Good luck, sorry to hear you have to wait so long. The waiting is agony isn’t it.
Really hope it’s good news.
Take care, love and hugs. Debbie. xx
Hey Hayz
hope it’s something normal - like you’ve just broken your collarbone and hadn’t noticed. Lol - the things we wish for!
Fingers crossed that it’s nothing too bad, particularly after all the chemo hell you’ve had.
lots of love
Helen.
Met with my onc again today…I have a recurrance in 1 (possibly 2) nodes in my neck.
…left me feeling like a ticking time bomb!!
I’m only 2/8 for hormone receptors, but want to throw everything I can at this, so I started Tamoxifen today. Even if it’s only half a percent effective it’ll be worth it!
Plan at the moment is to continue with rads, meeting with my onc weekly to monitor the nodes, then another CT scan 4-6 weeks after finishing to see where we’re at…then wait!!! AAARGH!!
Thats gonna be a nightmare. Unless there’s further spread or the nodes increase in size they do NOTHING!! Zilch! Because I’m triple negative. I feel as if I’m gonna be sitting just waiting for it to spread before we do anything!!
Sorry to be so depressing ladies, but I’m still in shock at it coming back so quickly…I just wish it was somewhere they could remove it, rather than in my lymph nodes!
I’m obviously a little bit terrified & teary at the moment. It’s a lot to get your head round!
Love to all
Hxx
Hiya Hayz
Just read about what is happening with yourself at the moment. Just to let you know that I’m thinking of you and sending lots of warm hugs and kisses.
Please take care
Love Krissy xx
Hi Hayz It’s so hard to know what to say, just know I’m thinking of you and hoping that things will turn out OK.
I’m going through a recurrence, the chemo is all I can have now, but we must keep positive and look to the future, no matter how hard it is, we’ve come so far we’ll not let the Bxxxxxd beat us love Kathxxxx
Hope everyone else is bearing up
love Kath xxx
Bloody hell, nightmare - you’ve every right to be teary n freaked by that kind of news. Just wish I could say something that would give you some comfort. There’s me banging on about getting back to normal and you still fighting the fight. Even though you’re miles away, I’ve come to learn that you’re a tough little egg, and that you will give this thing a really good run for it’s money…you just have to do a bit more beating up the baddie than we do.
I say just, but that really is a hell of an ask isn’t is?
The one and only thing we can do is be there for you, and that, we are.
Thinking of you Hazel and sending you lots of love - in fact sending you all some love - cos if you’re feeling like me you’ll be feeling a bit wobbly (to say the least) at the news 
xxx
Hi Hayz,
Just lost everything I wrote, b****y internet.
Ditto really what Loocie just said, in fact she put it a lot better than I did!!!
We are definitely here for you Hayz, all of us.
Sending you lots of love,
Jane xx
Thanks everyone for the support…it really means a lot!
I’m really pleased for you all coming to the end of treatment. I’m still holding on the teeny tiny chance that rads’ll blast the wee buggers into oblivion & I can go on my merry way! Well, I can dream!! :o)
love to everyone
I’m off to bed…today’s been a long one!
Hxx
Hazel,
Like the others I don’t know what to say except to echo the words of the others. I can’t imagine how you have been feeling recently - to get through all that bloody chemo and then be told this!!
Can’t they remove the lymph node and zap the area after?
I have got to know you over the last few months and I know that you have a great sense of humour and a determined spirit so please use all your courage to beat this…as I’m sure you will.
Sending you lots of love, hugs and positivity. You will be in my thoughts and prayers tonight and every night until I hear some good news.
Lynn (((((((((((((((((xxxxxxxxxxxxxx))))))))))))))))))
Hi Hazel,
Im really sorry to hear about your results, I know we were all hoping it would be ok for you.
I also have a recurrence in the lymph nodes in my neck (supra-clavicular) so know how devastated you are. But admittedly I had 4 years from my initial diagnosis, I cant begin to imagine how id have felt if it had recurred just after my chemo finished 4 years ago.
Hope you sleep well tonight,
Lots of Love to you,
K x
Hi Hazel
so sorry that you’ve had this bad news after your wait last week. Is there a reason they can’t remove the lymph nodes? It makes you wonder how the little buggers got through the chemo hell - lets hope the rads zap them completely.
You must be very upset at the moment, what with coping with chemo and then the elephant arm and now this - how much hell does one person have to suffer? Sending you big hugs and positive thoughts along with everyone else - we are all thinking of you.
I think it just highlights how we should make the most of the life we have and not just sit around putting things off, none of us know what is around the corner. I hope you get your trip to the US that you missed last year as something to look forward to in the next few months.
lots of love
Helen.
Hi Hazel
I just wanted to say that i am thinking of you at the moment, you must be in shock to say the least…xx
I really hope rads do the trick for you, ireally do…and there is be banging on about my bald head and wee going in all directions!
Please take care and let us know how you are doing.
Hugs…Naz x
HI Hayz
Just caught up on your results and totally understand how you must be feeling. Can’t really add anything to what all the others have said. However I am thinking of you, and sending you my love and adding you to my prayers. Hopefully ongoing treatment will sort it all out for you.
Hope all you other ladies are keeping ok.
Love to all
Babs xx
Hi Ladies,
How is everyone??? We’ve all gone a bit quiet. Hayz I’m sure we are all wondering how you are getting on?
I am three weeks into Tamoxifen now and the only problems so far are lots of hot flushes which are warmer than they used to be before BC and an increase in having to use the loo. I am now getting up every night sometime twice!!
I am also two days into rads, I have to have a cover put over my mx area which will be used for half the treatments I think to help my skin a bit but does not reduce the effect of the machine. Its clever stuff isn’t it??
Hope you are all well,
Love to you all,
Jane xx
Hi Jane,
Good luck with the rest of Rads. 22 down for me just 1 to go, Yay!! I have found Rads fine compared to chemo. A little tired but not too bad - think that’s probably down to a 60 mile round trip each day! And skin holding out quite well too. I haven’t heard of the ‘cover’ thing - wasn’t offered it, so maybe they don’t use them, not sure.
Hope everyone else is doing ok at the moment.
Lynn x
Hi Lyn,
I thought it was bad enough having 15 rads, I’ve only had 4 and the journey every day is already getting to me, also about 60 miles!! Lay under the machine yesterday being zapped and couldn’t stop the tears. Felt a right wally and came out of the room with big red eyes. Sobbed all the way home and most of the evening. Told the girls there today to be horrible to me so when they put the cover on me they stuck it over my arm and down the side so I couldn’t move. I think they were going to leave me there all afternoon. Well I did say not to be nice!! I think I get the cover which is like a large jiffy bag because I had a mastectomy and don’t have a lot of skin there. Hopefully it means I won’t get too sore but who knows??
Hope you are all ok,have a good weekend,
Love to you all,
Jane xx
Hi Jane,
Even though it’s easier than chemo it’s still very emotional isn’t it? Hope you are feeling a little better now.
I had a weepy day on Wednesday - went to have another of my blasted cysts aspirated (other side) and guess what they found another lump. I freaked out initially. They called the consultant in to double check it and they are pretty sure it’s a fibrotic benign lump. I am now thinking what with my previous misdiagnosis I hope they are right!! I was on my own and had to go straight to radiotherapy after the aspiration and promptly burst into tears in front of the radiographers. Think I was just so shocked that they found another lump.
Are you on the IMPORT high trial? - the ladies that are having option 1 + 2 are having 15 rads. I’m on the trial but was randomly chosen for standard treatment which is 23 zaps.
Have a good and happy weekend.
Lynn xx
Hey Everyone
…we have gone quiet, haven’t we?
I think that’s a good sign tho…means everyone is starting to get back to ‘normal’ & getting on with life…fantastic!
First up…Lynn! What’s happening with you? Hope you’re ok!
I should have finished my rads yesterday, but my onc has added 5 boosters to my lumpy neck to blast the wee buggers! First one today…I have the most fetching pen marks on my neck, covered with the biggest bit of that fake skin type stuff you have ever seen!..that’s gonna hurt when it comes off! LOL
I’ve been meeting my onc weekly since I noticed the lump & she’s been keeping a close eye on it. I swear it’s tripled in size, but she doesn’t agree…& she even gave me a wee glimmer of hope yesterday as I left!!..I had mentioned that it didn’t feel as huge & scary yesterday as it had done & she said ‘I can see why you think it feels less prominent’!!..not much I know, but it put a wee smile on my face!!
To be honest I had a couple of weeks where I felt like my world had come crashing down on me…it’s so much worse than when you’re diagnosed with Primary!! But now I’ve kinda got my head round it & I’m just ignoring the fact that it’s there. I can’t do anything about it & I’d drive myself nuts if I kept poking & prodding & trying to guess if it’s grown!
I finish my rads on Thursday & then I’ll have a CT scan 5 weeks later…then I stress waiting for the results!!
If they are no larger than the original 10mm & 14mm then we sit tight…if they’ve grown…chemo…if they’ve shrunk/dissapeared…Party at mine!!! PMSL!
My big fear really now is my headaches…could be stress…here’s hoping! My onc thinks it’s that combined with my lack of fluid intake. How on earth can anyone drink the recommended amount?? I’m rubbish…3 cups of tea & a drink of water with my dinner & that’s me!..must try harder! ;o)
Anyway, How are you all getting on with the Tamoxifen??
Although I only scored ER 2/8 we chatted about it & decided to give Tamox a try. I’ve had no side effects at all, other than the odd bout of creaky knees at bed time!
Some of the girls at the Younger Womens Forum were complaining of horrible side effects…funny how we’re all effected differently!
Well…I’m off to hand my Willow Foundation forms to my BCN…a nice wee trip for the kids would be great. My 10 year old’s struggling knowing that my cancer hasn’t all gone yet (I couldn’t lie to him when he asked what the marks were for!)
Hope You are all well
Take Care
Hayz xxxxx
Hi Ladies
Haz good to hear from you, been thinking of you and glad things might not be as bad, keep your chin up hard though it is, I wish you all the best.
2 more cycles to go for me April & May can’t believe how the time has gone. Bit
How’s everyone else doing well I hope.
I’ve got chemo head as you’ll all have had so unless I make a note before I start I can’t remember who’s what but all you rad’s, toxafin ladies good luck and newer ladies luck to you as well
Take care
love Kath
hi Hayz
i hope your extra rads blasts it to buggery! or at the very least shrinks it… glad your starting to get your head around it abit more too… has your onc referred you to the psychs? might be useful just to chat things through. i saw a really nice one called beatta last friday and today just to discuss my issues… she discharged me today and said i was normal… me? normal? LOL
im not having any side effects from the tamox either hazel… the majority of people dont have side effects, but those who do have them are more likely to tell you about them than a whole thread of people saying im on tamoxifen and great. LOL.
i keep poking and prodding my new wee lumpy bit too but im sure its absolutely nothing or my onc would have sent me for a scan asap instead of giving me a routine appt through the post… im probably making it bigger by all the poking it gets.
see you on sunday xxx