Breast Cancer Now Forum

Good morning, hope everyone"s doing ok, well, as well as can be expected. Can't believe this is my last zap, by 8.30 this morning I hope to be walking out of the Rosemere Centre in Preston (brilliant place) having finished! Well, for the time being anyway, not sure what might be coming up for me, but not focussing on that right now. Driving down to Bristol later today to help my son move. Going in two cars so just have to hope my husband makes it some time today, lol, he seems to struggle to follow instructions from Mrs Sat Nav! Anyway rambling on now, can't believe it's the last zap, so to all of you having your last zap, my very warmest wishes to you, pat yourselves on the back that you've completed the course, and to those of you with some more to go, you'll soon be in this place too, and for a lot of you it will be before Christmas, which has to be something to celebrate! Take care everyone, and have a great weekend. Btw, the weather is blooming awful up here! Love Janexxxxx ... View more

Last zap on Friday too, can't wait! Take care everyone xxx ... View more

Thank you for your replies, and I know I have to just get through this the best way I can. Have turned into itchy Robin Redbreast, so using hydrocortisone cream on top of E45 as per hospital instructions. Have to keep telling myself I'm not Wonderwoman and do people really expect me to do as much as I normally do? 4 nails now gone, my darling daughter keeps telling me they don't look so bad! Hoping by Christmas I'll be able to enjoy a glass of wine or two, can only hope! My hair is growing back, unfortunately the top looks like a rug (white with a few dots of silver grey - I'm 57) and I'm sure if a brick was dropped on my head it would just bounce off!!! Can't wait for this next week to be over, I've got all 8am spots so hoping will be seen on time and be back in the car before 8.30am. I've a round journey of just over 50 miles, and compared to some of you this is nothing! Thanks for your support, it's such a relief to get things off my chest(!!). Btw, any June chemo posters out there, the thread seems fairly quiet? Take care one and all, xxxxx ... View more

Hi, I haven't posted since chemo, so several weeks have passed (finished 24 Sept, then more surgery on 18 Oct). Have had 15 zaps and have 5 boosts to go. Still suffering se's from chemo, my nails are so dreadful I wear gloves the whole time I'm out of the house (3 nails lost, only 7 to go, why can't they just all go at the same time and get it over with?) I thought my taste was improving but it's still bad, wine tastes like vinegar still, how unfair is that? Body clock up the creek, wake before 4am everyday without fail & can't get back to sleep because my mind's racing, husband thinks I should be back to his sexy wife by now, but I'm nowhere near that place yet, and feel I never will be. Christmas is driving me mad with everything that needs to be done, even though I'm putting myself under pressure and nobody else. Basically I just want to know when will I start to feel like me again and not this cardboard cut out? No answer to that really, we're all different. I think I'm just ranting now, as I can't really say any of this to anyone, even though I've got great friends who've supported me all the way through and a husband who's tried to be supportive and failed miserably at times. Apologies, there are lots of you out there who've had a terrible time I know, but I just want to be me again. Take care all of you, sorry for this post. Enjoy your weekend xxxx ... View more

Hi Cas, I'm definitely hoping it's a bike!! xx ... View more

Thanks Sue and Roxie. Having come through the FEC part quite well, this has really taken me by surprise. My hands have improved over the last two days, but sadly not my feet. The really annoying part has been not being able to walk very far. Whenever I've felt a bit low, I've taken myself off for a good long walk, or gone with a friend, and now I can't even stand putting a pair of shoes on, as every part of my feet seem to hurt! Gosh, what a misery I am! And I'm sure someone has whacked my big toes with a hammer, they're so darned painful! Feel like 102 years old!!!! Here endeth the moan. Like the song says, "things can only get better ....!!!" Best wishes to everyone. Jane xxxxx ... View more

Have just got back from seeing oncologist prior to 2nd tax due on 3rd Sept. He has decided to reduce dose by 25% due to neuropathy. He says because the risk of it being permanent is quite high, following this next round if I don't fare any better, they may decide not to give me the final chemo. Also, if I haven't picked up enough physically the next round will be put back a week. Feel like a lightweight, and not sure if this is what I want to happen, which sounds a bit cockeyed, I know, considering how awful my feet, in particular have been. Has anyone else suffered with hand and feet issues? Hope everyone is holding up, so close to the end now! Wishing you all a good weekend, whatever you've got planned. Best wishes Janexxxx ... View more

Hi Cowgirl Fantastic news! So very pleased for you and you must be so relieved. Fingers crossed that the treatment you've had so far will be sufficient and that anything you have next, like tamoxifen will continue to keep things going along the right path. Take good care of yourself. Best wishes Jane xxxxx ... View more

Hi Cowgirl, thinking about you and hoping you get your MRI results quickly and can get this awful vertigo etc sorted successfully and with a good outcome for you. I'm sure everyone on this thread is wishing you well. Janexxxx ... View more

Morning one and all! Up with the lark, actually I don't think anything was stirring at 2 am, no correction, husband was snoring for England, the rest of the UK and Europe! Was already awake though, probably thanks to pondering about starting tax today and also no doubt down to yesterday's steroids, even though I took them before 11am. Never mind! All in a good cause. Hope everyone having treatment today fares well, and of course best wishes and positive thoughts to the rest of you whatever stage you're at. And Jinny, if you happen to read this, chin up, best foot forward and remember you're going through this difficult time in order to give you the best possible chance of beating bc! We're all going through it, you're not alone, and certainly lots of other people are suffering with you. Take care, let us know how you get on. I'm going to load the washing machine, make another cup of coffee and see what delights I can find on Netflix to pass the next hour! Best wishes to everyone xxxxxxx ... View more

Hi Jinny, I move onto tax on Wednesday and can understand your anxiety. My oncologist gave me some info on possible side effects and what to do to help alleviate them - have you not had anything from your oncology team? As far as I know, se's are likely to kick in after about 4 days, and will be similar to flu symptoms. I was advised to take paracetamol or ibuprofen, and should these not help then to contact the oncology unit and they would prescribe something stronger. Apparently nausea and sickness should not be as bad as with Fec. Hope this helps you until someone else posts who has already started on tax. When will you have your treatment? Take care and try not to worry, easier said than done I know, but I'm sure tax won't be as bad as you're expecting. A good friend of mine who had the same treatment last year, said the worst se for her was fatigue, so that's perhaps something you could focus on rather than anything more debilitating. ... View more

Morning Athens, really hope you're on the mend now - what a pain for you - I'm thinking of you and hope you'll be back home pdq. Anger seems to have subsided, thankfully, but I'll try to post any funny things that happen along the way. Trust me, my husband is one of a kind and manages to come out with some absolutely outrageous comments most days, so I'll have to write them down and post them and hope I can make everyone giggle! Take good care of yourself, I'm off to town to meet a friend for coffee, which I won't drink as everything tastes foul, and she'll no doubt have something to say about my lack of hair and chosen form of disguise (I'm thinking of buying some fake fruit like cherries etc to add to my headscarves etc!) Anything to raise a smile! Sending lots of positivity over the airwaves! Janexxxxx ... View more

Thank you for your replies - makes me feel much better knowing I'm not the only one! When I told my husband about the blonde girl in the bedroom dream, he said, wait for it, 'was she wearing any clothes?' Well, I nearly started up all over again and then decided to just laugh. Men! He thought he was being soooo funny ..... Got it wrong again! Love to all, hope everyone's getting some sunshine.xxxxx ... View more

Apologies for my post, shouldn't have gone on like that, holidays can be rebooked next year, I know. So sorry. Janexxxx ... View more

So sorry but I'm going to have a rant! Yesterday was such a bad day and not because of physical problems. I drove my daughter and her boyfriend to Manchester airport, they have four weeks away in in Singapore, Malaysia, Bali and somewhere else I can't remember. The drive there was fine, all of us chatting, my husband handing out lots of advice about food to eat etc, (like my daughter doesn't know being a seasoned traveller!) and then we got to the airport. Meltdown. My daughter sobbed, then I cried. Oh dear, what a pair we looked. She was so upset because we all should have been away enjoying fabulous times - her brother and his girlfriend already started their holiday 10 days ago) and we should have left on 25 June. Anyway, I managed to calm us down and off they went. Drive home was uneventful, I quite enjoyed it really. However, I didn't enjoy the rest of the day. Couldn't settle, felt incredibly ANGRY, and ended up going for an 8.5 mile walk along the canal, looking over the bay to the Lakeland fells which normally lifts my spirits.The only thing was, everyone I met, instead of saying hi, or greeting me in some way, seemed to not want to do that, unless I smiled first and said hello and then it seemed to be only the chaps, possibly because I was wearing headgear clearly to cover baldness, jeggings, trainers and a waterproof, whilst they were in shorts and tee shirts! I of course was feeling cold and they were obviously not! When I finally got back, my husband suggested a glass of wine and to get drunk with him, probably joking, but all I could say was, oh, that's really going to be good for me! Total misery. The evening went from bad to worse, each of us preparing our own meals because I haven't been able to eat much since start of chemo, before sitting down to eat together. I went off for a relaxing bath (joke) while he listened to music. I went to bed at 10.30 because I was completely done in. Nightmares then followed, culminating in me bashing a blond haired woman sitting in a bedroom with my husband with a pair of ghd hair straighteners! Not much sleep after that! Got up at 5, finished clearing up the kitchen, fed the cat, cleaned her litter tray and had breakfast on my own. Hope today will be better .... Here endeth the rant. Sorry to all of you suffering far more than me, I just can't cope with how angry I felt yesterday - first time since dx in April. Hope next time I post it will be with something to make you all laugh .... Best wishes to you all out there and let's hope today will be much better! Jane xxxxx ... View more

Good morning, hope this brings a smile to all of you out there. Thought I'd apply a facemask this morning to try to plump out my wrinkles, and of course, just as I'd put it on the post lady rang the doorbell. However, what I'd forgotten about was that I had no beanie on to hide my bald head! So I said, 'Ooh, sorry to scare you, I've just put this face ask on!' Her face was a picture! The facemask has a very fetching green tinge to to it so combined with the lack of hair, she probably thought I was auditioning for a horror film! Maybe not that funny now, perhaps had to be there. Anyway, off for 2nd Fec at 1.30pm. By 3.30 pm I'll be a third of the way through. Good luck to everyone, hoping for minimal se's again .... Fingers crossed. ... View more

Morning all! Start FecT today, so sending lots of luck and good wishes to everyone on this thread, let's kick this .............. into touch! Take care all of you Janex ... View more

Hi Sandie Sorry that you're struggling with the basics - sleeping and eating. I'm a bit ahead of you but can identify with what you're going through. Yesterday my picc line went in, ready for chemo on Wednesday.  I have struggled to eat and sleep since my diagnosis. I wake before 4.30am every day. However, I get up, have a cup of tea, try some cereal and then get on with things that need doing! By 6.45 am I'm out walking a minimum of 4 miles every day (usually do about 7), come rain or shine. I find taking excersise and setting myself goals helps a great deal.  I would start running again but my surgeon suggested sticking with walking until I get through chemo. I had surgery on 1 May and have been told I will require more following chemo. As to my appetite, its so difficult to enjoy food anymore, I eat to please my husband, children and friends.  But I do know that I need to eat in order to be strong enough to carry on with the treatment ahead. I eat very small meals throughout the day, so maybe you could try eating little and often and see if that helps. I try to have something every 1-2 hours, even if its only a cracker! Also, before I go to bed (around 11.30ish) I go for a walk and when I get back have a relaxing bath and drink herbal tea. And I never use the internet after 8pm! I've no idea if this is of any help to you, but perhaps give it a try. Take care, with my best wishes to you Janex ... View more