StillIrise - firstly can I say how inspirational I found the first part of your post? I was dx with Stage 3 and nearly 100% positive nodes. I was delighted to read that you had a similar dx but 10 years on your are doing well - certainly helps me to stay positive about the future.
As for your friends with secondaries - I cannot understand why they wouldn't understand your need to put yourself and family first at a time like this. If I was in a similar situation I would be questioning the friendship as true friends don't behave like that.
YOU are the important person in all of this. If you don't look after yourself first then you won't be able to look after anyone else.
Hope everything sorts itself out xx
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