Breast Cancer Care Forum

Hi Helen I was wondering how you were getting on and I’m so glad that your news was good. As Jane has said just take one day at a time and you will get through it and we will be here for you. You have already been through two invasive surgeries and done so well. I think the lymph node removal leaves you with a weird feeling underarm, sore but numb at the same time! One little exercise tip I was given was to reach up and touch the door frame every time you leave a room! Sounds a bit strange but it helps to stretch the arm and I still do it from time to time, when my arm and shoulder feel a bit tight. Love Francine x   ... View more

Glad you sorted a softie for your mum. I have to admit mine got on my nerves as she (Sally the Softie as I named her) had a life of her own! Difficult to keep in the bra because it’s light and had a habit of trying to creep up my neck, lol. In the end I used to pin it in my bra with a couple of small safety pins. The proper prosthetic is heavier and tends to stay put.  One thing I would suggest as a single big boob lady (!) is to try and wear a bra whenever comfortable, to support the other boob. I had a habit of going braless sometimes but found that I had problems with my neck and shoulder on the boob side. Putting a silk scarf or anything soft inside the bra to start with is more comfortable I found. Wishing you both all the best.  Francine c ... View more

Hi there.  Sorry to hear about your mum. It’s horrible isn’t it, when you feel so helpless. I’m a big boobed lady although only one left now I’ve had a mastectomy. I’m an H cup and had no problem getting an H cup softie and prosthetic, although it had to be ordered by the fitter. They normally come to the hospital and you arrange an appt to see them. They are very helpful and sympathetic  I think your mum should be able to get the right size but the Breast Cancer Nurse should be able to help you in this  I actually wear a sports bra from Bravissimo, who do large cup sizes as I didn’t find any of the other companies had much for the G cup plus sizes. You can order a few online and send back the ones that are no good. They are not cheap, usually around £40, but I think are worth it  Hope this helps and sending you and your mum virtual hugs.  Francine x       ... View more

Hi Silvertong I had three WLEs before my Mx and I think the burning sensation you have is the nerves in the breast coming back to life and some inflammation, which is the body’s natural reaction after any surgery. My breast was quite numb for about a week or so after the ops and then I started to get shooting, burning type pain all over it. As others have said it would be a good idea just to check in with your BCN for some advice and reassurance but I used Aloe Vera gel, kept in the fridge, but not on the incision area, which will still be healing. It was very soothing.  Take care and sending you a virtual hug   Francine x       ... View more

Hi Helen Never apologise for not replying to posts quickly. You have so much on your plate, which would be difficult enough in normal times but even worse with COVID. My daughter was in her 30s when I was diagnosed and worried from a distance, in London. But I think you’ll find that other ladies on the forum with younger children had similarly experiences to yourself. Some seemed to withdraw from the situation, others were upset and younger ones didn’t really understand what was going on. The only thing I can say is that children are remarkably resilient and seem to come to terms with things in their own way, in time. Your little one must find things difficult and it must be extremely challenging for you.  I wish you lots of luck for your surgery on Tuesday. Thank goodness you didn’t have to wait any longer, as it’s slow torture just waiting I think. I had 3 lumpectomies before the Mx and each time it was 2 weeks before I got the results. I also had a seroma after my Mx which was drained a couple of times. As Sam said, they sometimes have a habit of coming back but your body will reabsorb  it eventually.  Check in again when you feel like it.  Love Francine x ... View more

Hi Helen Just wondering how you are doing? Trying to catch up with some gardening here in windy Lincolnshire. Where abouts do you live? Love Francine x ... View more

Night time wobbles, know all about those, as I’m sure lots of ladies do as well.  It’s quite common to see people posting and replying during the night so feel free! Everything seems worse at night I think and your mind goes into overdrive.  Goodness knows how many hours of TV I watched on catch up on my phone or iPad. It’s natural for you to be going through the ‘what if’ scenarios and I would be very surprised if anyone diagnosed with BC didn’t wonder at some point how long it had been there for before diagnosis. Some tumours are fast growing and some are not so it’s a question that probably can’t be answered. You sound like a very positive person and I’m sure you will find your own way of coping and taking each day at a time  Take care Love Francine x     i   ... View more

Hi Helen.  Sorry to hear that your news wasn’t great. Fortunately I didn’t have node involvement although it was a Grade 3 invasive situation. Think they just managed to catch it in time. I didn’t opt for chemo as the onc said it was very borderline, taking my age in to account. However, a year later I had a reoccurrence under the nipple and had to have a Mx. I often wonder if I should have had chemo in the first place, so I completely understand how you feel about it.  I’m sure there will be ladies who have had a node clearance and chemo reply to you and support you. It’s so good to talk to people who have been through similar things and you will get great advice. Take care   Francine x   ... View more

Hi Helen Wishing you all the best for your results tomorrow. It’s a scary time waiting. I hated having my appts in the late afternoon as I sat all day sweating about it. I’m sure you’ll find the breast team very understanding about your scar worries and they will help you to get through it. Do you have anyone going with you? I got into the habit of writing down my questions before the appt because everything just went out of my head as soon as I got there, your brain just wants to switch off I think.  Keep us ladies posted on how you get on . We’ve all been through it before so we know just what it’s like for you, but especially with all this COVID stuff going on. Love Francine x   ... View more

Hi Helen How are you doing? Excitement of the day here was getting a tic off my cat Zak! Joint effort, daughter held him and I wielded the tweezers, he was not very impressed with it all! Ah well, strange times  It’s a very strange numb but not numb feeling isn’t it  My no boob side still feels like that after nearly 2 years  I had 3 lumpectomies on it and then the Mx so guess the nerves were well and truly trashed  I have quite a large scar, as there was a lot of boob to remove! It was quite some time before I started to massage/moisturise it  I wanted to wait for the skin to heal well so it wasn’t irritated  I used Bio Oil to start with, which was recommended to me, but didn’t really like it as it felt very oily (!)  I ended up with Aveeno moisturiser which I really liked   Some people like E45 so everyone is different.  Regarding future reconstruction, I didn’t op for this but various ladies on this site have said not to have a silicone implant done until you’ve completed radiotherapy, if you are having this, as it can cause the implant to ‘harden’    Take care, Francine 💕   l     ... View more

You are very welcome Helen. I can still remember how I felt after all my ops. The glue will gradually peel off as days go by and is generally mostly gone by day 10. I think it’s a superior closing method to stitches personally, having had both. I could have cried for England when I first came out of hospital and it just happened at the oddest times. I could have slapped all the people telling me to stay positive! Unless you’ve been through the experience no one can understand how you feel, no matter how well they mean. Just let yourself feel sad when you do. Glad your daughter is helping you out. I gather you are younger than me, I’m 67 and my daughter is 35. One thing is for sure, you will really find out who your friends are during your journey and you may be in for a surprise. Some friends just can’t deal with it very well and complete strangers can be amazingly kind. The ladies on this forum are an incredible support and you can always have a moan and a vent without any worries. I still talk to several of them that we’re diagnosed about the same time as me and we can always have a laugh and a virtual hug on the not so good days.  Love Francine 💕 ... View more

Hi Helen   Just wanted to reach out and give you a hug. What you are feeling is absolutely normal. You have very recently had a physical and emotional assault on your body and you need time to process it. I had a Mx in 2017, after 3 lumpectomies on the same breast. I also had glue and not stitches and it healed very well. At first the wound looked a bit scary and there was quite a bit of bruising. I am big breasted (H cup)  so it was a large incision. However,  you will heal quickly, amazing what the body can do. The most important thing is to rest when you need to, you will still have anaesthetic circulating so that can make you feel rubbish for days. Drink plenty of water and take painkillers regularly, even if you don’t think you need them, as they will help with the inflammation that surgery always causes. Start to do the first set of exercises very gently and don’t push yourself too hard. Remember whether you have one breast or two you are still you.  Keep in touch, especially at this very difficult time.  Love Francine 💕 ... View more

Hi ladies. I don’t have SBC thankfully, my primary was diagnosed in 2015 and I then had a recurrence in 2017, which was missed by the hospital I was then under, despite raising my concerns on two separate occasions. However, a dear friend of mine sadly died this year from mets to her liver, leaving a 9 year old and partner behind. Her symptoms were ignored by more than one GP at her practice, despite her history of invasive BC. When she was finally taken in to hospital as an emergency, they were unable to offer her any treatment, as her cancer had spread so widely. She died only 2 weeks later. Her little girl is being incredibly brave but will grow up without her mother and her partner is trying to be the best dad he can and doing a wonderful job. This is why I am supporting the campaign to make everyone more aware of SBC, especially GPS. I send all my love to all of you battling SBC, your determination is amazing. 💕 ... View more

Hi lincs_lady, wonder if you are anywhere near me, I live in Spalding? I had a right side mx in 2017 after three lumpectomies and am now considering swimming again, if I can find a mx swimming costume and prosthetic. Anyone got any suggestions for where I could buy one of these? I am very lopsided at the moment, flat on one side and J cup on the other! May have equalisation surgery on the remaining boob in the future. I have a bit of lymphodoema on the surgery side as I had quite a few nodes removed during the various surgeries, all clear thank goodness. I would say any exercise that doesn’t involve lifting heavy weights would be OK. Take things slowly to start with and see how things go. ... View more

Hello Jill and Ange! 🙌 ... View more

I had 3 lumpectomies and a mx and am a 40 H, well on one side now! I found the Doreen Delicate bras very comfy and they do the larger cups. The cups are soft. If you look on line you can pick them up for about £20. Good luck with your treatment, just take a day at a time. Francine ... View more

Hi Appletree Glad your surgery went OK, did you find the pillow on the journey back useful?! Like you, I can’t take morphine, codeine or Fentanyl as they lower my blodd pressure and I pass out. I managed thro my three WLEs and mx with paracetamol and ibuprofen when needed but wasn’t in extreme pain at any time. I also have ME and have battled it for many years. I was borderline for chemo as altho my nodes were clear, it was a Grade 3 invasive cancer and highly ER+. I took the decision not to have the chemo after discussing it with the onc. They will probably use a computer model to give you an idea of how having or not having chemo may affect your life expectancy over 5 and 10 yrs. In my case it would only improve my chances by 2% and I was more likely to die of old age (I was 62 when diagnosed in 2015). Because of the ME and a bowel problem I also had the onc agreed that the SEs may well outweigh the benefits. You may have had the Oncotype test too but it wasn’t available on the NHS at that time. I’m sure your onc will have a good discussion with you about chemo but at the end of the day it is your decision. Try to take each day at a time but I know only too well how hard the waiting is. Sending hugs, Francine ... View more

Well another forum member told me about the cushion and boy did it come in useful. OH decided to take the quickest route home but hadn’t considered that it was littered with speed humps! That was interesting to say the least, lol. Do your post op exercises religiously but gently to start with. One tip I got was to reach up and touch the frame of the door every time you go through one. Looks a bit bonkers to others but is a good stretch for the underarm snb area too. X Francine ... View more

Hi ladies. I don’t post on this forum very often now but just wanted the pre op ladies all the best. I was diagnosed in Jan 15 and had 3 lumpectomies and snb, followed by rads. None of the ops were a bad experience and I needed virtually no pain relief, only took the odd paracetamol. I can remember how nervous I was before the first op, which happened to be on my birthday! No sleep at all the night before and thick fog on the early morning drive to the hospital made me a wreck by the time I got there. One thing I would say is to make sure the person picking you up by car brings a cushion for you, so the seatbelt isn’t right on your chest. Sending you virtual hugs, Francine. ... View more