Breast Cancer Now Forum

Another one with reason for gratitude for Val's kind postings at various stages along the way. My deep sympathy to her family. ... View more

Hallo cs1, Sorry that it has turned out like this, but better knowing than not. It is strange how it is better when you start to know a bit more, and it doesn't surprise me either that you like your consultant more after this hurdle. Wishing you all the best results with your next lot of tests, and a swift move on to chemo. Chemo before surgery has two advantages that I have learned from this forum-it can shrink down the lesion so that lesser surgery can deal with it, and you know that it is working as you can see it!   Lavender xx     ... View more

Dear cs, I really don't know the answer to this. All my treatment has been NHS, from diagnosis by screening through surgery and chemo. I have had a lot of waiting around, but feel the choice of treatment would have been the same either way. The consultant performed my surgery as the lung people said it had to be as short an anaesthetic as possible- a rare advantage of grotty lungs! I have seen the consultant quite often in review, in fact more times than not, more than I do in the lung department. Being seen privately means less waiting, perhaps more time to discuss things, and the guarantee that the surgery is done by the designated person. I think one loss is that you may not have a Breast Care Nurse which I would really miss. Does it give you access to more drugs? More views please. Should this be in a separate thread with Private v NHs in the title? Is there such a thread in the archives? Best of luck, I can see your husband is trying to cherish you the best he can, which is lovely.   Lavender xx ... View more

Dear CS, It really is almost tougher doing the first bit than later things, perhaps because we are in shock so much, but also because we haven't learned how many people there  are around to help us. I was shocked too at how sure the consultant was,  got very cross on my own, thinking "How can she say that when she hasn't got the histology". But in the end the baptism of fire helped me. I do remember being quite solitary for a lot of my waiting  week, my OH is not chatty but he probably found that the quietest week ever from me. Really hard for your husband that he lost his mum to BC,  but things have moved on, and diagnosis and treatment are improving year on year. He might benefit from time with  the Breast Cancer nurses too. Our sons are much older so I felt I had to tell them I had had tests that might be cancer, even though the consultant had said definitely that it would be cancer. They were great, really supportive with extra phone calls, finding me nice things to do for the good days of chemo etc. 12 is a bit young to deal with might be scenarios, and you will know more when you go back of what they are planning for you, which makes it easier perhaps  for a child to cope with.  I wonder what other mothers think? Yes, we plan our last days then go and be seen and discover what can be done. We have to look at statistics to make decisions but after that we are not statistics, we are individuals. And more of us survive than not!   Distraction is the name of the game for the waiting week, I remember going to Pub Quizzes and things, lots of puzzles and gardening. Itreally was easier from then on, the BCNs were brilliant and you become very busy learning a whole new world and its language. And this place is the best for information, use the information side, the helpline, your own BCNs, and the forum. Don't Google you are liable to find out of date info. Best of luck! ... View more

Fabulous news,  Philibotte!  Celebrate and sing!   I am glad you didn't have to wait any longer, the strain is awful. It is funny how we worry about one thing  then  along comes another sneaky disorder getting under the radar.   I am OK, she says with British caution,  was diagnosed with Triple Negative Grade 3 Intraductal Cancer found on routine screening in 2010, so have passed my 3 year anniversary, after mastectomy and chemo. I have bigger problems from a lung disorder, but a change to treatment for that this summer seems to be going well. I come into the boards here less now, but need to see how some old friends are doing. And while I'm here tend to respond to anyone on the Waiters and Watchers bench, as I  am so grateful to the people who cheered me along.   Hope it all goes well for you now, keep up with the screening.   Lavender xx     ... View more

Oh, dear, Philibotte, you are still on tenterhooks. Whatever they are. I don't think that the fact the biopsy result isn't back yet is bad news, sometimes they have more work to do, perhaps some of the staff are off sick? My first biopsy result was back in a week, the second pathology result post operatively was available after 14 days.   Although it sounds easy for him to say, your internist is right to say that it is not the end of the world to have a cancer diagnosis. We have all been brought up to believe that but it truly isn't so.   Five steps ahead? A lot of us have been there, picking out our funeral hymns! Especially if it is a cancer diagnosis, we need to slow down and take things one step at a time, as it is easier to deal with in our minds (and that has a kick back effect on our bodies as well as we stress out). Try not to borrow trouble from tomorrow. I spent this time at the bottom of the garden digging and pulling out weeds- it was very useful, as I wasn't able to do so much post op! Can't remember what I thought I would do if the answer was all clear-that didn't happen for me. For you it still might and you can choose things like  having that vacation you always promised yourself, giving up smoking, or eating the "wrong" things, or just going round telling everyone that you love them. I worked out that I would do what I had to do to get through it all, And hope that that worked. And that I would make the most of the little things that make me happy, like birds and butterflies and flowers, and the people that I love. And if that didn't work, well, I would have tried. Sounds easy,  of course it wasn't, but working through it was better than not doing anything and going crazy.   As you said internist does that mean that you are in the USA? That makes it harder for me to say where else to look for help- in the UK we have often volunteer run Cancer Centres attached to some hospitals where you can go for advice on relaxation and calming breathing-these things really do help.   In the mean time, carry on posting!   Lavender xx         ... View more

Dear Philibotte, That is hard for you, I remember hyperventilating on the way to the first breast appointment so much I have made a point of going on public transport since if I can't get a lift. It also helps to have someone else at an appointment as one's mind goes blank sometimes after their first few words.   Like all sorts of things human, there is a range of findings  from definitely benign to definitely cancer, and this applies to the US findings. I would suggest trying to phone the Helpline to ask about that. They can cope with very anxious people who feel stupid! I have tested them! Have added a link below but the humans on the Helpline would be better.   They have to look at the biopsy specimen as that is the best way to identify whether the cells are normal or not. Also they test to see if hormone therapy or Herceptin would be useful if it is cancer.   When are you due to get your results?  You are still in with a chance of "You don't need to come back, you are fine" and I hope that's what you are told.   Lavender xx       ... View more

Hallo, Scared and anxiety ridden, You are totally normal to be feeling like this, everyone does, both the ones who get an all clear in a week or two and those who stay just a little bit longer. The important thing is to get checked and find out the facts as they apply to you. If your doctor was cold, that's not very nice, but honestly its better than them being so kind that you feel you can't be long for this world! The good thing is he said it could be either way and not highly suspicious. My radiologist said this looks highly suspicious from minute one and after 5-10 minutes further looking, plus biopsy, she told me that the diagnosis was almost certainly cancer. They don't mess about, they tell you what they expect, so it sounds as if you have a good chance of waving goodbye to the clinic soon. Meanwhile keep busy, DO NOT GOOGLE look for info from your BreastCare Nurse or this site, and hang around, you will find lots of good company here. Lavender xx   ... View more

A quick post to say well done to everyone campaigning on this thread before the next phase of the boards makes it too difficult to communicate. Lavender xx ... View more

Thinking of you, Wacky. You were a great son to your Mum and you can be proud of that. Lavender xx ... View more

I was told by the BCNs to make an appointment for trying out different prostheses when my scar had settled after surgery and seroma, I didn't have rads so guess you have to factor that in too, but overall it all seemed to be their province, so ask them nicely and you may find they say, just come along and see us. If no joy, do ask via the Helpline. lavender xx ... View more

Fresia67, look at the website of Amoena, as they do the widest rangeof prostheses i have come across, including for boosting where there has been WLE and radiotherapy. My surgeon was not involved in any of the decisions re prosthesis, do you have a breast cancer nurse who can help you with this? Or ring the Helpline? This really does not seem right, it is very demoralising being lopsided. Wishing you luck with this! ... View more

And ring your chemo nurses if you are worried about ANYTHING-my team were very hot on this. I felt very spaced after my first chemo and looking back I am sure it was all from hyperventilation! ... View more

Sing along to the tune of High Society (you are possibly too young to know it LOL) High high, high high, High Scanxiety! Laughing and singing helps a little bit to shrink the natural anxiety for me, not pretending that I have found scanxiety easy. This bit is tough, you're right, it is all packed in, it is honestly easier once you have done this lot and have started chemo You are doing well. Lavender Edited after posting in case I sounded too csual about scanxiety ... View more

Kaz, June is right, we probably both remember the awful feeling of "Have I gone through all this and it will come back? I didn't have rads but at the end of chemo was just so tired and dispirited, at the beginning you are getting lots of cheer from other people and you are Ha!well even though just diagnosed with cancer so you have enough energy to be positive minded about it all. Do you have any Cancer Support Centre near you? Usually it is charity funded but attached to a hospital, I was given a leaflet about ours on the day I was diagnosed. At the time I didn't think I hadthe time to make an appointment but eventually got round to it a year perhaps after completing chemo to learn some relaxation technique. I had Reiki from a lovely volunteer therapist then Reflexology-none of this is my sort of thing usually at all but I found it soothing and relaxing. Then I joined a choir with an inspirational teacher and now I am doing a Cancer Survivorship Programme, also very inspiring. Every where is different but I would say go and try, it may give you the uplift you need and the feeling of other people in the same boat and people who care. Keep going, sweetheart! Lavender xx ... View more

Kaz, It is scary when people talk about the increase in recurrence early on but we do get to balance it with less recurrence later on. A lot of women with Breast Cancer are Triple Negative, 15 to 20% which is a lot of women, and we don't all die of it. My surgeon did not like to talk about it as TN and said it was good I didn't need herceptin or hormone therapy, and also that he felt there were different types within TN to be discovered. Perhaps a bit of positive spin but I was fed up with the negative spin! After mastectomy and axillary clearance and FEC6 for Stage 1 Grade 3 I have just passed my 3 year anni with no recurrence and hope to carry on this way. Wave, Lulu, haven't seen you for a bit Lavender xx ... View more

Dear Lemongrove, I do hope that the apoointment on the 8th will get you back on the right lines for diagnosis and treatment. Srnding love and some of the positive feelings youhave radiatd my way in the past Lavenderlassie xxxx ... View more

It is strange how you go from total denial to "maybe" and then to "maybe and if it is I will cope". Still hoping for a "No, it's not" for you! Lavender xx ... View more

What a fabulous post, Tracy. My love and respect to all recon ladies, but especially Naz. Lavender xx ... View more

Dear Naz, I am so pleased to read this-I saw some of your earlier postings on the subject and know how hard it has been. I hope the only is way forward now! Lavender xx ... View more