Breast Cancer Now Forum

Thanks Evie for this, it's really helpful xx ... View more

Thanks Evie, I've made a complaint to them so will see how that goes. I had planned a week's cycling holiday with friends but unfortunately they have to go without me due to my rt so Travelodge response is insult to injury. Though i don't feel so annoyed this morning as need to focus my energy on looking after myself. I just won't use them again and certainly won't be recommending them either!! xx ... View more

Hi bee1234, i decided to only tell need to know and close friends. For me it was the thought of dealing with people's reactions that decided that. I also told those that knew how i needed them to react towards me i.e i didn't want tears, sympathy or shock horror reactions. It can get exhausting managing other people even though they mean well. Some people I didn't tell till after my op but at the end of the day it really is your decision to tell who you want, when u want and how much information and for you to feel comfortable doing that in the way that is right for you. xx ... View more

Hi Bee1234, that was me almost 8 weeks ago so completely understand where you are currently as do most of the ladies on here. Out of all the unpleasantness of our situations, there is some comfort in that none of us are totally alone in this as many of us are going through this either at same time or some ahead of us to offer help, advice, an ear and just to keep each other going to get through it all. Many have described it as a roller-coaster ride which I'm inclined to agree with though a few times I've felt like I'm on the full spin cycle of my washing machine... & have probably looked like it too!!  I've found the forum really helpful as I've read so many other stories and lots of positivity as well plus that others totally understand the roller-coaster ride xx ... View more

Hi ladies, sorry to hear your op has been delayed Tricks. I can imagine how excruciating that feeling must be as we rely so much on focusing these dates and then ticking them off. Hope you manage to find a way to stay positive. Lemonsqueezy, also really hard waiting for results. I thought i was fine till the morning of my results arrived and then i didn't get a call from consultant. An hour later i still hadn't and as it was a Friday i thought if I didn't get them that day i wouldn't be able to wait till the Monday. It was at this point i could feel myself unravelling a bit. One minute Im feeling strong then realise how easy it is to get knocked sideways. I left a very tearful message on their answer phone then with no response i jumped in car to drive to hosp. Luckily they could see me and i got the results i wanted. Mine were only over due a few hours and just that small wait really tested my resolve so i know both your waits will require a lot of strength and positivity. So I'm sending you both some virtual hugs, some strength and positivity. Stay strong xxx ... View more

Hi Louby Loo, I've just re read the posts and realised you've already experienced general previously so i was getting the messages mixed up. You've also said it was like an amazing sleep too. Well hopefully if anyone else is reading my message prior to their first surgery this might help them. I know i scoured the website for someone who had gone through it before me so hopefully this will be some comfort to others in the same position xx ... View more

Hi Louby Lou, hope you didn't mind me joining in the convo as i see you have your lumpectomy on 10th Aug so just wanted to say re my experience as well if it helps. It was very positive one too. I've had a dentist phobia for years due to my fear of local - takes ages to numb me then they seem to give me too much so half my face feels numbs for the day and i felt I was a bit of an inconvenience for dentists and my reactions to local. So the thought of general was one of my worst fears. I spoke to my consultant, nurse, anaesthetists and probably anyone who would listen lol to my fears. They were very reassuring. I also looked up positive experiences on here and anywhere i could find positives about it. At times i honestly didn't think i would be able to do it without having a total panic and wondered how an earth am I going to do this. But I did it and in hindsight it was no way as scary as i thought. Like Lemonsqueezy said, I'd have one no problem now. You are so well cared for by the team. My memories are my legs feeling a bit tingly then i took a few breaths through the mask they gave me and next thing i was being wheeled out. I didn't believe they had even started but it was all over. I was up out of my bed walking (well staggering like I'd had a few too many wines!) to the loo within 20 mins and Like many others I've not had to take any pain killers. Obviously everyone recovers differently and there is no right or wrong but it was not the scary experience i thought it would be. For me i felt like I'd had a fantastic sleep and whatever is in the anaesthetic made me very feel good indeed. I hate taking any drugs, paracetamol is my limit and i did worry i might feel a bit loopy with the anaesthetic (my fear of being out of control) but i can now actually see how people can get addicted to feel good drugs!! I didn't feel loopy, well not that i was aware of anyway!! So from my experience and from what I've read from others when it comes down to it, it's actually far from scary. The worst bit is worrying and wondering beforehand as it's an unknown if it's your first general like mine was but the reality was far far less scary than i imagined. Hope that helps in some way. You've got this xx ... View more

Hi Lemonsqueezy, Tricks and Ladies, hope you are all well. Hope you got the results you wanted Lemonsqueezy. Hope you're recovering well Tricks. I've had quite a few strange down days after my results but better as week has gone on. Whilst of course I am extremely relieved with my results you still have some adjusting to do, to the whole thing. But I've not even started my radiotherapy yet or hormone tabs but will deal with that as it comes. Overall though I'm doing really well, thinking about things I want to change generally going fwds and seeing this as a great reminder to me to do all the things in life I've put on hold. I'm glad it's given me a different perspective, not in the way i would have chosen of course but in many ways this experience is forcing me to get my priorities in life right.  Love and hugs to everyone whatever stage of the journey you are on xx ... View more

Hi Ladies, hope everyone is doing ok. I wanted to share some good news. I had my pathology results today from my lumpectomy on 9th July. Clear margins, tumour was 12mm and no node involvement (snb). It's been a very emotional day from getting quite anxious waiting to find out and them getting the good news. I cried with the anxiety and then cried again with the relief.  Thought i might have a little celebration but instead fell asleep for a few hours when i got home. When i woke up I felt like what the heck just happened these last 8 weeks!! It felt like I'd woken up from a weird dream and that I'd imagined it all!!  In a strange way I'm actually glad of my scar (again I'm fortunate it is small, healing well and my boob luckily doesn't look much different than before) to remind me this really has all happened but that i have come out the other side.  Although i feel very fortunate with my results and thankful for screening you can't under estimate the toll it does take having to go through all this even with such good news at the end of it. Still have to have radiotherapy and hormonal tablets but I'm not hugely concerned at moment, just grateful for today's results. I know everyone has a different journey but i really hope you too will come out the other side soon enough and have your own good news. Take care everyone  Catherine xxx  ... View more

Also just an update ladies on my progress so far. As you know op went extremely well. Feels like it was all dream now a week since has almost past. Apart from tiredness throughout the week, I've had no pain, bit sore though nothing major but everything healing really well. My emotions are seeping out though. I was on focus focus mode before the op as that's all i could think of. Now I've become more emotional over this whirlwind i find myself in but particularly emotional (in a good way) about the care I've received and all the amazing people involved in my care. Doing lots of nice things this week and treated myself to a pedicure today. Next week my little roller coaster car will be cranking up the slopes again as i wait for my pathology results on the 23rd. I've never liked actual roller-coasters but after this roller coaster ride I'd probably find the real thing easy in comparison! Hope you are all doing ok xx ... View more

Hi Tricks, wanted to wish you all the very best for your op tomorrow. If its anything like mine you will blink then you'll be in recovery. Will be thinking of you but you will be in the best of hands and will be a giant step closer to getting this sorted xx ... View more

Lemonsqueezy and ladies, I've done it!! Op over and done with. From someone who has had huge general anxieties in the past, never ever thought I'd ever manage a general anaesthetic without having an utter meltdown.... Well take it from me, you can do it. It was so undramatic and easy in the end though I did cry when i got onto operating table, not for long though as next thing i was in recovery not quite believing they had finished!! I felt like I'd had such a great sleep. I could never have imagined it would be really be quite so straightforward with what was going on in head. So for any other ladies worried about this, if i can do this you can too and without out being the terror experience you think it might be, quite the opposite in fact. You will be so well looked after. Not had any discomfort or pain as yet. Hope this helps anyone about to go through the same xx 💪 💪 ☺️ ... View more

Morning ladies, day of op has arrived. Feeling OK so far. Had my wire insertion, very easy and straightforward so no issues there. Just waiting for the radioactive injection. Will keep u all up dated. All quite calm here at moment xx ... View more

Hi lemonsqueezy, I wouldn't call myself brave at all lol. Like you i have been bricking it. I decided that as i couldn't change the fact i had to have the op (never had one b4) then i would try to change my mindset so I've spent the last few weeks repeatedly going over positive mantras, researching all the positives and just totally immersing myself in this to stifle my anxieties. I'm amazed I've got this far without having a melt down over it but somehow it's worked. Having said that how well it will all work when I'm faced with everything on Friday, I don't know!! Just clicked on the link to your blog. Love the way you write and It felt like I was pretty much reading my own road to diagnosis. Also I've never felt why me either as i felt it was as likely to be me as anyone else. The most overwhelming bit for me so far was at the beginning of of diagnosis and thinking i just don't want to have to go through all this -the stress of appointments, op, treatment and so on. I've had to cx various activities planned throughout the summer so i can spend my time sorting this out, no doubt this will be much the same for us all. The upside of course is, there are treatments, ops and people who can help us get it treated. If I get through my op etc without a melt down I'm changing my name from zippy to Rocky 🥊 🤣 💪 xx ... View more

Hi ladies, i had a call from hospital today to say I haven't done my covid test and if I don't the op will be delayed. I've never moved so fast in my life!! The thought of a delay would definitely send me into a melt down but all done now. Phew!! There has been a bit of confusion over dates and admin in my situation so I completely missed it. On the positive the chit chat with nurse doing my covid test and visiting the hospital again (my op is in a hosp mostly for private patients but is used as an over flow for NHS patients for breast surgery and so its a very nice hospital too) added to my current calmness. Tricks, I'm feeling more like Rocky 🥊 😂 😂 now and raring to go and fingers crossed 🤞 that feeling will at least get me onto the operating table and then I'll let the experts take care of me. 2 days to go. Will report back as soon as i can xx  ... View more

Hi Doodlebug, sorry u find urself on here. However coming on here i've found it really has been a lifetime not feeling I'm going through it alone. I did go to my appointments on my own but with a friend waiting outside for me but I found the team there were really supportive. I guess they are used to this on a daily basis so should be there to give you any support you need if you're having to go on your own. As for questions... I tend to want to know every little detail but of course everyone is different and will want to know different things at different times.  I think i like to know everything as it stops my mind imagining all sorts of things. And depends what you want to know. I read on one thread that one woman didn't want to know anything other than the treatment so that obviously worked for her. So I started my questions with - what do i want to know right now as you may not want to know everything in one go as can be too much to take in especially if on your own when going to appointments. As I've gone along a question has popped into my head late at night so I've then emailed my nurse. So maybe don't feel under pressure to ask all your questions in one go and don't worry if you forget things as you should be able to ask later if you think of something else.  For me, as i was told it was small, grade 1 and caught early I found it easy to ask questions with that in mind without scaring myself too much. I also asked what the likely treatment would be though I've not met with an oncologist as yet just my nurse and consultant so someone who has met with their oncologist may be able to help you with that part. Most on here say it gets a lot easiest once you have all your results and you have a treatment plan in place. I'm sure others will be along soon to give you their thoughts too. Take care xx ... View more

Hi Trick, that's great that the recon you want is back on. Like you say, we all have to decide what is right for us, that really is so important. In our lives pre BC that's exactly what we would ordinarily do anyway. I think being able to have options, choice and some control over these things in a situation where there is a lot out of our control is really important in so many ways. So is your op 9th or 16th? If 9th will be same day as me. xx ... View more

Hi Tizzy, that's great news that it went well for you and you are now recovering. I i did think of you on Friday hoping it would all go well. I'm up next, this coming Friday, though i actually feel less anxious about it this week generally plus hearing you've come through it as well as can be really helps too so thank you for sharing that.  I hope to come back after my op next week with a similar experience to report. We are very fortunate given the circumstances that we all have each other to share our experiences with. Best of luck to you Tizzy with your journey, onwards and upwards xxx ... View more

Hi Trick, will be thinking of you today for your appointment and sending you hugs xx ... View more