Breast Cancer Now Forum

Helloooo I just wanted to drop in and see how you are? Did you manage Tuscany camping without melting?  I hope you're ok anyway?  Just wanted to check in and say hi All is ok here, no real news, but fine Sending lots of love and thinking of you anyway xxx ... View more

Sounds like it's been intense - it's horrible when something happens like that and you feel it's the end of everything. Maybe it all just needed to blow up to calm down - sounds like things are a bit calmer now? I guess it will just be something you have to take day by day for a bit. Sounds tough. Sending you a big hug.    On the hot flushes front, I do recommend accuncture if you can find someone but I guess it probably depends on the practitioner too, (I love mine, and it's definitely like getting counselling too!) - what else have you tried for the hot flushes? There are some diet things you can do like diet, avoiding caffiene etc...   Re dog - yes he knows, he just doesn't know what to do. I'm not sure whether that is good enough, but at the same time I feel a bit stuck as well. we shall see xx ... View more

Oh gosh that's a lot going on. It doesn't sound like you're getting too much time for yourself and self care. Promise me you'll do something nice for yourself, even if it's just setting some time to have a bath or read or whatever chills you out. I'm ok thanks. Bumbling along. No periods again and just fat and frumpy and hormone -y really. Have a two friends who are having a few mental health issues and one who's mum's had bc. She had a lumpectomy and lymph out but is skipping chemo and is having radio and hormone treatment so now they know what they are dealing with. I'm going to tak3 her some aloe Vera gel on Saturday as it really helped me. Other than that all has been fine apart from this morning where the dog had wedged the ball on the other side of the kitchen door i tried to stick my foot around to move it so he went for my foot. Which makes me hystetically cry. It hadnt happend for months and i thought it was over and I don't know what to do. My husband says he just does that with balls!! It's making me question everything again. I suppose I'm still I shock.im not hurt as I had my shoe on. ... View more

That does sound weird 're your mum but if she is ok in herself, that's good and you can keep an eye on her. What are the shenanigans? You ok? Xx ... View more

Yes at least we have the sunshine. Hope his grump stops soon. Mine is intermittently grumpy too but mostly just tried and a bit broken. We've seen quite a few people this week and I think instead he could have done with just relaxing. I have a heavy week next week in work so haven't managed muxh in the house this week just haven't felt like it. I am rubbish. Ah well. Now I can just blame it on the bag of hormones x ... View more

When will you hear re  the tests? Hopefully it is a turning point for her and she's on the way back up - it's good that she's being positive regardless eh? I expect you're still worrying though, but there's nothing you can do until you know if there's anything you have to deal with. How's your eldest? Is he any better?  Sounds like you've still got lots going on.  I'm ok, had a real downwood spiral that went a bit weirdly introspective the last few weeks (questioning all my choices, and how I behave and what I do) so that was fun lol - but I think it's the hormone shifts as I had one period in Feb and then nothing since then 😞 anyway, feeling ok now and the sun is shining for once which always makes a difference. I hope that you got some rest and that today goes ok. xxxx ... View more

I'm so sorry to hear that she's so poorly. Keeping everything crossed for you - really hope she turns a corner. Sounds like you're pulling yourself in every direction. I can't believe your new boss has been off sick! It sounds like it's all just piling on. It doesn't help if your body is all over the place - it means you don't sleep which gives you more time to worry about your mum and your son and everything else in between.  Maybe after wednesday things will start to get better and you can take a breath. You're probably so tired all the time because the night sweats wake you up, you've got a heap load of responsibility at work you weren't expecting and you're busy worrying about eveyone else.  Try not to worry about that  on top of eveything else. I was with my friend who's also had BC this weekend (I finished treatment in 2012 and she finished treatment in 2014 so we're well ahead of you and even now we still get tired - it's a lot better but every now and then it all piles up. You've got a particularly large amount on your plate at the moment so it's probably just taking its toll.  Sending a big hug and let me know how you get on on Wednesday xxxx ... View more

Hey just wanted to check in and see how you're doing? All is ok here. I have had one period but now waiting (it's been six weeks) I'm really fat and my body is all over the place but I am generally good. How are things with you? Xx ... View more

Bless your mum hope shes better soon. I'm so glad you're enjoying the job that's fabulous. I'm not sure what's happening here. Need to sort myself out but I've got a weekend seeing family coming up and can't wait. Thst should help a bit. Sending a big hug. Thanks for the advice xx ... View more

How funny I was literally just thinking about you. February has judt flown by hadn't it? Sorry to hear you've had flu. That's rotten. Especially with the new job too. How are you now? Is your heating fixed? I'm ok. Had a rubbish week. It was my dad's anniversary last week and I've been really feeling it foursome reason. Work has also been awful and the two things collided with me ending up in tears which I hate. Not sure what to do really. Also my periods haven't come back but I feel all hormonal so that's odd. Have my info apt shortly so will have a chat with her then. How's your mum? Is she better now? Hope so. Sending lots of love x ... View more

Oh no that sounds rotten bless her. Hopefully she's on the mend now. Must be hard with both her being ill and worrying about your eldest. I'm ok I met a friend from my old job yesterday and we talked about lots of stuff including babies and dogs. I always feel a bit guilty after talking about what's in my head like it's too much if you know what I mean? Or maybe thst I should keep it in. I don't know. Anyway it's Friday hurrah! So glad your job is going well xx ... View more

Working in occupational health shouldn't you be able to ask for a fan? Glad my bobble had made you smile. I often wear my wellies too. My OH says I'm embarrassing (makes me realise how like my mother I am) speaking of which how is your now? X ... View more

Yes they do dont they? What a nightmare re the hot flushes it's so uncomfortable particularly at work and even more in a new job. Ask for a fan on your desk so you can cool down quickly without making it a bit deal, that really helped me. And I'm sure you already do this but make sure you've always got water to hand. If I'm really struggling I drop a bit on my wrists etc or even just hold it to cool down if I don't want to swap it. I've been walking to work to get my exercise up and when I arrive my sweaty hair (from under my fetching bobble hat) is plastered to my pink round face and it's always at this point my boss comes in and wants a chat 😂😂😂 It must be so weird to move away from patient care after so long but you're still doing important work and I'm sure all your experience of dealing with people makes you brilliant at it and people appreciate your approach xxd ... View more

Oh I know she means well and as i said she us right. I think it's because it feels like she's fixating on it and it's a sensitive issue. Maybe because it's my sensitive issue i would prefer to talk about it when i bring it up not every time we talk? Its not like it isnt something I'm constantly thinking about anyway. She isn't very sensitive to stuff like that, just says what she wants which I love about her but is also a bit much sometimes if you know what I mean? Interesting 're your theory, i think as well when you're on your own you don't need to compromise (obviously) which makes it harder to understand people doing it. She's funny actually, really goes on about me doing too much or compromising too much to others but then wants me to do what she wants all the time.... 're dog he's 3. Hes had a fair bit of training. I keep thinking about a behaviouralist too.... need to be in the right mindset to deal with these things haha Thanks for listening. Hope youre ok x ... View more

That's good re feeling less tired. Youre right it takes time to adjust to a new job sounds like youre getting into it. I'm ok thanks. Feel so much lighter now I've made a decision. Although i text my oldest friend the other day to see how she was and she asked me about the dog and just said 'the dogs got to go'. Which annoyed me a bit as a) I hadn't brought it up and b) she might be right but it's complicated. Then she was all all 'I'm here offering an ear'' when in reality she has an opinion and brings it up constantly. We (me and himself) had a couple of chats about it over Christmas and he offered to get him put down as no one is taking him and he feels it's not fair to put him with a charity but he was so distraught over it I couldn't bear it and couldn't make him. I know she is worrying about me. I know it's a stupid position we have got ourselves into but it's almost as if she'd like me to leave him over it. She is divorced and after a period of years is feeling happy and because I haven't been has been trying to 'help'. When in reality having someone say 'you're not happy' has not helped me really. I haven't told her about the baby thing as a) she's never wanted kids and b) I can't deal with the dissection of it all from her perspective. I think perhaps that because I'm quite laid back and not particularly fiesty (unless properly riled) people think they can say whatever the he'll they like to me. It has been a difficult time. But fundamentally I've learned that after everything we have been through together I do put him above everything else as he is my family even if he has been a bit of an idiot over it. Last time we were talking she also tried to say that because she had a difficult marriage and divorce she understands everything I've gone through with the cancer and losing both my parents, she said ' I know I've not had a serious illness or lost any close family yet but...' which is interesting, my sister who has been divorced was a bit like that over it too, felt like its so traumatic it is worse than anything else anyone else has ever been through. I guess we all deal with our life experiences differently eh? Waffle over. Oooh that made me think of waffles..... ... View more

Oooh it sounds good. Sounds like we need to both take it a day at a time 😀 i think ill be fine just going to deal with each thing as it comes and to be honest nothing will happen in the next few months as I need to let the tamoxifen get outta my system so you can relax and concentrate on beieng brilliant at your new job 😀Dunno re folic acid. Will have to ask xxx ... View more

Don't apologise. How's it going? Are you enjoying it? Thank you so much for your message. You always make me feel better. I'm just going to go for it and try not to worry. Although last night i stayed up googling oldee mothers and all the problems people have so ended up beating myself up for not doing it last year lol. Anyway thanks so much.dont worry if you haven't got the energy to update me about work. Just see how you feel. I'm so pleased youve made the change. It will take some time to adjust but I think occupational health will be a great thing for you. Hope you get to chill at the weekend xxx ... View more

Hey hope it's going ok? How are you doing? I'm ok but I've had a bit of a panic about babies and come off the tamoxifen. My oncologist said it would be ok as I've done five years which until recently was all I would have had. I need to give it three months to get it out of my system. Then can try. I'm going to contact the fertility clinic to see what they say 're my embryoes. Am thinking do this year. If nothing happens I will be nearly 44 so can stop and at least I've tried. Not sure if I'm mad. Not sure whether it's the right thing to do but it's now or never. Keep having little whirls of anxiety about it but just going to concentrate on being healthy and getting fit and then seeing what happens. As you know I've always struggled with it. And even now I don't know if it's the right thing not least because I'm so tired all the time and I wonder whether I could actually hack it after spending so long not having anyone to look after. Also the threat of recurrence scares me a lot and the worry that id get pregnant and then get ill again. But every parent has to think of these things I'm sure. Also sex is still pretty painful. I've just got some new stuff to try and see if it eases it. I'm hoping it will improve post tamoxifen. I haven't told anyone what im doing as I think I need to process it a bit more. Had chat with hubby and said it's now or never really. Dog is still here but im still trying to rehome him a d will just play that by ear really. Can't just wait for ever with nothing happening. Sorry to write it all on here but I need to get it out somewhere and don't feel like I can talk to anyone else. Don't worry if you don't get chance to respond I know you have a lot goi g on and it's a big change for you. Take care xx ... View more

Just wanted to say happy New year. Hope the last day of your job went well and this year brings lots of happy times and the new job goes brilliantly xxxx ... View more

So it's nearly christmas. Hope youre ok and things have calmed down a bit? Im so glad to have finished work nothing to do but relax, cook, eat and drink now 😀😁 sending you lots of love. 2018 beckons wirh your exciting new job and hopefully a better work/life balance. Big hugs xxx ... View more