29 year old with pre chemo nerves

Hello!

 

It’s taken me a while to build the courage to register and post.

 

I’d just turned 29, was on honeymoon in December and found a lump. After convincing the Doctors to refer me for biopsy and waiting for Xmas to pass, I was diagnosed with Grade 3 ER positive BC on 9th January. I was booked in for right sided masectomy on 14th February, but they found a second lump in the week before. This turned out to be grade 3 triple negative. 

 

I had egg collection for IVF last week and had the last injections yesterday (we were just about to start a family when all this happened).

 

I had a CT scan yesterday, provided this comes back ok, I start chemo on 20th March. It will be 12 weekly sessions followed by 4 fortnightly sessions. Then radiotherapy, potential hormone tablets and then preventative surgery for the left side (I have the BRCA gene)

 

I’ve tried to be super positive this whole way through, but just now find myself in an emotional mess. I’m scared, panicked and just don’t know what to expect from the chemo. I have IBS and they have warned that chemo finds your weakness - i’m anticipating i’ll be in a bit of a mess physically, but just don’t know how to get my head into a better mindset as i feel i need to be stronger mentally for this next bit. 

 

My husband is trying his best, but i’m conscious I don’t want to upset him by him seeing me not coping. 

 

I suppose (after a very rambly post) I was just wondering if there were any other folks out there who could share their experience of chemo as well as any coping mechanisms?

 

Much Love & sorry for the essay x

Hello, I understand how you feel. So many things rushing through your mind and also worrying about how your husband is coping with your diagnosis. It certainly is a shock.

It’s good that you are thinking positive thoughts and don’t be scared to talk to your friends and family about how you are feeling as communication is very important. We all need a release valve and we all have our moments when we  are upset and angry “why me”.  

When I was diagnosed with breast cancer 7 years ago , I was like you and didn’t know what to expect. I just wanted to get treatment asap and move on with my life.

 You have to have faith in your Drs and ask questions if you don’t understand something. If you don’t have a regular GP, I recommend you get one as in between seeing your specialists, a good GP is very important, They are someone who will listen to you and advise you on all things from mental health and coping mechanisms to your everyday health problems, or even just a chat.

 

I tried to not let my diagnosis take over my mind completely so I continued to meet up with friends and family and watched my favourite series on tv etc. I tried to be as normal as possible in my day to day life. You don’t just stop living and not enjoying your life. Try to keep busy but rest when you need to. Read supportive and inspiring books.

 

The oncology nurses are terrific and will explain everything to you as they treat you. Intravenous chemo can takes a few hours to do so take your iPad or magazine.  A friend can also accompany you which is a good idea, especially for the first time.

After about 3 days , I started to feel the affects of the chemo. I wasn’t nauseous like many people experience (make sure you have anti nausea tablets on hand)  I felt very tired and irritable. My taste buds changed and didn’t know what I wanted to eat. Every thing tasted different to me and I completely went off coffee for the whole of my treatment.  I found with chemo, I had about 2 or 3 not good days then I bounced back and felt normal again but as the months went by I did become weaker and slower. Keep your strength up and on your good days go for a walk or exercise . I had chemo for 9 months, every third week, I then had 35 radiation treatments. 

 

It it is a stressful time but I just kept thinking  “ I can only move forward in this situation”  

 

Your husband loves you and of course he is devastated with your diagnosis. You both worry about each other.  Tell him how you are feeling as he wants to know what you are thinking  but also tell him that you are trying to keep strong and thinking good and positive thoughts . Let him know that he is a great support to you and you know how he must be feeling. It’s not easy for either of you .

 

I hope this has helped you a little.  This is how I coped and got through it.

 

Keep strong of mind.

 

Best wishes

 

Jeana xox 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hi Cats and coffee,  I’m glad you plucked up the courage to join us as it is quite a daunting and isolating experience.  Here’s my story which has lots of suggestions for coping with treatments et al. lifeafterlola.com/

 

I recommend joining the monthly chemo thread on this forum once you know your chemo start date.  I found this really helpful: 

forum.breastcancercare.org.uk/t5/Chemotherapy-monthly-threads/bd-p/Chemotherapy_monthy_threads

Sending hugs. xxx