Breast Cancer Now Forum

During rads I had a bath sitting up with warm water and usual bubble bath. I made sure none of my radiated areas got wet, then I showered boob and shoulder area with luke warm water. A couple of weeks after rads resumed my normal bath. I had hardly any pinkness during or after rads and was fine. I decided that I had had so much to put up with I wasn't being deprived even if it was sitting in a less deep bath than normal. ... View more

Hi I was diagnosed with invasive ductal bc,lobular bc and tubular bc in November 2009. I also had a large area of Ductal carcinoma all cancers were in the right breast. At 47 I hadn't had a mammogram. My only symptom had been indentation of a vein. It did come as a shock although once they started doing lots of tests I just knew something had been found. The breast team have always explained carefully the situation, what they are going to do and have treated me with respect. Once they have all the results they will be able to tell you what treatment you need. Take each day as it comes feelings will go up and down. If you are feeling upset allow yourself to be upset. If you are up to it plan a few treats for yourself. Be prepared for varying reactions and help from unexpected sources. For a hospital stay front opening pj's are good also felt better with nice toiletries etc and magazines rather than books. 21 months on I am mainly positive, have managed to work between treatments and I am a much more thoughtful person. Have had a mastectomy reduction on the other side,reconstructions, radiotherapy and Tamoxifen etc all doable and i'm not a brave person at all. It is a real benefit to have supportive people around you. This website is vey helpful and has all sorts of threads. ... View more

I think I am slower and not so good at multi tasking. I am more thoughtful and appreciative of my family, friends and life in general. Cant eat as much as I could without putting on weight and have to watch my necklines. Am about to start another phased return to work after more surgery. Don't worry so much about work. I have started to think about things I enjoy and actually do them. I have become a bit bolder and more assertive. Would like the pace of the old me back but am happy with the rest even though chest is still work in progress. Would never have preferred having cancer but it did force me to get off the hamster wheel and re evaluate. ... View more

Hi for quite a few months before I was diagnosed in 2009 I felt really tired and fatigued as if my body was telling me something was wrong. Take as much rest as you need rest before the op will benefit you after. Try and eat if your appetite has gone soup with veg from the cook chill cabinet is good. You will get lots of support and tips on here. ... View more

My husband also said that cancer was taking over. Trying to talk about the what if's was being negative when actually I am being realistic. Cancer and the aftermath is there it is bound to be but taking a back seat. When I was diagnosed he said well life carries on and his did more or less. He looked after me practically very well and attended main appointments. I think looking back he was burying his head in the sand if everything is 'normal' everything will be ok. For a long time he was quite emotionally detached and spent over a year building a car. This was at my suggestion because he was so stressed. He kept saying that he was glad I was better. Still got a couple of ops to go,still on tamoxifen and still very fatigued. He would like me back to my old self. It is only now and I was diagnosed November 2009 that he is beginning to talk about how he really feels. I am sure because he did not deal with it at the time he is mega stressed about lots of things. For me though although I would turn the clock back tomorrow cancer has made me into a much stronger person so although he has been difficult I have dealt with the situation well and am appreciating life. I have pointed out that we need to work together as a couple if are to move forward as a couple. He is taking this on board.I am sorry that he is feeling the stress but hopefully we can work it out. ... View more

Thinking of you all today. Share how you are feeling your children will be feeling the same. Today will seem very long but hopefully you will see her later. There are usually people on the forum whenever you log on so you never need feel alone. ... View more

Went for some saline for expander implant on Friday.Nurse asked consultant to take a look. They both decided that breast on the other side would need uplifting for symmetry. The breast has already been reduced and uplifted once after I had the mx. So next year it looks like I will be having the implant changed for a permanent one and the other breast uplifted. Am not looking forward to being sore both sides. Has anyone else had this done, what is the recovery time like? ... View more

HI for me it's five weeks yesterday. Can wear a bra most of the time but feel a bit sore by evening. Arm not up to full strength but improving. Have just about stopped taing painkillers and am down to three pillows. Am feeling a bit more tired but have been doing more around the house. Must pace myself more as being overtired is not good. I think as women we do as much as we can which is sometimes too much. We have had a major op and the body needs time to heal. Hope you are getting on ok and things are improving. ... View more

Practically you and your sons are helping your wife in every way possible.I should think you are finding it tough particularly if you are working as well.I have just shared your post with my husband and he thinks that you are doing everything possible.From the point of view of the one with cancer I would say be alongside her, talk with her about how you both are feeling. Give lots of hugs and reassurance that you will always be there for her. When she feels up to it go out together even if it is just to the garden centre or cafe. A small treat like a little bunch of flowers always made me feel a bit better. It can feel very lonely to be the one with cancer and scarey as you can't escape it. Side effects are distessing and fatigue is awful. All sorts of things will be going through her mind. Keep communicating with each other and ask her how specifically you can support. ... View more

Don't worry about what people think etc. If your dad wants you to go I would go it will help him in a positive way. I would feel upset if any of my children cancelled something especially if they had had a tough time. My eldest son and his girlfriend wen't away just after one of my ops and I just looked forward to hearing their experiences on return. You can see your dad just before you go and as soon as you come back. He will need more help when he comes out and you will have recharged your batteries and be able to help him even better. ... View more

Do whatever feels comfortable for you. I carried on at work although not very productively till the day before my ops.I went mainly because I needed some sense of normality and because my collegues were supportive. Do not worry about what will happen while you are away you need to concentrate on you. Take up any offers of help and support that will lighten the load. When I was diagnosed I felt that I needed to be strong for everyone else and found myself comforting others. I think that if I had cried alot at that stage I would have never stopped and dealing with the practicalities just got me through. I would recommend taking plenty of time off after to recover.21 months after diagnosis I am still on the journey and after feeling quite stuck recently am adjusting to a new normal. As far as the op goes you will be well looked after and be kept comfortable. These days they explain things beforehand which I found reassuring. ... View more

Had 25 rads to breast area and 4 to pelvis to zap ovaries. Was off from work whilst having rads although some people carry on was fine for the first three weeks so did all the usual pottering about.Week four and five got more tired. This tiredness seemed to turn to fatigue and got worse for a while after rads stopped and I returned to work. I had a sit down at some point in the day when I was tired but mostly carried on as normal apart from not being at work. With hindsight I would have had a few more weeks off after rads had finished. Actually having the rads was fine. ... View more

Had 25 rads to breast area and 4 to pelvis to zap ovaries. Was off from work whilst having rads although some people carry on was fine for the first three weeks so did all the usual pottering about.Week four and five got more tired. This tiredness seemed to turn to fatigue and got worse for a while after rads stopped and I returned to work. I had a sit down at some point in the day when I was tired but mostly carried on as normal apart from not being at work. With hindsight I would have had a few more weeks off after rads had finished. Actually having the rads was fine. ... View more

Found the MRI ok the worse bit was the noise I thought it sounded a bit like a washing machine. Scan people lovely. Tried to think pleasant thoughts. This worked most of the time. ... View more

Definitely button up pj tops also have a range of short sleeve floral tops in cotton jersey. The mx will still take a bit of recovery time I know it's difficult with children but if you take it easy to start with you will feel better in the long run. ... View more

I am in the process having had three ops so far mastectomy and implant(implant didn't work out due to unexpected rads),reduction to other side then LD flap plus another expander implant operation four weeks ago. Another two ops next year plus nipple tatooing. I still have four more years of tamoxifen. I hate the waiting and having time off etc. I am thinking at the moment that the old normal has gone and that I am in the process of adjusting and making the new normal. What I am finding hard to get my head round is the uncertainty that they might do all this and the cancer could come back anyway( it was stage 3).If it came back I woould have wasted so much time on the reconstruction when I could be doing other things. I think though when I have made some adjustments to my thinking I will be much happier. ... View more

Thankyou Jo I have sent off for my copy and thankyou D007 the article is really good.I was feeling really stuck but am beginning to see that to move on a new normal will need to be created and I will have to accept this. It's strange but to me the mastectomy had much less of an impact than the uncertainty and fatigue. I would be really greatful for any advice of how others created a new normal I know it can't be done overnight.I have already started to break it down into catagories work,home and me. Feeling much more positive now I am addressing the issue. ... View more

I was given the choice whether to have my ovaries surgically removed or extinguished by radiotherapy. I had four sessions of radio to finish them off as I was on my third op related to the bc and didnt want another anaesthetic. Am on tamoxifen so have some symptoms hot flushes and slight weight gain but they are manageable. It's great not having periods or needing contreception. I haven't been offered any alternative to HRT. I am 49 but was 47 when diagnosed so would have been heading for the menopause anyway. The only thing is that I have more anxiety than I used to but I am not sure whether that is bc related menopause related or just me. ... View more

You are definitely right about the new normal. I need to work on accepting the new normal I will be much happier then. I like the idea of putting the cancer and treatments in a box. Think they are a bit too high profile in my mind at the moment. Some of my friends are great others are of the "You look so well but I have a sore knee/back etc brigade. I don't think they are unkind but just don't understand. It is good to come on the forum where there are people who do. I am investigating some free councelling sessions which are done through being employed. Your boss doesnt have to know. There is also a scheme in my area which is called Fit to work. It gives you advice on all sorts of things as well as work. ... View more