Breast Cancer Now Forum

Hi everyone , lovely to hear from you and find out you are doing. I was just reading my diary from last year, and I finished my radiotherapy a year ago today.  I’m very happy in my new house by the sea and I try not to think too much  about recurrence but instead am trying to do as much as I can to enjoy life. I do tai chi, volunteer in a charity shop, do my garden and I started going to a life drawing class. Our first model was a large lady who had had a mastectomy and other surgeries and she was so body confident and comfortable in her own skin I found it really helpful. I’m getting to know some people here now and I’m looking forward to another summer on the beach. I’ve taken letrezole for 11 months now but have just stopped for a month, with my oncologist’s agreement. It’s not been great, I have joint and muscle pain, hot flushes, fatigue and I’ve lost about a third of my hair so my scalp is quite visible in places, and feel like an old woman. Well to be fair, I am 65, and did get covid on my birthday, which might have added to feeling fatigued.  I think the oncologist will want to try me on another drug, but I’m not sure I can commit to another 9 years of feeling this way. More decisions.   This group was so helpful to me, it was so good to be able to talk openly about dark days and difficult feelings to people who understood. The world seems in a dark place right now as well. However I wish you all strength and contentment.   Carman 🌸 🌼 🌞 ... View more

Hi Leaw, Lou and everyone  so good to hear your news. Sounds like there have been some difficult ups and downs Lou, I hope you are now on a safe, smooth (and perky) path!  I am well and just having two year follow ups. Have breast ca all clear and waiting to hear about the lung ca. I feel well and am adjusting to life after the trauma of diagnosis and treatment. And it definitely is a trauma. I find i am still processing and trying to adjust to how to live in the moment and enjoy what I have without worrying about the future. It’s a strange balancing act. There seem to be so many stories in the media about people dying with cancer atm, or maybe i am just noticing them more than i did in the past, anyhow I do get flooded with feelings for the person and their family and it stirs up my own anxiety. But generally I find daily life takes my attention and I am less and less focused on ca. I definitely decided against returning to work as a clinical psychologist, I don’t have the emotional resources for it, but I would like a part time shop job once i am not worried about covid. Maybe next year? Leaw do fill is in on your news. And is anyone else still seeing these threads? kath x ... View more

Hi, I had a left side mastectomy and LD reconstruction 3 weeks ago.  I had the choice of implant or LD, the implant would sit in a hammock under the skin - the downside would be rippling of the implant which would show through the skin. The surgeon suggested the LD, taking muscle from my back, bringing it through my underarm and putting in the front - everything stays connected so theres no need to reconnect blood supply etc. I wasnt able to keep the nipple as the cancer was connected, so instead of this I have a flat round piece of skin from my back (presumably with the muscle attached underneath).  I had two drains which stayed in for a week, and the dressings came off then too. I have good movement in my arms and more strength than I expected. Some parts of my back and new boob are still numb but feeling is coming back although it will take a few months, but all good. My underarm is swollen still from where they created a tunnel to bring the muscle through but again in time this will reduce. I have a foot long scar down my back which is healing surprisingly well, although I feel some discomfort as I move about depending on whether sitting, twisting etc but not constant. I manage this with Ibuprofen and paracetamol as advised by the hospital. No driving for 4-6 weeks and no heavy lifting (vaccuming included), walking as exercise is encouraged but nothing else active apart from personal life 😉 if you feel up to it! The only weird part is the muscle settling down in the front - so I might pick a plate up and feel a slight twitch on my chest, I suspect its just getting used to it/settling down.  I hope I've given enough information to help you.  ... View more

We will have to get an April chemo thread going. I will be having chemo, but don’t have a date yet but will be April sometime. Oh the Joys!!! ... View more

Thanks a lot for the link blackcat, will watch it tonight. It's helpful to hear about other ladie's experiences.  Silvertong thanks for advice, I will write down any side effects to see if there is a pattern. Had first kadcycla on Friday and so far I feel normal. Am getting my energy back after 5 months of neoadjuvant chemo. We are lucky to have these new treatments for HER2 positive cancers... so glad I don't have side effects yet this time. Have a heart scan booked for April with a cardiologist, but they told me not to worry that the slower heart beat could be due to anemia. I feel in good hands...       ... View more

So grateful to you for posting even if its a year out. I am awaiting chemo and was looking for some practical advice to help me through. You delivered wonderfully. You didn't even know it but the post you put out then (may seem distant to you now) but has so much comfort here for me in 2021. God Bless you. This forum is the best thing I've found since I got diagnosed. Peace to all, KITI ... View more

Just do what feels right for you. If you feel angry, that's fine. You probably have every reason to be angry. You don't have to win a brave cancer patient of the year. On the forums we all pretend to be doing great. It makes us feel better. I think you sound like a great mum, you sound funny, you have had loads to deal with already in life and didn't need this extra shit.  I bet you thought about your son when you were first diagnosed. I couldn't look at my 5 year old daughter without crying the first few days.  Now that they can make it better, even if they have messed up your lymph nodes, you can feel angry and sad and everything you need to feel, maybe because of the relief as well. Stop judging yourself, you are doing great. Give yourself as much time as you can to deal with your feelings.  Will you need chemotherapy? I find it hard to trust doctors usually but with this disease in find I have no choice. I would be dead soon without them. It was strange at first because not in my nature, i google and question everything.  Big hug.  ... View more

Hello Helen I am due for masectomy in a few weeks but a close friend of mine had masectomy and reconstruction with implant in 2008. She always felt uncomfortable, that she had lost full movement, that the implants weren't really part of her body. She had it out and went flat a few years ago and now feels much better, even though it was hard psychologically, she preferred to feel well in her body.  Don't know if this is helpful, just so you know other women do struggle for years after reconstruction.  Hugs   ... View more

Hello CeliaRose I am going to have a mastectomy end of Febuary, after I finish chemotherapy.  I am 43 years old. My first reaction when I was diagnosed late summer was chop it off!!!! I want to see my kids grow up. 7 cm tumour, her 2 positive, hormone positive. Massive shock.  Immediate breast reconstruction isn't an option for me. Not due to Covid, due to being HER 2 positive and best survival chances.  I have to admit now the tumour has been reduced and my breast looks normal again I am starting to feel upset at the idea of amputation . I had felt pretty indifferent up until now. I don't think i'm ready yet to look at photos of breastless ladies. I don't know how I will react after surgery, usually I am very strong and positive, I have always been quite attractive (I think anyway ha ha-not that I make a great effort sInce I had my kids). But I think I am going to find it hard.  I think we need to allow ourselves to feel upset, angry, depressed, whatever emotions come. Its annoying when friends say things like :as long as you get rid of the tumour that is the most important. I know that!!! It was my immediate reaction. But I don't need to win any prizes for being brave or putting an act on. I'm not sure we can prepare for how we will feel. Just listen to our own feelings and be honest with ourselves. It's a pretty horrible thing to have to go through, despite everyone coping differently.  My hospital offers a psychologist to talk about it, I definitely take any offer of support there is.       ... View more