I really feel for you. I’m currently feeling butchered also 1.5 boobs and one kidney now. And an abdomen that has been inflated, punctured and had robot arms fiddling with it. Bits are numb, bits are a weird shape. It’s so much to adjust to, especially having had a lifetime of problems with body image prior to this.
I am lucky to be alive and to live somewhere where my amazing treatment hasn’t cost me all my money ever. I’m lucky I have brilliant friends and family. I am very, very sad about what has happened to my body though.
Our oncology service has psychology as part of it, and I’ve just started seeing someone. I hope I can work through this too. I hope you’ve got access to something similar where you are.