Breast Cancer Now Forum

Hi Susie soo I know i am a bit behind the times replying to thiis, I just wanted to say I agree with everything that you said, I think that we have a duty ( a bit Of a heavy word) to discourage women from having immediate reconstruction. Its not in womens interests to have a bit of muscle stuffed on their chest wall and call it a breast, because bluntly thats what they do. I just want to know how to move on, when every day you experience at the most pain and at the least tightness and restriction. Its a very lonely place to be. Most people think it tikerty boo that you have a new boob. . I did nt even have any symptons of cancer, i was n:t ill. I am meant to begrateful. Well personally its all been medical overkill. A first world problem, that can never be resolved.  i am fed up  of it all. Its just good that a few other people can visit me in the pit from time to time.Sorry if I sound sorry for myself.  and bitter, but its got to come out some where.I can only be Polly anna in short bursts, then I have to go back to taking an axe to the sofa. Only joking folks.. Point of interest, apparently if you have breast reconstruction for other reasons, you have a psychological assessment prior to surgery., just maybe that could be the same for reconstructions post cancer,  Right i have stopped ranting. Hugs to all my sisters who are suffering alone .   ... View more

Hi Ladies I totally agree with what you say especially soosie sue. I think plastic surgeons are egotistical and think they are creating something wonderful (not)Any ladies out there thinking of having reconstruction, Just do not even consider it. there is more to a woman than a pair of breasts. Maybe that should be our campaign, Breasts do not make a woman. Not ones made from numb muscle anyway As for empathy and understanding from nurses. The nurses that I encounted on my surgical ward could not be kind or empathic to save there lives. I had to spend a week with them, when I complained( I was a nurse for 25 years so I am aware of the code of conduct)They inferred that I was a neurotic liarNice way to treat someone under going major surgery for Cancer.Maybe thats where some of the anger comes from, Back to beating the Sofa I think.Anyway writing on this forum helps keep me slightly sane: ... View more

 Hi to anyone out there. I was meant to see my plastic surgeon, but I cancelled , I wrote her a letter explaining in a polite moderated way. How the tightness and weakness is making me feelivery dispirited. I have arthritis in my spine at the level of the flap and at times  I have a lot of pain. I wrote to her because of my nature I minimise complaints and do nt really express how it makes me feel. Iasked her to please acknowledge my letter , which she did not. I do not see any point in seeing her. I know I will be the one at the disadvatage I just know there is nothing  to be done. I just so wish I had never had it done. and I struggle to see the advantages. I feel  this afternoon a huge wave of anger swirling round.  against the system. I know that is  illogical, but I cannot help  it. Probable need counselling, but at the moment more likely to want to beat the s--t out of the settee with a firm broom. Do not think of gps, chocolate and teapots come to mind,Rant over, think I will go and read a book. least with that you know you are not alone, unlike in the company of people you can be completley alone, ... View more

 Hi Soosie Soo May be  crying even though it was all lovely was, what the space of the holiday gave you the necessary time to grieve and let go. I know I went to see the nutcracker ballet in London soon after my Dad died and the beauty of the ballet made me cry, because it was such a beautiful contrast to the ugliness that surrounded  my Dads death.  So  maybe the beauty of the moment contrasted so sharply with uglines of your experience Interesting that with out regular exercise , it all becomes stiff and painful. You would have thought that in time it would be stretched and give a little  What I do nt understand is when I walk further than about half a mile my ribs become really stiff.  Has any plastic  surgeon given an explanation for this?. Apart fron exercise is there anything else that can be done., has anyone be offered anything.xxx ... View more

 Ladies I am reading the thread with great interest. My new problem postLD 12 months, is that in the last few days my arm and back is really achey, but not painful, with a sharper pain in my reconstruction,not bad enough for pain killers, but close. Any ideas suggestions. I have been doing all the usual stuff.  2. When they make a new nipple do they use a bit of the other nipple to make it. ? 3 The idea for a meet up has gone to ground seems to have fade a little, is any body still interested. I wo nt be able to make the end of the month , unless its a week end as I will be working. I am willing to arrange something still. To Susie Soo I was reading your original thread, I am wondering if there ever comes a time when you accept  the muscle lump. Is there any one out there who does think it all hunky dory, I am thinking that with the weakness, stiffness  etc etc , that i cannot see myself thinking its all ok.  I know its ungrateful, because I am "healthy" but I seem to  me that i have a residual sorrow, that  it is difficult to lift. I feel that no anti depressants or counselling will lift it. I just  wish the LD  could bugger off!!! and leave me alone.   ... View more

Hi Susie Soo I agree that it is important that BS know that replacing breasts with lumps of muscle(however skilfully applied) are not necessarily the answer to a perceived problem and that there are definite  side effects. BS need to be more realistic. Also realise that when women a recently diagnoised, for my part  I was poleaxed, so not in a position to make a  decision. It did nt seem to dawn on them that I could be in a state of shock. I looked alright , but internally I was on another planet.May be I am being hard, but for them its all in a days work, but for me it was a nightmare. Surely they would realise  that.??? They did nt seem to be aware. Personally the breast reconstruction nurse was a waste of space.    I am going away for a few days . When I come back I am going to arrange a place. Would People consider London more achievable? Let me know. ... View more

 Morning ladies i am looking at a couple of hotels, in Manchester. One is very central, the other whichi is about a mile away but looks cosier so too speak. Iam going to see if they have a quieter room where we could meet.. Iam thinking after noon tea  for refreshment,( no doubt there would be something stronger if thats what you fancied vodka:would be my choice ,For a date I thought last week in September either week day or week end, I will suss out prices. Obviously the more the merrier. cheers Bella  . Note to Pooppy.  I am nearly one year post op and today my back has decide to stiffen up, and  become uncomfortable, I took pain killers last night to make sure I slept properly, but apart from some blips my back is better, but not better.I remember running out of energy, the consultant gave me a different reason for the fatigue, every time I saw her. In other words she did not know why. Its obvious really the body is under such physical and mental stress, , so the batteries go flat   ... View more

 Hi  there  I went for my 1st post surgery mammogram today. I feel so depressed its that deva vu feeling and a reminder how awful the whole thing   was /is. I should get the results in 3 weeks or earlier..... Any way I was thinking of making some enquiries for hiring a room in a hotel  in Manchester ( that sounds a bit formal.) Maybe just choose a hotel and a date and see what happens. What does anyone think of that. I thought a day in September would be good. Bella ... View more

 hi thats rather disappointing. I would not want to meet at a hospital, if I never saw one again it would be too soon. I feel i have been conned by the system., which is thre reason it would be good to meet up with other the women who have had a LD. ... View more

 Hi Soosie soo, you keep saying all the things I am thinking. You are so right , it seems that if a women does not have breasts of any description, they do not count in society. The world is going to stop spinning?? I do not think so. I am hoping to arrange a meet up soon . It could be a start, to change  the way things are. ... View more

 Hi Jo I  was thinking that Manchester could be a good place to meet for the ladies on this thread. Would it be possible for bcc, to arrange a room , which we could hire for a small charge. Bella   ... View more

 Hi Gang ive justhad a possible good idea, why do nt we all meet up ? We could meet  if possible at a Bcc centre.I know we would  only have the LD in common, but that would be the point. It might not help, but then again it might. I am prepared to arrange it and with the heilp of bcc( To BCC I would obviously need to liason with you) It could be fun, I m sure as hell we could all do with some of that !!! Any way Im sure you will let me know . Salutations sisters. ... View more

 Hi soosie soo I totally agree with your comments, there is not enough support for post reconstruction patients. May be with a bit of lateral thinking the NHS save money and end a lot of hidden suffering. Ps if i strain my upper back my boob hurts(Operation side) and some times my other boob  hurts as well. Its never ending.!!!  Seriously could not Breast Cancer Care do a survey and investigate how big the problem is, so medical opinion could be changed. Any body have any thoughts on the matter? regards to my fellow sisters in sufference ... View more

Hi susie Soo thanks for your reply, maybe there should be a campaign NOT for immediate reconstruction, Breast Care Nurse/ Plastic Surgeonss of Britain are you by any chance listening to our experiences??? Stay stronge and positive Susie Soo, believe it will get better, we have the strength within  us to make it happen. Bella 60 ... View more

Hi I had my Ld reconstruction done in Sept 2014. When I was given the diagnosis i was so stunned i could nt seem to absorb any kind of information. So the fact that I didnt absorb the information at all, and nobody seemed to understand that I was incapable of logical thought, makes me regret deciding to have a reconstruction. I do not think there was or is enough support. I think that PS just want to make a boob, once that is made they don't really care what you think or feel. Although my lump is a good shape, its nothing like my boob and I do not like it. I too have a lot of pulling and tightness,also I am not as stronge as I was.. Saying that you will not notice a differance un less you are a rock climber is total rubbish. Although I do not wish this on any one, it is consoling to hear fom other women in the same boat, but Today I feel dispirited and also angry that i allowed myself to  be sucked into the medical opinion that immediate reconstruction is best. For whom I may ask? Certainly not for the women having the op.I soo wish I hadnt had it, so that i was as strong and fit as i was before. Rant over, I have got it off my chest(pity I cannot get my damned reconstruction off as easily!!!!)  ... View more

 thanks fizzbe. i totally agree. ... View more