Just do what feels right for you. If you feel angry, that's fine. You probably have every reason to be angry. You don't have to win a brave cancer patient of the year. On the forums we all pretend to be doing great. It makes us feel better. I think you sound like a great mum, you sound funny, you have had loads to deal with already in life and didn't need this extra shit. I bet you thought about your son when you were first diagnosed. I couldn't look at my 5 year old daughter without crying the first few days. Now that they can make it better, even if they have messed up your lymph nodes, you can feel angry and sad and everything you need to feel, maybe because of the relief as well. Stop judging yourself, you are doing great. Give yourself as much time as you can to deal with your feelings. Will you need chemotherapy? I find it hard to trust doctors usually but with this disease in find I have no choice. I would be dead soon without them. It was strange at first because not in my nature, i google and question everything. Big hug.
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