Hello
i joined BCC in 2008 when I was 22 years old, having just had a mastectomy and had started hormone therapy.
I I have a long family history of BC and was under a genetic consultant at the time of my diagnosis and was lucky to have caught the little bugger almost straight away, stage and grade 1, ER+.
Lots has happened over the years, I’ve ‘grown up’! Found the love of my life ten years ago, bought my own house, great job, engaged and I now have a beautiful baby daughter who has literally made my life.
in June last year my dad died from pancreatic cancer, it was a long Illness and expected but heartbreaking, but as I was pregnant I had the baby to focus on. When I was37 weeks pregnant I found a lump in my collar bone, I had to go for an ultrasound and it was just an inflamed lymph node so that was a relief. A couple of months after my daughter was born I found a lump in my armpit, which turned out to be a fatty lump. Now due to just having a bit of a check up my ALT liver results are showing abnormally high and I literally am bricking it.
I’ve become an emotional and nervous wreck and I keep thinking that it’s going to come back and I’m going to leave my baby without a mum, and I had to live without my mum as she died of BC when I was four. The dr said that I need to go for a scan but has tried to reassure me that it’s probably nothing but I can’t help thinking the worst. I’ve always tried to be positive when it comes to BC but I’m struggling - I’m sick if it consuming everything; my daughter is six months old and I’ve had three scares during that time and I’m becoming exhausted by it. If it turns out to be ok I think I’m going to go counselling - my friends and family don’t understand, not really and just tell me to be positive, it’s 11 years on etc etc. I feel like I’m starting to develop anxiety, it’s prob a mixture of everything that’s happened and continues to, I just want some peace.
Sorry to go on, I found this forum so comforting when I was in the midst of my diagnosis and some years after, it’s nice to vent to people who understand.
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Hi mairead
So sorry to read that you’re struggling right now. Bc sadly never goes away totally in our thoughts and any abnormality that occurs, we will always think the worst. However, the last couple of scares that you’ve had, turned out to be nothing, and let’s hope this one will be too. My daughter recently had a high reading on her liver, but on a second blood test it then resolved itself. Doctors will always double check things just to be on the safe side because of our history.
I wish you all the best and let us know how you get on.
Sue xx
Hello Mairead,
I am so sorry to hear that you are going through such a difficult time at the moment. The trouble is you can do nothing else but face it head on and go through the recommended scans and tests. I was diagnosed in Sept 2016 and have already been through 2 recurrence scares (bone and mastectomy site).
Irrespective of your outcome, I think you are right in trying counselling to assist you in managing thoughts and feelings before they end up overwhelming you. Hopefully you have a Maggies type centre or other support centre where you can access services timeously. It can be easier and more productive talking to people we do not have a personal relationship with.
Forgive my clumsy expression if the following comes over patronising. Wow - what a lot you have been through at such a young age. To have had BC and undergone mastectomy and treatment at 22 - then to have successfully got on with your life as you have is admirable in my opinion. Just hold on to that tenacity, resolve and the beautiful things in your life like your daughter and the love you have, to try and keep the demon thoughts at bay.
I hope you let us know how things go for you.
Wishing you all the best,
Chick x
Hello
thank you you so much everybody for your comments and concern. I’m happy to say that I’ve got gall stones which have been tinkering with the blood results! I’ve never been so relieved; I was really really worried this time.
Blinking cancer! ??
Hello everyone.
I am sure I posted but it hadn’t appeared in my comments for some reason. Thank you all so much for your comments and concern; I’m happy to say that I’ve got gall stones which has interfered with the blood tests! Phew!!
I was truly scared this time. I hate cancer ???
There was a problem with posting my comments now they’re all there! ??♀️??♀️