1st post so worried

Posted on behalf of new user Patricia:

Hi I was told on the 20th of December 2011, that I had breast cancer. Since then I have been so sick, and felt nausea, and completely not hungry. I am so tired in the day, and dread the night time when I can’t sleep.
My operation is on the 20th January and I can now feel a pulling feeling in my breast and very breathless when I go for a 100 yard walk

Hello Patricia,
so sorry to read that you have had a breast cancer diagnosis - this is the club no-one wants to join, but by joining these forums you will find encouragement and support. What you are describing sounds remarkably normal to those of us who’ve walked this path before you - fear, anger, numbness, shock… they are all quite natural reactions to this horrid news. And the waiting - we all hate that more than anything else.

Just to (hopefully) encourage you, I am now 16 months post diagnosis, have completed treatment and have been back at work full time since last April. I call by here from time to time to support others and catch up with the friends I’ve made along the way.

You don’t mention what support you have - I live alone and am fiercely independent but have been very glad of the practical support of one or two people who I chose to allow in, especially after my surgery.

If you look around the main Breast Cancer Care website you will find some really helpful leaflets you can download, or you might want to join one of the forum ‘threads’ for people having surgery in January. Be careful which threads you pick - you can scare yourself unecessarily; mostly people don’t post to say things are going well, so remember you often find the concerns expressed more than the ‘good’ stuff.

I hope you find the forums helpful. When I first started posting I was learned there are two ‘golden rules’ we give to new people…

  1. There is no such thing as a silly question - if you need to ask it, it isn’t silly. Sometimes it is easier to ask on here than to ask a doctor or nurse (though hopefully you will find good support from your breast nurse)

  2. Do not google. A lot of stuff out there is out of date, not applicable in the UK or just plain old fashioned wrong. Stick with BCC, MacMillan or Cancer Research UK and you should be OK.

I expect you have also noticed that the news and every soap on TV is full of references to cancer… we all notice this, and it can be upsetting, but don’t let it get to you - you will get through this.

Lastly, we like cyber hugs on here - so I am sending you one, which you can use now, or save for a time when you need it.

<<HUG>>

Hi honey

I was dx last November and have trudged through chemo, SNB, full axilla clearance, a mastectomy + recon and rads. Phew!

The way you feel is completely normal and I promise that once things get moving you’ll feel better. It’s really scary but from somewhere you’ll find some strength to get through it.

It might be an idea to go and get some sleeping pills - I did. The gps tend to be reluctant to give them out but if you explain that it’s just to give you some well needed rest you’ll probably find that they’ll give you enough for a week. They really helped me, just knowing that I could completely zonk out made me feel better.

It might help if you use this time to think of questions about your treatment and to make sure you’re happy with how it’s going. I asked if I could have certain things in a certain order, got 2nd opinions and asked for lots of advice from the lovely ladies on here.

Right now it’s terrifying but it will pass and it will not be as scary as you think.
Take Heart xxx

Am in same boat as you Patricia and will know on Thursday when the op is and more details. Feel time has stood still and like you have been very scared. One of the best things I did was phone the help line on here. I spoke last week to a lady, don’t even know her name, who was brilliant and really helped to talk through these emotions and fears. Its also great to hear from the 2 ladies on your post and thik this may be the worst bit, the waiting and worrying. Hope you can find some calm and rest.
We’ll get through this!!!