Breast Cancer Now Forum

Flutterbys United 💜 I too will pop on from time to time even if it's just to say hi!! Much love, travel light on your wings all my wonderful friends take care and now the adventure begins as we all find out what kind of Flutterby we have become, spoons and of course hugs xxxxx ... View more

I don't post very much these days as I just go rolling along and have been having counselling which made me rethink so much of what has gone on.Doz hunny as the first Flutterby leader 😊 I think you are pretty amazing with all you have had on your hands it's now time for you to focus on yourself and I am sure I speak for us all when I say how much we appreciate what you started we also send you the hand to hold for as long as it's needed. Jojosammy and Naz you are in the best place to offload and yes we do 'get it' I know I would have gone totally round the bend if it hadn't been for the flutterbys! The after care is hard to find for some of us and it does hit you when it's over cos you haven't a clue who you are or where you've been! The fatigue thing is so familiar I struggled and like you Jojosammy couldn't undertstand why I wasn't running marathons and stuff, I kept putting it down to chemo but then it dragged on eventually I saw my doc who sent me for tests and I ended up at rheumatology being told I have Fibro which really upset me so it's worth getting it checked out because sometimes it just might be something else 😞 We all deal with things our own way and this site has been a great example of this, when you read different people's experiences the one thing that stands out is that it affects us all differently and somehow we have to find a new kind of normal. I hope coming on here will help you the flutterbys have been a lifeline and I love my wonderful friends who saved my sanity (still bonkers but that's another story) take care all its ffffreezing so PJ's are the order of the day stay warm and flutter gently sending hugs to all Emm ... View more

🎄 🎄 🎄 happy christmas Flutterbys just fluttering in before walking the doggies, have an amazing New Year! Spoons,hugs and as ever love xxxx ... View more

Yay!!!!! It's a good feeling isn't it? I hope things are looking up for Phil bless him he has certainly had more than his share, I am sending you both hugs xxx ... View more

WELL DONE!! What a brave woman you are and I feel proud to know you! So glad you got round and I will be most interested in seeing our Janice covered in mud 🙂 bless you it's another step in the right direction for you!! I bet you were chuffed to finish I would have been!! I am in absolute awe you amazing Flutterby sending you loads of love and am sat here smiling xxxxx ... View more

Hi flutterbys, well Janice you made me smile 🙂 I was told to try coconut oil on our pup Dougie as he had an allergy to grass!! Poor little man was chewing his paw till it was raw but the alternative was steroids which we didn't want so looked for a natural alternative. The coconut oil is cold pressed,organic and .......works!!! We put a teaspoon into his food as well as rub it into his skin and it's been quite dramatic the improvement was immediate, I read up on it and it can be used for hair,skin and cooking as it smelled nice I thought I would try it on my lympho arm as I have to moisturise it and it is gorgeous! Shows that there is something in these natural remedies I think we have had enough of drugs so it is a relief to find that it works. The oil melts with body heat so I assume that would be the same as the castor oil it goes lovely onto skin but haven't tried it on my hair so will definitely give it a try 🙂 clever Doz I will be trying it out on my eyelashes too they are pathetic and used to be fair but long so when wearing mascara they looked good these days no matter how many coats I put on they don't look any different so another to try. I am so glad you have a date for Phil at least you can see a light at the end of the tunnel after all you have been through. Doz I am keeping fingers and toes crossed for Vik I so hope this is a start of getting her life back after all her problems, she has been lucky to have you there for her. Well life with two puppies is proving to be great fun, they are so funny and devoted to one another you honestly would think they had been together for years. Daisy certainly keeps Dougie on his toes she is a bouncy, funny dog and he sometimes gives a little huff when she torments him to play when he is trying to sleep but ends up flying round the house with her. We leave them for around two hours to shop once a week and the welcome is something else so nice to come home to. I have finally agreed to counselling as the doc suggested it some time back but I didn't want to at the time I just felt I wasn't ready,after all this time I agreed so the doc made the referral and I got a letter to say I would be offered a) one to one counselling, b) group therapy, c) an online course, d) or books to read provided by the NHS??? I just sat in total disbelief what a way to save money!!! I had a triage call on Monday and after going through some questions was asked did I feel suicidal?? I was horrible and replied if I did I would have to wait till I read the books or did the course so I guess by that she realised I was angry and did say she thinks I will need counselling but they don't do it there so another referral going in after a team meeting tomorrow!!? You couldn't make it up! So got to wait for a phone call to find out what the decision is,my lymph nurse suggested I ring the doc and put in a complaint as I was under the impression I had been referred for counselling and it went to the CBT team instead which was why the muddle. Well looking like summer is waving us goodbye, it's been too hot for us all here so am sneakily looking forward to some nice cool autumn days to walk the dogs. Well all I hope you have great success with the castor oil, I will try to keep up with everyone's postings I have so much to catch up on with so many postings sorry if I left you out as I just read about the Jamaican castor oil and couldn't resist will take a look now take care all spoons for those in need, hugs to all xxx ... View more

I just read your post Jane and know we all feel the same. I watched Kylie being interviewed about her cancer she is further down the road and she was very tearful so no matter who you are or how much money you have it hits us all hard, I find the ads will make me uncomfortable along with people who treat us like we had a bad dose of flu!! I think to be fair they move on trying to pretend it didn't happen not in a bad way but in fear of causing upset to us. Like Janice I feel better with each day but that gremlin will stay in my head somewhere at the very back and then something someone says will bring it to the fore!! As Doz says we have our gremlin but it isn't such a big one any more as time goes on it becomes more part of my past now and I don't pass up any chance for any opportunity to enjoy the days as they come.If I have a bad day/moment I tell myself tomorrow will be better 🙂 so far it works. If you feel the need for counselling then do go as Janice said it helped her, I found the flutterbys were my saviours where I could ask questions or have a general moan to so if it helps you go right ahead! More hugs from me along with spoons and much love Em xxxxx ... View more

Hi flutterbys! What lovely weather we are having 🙂 it so helps when the sun is shining! Well got my results yesterday morning.........CLEAR!!! It's only now that I realise I was mentally holding my breath and quietly stressing!! So went out for my fav Indian last night to celebrate and had a couple of glasses of wine 🙂 methinks I could happily turn into a lush! I don't drink much never have but I do enjoy it when I do! I hope things are plodding along for you all? Janice lovely how are things with you guys? I keep thinking of Phil and wishing for the best for you both it's about time! Well some good news (results aside) my step brother and his wife have been trying for a baby for around six years so they ended up seeing specialist who did some tests on sis only to find she had both cervical and womb cancer!! Poor woman was shattered about the fact it would mean no baby but had all the ops bless her she has just been told they got it all so no chemo needed she is now glad they were in the throes of seeing the specialist as they told her she would not have been here next year! She is now resigned to no babies but also glad to still be here and my step brother says he could not imagine what the outcome would be and likened it all to dropping off a cliff and not knowing if there would be a net on the other side! Funny enough she has joined a group online and says the only people who 'get it' are those who have been through it and I so agree. I had told her that I got my best support here and I wouldn't be where I am today without my beloved flutterbys. Well Dougie our puppy goes to have his op tomorrow and I am not looking forward to it I feel so guilty as he hates the vets with a passion, he shakes and wees as soon as we go through the door! We tried taking him to be weighed for a few weeks only to find he was getting more distressed at that so going to feel awful leaving him there 😞 funny how much little scraps mean to you after such a short time I couldn't imagine life without our little monster! Ah well it's got to be done so he will be getting spoilt for the rest of the week 🙂 Right I hope this finds you all enjoying the weather and you are all getting your robins in a row 🙂 Spoons for those in need, hugs and hand to hold Em xxxxx ... View more

Hi flutterbys, Janice you need the hand so sending it along to you as I know exactly how that feels!! It was like that for us for a few months, but bless you it seems never ending which is so unfair!! I know where you are coming from re people who seem to float through do whatever they like and nothing touches them! You can almost hear the buildings collapse as they go but behind them! Hubby does the same looks at some people and doesn't get it but then we aren't alone, I wouldn't wish anything like this on anyone but there does seem to be no real justice!! Rang hospital to be told that I need to talk to surgeons sec who is at another hospital so rang there went through the blasted silly hold music then got said sec who tells me all results from the mammo are always late by a couple of weeks??? So I asked if they had my results there to which she replied that surgeon has to look at them first so she can't say!!!! I was fuming as I received a letter this morning saying we are booking you in to see surgeon at this point I almost passed out a sense of déjà vu for a couple of secs then hubby asked if I was o.k I must have gone a shade green! I said I don't know read a bit further and it was for Jan next year!!!! I just wish they thought how anyone would feel getting that before a result is due and the b****y sec really patronised me saying they were up to date with all their apps and couldn't see why that would throw me??? Aaarrrggghhhh!!!!! It's so impersonal I felt like a name and number after all it wasn't my first mammo so I should know? Errr no! My first two results were back to me around a week later so I am going to put in a complaint with pals it isn't right when someone has already been through this merry go round a couple of times and no matter how many it is still as scary as the first!!!! Sorry just can't believe I ended up crying out of frustration and fear I do feel a bit silly now but it didn't at the time 😞 Ah well at least I got the sec to agree that she would look it up on computer and pass it on to the surgeon to see and says they will get letter out in a couple do days. I am not ungrateful for what treatment I have had but do feel there should be far more sensitivity when dealing with people's feelings and fears. Right got that off my chest and bless hubby he is cooking our meal and we might even open a bottle of wine!! Thanks for being here to moan at I know no one really understands like the flutterbys 🙂 sending spoons for those in need and hugs all round Em xxxxx ... View more

Funny that, I sat outside in the sun and a butterfly landed on my foot then sat there for ages! I felt so peaceful and couldn't help just smiling like an idiot, later on walking the dog we were dive bombed by a couple of beautiful peacock butterflies so yes I am convinced we all get a little visit from our very much missed and loved ami 😞 it does make me smile 🙂 Well still no word rang hospital but my Bcc nurse is on hols and the receptionist wasn't very helpful so no further forward! Did read that results should be given within two weeks so that's over so going to ring my surgeons secretary and see if she can help, it's so b***dy frustrating it would be good to tick that off for this year!! Had a voucher for Xmas from my DIL for bio nails so went today as we are going out for a meal next Sat with son and wife for my birthday, technician was lovely her mother had BC 7 years ago as she asked if I was on medication so explained and found out that the reason for my crap nails is the meds!! I can grow them but they are weak and just snap at the slightest tap so looks like another legacy from all the s***e! Just getting some bits done in garden and waiting for some plants to be delivered hopefully the weather will be better well the forecast looks promising so fingers crossed. Doz my flower time to rehearse retirement and as Janice says it's so much less financially but we do have some valuable time together we don't need to rush anywhere and no stress!!! I look back and can't believe I worked full time doing 24 hour shifts (sleep ins) and went out teaching four evenings a week!!! I must have been totally bonkers so this may the wall I crashed into to put a stop to it all 🙂 Take care flutterbys and good luck for Phil let's hope it is now almost over ,spoons for Phil too! So spoons and hugs all round Em xxxxxx ... View more

Happy anniversary to you both 🙂 have a tipple in fact have as many as you like! 😉 loads of love from us both xxxxx ... View more

Hi Janice we have been trying to catch up with ourselves after being away for two weeks and the garden has been the worst!! It's more like a huge field but now the shrubs we planted are starting to grow nicely so that should take care of the border we are just awaiting delivery of plants for hanging baskets and troughs so we will be back on track soon! Well we will be if this blasted weather would stay put for a few days! It's hard to plan and I am afraid I am a fair weather sort of gardener and so is hubby. Poor Phil it's rotten waiting around I just wish they would just get on with things but I know it's a bit more complicated than that it's just so unfair! I had my mammo last week and am still waiting for results but am banking on if I had something to worry about they would have been in touch by now? So not borrowing tomorrow's problems I reckon we have all learnt to live for the day now 🙂 I have been to rheumy clinic and am going to be sent on a course for Fibro once a week for six weeks I am not too sure about it but I reckon it may stop me feeling like I am slowly going mad! My specialist nurse has arranged it but I have pointed out how strange it is that I get support for this but never had it for BC? I am not ungrateful but do wonder how things get prioritised. I do hope that things have settled for all our flutterbys I have sort of caught up and hope that everyone is o.k. Sending the usual spoons and hugs to all Em xxxxx ... View more