Breast Cancer Now Forum

Hi, It's good to hear that you are getting some answers from somewhere at least.  The bcn at my hospital have not rung/ visited me and was not aware of this being the norm, however, I guess i'm lucky that they have always responded fairly quickly whenever i've left a message.  Your bcn must be very over-stretched, which isn't her fault but then that's no consolation to you is it.  All I can suggest is that you continue to be persistent but use all the avenues suggested by Helen to get the support you need.   Jackie xx ... View more

Hi BeejayP, In case you want to think about what to wear once back home, this is what i've found comfy.  I'm living in joggers and zip-up sweat tops, all 1 size larger than usual size.  These are all from Asda (very cheap) and have been brill. I was told by bcn to wear bra and tight pants.  However consultant said this was not necessary and just to wear what is comfy.  So I sort of compromised. I bought a couple of front fastening bras (£7ish) from Amazon which I wear occasionally.  And some really cheap big full knickers from Primark (2 sizes+ above normal size) which are comfy as they cover all the tum and go higher than my new belly button so don't rub.   The joggers compress the tummy area instead of tight pants and do feel like they are helping to support that area.  Hope this is of some use. Jackie xx ... View more

Hi HFK1234, Sounds like you've had one hell of a day.  I've had days where I've hardly got out of bed and blubbered on and off all day.  Then, the next day i've found myself walking my dog and looking at how beautiful everything is and feeling happy with life.  As Helen says, the thing is, we don't have that much control over our emotions, however much we try and think positive thoughts there are times when it's all too overwhelming.  In my 49 years on this planet I can honestly say that i've never experienced such an array of emotions in such a relative short space of time (that in itself is exhausting!).  Tomorrow, the next day or even the day after that you will find that you have the strength to take the next steps and decisions on this journey.  Sending you lots of hugs. Jackie xx ... View more

Hi teeworth,   I am so sorry to hear about you losing your son.  That is something that none of us should ever go through and I cannot begin to imagine the affect that this would have on your life.     You know only too well how important early diagnosis is, so I was pleased to read that you were going to contact your GP.  Let's hope that you ARE being  a hypochondriac - but if it results in you having peace of mind and being able to get a good night's sleep then it'll still have been worthwhile won't it.   All my love Jackie xx. ... View more

Hi, Re the recovery time after mast and recon.  Like some of you ladies have mentioned, i've no idea what the actual recovery time is, seems to be anything from 5- 10 weeks.  I suppose it depends on whether or not you experience any probs along the way, and if lymph nodes are removed, aswell as the type of job you do and the support you could expect once back at work.  I know that I will be expected to give 100%, if not on day one, certainly by day 2!  So, when I do feel ready to go back, I will be negotiating a phased return.  I think that employers have to allow this (but I haven't read up enough to confirm it).  Surely, this benefits everyone, rather than rushing back to work prematurely only to find yourself back at the Drs.   If we can't prioritise our own health now, then we never will.  Jackie xx ... View more

Well when I go back in to see my boss I won't be putting my make-up on then! X ... View more

Hi,   I'm now 2 weeks post op following mast with diep recon.  I was in hospital for a week and for the first 4 days or so after surgery wore hospital gowns, after that I wore button up night shirts (BHS sale) and these worked well for me.     You will also need slippers (slip on type to avoid bending to get them on). Wet wipes came in handy along with the regular toiletries. The most discomfort I experienced during the first 3 days was from headache and constipation which was quite distressing and the nurses wouldn't/couldn't give me anything to relieve this discomfort. The wet wipes were cooling on my forhead and helped relieve that, as for the stomach pain I wish I'd taken in some peppermints/ mint tea (as previously read on one of the forums- but didn't do as I'm not a tea drinker but would have willingly given a try).   A pen came in handy for ticking my menu options as well as a notepad for jotting down anything (questions to ask etc) which I was apt to forget.  On the last day or so I flicked through a magazine but apart from this didn't feel the need for any other 'distractions'.     Finally, some warm clothes to go home in (zip/button fronted) and flat shoes/trainers.  Think that's about it. Hope you find some of this helpful.  Jackie xx ... View more

Hi HFK1234, You do have a dilemna, I don't envy you.  There are so many pros and cons aren't there.  The model on facebook you mention, was being discussed on Loose Women a couple of days ago, so I saw that photo.  Not for long though, as I had to turn it off - it was a bit too close to home. She did look badly scarred.  I am just recovering from a mast with diep recon and do not think that my scarring is that bad. I've 'only' had a single mast tho.  The breast scar is around the areola, so in time i'm hoping that with tattooing it will merge in with the rest of the skin.  The tummy scar is wide but falls below the bikini line. In fact, I will look better in a bikini than I have for years as i've now got a nice flat tummy too.  Obviously, it's a personal choice and you've a lot of thinking to do, but hope this info can be of some use amongst the mass of other info that must be running round your head. Xx ... View more

And, by the way, Stumble, you are just as important as the other ladies, so don't wait to see a bcn on the 'off chance', make an appointment so that you get some undivided attention with her where you can really share your deeper feelings. Xx ... View more

Hi Stumble, Just a thought. Did you feel like this before the mastectomy?  I'm wondering if you were ok with it before because you know they needed to do all this to 'repair' you.  Now, the job's done (at least from a medical/physical aspect), I can understand that you may want to be left alone for a while.  I thought it a bit weird that my bcn told me to caress my new breast regularly, but I can now see that this is all part of acceptance.  Maybe the feelings you are experiencing are because you need time to get used to your new body and feel confident with it before putting it back on public display.  Maybe you should share your feelings with your bcn too before they get too set in as these nurses do seem to have answers to everything. Xx ... View more

Hi Isa, 10 months old - that must be difficult as he won't be able to understand and it must be very frustrating for you. Has he got one of those little seats on wheels (baby walker?) so that he can propel himself around - and tire himself out? My kids used to love this.  It won't stop him from wanting you at times but may help a little. Jackie xx ... View more

Hi ladies, Glad you're finding each day just that bit easier, Isa.  For me it's now a pleasure to wake up (and I haven't felt like that for a long time).  I remember the pains you mention.  I had my lymph nodes biopsied when I had the lumpectomy and having since been through a mastectomy and diep (tummy slit from hip to hip) it was the pain from the biopsy that was still the most memorable- it seemed to affect all the left side of my upper body. Just make sure you do the exercises you are told to do as they really do make a difference.  Lucky you, keeping your nipple.  Mine had to go, sadly.   I know what you mean about the Drs struggling to give good news.  In my case in each of the various consultations I have been given the good news followed by the 'possible' bad news.  Whilst this played on my mind during the waiting periods, I can't accuse them of giving me false hopes at any point, so when I did get the various diagnostics, I was semi-prepared for it - which I think worked well for me.  I must say that throughout my journey I feel that I have had the best care possible - from Wolverhampton New Cross and Birmingham Queen Elizabeth in case there are any local gals reading this:).  Hope all goes well with your appointment next week, Isa. Jackie xx ... View more

HI Em72, Have just posted a reply to another lady, TG, which is also appropriate for you. So could you read that one too. Unfortunately there is no magic fix to get us through these waiting periods so we just have to get through it in any way possible.  I do know that during these times my house has never been cleaner, crikey, how I've scrubbed, tidied, dug ......  This has not only kept my mind occupied and, as much as possible (!) off THE subject, but enabled me to sleep well at night due to exhaustion.  It might not be for everyone, quite a few ladies like brain stimulating activities, so you need to find coping strategies that suit you.  I would add that there were also days when I barely surfaced as I couldn't be bothered to face the day - but that's fine too ocasionally.  Hope this is of some use Em. Xx ... View more

Hi TG, I know that waiting for results is really difficult so can empathise with you.   Try and take consolation from the fact that they are being very thorough, and have your best interests at heart.  How long did they say you will have to wait?  Of course you will have very bleak moments, crikey, we are human after all -  but however much anxiety you are feeling this will not change the outcome, so keep thinking positive thoughts and enjoying the here and now.  This way of thinking certainly helped me get through my waiting periods and keep my sanity.  Hope it can help you - if only a teeny weeny bit.  Lots of love. Jackie xx ... View more

Hi, I'm thinking of making myself a little badge appropriately placed saying 'It's this one!' Jackie xx ... View more

Hi Angie55. Hiphiphooray! Fabulous news.  Best of luck with the final bits of treatment and an end to all this. X ... View more

Hi rosie112, I do feel for you having to go through this.  It seems like you are in safe hands and with a plan on a week to week basis it's hopefully easier to manage the waiting periods. Will keep my fingers tightly crossed for you for next week, Suzanne.   Jackie Xx ... View more

Hi dh, It made me cry reading your post. You should be enjoying time with your new baby not having to go through this s--t.  All I can say is that the time you are spending with your baby is so special and you won't get this back - so use this to keep you focused.  You WILL get through the cancer and whatever treatment you need and this nasty disease wants to take away your beautiful memories with your baby - don't let it!   Jackie xx ... View more

Hi Louise, Your results have obviously shaken you. We talk of this journey we are on don't we, the bummer is that we don't know where it will take us.  Try and take some control back by thinking of the positives, ie her neg, oestrogen pos, not all lymph nodes affected, and not least that it is being sorted and you are in safe hands.  This still won't stop you journeying through those dark places as what you are going through now is probably one of the most emotional parts of the whole lot - but it will help you get through to next week.  Sending lots of love. Jackie xx ... View more

Hi BlueRose, Am just back home after mastectomy with diep reconstruction and am pleased with outcome.  Will gladly share any parts of my journey with you - just say the word.  My op was done at B'ham QE. Jackie xx ... View more