29 and new to this - let's not like 2012 together ;)

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Hi girls,

I was diagnosed 2 weeks ago and had a lumpectomy and lymph node removal surgery 5 days ago. I am aching and can barely sleep. Something good came out of this - I found you all!

My most immediate fears right now are:

  • The lamparoscopic surgery I’ll get done probably this week to preserve part of an ovary in case I get chemo.

  • The thought of not being able to have babies, ever.

And at a much lower level, I can’t help but feel a slight fright that makes me feel a bit guilty (on top of it, ha!). And it’s the responsible side of my brain telling me they need me at work! I know it’s time to take care of myself, but it was gonna be a busy month at work and I’m having a hard time not thinking about it. It’s all so been so quick, so there’s hardly been time to transition.

Aaaand, a few lines of writing later, I feel a little lighter. I’ve only just discovered this placed and I’m already thrilled. It looks like a gigant cosy warm (pink!) pillow stuffed with inspiration and courage.

Wishing you a great Sunday, ladies.

Carmy

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Hi honey. I faced 2011 in a similar way. I was 30, and I had neoadjuvant chemo, then a lumpectomy and node clearance, then rads.

I have 2 children - they were 8 mths and 2.5 at the time - and although I always wanted more I decided that I just needed to have the treatment and ‘what will be will be’ with respect to the future. VERY different for me as I already had 2 I realise - and I know how lucky I am that I had them before this.

Anyway - what I wanted to say was that I missed one period due to chemo and surgery. Just one!! So it didn’t affect my fertility at all. Being younger does mean you are more likely to remain fertile.

I still get aches and pains from the lymph node clearance - I still sleep on the side affected to kind of ‘splint’ it all.

Wishing you all the best with all of this honey xxxx

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Carmy, first of all, have lots of soft warm cuddly hugs. This is a horrible place to be, and hugs are always good.

I’m a bit older than you and have had my children, but there are others who have had BC and went on to have children who still post on here, so it IS possible. I’m sure they’ll be along soon to give you some good news personally.

As for work, I know what you mean. Being dragged kicking and screaming from normal life onto the roller coaster that is BC is a helluva shock that turns us upside down. But consider this: what would work do if you’d been hit by a bus? THEY’D COPE. So treat BC like a bus that’s hit you and don’t bother with the guilt.

YOU are the most important thing at the moment, and YOU are the person that needs to be cared for and looked after.

Anyway, just enjoy the hugs and others will be along with some practical stuff.

CM
x

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Hi Carmy

Firstly, welcome to the forums, I am sure you will find it a great source of information and support.

I’m sorry to read of your diagnosis, the first few days and weeks are always difficult when coming to terms with things and getting to grips with your treatment plans, etc.

As well as the support you are receiving on the forums you might find it helpful to order the BCC resources pack. It has been specifically designed for those newly diagnosed and contains information to help you better understand your diagnosis, test results and the various treatments available. If you would like to order a copy just follow the link bellow:-

www2.breastcancercare.org.uk/publications/diagnosed-breast-cancer/resource-pack-primary-early-breast-cancer-bcc145

Also, do give the helpline a ring if you need any further support or information. They’re on 0808 800 6000. Open 9-5 Monday to Friday and 9-2 Saturday.

Best wishes Sam, BCC Facilitator

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Thank you for the warm welcome, ladies. :slight_smile:

Sam, the resources pack looks grat, I’m definitely downloading a few. Thank you for pointing them out to me.

CM, sending lots of soft warm cuddly hugs back. You words about how I really should not care about work have really clicked so THANK YOU. :* They’ll cope. Of course they will. Meanwhile, I’ll be taking lots of care of myself. :slight_smile:

Manny, I’m sorry to hear what 2011 must have been for you. I hope you have been sble to recover reasonably well and can enjoy your time with your kids to the fullest now. It IS really reassuring to know that you missed just one period during chemo, wow. So there are chances… Still, as advised by my doctor, it is very likely that this week I’ll go through lamparoscopic surgery to get part of my ovarian crust removed and frozen, just of be on the safe side (I’m terrified about the surgery). But from what you say, it might not even be necessary to use it in the future. Thanks a lot for sharing how it’s been for you - it has given me more hope! And I hope the aches from the surgery fade for you at some point. :*

Wishing you all a good week and thans for taking the time to reply.

Carmy xxx

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Hi Carmy,

Sorry to see you join us. I had same surgery on 7th Feb (same day as you ?). I came home Friday night after 2nd drain was removed.

I can’t comment on your lamparoscopic surgery as nobody has mentioned that to me as I am older (43) - although could still have more kids but don’t plan to.

I just know that many many woman go on to continue to be fertile and have their normal cycles return after chemo so I hope that’s the case for you :wink:

How are you getting on since surgery. Are you doing your exercises :wink:

I made the mistake of stopping ALL pain relief the minute I left the hospital and then found my arm (mainly the inside of the forearm) was painful to touch on every single part of it. Last night I took an anti inflammatory and a paracetomol and today the difference is amazing (just the elbow area on both sides that tingles like mad) so I am going to take anti inflammatory morning and night and pain killers 3 times a day now.

I found the hardest exercise is the one when you try and put your arm behind your back as if you are pulling up or down a zip. Was quite shocked how restricted the movement was as not used to having to slow down. Other shock was the “blues”. I had been very strong until the day after surgery and now regularly have a good cry - but I am told it’s very normal.

I hope you recover quickly and roll on Xmas 2012 when we will all be fighting fit and desperate to see the end of this year !

Manny - are we supposed to sleep on the affected side after a node clearance ? I remember someone saying that they were trying to avoid it but I haven’t read anything about what the “rules” are.

Angie

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Hi Angie,

Wow, yes, we are surgery buddies, we both had it last Tuesday. We’ve made it! I was sent home Thursday as I didn’t have any drains. Did you have an okay weekend?

And wow again at what you mention at the inside of the forearm. I stop taking painkillers yeserday and today I felt unconfortable in that area. It got worse this evening after taking my first proper full ‘normal’ shower after surgery, cause then the area got so itchy and sensible. It’s especially the back of the forearm. It burns when it touches my clothes, yet it looks normal… I’ve just taken a pain killer and hope it fades. I haven’t been told anything about taking anti inflammatory but maybe just like you I should get some in.

I wish you a super speedy recovery too. And omg, totally, roll on he end of the year when we’ll both be hopefully done with this.

Do you have any doctor appointments this week? And do you know yet which treatment you’ll get? I’ll know mine next week. Would love to stay in touch with you.

Carmy xx

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Oh, Angie, I seem to have skipped a paragraph of yours I wanted to reply to. Which exercises are you doing? Are they available online? I’m only doing the ones to be found here, but I still haven’t done any back ones:

www2.breastcancercare.org.uk/sites/default/files/Getting%20fitter,%20feeling%20stronger%20leaflet%20%28exercises%20after%20surgery%29.pdf

And sorry to hear about the blues. I somehow seem to have gone stronger after surgery and was having my good cries more often before surgery. I’ve also been told it’s very normal to feel the blues after surgery, though. It might take some days, but I’m sure soon you’ll build up and feel more in control again. xx

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Hi Carmy, thanks for the link.

I was given a photocopied leaflet that has been created by our local Breast Care Unit. It seems to have 2 more exercises on it for the first 7 day period.

One of them is the Exercise 4 shown on the link (for Weeks 2 onwards) and the other was simply trying to put your arm behind your back (but keeping it low down so the hand is at the bottom of your spine) and then gently trying to move the hand up your back slightly as if you are trying to pull a zip up.

I found the zip one incredibly hard at first and couldn’t move my hand up very far - so don’t push it. I’m not convinced it’s necessary to do it in the first 7 days as it’s much easier now - and we are now only on 6 clear days since surgery.

I’m surprised they didn’t give you any anti inflammatory tablets. I was given a pack of 28 Diclofenac 50mg and I’d highly recommend them. I only take 1 after breakfast and 1 after evening dinner as they can irritate the stomach and I don’t like to feel drugged up at all :wink:

I also take 1 paracetomol 3 times a day. I’ve found that movement has been easier and I only really have a tingly/numbness that bothers me in the actually elbow area - like you’ve hit the funny bone constantly.

I like to think that it’s all good pain as it’s the muscles and nerves reconnecting.

I hopefully get my results from the Operation tomorrow - and will know if they got a good clear margin and how many lymph nodes were affected. I was told it would take 10 days for the results so I hope I don’t get there tomorrow and find she doesn’t know anything yet.

You are lucky to escape the drains and be able to shower already ! Sounds bliss. I am feeling a scruffy mess now but if they give the all clear on the wounds tomorrow then I might wallow in a big bubble bath :wink:

Let us know how your results go next week.

Angie xx

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Hi Angie,

Thanks for pointing out to the exercises I haven’t been doing. We’re now one week in, so time to try them out! Glad you’re finding the zip up one much easier now. Can you believe I wasn’t given any exercise info and have only been doing them cause I found them on here? Too glad I found you all.

My dear boyfriend has gone out to buy some anti inflammatory tablets now. Let’s see if I find any difference. And that’s a good way of looking at it, the weird feeling we are getting might be the right kind of weird, of things working and coming alive again, so to speak. Can you feel the back part of your forearm? Like, the opposite part of the biceps? I can’t at all. It’s weird.

I’ll be thinking of you tomorrow. I hope they give you the results. There’s a chance they might not have them if they said 10 days, but these things are always approximate as we all know. Do let us know how it goes once you’re back. I’m sure it’ll go well and they’ll confirm how much of a success the op was. :slight_smile:

The shower… can you believe I have actually been regretting it all day? The feeling during it was really really unconfortable, like the whole surgery area got some extra weight and got too tender. I also sensed how some areas are still insensible. Then I dried it carefully with the hairdrier as suggested by the doctor and I got the feeling I couldn’t get it to properly dry. And I’ve been getting weird skin feelings, as if the skin was burning, ever since. So, I don’t know what the rules are, but I would say don’t rush it. I was also dreaming of the time I could treat myself with a bubble bath again, but after last night I thing I’ll skip it until the wounds are more healed.

Sending many hugs, calm and determined vibes for tomorrow. It’ll go well. :slight_smile: :*

Carmy xxx

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(((hugs))) ladies.

Can I just say don’t feel disheartened if your arm is pretty useless ATM. I remember doing those exercises in the first few weeks after surgery and being so annoyed - but I pretty much have normal shoulder movement now. Not quite as much strength as I did - but almost normal really.

Loss of sensation over the armpit and back of the arm is normal after an axillary dissection. Also over the scar area. My sensation loss is not as bad as some (as my surgeon tried to move nerves rather than cut through them), but even 6 mths on I still have areas that are totally numb. I even managed to cut myself with an electric shaver the first time I shaved my armpits after surgery as I just can’t feel anything there!!

I think I had my first bath about 12 days after surgery.

Anti-inflammatories is a good idea.

Good luck for the results tomorrow. I remember waiting for them so very clearly.

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Manny, thanks for the hugs. Glad to hear you’re having pretty much normal shoulder movement. That must be so great, especially as you have young kids (also if you didn’t, but you know what I mean!). I am a regular swimmer so I was wondering if I’d be able to get full arm movement back so as to keep swimming, but I guess little by little I’ll get there. First I’ll think of the next bath, then I’ll think of the next swimming-pool. :wink:

By the way, what stage are you at now, treatment-wise? Hope you’re quite okay. :*

And oh my, I can really see myself with a cut or two the first time I shave myself too, hehe. I’ll try to have extra care.

Angie, with you in mind today, sweetie!

Carmy xxx

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I finished my primary treatment in August - chemo was first, then surgery, then rads. So for now I am well. I have triple negative BC so no longer on any treatment at all.

I do a fair amount of swimming now - breast stroke is no problem but I do find back/front crawl hard going. I can do it - but not well and not for long. I think I will try doing some more swimming with a float so that I can vary the style without using difficult arm movements so much. Where there is a will there is a way with all these sort of things!!

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Omg, I am thrilled to see you are on no treatment any more! You are such an inspiration. Very happy for you, Manny. :slight_smile:

And it makes me happy too that you can do your swimming. ope I can be there soon.

When there is a will there is a way indeed. :)))

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Hi Carmy, sorry for the delay in posting back.

Well I had the results and officially they have “got it” and therefore no further surgery and moving on to Chemo, however it wasn’t completely clear cut and I didn’t walk out feeling elated in the way I had hoped.

Basically whilst I was under they used a portable X-Ray / Scanner to check that they have got clear margins (which failed for 45 mins and therefore made my Op a total of 5.5 hrs). Anyway they didn’t get clear margins and had to keep going back and taking further “shavings” until they appeared to have taken enough - and those shavings have come back to show that they managed to get the minimum of 1mm around the area EXCEPT for the deep margin (the area behind the lump that goes to the chest wall).

Apparently my lump was deeper than they had expected (why !? - they had plenty of scans etc to see it ?) Anyway, it went right up to the chest wall and she removed all she could without actually taking any muscle away. The “margin” she got from that area was only 0.1mm - so a 10th of a millimetre (can you imagine how small that is ?) and therefore well below their “minimum” margin.

I didn’t get to see my surgeon initially because they’d double booked her and there was 2 of us ladies waiting 1.5 HOURS ! in the waiting room because they were so late and then discovering we had the same time slot. So I had a young (looked 15 yrs old) registrar tell me the results and the surgeon didn’t come into the room until it had all been discussed. I now wish I’d got her to explain it because I think he was very factual and scary.

Anyway, I have to focus on the fact that for now they think they “got it” and she did say that the chest wall looked fine - so no reason to think it’s gone there and that she couldn’t take any more tissue anyway. Apparently Chemo followed by Rads will nuke the whole area anyway.

I am delighted that no further surgery is required because I just don’t like this being ill lark. All though the homecooked meals that friends and family have supplied since this all started has been amazing and I will miss that when this is all over LOL.

Hope you are feeling OK and getting movement back in your arm. I have the numb area on the back of my arm as well but constantly massage it with Aqueous cream to try and de-sensitize it. :wink:

Then had 2 days of MEGA PAIN and seemed to hit a real low. Think going braless one night was a very very bad idea or maybe the scar was just tightening up because it was healing. Whatever the reason I was in more pain than ever before and a swollen area in armpit immediately behind the scar area feels rock hard and uncomfortable. I’ve now discovered that I can’t fully straighten my arm and if I try it feels like it’s going to snap.

Hate feeling restricted and praying this all eases very soon - and well before chemo as would be horrible if couldn’t reach the top cupboard for a sick bowl !

Had much better day today though so thinking the old “worse before it gets better” saying could be true.

I haven’t braved showers yet as Surgeon said to only put clean soap free water on the area still as top of scar (nearest armpit) is still red. I went to my son’s hairdressers to get his hair cut and she gave my hair and wash and blow dry for free :slight_smile: