that they're to blame for your not being able to have the Diepp??!! 😆   I never wanted self tissue recon. Skinny, so only lat flap possible. Didn't want to compromise/weaken my back muscles, have extra scars to heal, extra infection risks, chaffing from rucksack straps to scars with being a walker etc. But it's quite a lengthy slog and multiple procedures from mastectomy flatness. A year or so in all, and other things kept getting in the way, knocking me off the horse. I love all animals, but cats definitely make me go all soft. Just think they're such beautiful creatures, whether domestic mogs or lions and all inbetween. Sorry yours was only young. Have you ever watched cat behaviourist, Jackson Galaxy's tv prog "My Cat From Hell"? It amazes me what he comes up with/knows how to solve difficult behaviours. If you haven't, it's on the Really channel daily at 4pm. I also love "The Dog House" where they match up suitable rescue dogs to people's wishes and then show you how they are later, and "happily ever after". Or "happily doggy after"!  😊 Please will you keep us informed with how things are going with your boob. What's happening, and how you go on at your appointment.    Lots of love,  Dellycat-Delly  x ❤️ x                ... View more

Hi Jo, My private message function on here isn’t working, constantly getting a message saying I’ve reached my limit of messages..weird as I haven’t sent any others. I’ve FB messaged instead. Louise x ... View more

Best of luck to you both for tomorrow's operations. I so understand the feeling of actually looking forward to it - it does seem a strange thing to say and feel but the surgery moves you on in such a big and positive way. The way things are organised across the country seems to vary so much and everyone appears to have a slightly different experience. I feel so lucky that my hospital has a specialist Breast Unit which is headed up by my wonderful surgeon who specialises in cosmetic, oncoplastic and breast reconstructive surgery. I have seen him and my breast cancer nurse at every appointment and I've never seen anyone else, no oncologist or plastics surgeon. It's worked so well for me and they've always been very open, honest and detailed - good and bad.  Louise, you mentioned bras. I'm sure you're sorted now but I've been really around the block with this. I'm a standard 38B M&S. I ended up with 40C compression bras from Amoena - I had a 40C zip up post surgery bra from M&S which felt way too tight on the band post surgery and now are too baggy on the cups. The Amoena bras were beautifully soft and very adjustable as things changed - well worth the investment (my BCN gave me a discount code). I'm now finding my usual 38B bras tight on the band so I've gone for some band expanders - not prepared to invest in any more bras until things have completely settled down. Hope all goes well with your surgeries tomorrow and look forward to hearing from you both when you're feeling up to it.   ... View more

Ahhh..yes 🙄 👏 It’s click on the title/heading. Not sure how I missed that. Thank you! ... View more

Hi joannemarie, sorry you find yourself here but well done for reaching out.  It’s a really tough time after diagnosis with lots of anxiety and lots of new information to take in.  It’s like landing on another planet.  Here is BCN information on Letrozole which you may find helpful (apologies for adding to your big pile of brochures) https://breastcancernow.org/information-support/publication/letrozole-femara-bcc64  I take Tamoxifen and it took a little while for the side effects to settle down. I eat healthy and don’t drink (except for an occasional one) and keep fit by hiking lots.  These things have helped me to still feel great whilst on medication.  I had 8 rounds of chemo, surgery and radiotherapy back in 2017.  There are lots of us getting back on with life again after breast cancer so I hope this makes you feel a little less anxious.  I was 48 at diagnosis with no family history (except my paternal gran who got it in her late 70s but that doesn’t count as history apparently).  It’s a big shock and hard to accept this is happening to you but it gets easier.  If you’re sure that you’re HER2+ then you’ll probably also be on Herceptin.  Sending hugs. X ... View more

Hi Lucy, My experiences are different from your so no specific help there, hopefully someone with better experience will answer that for you, but I just wanted to say hi and offer some support.  I know that two different cancers can be found in one breast, so logically you could have two different on each side, or maybe as likely that it’s the same type, your physical tendency has meant that rather than it spreading, you were predisposed to developing it on both sides. Either way, I’m sorry you’re in this situation, it’s a huge shock and so hard to get your head around.  From what I’ve read on here (I was diag June ‘20), lots of people question their onc teams approach, ‘have they missed something’ ‘is this the best option’ and so on, I do the same.  For some a second opinion offers much needed perspective but if you don’t go a second opinion route,  I think you have to try to trust your team. Everything with BC is easier said than done though.  It looks like they have a plan for double checking which is reassuring. I was told research is okay, but stay off US sites and random stuff, this website and Macmillan were recommended to me at my hospital. I really need to understand things fully, that’s how I work, so I read up on things related to my personal circumstances and worries, write any questions and concerns I have down and then go through them with my onc and BCN in more detail which is usually helpful. I’m a ‘questioner’ thoughI question everything and always have a long list 😊 . Phone your BCN to ask anything you need to. 💐 ... View more

Thank you - it is overwhelming but you’re right one day at a time is key x ... View more

Covid doesn’t seem (from everything that’s been said/referred to so far) to be an issue at my hospital, in terms of affecting treatment. Suffolk where I am, and Norfolk where the hospital is, have had some of the lowest infection rates in the country and I know last week when I was there it had no cases. Still many strict precautions but it hasn’t changed any of my treatment plan. NHS in my area (and prob nationwide?) are using local private hospitals (eg Spire) for the ops, which have remained completely ‘clean’ from Covid. Swab 3 days before op date.  Onc breast surgeon is just offering the immediate reconstruction as a potential suitable/preferred option...I said all things considered I would probably opt for immediate rather than delayed reconstruction as my preference and he was very supportive of that. I believe it will completely depend on my SLNB results being clear, and I have to see the plastics surgeon first anyway to ascertain what might be my best option, e.g., implant or one of the skin flap surgeries. Onc surgeon has also said symmetry surgery can/will be done to even me up, but I don’t know the timescale for that. Likely same time if implant, or later if flap as that’s such a long surgery.  So much to think about and research, the same for you I’m sure. I’m used to my hereditary condition causing complications In any medical scenario...it’s very rare so it’s really rare that any doctor has heard of it let alone met a patient with it. It’s always fine (had other, though more minor surgeries before) , just have to get all the info and precautionary measures in place first. xx ... View more

Glad to be on the journey with you Louise & sounds like we're quite similar in outlook! I am also organised, practical & a problem solver...not used to asking for help which makes this journey hard!! I'm here if you get dark moments, it is ok to be sad and even better if the person you talk to knows how you feel ❤️ . I think I must still be a bit in denial, I'm sad but I'm a huge optimist so I don't think it's really hit me yet, the severity of it all that is. I think I'm still searching for the solution... My boys are 21 and 19 so they're coping ok but it was so hard to tell them. I'm sorry your daughter is taking it hard but I do think it is good to cry and talk about it. It's such a difficult time for everyone. Keep in touch  😊 Jo xxx ... View more

Hello again, nice of you to get back and reply and I'm glad us members have helped you feel less alone. I'm also used to being a carer, so I sympathise with how you're feeling. It felt really strange people looking at me and asking me how I was! I think us carers have to learn to focus on our own health and well-being as we're so used to putting others first, so it can feel a bit strange and worrisome, but I kind of needed to remind myself that I had to look after myself too. I was also worried about having the physical/emotional energy to carry on with my caring role, but some of the things I worried about weren't as bad in reality, and with others, some of the things turned out not to be a problem after all, or something else came along in time that helped. When you do get the chance to talk to the dr/specialist, mention all these things as they are very used to it and good with ideas/helping you find any extra support etc. I think I talked to my GP about it and it just helped to talk really and be understood, plus she gave me some practical advice for keeping well, sleeping well etc.  And yes, I felt guilty too about what I was putting people through even though I also knew it wasn't logical! It helped to talk to myself how I'd talk kindly to someone else in my position. It's weird how common it is to feel somehow responsible when we know that blooming cancer is just common and random, and with breast cancer the biggest factor is simply being female and being older - maybe being carers makes us extra used to feeling responsible and like we should sort everything out by ourselves. Good to get some of the pent up emotion out, it does help - probably better than binge-watching tv to distract myself like I did! Sometimes you need to let it out, sometimes you need to distract/keep busy, you find what works for you at different times. There's various ideas on this website and an app to help keep well emotionally and physically too I think. Keep on keeping on x   ... View more