Breast Cancer Now Forum

Ahh bless you ….. tricky times but try to focus on facts rather than letting your mind run away with.  Wishing you all the very best! ... View more

Thank you @landgirl  I’ve worked really hard on myself to stay grounded - the cancer diagnosis has already stolen enough things from me and now it’s time for it not to steal more!   I often think of my brain as being playdo or putty ……. The negativity tries to take over so I have to get the other part of the putty to push it back down so there’s more room for positive thoughts. The best of luck to you. ... View more

@landgirl Hello - I’ve not read all the posts yet but yours caught my eye. The guilt is terrible isn’t it but it really isn’t our fault that we got ill.  I’m also a mum and felt so awful and guilty for inflicting my breast cancer diagnosis & treatment on everyone.  I want to be there for my kids and protect them not expose them to the fall out of a cancer diagnosis.  However, there’s not much we can do - it is how it is.  The main thing is making the most of each day, being thankful for small mercies & remaining positive (or meddling with our brains that we can be optimistic of no reoccurrence).     it all takes time…… time to digest, time to think over, time to get better, time to mend physically & mentally and time to just enjoy being once again. Wishing you all the very best in this journey. ... View more

Hello Liz very much the same for me but I‘m a little further ahead from you.  I finished my treatment a year ago.  It really takes time.  My experience was once treatment was finished, my family no longer needed to think about the cancer diagnosis but I was still recovering physically and mentally.  Am also taking tamoxifen.  I felt it remained by my side for some time …… it’s still a part of me but no longer so prominent.  It all takes time and should be given time.   I‘ve worked really hard on my mental approach as I don’t want to be a survivor, I want to return to embracing life and living it. Wishing you all the very best with your onward journey. X ... View more

@helen39  Can totally relate to that. i sometimes feel the same but try to think I‘ll finally make it to the lucky group of people who don’t get it again.  Two tumors were enough! Good luck everyone! ... View more

@adoptedmanc @EttaMagath  me again! You made a great point that people tend to talk about the negatives not the positives. Like you am I look at my diet (chocolate & alcohol can bring on flushes for me) exercise, yoga to zone out, fresh air, etc.   I still sometimes drink alcohol & still sometimes eat chocolate.  Life’s too short! Sometimes joints might get be bit painful/achey but I choose to ignore this & carry on. Wishing you both all the best.   ... View more

That’s lovely and so very true! ... View more

Hello Etta i‘m taking Tamoxifen and seem to tolerate it really well.  First few weeks I noticed a few side effects but really tried the mind over matter approach of not dwelling on them as I didn’t see much choice as will do everything to keep those pesky cancer cells st bay. I‘ve been taking it for a year (wow, one year already!).   everyone reacts so differently.  I hope you‘ll be as lucky as me! ... View more

@Guest user lovely to hear about your crafts and poetry.  Yes, indeed every cloud does have a silver lining. Keep enjoying your crafting!  When is the craft fair? ... View more

Uplifting Jan.  Resilience is a good word! ... View more

@Guest user  Poppy I totally agree - you have to learn to love the person you have become.  So true.  Keep at it…….I think with time you will hopefully learn to love the face you are looking at in the mirror.  Maybe also try some yoga mantras…….it’s all a bit who hoo hooey but sometimes reminding ourselves we are strong or we love ourselves, etc really helps. ... View more

@Bellis Coldwine  oh yes, I can see how it seems like one never ending thing.  It’s unfortunate that the timing was so.  At some point, we will all start living more normally again.  I like to put a positive spin on negative things but the pandemic and cancer are two things where I struggle to do so.  I therefore try to put the cancer thing to one side and not let it be the controller of my mind.  For a long time, it stayed next to me and was always present but now I feel I‘m able to have it behind my back and it follows me rather than accompanies me.  Not sure if this makes sense or is of any help but the mind is such an incredible powerful thing and if we can manipulate it, it can be an enormous help. big hugs ... View more

@Guest user  what are you crafting Poppy?  My sister sometimes does craft fares - such a great idea if I you are crafty!  I love doing a bit of craft stuff but sadly have limited talent 🙂 Really interested in your poetry.  Have you published before?   Eglis ... View more

@Guest user , @Bellis Coldwine , @Susanmanchester , @delly  Hello all Your messages touched a cord with me.  Totally understand all the comments.  At my last check up and first check since the ending of my treatment, I felt I relived part of that beginning journey....the anxiety of cancer returning when I didn't feel mentally ready to cope with it again.  Thankfully all was good.  I'm sure, however calm I think and try to be, my next appointment (looming) will make the same anxieties/worries resurface.  I do sometimes wonder why......why were we so unlucky..... but something keeps me going on.  I had a long 'numb' period which sounds pretty much where you are both at Poppy and susanmanchester.  It takes time.  I try to focus on doing something nice for myself or making sure I am doing things that I enjoy.   Ultimately I have taken the approach, the only person who can help me is myself and if I make myself feel good, whether it be reading an engrossing story, watching a film,doing something that makes me laugh, doing yoga or sport or walking and enjoying the nature, then I make something inside me much stronger and this helps to keep carrying me along.  There are many wonderful things around us but sometimes we get a bit lost in ourselves and find it hard to see these wonders.   I am trying hard to convince myself that the six monthly checks are a positive thing because they ensure cancer is kept away and ensure I stay healthy and therefore I should welcome them rather than fear them.  Let's see how much I have managed to convince/brainwash myself when I have my next check.  big hugs to all....... it's good to share - Poppy you said you are unable to with friends and family.....use your. Breastcancernow family instead to share - we are here for you as you are also here for us! Eglis ... View more

@eeyore58 @Evie-S  Try to keep your feet on the ground and take one step at a time.  It’s not easy but there’s lots of listening ears on this forum and @Evie-S @gives really good advice. I‘m not sure what else to say…… it’s a horrid process to have to go through.   Sending you loads of good wishes, positive vibes and energy.  Try to focus on facts and not what ifs.  Keep talking - it helps!   ... View more

@eeyore58 Thinking of you and hope all went as well as it can today. ... View more

Oh so sorry to hear that.  The initial shock is huge and I personally found the time waiting to know exactly what I had very hard…… yes it does totally consume you.  I can only suggest trying to focus on factual information and trying to stop your mind zooming ahead.  I always had my worst case scenario and best case and that kind of helped me. Practise anything that helps to settle your mind ….. Netflix, reading, yoga, walking, etc.  Feeling overwhelmed is, I think, totally normal.  Share your anxieties/worries or write them down….. maybe this helps them from going round and round in your head. wishing you absolutely all the very best…… fingers crossed for best case scenario!  Will be thinking of you on13th…….. positive vibes coming your way! ... View more

a lovely Thread! ... View more

@tappin   Big hugs and positive vibes being sent in your direction too. Whilst it’s shocking the number of people impacted by breast cancer, I like to think the research and advancement in detection and treatment probably makes it seem much more common.   I hate the fact that I had breast cancer and the impact on my and my family‘s life BUT am so very grateful for mammograms, MRI and amazing surgeons and those researchers! Take care of yourself! ... View more

@Be   Totally understand how you are feeling - it’s an odd thing and yes, life changes rapidly.  Not something we want to go through or inflict on anyone else.   Take each step as it comes and try to focus on factual info rather than what ifs. Big hugs and positive vibes coming your way  ... View more