Breast Cancer Now Forum

I do remember thae feeling but things will get better I hope my story helps I had a mastectomy in November then chemo and Rads 2 nodes  involved 35mm tumour also in skin and no clear anterior margin I was 48 and kids were 11 and 15   That was in 2004  I am now 61 and have 2 lovely grandsons I hope this shows that there can be a future and I wish you well   The constant worry will lesson as time goes on,  life will never be the same again but it will get better I hope the counselling helps ... View more

Hi Podry   I can't help with answers but thought I'd at least show you that you aren't alone   I was dx 13 years ago and had chemo and rads I like you also have Lymphoedema   I had a bad spell in 2013 with repeated chest infections/pneumonia during the period July to October and had a chest clinic appointment inJan 2014 where I was told it was just down to bad luck   Fast forward to June last year and off we go again I am just getting over what was my 9th infection since then one of which took 3 types of ABs to clear I had a ct scan in the June but my follow up regarding a nodule in the right lung(cancer side)wasn't done in the July but was picked up in October when I had an overnight stay at the hospital A further ct showed nodule ok but said I had inflammation of the airways   I have been on Ventolin inhaler and several courses of steroids due to the cough which i have had since August 2016 At one point in December I could barely speak because it   My Gp did a referral to the chest clinic in February but I've yet to receive an apointment  My chest feels tight and I'm completely run down as I don't get a chance to recover and have now had oral thrush twice too   So you have my sympathy and I hope your hospital is quicker with a referral than mine is     ... View more

Hi Happy Shopper I believe we have similar backgrounds re dx and Osteoporosis round about the same time I think the fear is always there to a degree and when something unusual happens you automatically mistrust your body I developed back pain earlier this year and whilst I didn't exactly have a meltdown my GP knew that I wanted the re assurance of a bone scan after the Xray was OK and he fully understood why   So you are not over reacting or wasting anyone's time and you did the right thing getting your symptoms checked out. I'm glad it seems ok and you should be able to relax again but please don't beat yourself up over your reaction.   Take care     ... View more

Hi Happyshopper I totally understand how you are feeling as I took IHR in October  2007 aged 51 due to LD. Like you I was dx in 2004 then dx in 2006 with LD and 2008with Osteoporosis) You are so right in saying that our work defines us and I too have struggled with feelings of loss of identity and usefulness.   There is no easty solution but it should get better in time. I have tried volunteering but it didn't work out for me so I hope it does for you. I meet up regularly with other retired colleagues and still see woking colleagues sometimes. I know that I am lucky not to be still working in my old office as the conditions there are not good and I am also aware that I still have an income which is not the case for others who have lost their jobs through cancer.   I stll have my "pity me" moments but not so often now.    I try to be thankful for the good stuff and make the most of the free time. My kids call me "a lady who lunches" and I am a regular in my local cafe where I can see people to chat to as I don't like to spend too much time at home on my own. So what I am trying to say is that what you are feeling is perfectly normal and I am sure you will adjust eventually.   I wish you all the best and hope you will come to enjoy life as a lady of leisure although there will still be moments of regret  which should lessen as time goes on. ... View more

"one girl says really nasty things like how are you going to get sales now with no tits." I could not believe what I was reading!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This suggests the comment was not an isolated one and if that is the case has anyone spoken to her already? If so then she hasn't listened and if not or even if it was an isolated comment I really feel that a word from your manager might be the appropriate action. I am glad that your manager is willing to speak to her as sadly this isn't always the case. If you don't want to go down that route and don't feel up to tackling her yourself would any of your colleagues be willing to "speak" to her? This is clearly a case of bullying and should be knocked on the head ASAP (not literally of course although that's what i imagied doing the girl when I read what she had said). I really hope you get some resolution to this. My recon left me much smaller but I was fortunate to have a lovely buch of colleagues who wouldn't have dreamed of making a comment like that and I only wish everyone could have the same ... View more

Hello Happyshopper I don't post very often therse days but just look in now and again. I was pleased to see you had got your retirement and believe we have a similar history re LE (only arm for me)and Osteoporosis. I was 48 at dx in 2004 and developed LE in 2006 in my dominant arm I ended up getting IHR in October 2007 at age 51 and you have just described exactly how i felt. So much of our identity is our job that being forced to give up too early is very unsettling. I remember I had some surgery in the Decmber of 2007 and it was really nice not having the pressure of wondering how soon I would feel like going back from sick leave but that didn't last. I do still get down and frustrated by feeling like I am not a useful member of society but that doesn't happen so often therse days. I did try volunteering at my local CAB and was training to be an advisor but the 2 day committment in a very hot office proved to be too much for my arm and I had to give it up. I have also done some paid work from home doing telephone fundraising for charities but had to give that up after 18months as there was more and more paperwork involved. So now i am back to being what my kids call " a lady who lunches" I meet regularly with some ex colleagues who are also retired and try to see friends as often as I can. My husband works shifts so is often around on weekdays which helps too. I read quite a lots and like getting out walking although regular bouts of Pneumonia and pleurisy (weak lung thanks to Rads) do drain my energy. Some advice I would give you is to check out your state pension situation. When i retired I thought i would be fine as I only needed 30 qualifying years to get a full pension and I had that but the goal posts have moved and now I will need 35 and am trying to workout what to do. I think it might help you to look for local volunteeering opportunities. When i am having a down day I try to remind myself that at least I do have an income and I can arrange things around how my arm feels which does take the pressure off. I do hope things work out for you Regards FF ... View more

Hi Happyshopper It's difficult for me to say as whatever i think is not neccesarily the same as the official stance. It looks to me like you have tried everything. If you have the support of your LD nurse Would it be possible to do what mine did and measure befor and after work. Mine was then able to confirm that work was aggravating the arm and she did me a letter stating that this had been done and that continuing with this aggravation would make the condition worse. I think that really helped me. I really hope it works out for you. Oh and i was 51 when i "retired" ... View more

Hello littlemrs and happyshopper I didn't mention in my post that I had had all possible adjustments made including change of desk, left handed mouse and numbers keypad, voice activated software (excellent program but could not work effectivley with our hardware) and change of working pattern. My pension plan terms were "not be able to do my job effectively". I know I was lucky and that sometimes the criteria is that you are not able to do any job. I really do feel for you both and wish you the best of luck. ... View more

Hi Happy shopper I believe i was dx at a similar time 2004 and I developed LD in 2006. My LD is also mild but in the words of my LE nurse "easily aggravated" I worked in an office and it caused real problems so I went for IHR and was lucky to get it. I had a letter from the LD nurse who had measured my arm before work one morning and after for comparison and then she went on to say that continuing to aggravate it this way would make the condition worse. My dominant arm is the one affected and I really felt that I had no choice. I was very lucky to have a supportive manager and colleagues and I was never made to feel i was giving up. I do miss working but my LD is easier to manage when i can do things at my own pace. I wish you luck with the application ... View more

Hi IWTL I know you are in a really bad place but things will get better. I was dx in 2004 and down for mx but with immediate recon , no Rads and no chemo. I came round in recovery to be told no recon done as node positive so I had had full clearance too and also nodule of cancer on skin . So I was left with a mx I wasn't prepared for (I was size 34F) and down for Rads and Chemo. I was devastated, I did crying shouting moaning etc bu eventuallyt managed to drag myself out of the black hole I felt I had been shoved into. I lost my hair which had been my crowning glory but bought two totally different fabulous wigs and chopped and changed depending on my mood. I was lucky to be able to work between chemos and also through most of the Rads and went on to have a TRAM recon and reduction on the other side. It all seems like a bad dream now 8 yrs on and I am sure you will get there too. You will find masses of support here and you will eventually feel better. What you are feeling now is perfectly normal but it will get better and I wish you the best ofluck with it all ... View more

Hi Kerry I am sorry you have had such news but hope to give you some encouragement. I was older than you at dx (48) wigh kids 11 and 15 but had similar path results. 3.5cm lump and extensive high grade DCIS had max and full clearance 2 positive nodes ER+ HER not tested, positive posterior margin , nodule of cancer in skin and vascular invasion. I had 6 FEC and then Rads followed by 2.5 yrs Tamoxifen and 2.5 yrs arimidex The reason i am posting is that it will be 8yrs next month for me and despite a dx of Lymphoedema in 2006 I am doing ok. I wish you the best of luck with the treatment ... View more

It is a while since I used it but it washed fine and I don't remember it being a problem.it was because the sleeve wasn't the best fit but i now have new ones which are much better. ... View more

A bit of Vaseline on before the sleeve will help but you may need to get the fit checked ... View more

Hope I can clarify this. There are 2 requirements for zero rating a. the customer must have a qualifying disability b. the item must be designed for that disability Mastectomy wear can be zero rated when sold to a qualifying person. This would be someone requiring it following breast surgery for cancer. The manufacturer cannot zero rate the goods when selling to the shops. A shop which sells normal bras can only zero rate genuine mastectomy bras. Some suppliers who specialise in mastectomy wear can zero rate bras which may not be specifically produced as mastectomy bras but are "held out for sale" as such because the shop is a specialist shop. Unfortunately not all shops understand the rules and frustrating as it is M and S appear to be correct. The retail price will already include VAT so the VAT element will not be 20% of the total it will be 1/6th I hope this helps ... View more

I feel for you having suffered from severe sickness after 4 GAs many years ago. I think I dreaded the after more than the actual op. Then I had a further op after an 8 yr break and the anaesthetist told me that anti sickness meds had improved a lot. Well I was amazed to be ok after and asked what he had used, In my case it was Granisetron and I asked to have this at my next 8 ops (5 for BC.) and it worked a treat. You need to speak to the anaesthetist and they may find something that helps you. Good luck with it and I hope it goes well PS Morphine makes me sick too so I have always tried to keep it to a minimum ... View more

Hi Happyshopper I think we have a similar history re coming off Tamoxifen after PE's in my case it was Tam for 2 1/2 yrs. I then went on to Arimidex and organised a DXA scan which showed a T score of 4.3. I had read reports of 2-3 yrs Tam followed by 2-3 yrs Arimidex being better than the original plan I had of 5 yrs for each. I therefore discussed this with my Onc and came off the Arimidex back in September after 2 1/2 yrs. I was ER + and had node involvement so had chemo but I am actually relieved to be off the meds particularly with my Osteoporosis. However had I wished to stay on it I could have I think you are totally justified in wanting a face to face discussion with your onc as you have been messed about already with changes not discussed. It sounds as if your GP was not too helpful either so if you can't get anywhere with the Onc perhaps andother doctor at the practice might be helpful. I wish you the best of luck ... View more

I believe MX scars vary considerably depending on the surgeon. I had only a two and a half inch scar from surgery which removed a kilo of tissue, I had been 34F, and full axillary node clearance. My surgeon had a reputation for keeping scarring to a minimum and seemed to have excelled himself in my case. Best wishes to all facing surgery ... View more